@jessicakrall8 - Thank you for creating such a welcoming and supportive environment here in the Shape Shifters group!

My work involves helping people adjust to change. As MFP/ F2F members, we are all making big transitions in our lives. We are giving up our old identities and getting used to (or testing out) new identities. So, there is discomfort through the learning and growing process. While improved health and fitness are ultimately positive results of this transition process, it can take lots of practice to adjust relationships, habits, lifestyle, personal history, etc.

Over the past two years, I’ve been dealing with some life changes that put me in the role of needing support through transition instead of giving it:

(1) At the end of September, 2019, the non-profit professional organization - where I had worked for 20+ years - restructured and laid off all employees except the Executive Director and one assistant to support him;
(2) In October, I started my own company after realizing how difficult it is for women to get hired after age 50. It took a few months to establish a few contracts and I’m still learning to navigate self-employment and business development; but, I was able to sign on a few clients by January 2020.
(3) Then, the pandemic significantly changed the way my clients had to work, and we needed to support the shift to Telehealth and online learning service delivery within Health and Education systems.
(4) My younger son graduated from high school during the pandemic and moved on to college - with some stints back home along with his older brother due to uncertainty before the availability of vaccines - so we became ‘empty nesters.’
(5) My father-in-law has dementia and my mother has had health setbacks that have reduced her ability to live on her own without support. I’ve been making more trips to Boston so I can give respite care to my sister and help my mother with household projects and repairs.
(6) All of these changes have affected my marriage, which has undergone significant adjustments over the past 32 years and is a major contributor to my uncertainty.

There are a few things helping me through these life transitions that I’m sharing in case they are useful to others. I trust each person to find the path that works best on an individual level so feel free to ignore any approaches that don’t seem to fit your own circumstances.

(1) Many of my loved ones are recovering from addiction or, if not addiction, at least unhealthy relationships with alcohol, etc. So, I became familiar with the ‘Serenity Prayer’ which helps me sort the problem that I can act on from the ones I cannot influence directly. I’m sure many of you are familiar with it. I don’t affiliate with a formal religious group but this mantra helps me: Please “… grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” It goes on about living one day - or moment at a time - and accepting the world as it is rather than as I’d like it to be, etc. but usually the part above is good enough to help me decide whether the problem is something I can solve or not. A lot of our anxiety stems from worries we cannot change so this can be a way to release those burdens and sleep better at night.

(2) I signed up for a career pathways course through my college alumni association to explore opportunities and expand my network. So, whenever possible, I set up a support and accountability group to keep me on track, similar to MFP, through difficult phases. The idea is to use free or low-cost options upfront (in a more preventative way to support the transition) so I don’t need more expensive intervention later, such as individual therapy or health treatment that might be needed to address the negative consequences of too much stress, sleep loss, etc.

(3) When I feel down, or depressed, I try to give myself grace and try not to be too hard on myself. I’ll acknowledge that our world moves faster than it used to, and has eliminated many of the rituals that used to help us through transition periods, so I might have to claim that time to release old views, focus on introspection, and integrate the new version at my own pace. I’ll breakdown the tasks I can control into tiny steps - or manageable chunks - and build a positive spiral of actions.

Sorry for the long post but I hope we can continue to support one another with ideas that help us move through the ‘funk’ that life sometimes sends our way. Thanks to all of you for being a part of this journey of self-improvement. I appreciate you!

izzyred9400 wrote: »

I'm not counting calories today as I'm celebrating my 62nd birthday today.Luckily I'm in a beautiful sunny place with my husband who I have been with for 42 years!!
I found a lovely cafe with delicious cakes.My dear Mum who I lost to Dementia made the most delicious Lemon Meringue Pie.I think this homemade one is on a par to my Mum's recipe.

Oh, what a nice way to celebrate 62 years young, @izzyred9400 !! Hope you have a lovely day with hubby in the sunshine!!! I sent you a note on FB first thing this morning!! Hope you have lots of tales to tell when post tomorrow!! Enjoy!!! You deserve all the best!!! Tell Hubby he has all of our permission to spoil you rotten!
Jessica

Daily Step goal: 6,000

Fri 4/8: 4,053
Sat 4/9: 6,575

Daily Step Goal: 8,000
4/7: 10,582
4/8: 6,670
4/9: 3,171

Stefbomb2020 wrote: »

Username: Stefbomb2020
Weigh In Day: Monday April 11
CW (Current Weight): 191.8

Hi @Stefbomb2020 !! Was wondering about you...glad to see you report in! Thought we'd lost ya!!! If you're going to be away and miss a weigh in, please send me a message or post early in the chat thread and I'll update you when away...or request an EXC if you're out of town or on vacation...hope all is well! Welcome to the Shape Shifters!
Jessica

Well the health bracelet I got won't charge now!! Boooooo I was on a roll!! Gonna see if I can count steps with my phone until I can get a better one!!
PW 195.SOMETHING
CW 194.2
GW 150

IM SO HAPPY TO SEE A LIL PROGRESS THE STRUGGLE IS REAL!!!!

I can not build a routine!! Life is all over the place!! Wake up to new piglets or fallen trees! Always something and then the day just never slows down from there!! Hopefully I can figure this out soon!!

How was everyones weekend??? my eating was not so good, oops, but I ended up working a lot and didn't really plan accordingly, oops. I am so tired and just want to sleep for like a day straight, luckily for me it is a 4 day weekend at job #1, and I am only scheduled to work 1 day at job #1, and I can not wait. Working out has been going fairly well, but we have a huge snow storm coming in, and starting tonight, we are expecting 9 to 15 inches of snow. So I will say it now, I am not trecking accross the yard in a foot of snow at 430am to workout

@angmarie28 So sorry to hear you have a big snow storm on the way...I don't know how people stand it. During my six years in MinneSNOWta, I saw snow from October through May and just hated it. Here in Virginia, we only have it Dec - Mar and I can barely stand that...and trust me, we don't get much...usually one big snow (8-10 in) and that's it. We've had a couple of years here that had none and I was blissful. I sincerely love the idea of palm trees with Christmas lights...post a pic of your snow if you don't mind. It's pretty when it's not in my backyard (HA!)

Hang in there...at least your job schedule is lightening up a bit...congrats on that!
Jessica

This last week has been a rough one. Last Monday my mother in law baby sat my kids for 3 hours. Wednesday evening my middle child starts throwing up everywhere and had a fever of 105.7. 😳 That lasted 2 days. My newborn also got such but thankfully not to that extent. Friday my boyfriend and I got sick as the kids started getting better. Saturday was the worst day, ever. I felt like my head and face were going to explode and I had got ran over by a truck. Every part of my body hurt. Yesterday was a little better but still sore and still had a fever. This morning the fever broke but I still am so sore. I've never felt pain like this before in my life, I can barely pick up my kids and struggled you walk. 😭 I'm hoping tomorrow ill feel better, because this is exhausting.