I decided I would do the Stronglifts program.
I have only lifted free weights occasionally and used the machines a few times.

When I went to the gym today to begin I received so many negative looks and stares in the free weights section AKA the MEN'S section, I felt incredibly uncomfortable and the gym worker there was less than willing to help me, I don't think he believed I should be there, he told me barbell rows were ADVANCED and almost didn't let me do them, I did them and he said I did fine, he also didn't expect me to lift much at all.

I'm not sure if they have an Olympic bar but I was kinda bummed I got the stubby barbell with affixed weights on the end... Can I still use this or?

He also said I shouldn't bench press to below my breasts, to the middle, this is not what the Stronglifts program advises...
He thought I hadn't been written a program because of what I was proposing to do, my program was all cardio, machines and crunches!!

How does everybody else deal with this?
I tried talking to my Mum but she doesn't even want me to do weights, she believes in all of the myths so doesn't really care if I'm upset about the negative reactions.

Feeling fairly alone here, so anything will help .

I follow the Stronglifts 5x5 program, and I love it. Very simple, and it has a set direction for deloads and even lowing sets when you can't reach what is expected. If you are honest with yourself about keeping good form, then you will progress accordingly. You can't rush this program or your body will be sorry. For that reason, and because I'm in my forties and don't recover as fast anymore, I only do the full body workouts A & B each, one time a week. If you find your back or knees start to bug you after doing the workout sessions 3x a week, consider backing off to 2x a week like I do. Also, I add two sessions of either HIIT or cardio a week and that seems to work good for me. Because I used to be a Personal Trainer (and because I have an old shoulder injury), I don't chest press below my breasts (my arm/elbow/forearm stay at a 90 degree angle at the bottom of the movement--it's safer for my shoulder). If you keep your shoulder blades squeezed together, like recommended in Stronglifts, even the movement I'm doing works the pecs, anterior delts, and triceps just fine. As for the back rows, you really need to a barbell with weights that let you start to pull the bar from about mid-shin level. Any lower and there's a good chance you'll start rolling your low back. Stack other plates up on the sides (like recommended in Stronglifts) to get the barbell equal to about mid-shin for you. This barbell back row might be advanced, but if you keep good form and start with a low weight and build up, I think it can work wonders for you.

Sorry to hear that your Mom doesn't seem supportive, but maybe she's not that comfortable with weights, so she doesn't know how to guide you. Keep doing what feels right (and safe), and find female in the weight room area to train with...or at least a male who welcomes you into the weight room. People love to teach what they know, so approach someone who seems friendly and looks in shape. Maybe you can start going to the gym at the same time they go, so you can be around a supportive influence.

Good luck!

Wow! I've never faced that direct of negative criticism at the gym for being in the free weights section. Very sorry that you have to put up with that.

I was lucky enough to have an ex-bf that taught me basic strength training via dumb bells, so it was easy enough to translate that into barbells (dumb bell chest press is basically a barbell bench press, for example). However, it was a long time ago that I learned, so when I picked up the StrongLifts program, I watched a LOT of videos and read a lot of blogs on how to maintain proper form. The SL website gives you good basics, but I would poke around other sites like bodybuilding.com or nerdfitness.com for more information. A video will help make everything clear in your mind how to do the exercises properly.

Don't give up -- the chauvinistic meatheads aren't always experts at form either (and neither are the trainers, unfortunately, although there are some very good trainers that are MFPers). Don't let their criticism, if not constructive, deter you from the free weights. (But by all means, value constructive criticism.) For every meathead trying to tell you you're wrong, there's a dozen women behind you waiting for you to trailblaze the way. Good luck! :flowerforyou:

omg i feel you!
night before last i finally worked up nerve to ask the 'head guy' at my Y if he would show me the proper form and weight capacity for me on the compound 4 lifts: deads, squats, chin up and before i even finished he interrupted me and asked, 'you dont wanna bench do you?!' i said YES! despite the fact that he looked at me as if i were green with antennae attached, he said he'd show me on friday (my proposed time). i said i really like lifting heavy and do the machines, but wanna get away from them and into the free weight room, around 10am, where it wouldn't be that busy and i could get the basics down. he then reiterrated that 'the machines are all i really need, but if that's what i want to do, then i'll show you.'
i walked out feeling completely defeated before even starting. i don't wanna be a cardio-hoe no mo'! and the entire time he was talking to be i was thinking,' you are a a complete d-bag and i cannot believe i even asked u.' he's not even ripped or cut (which i know isn't that important) but this is my goal and i felt somewhat ashamed for even bringing it up!
does he not know that i do not have enough testosterone to get all big and bulky like dudes? or, was he just being chauvenistic (sp?) and thought i didn't belong there.. i know i will be the only femaie in the weight room, but IDGAF.
tomorrow i'm bringing my brother-in-law (super cut) and he's showing me all the forms, weights, protocol, etc. even he is a little taken aback that i want to lift heavy, and mentioned the 'fitness models in the magazines.' i tried to explain that i'm on a low calorie diet and unless i eat 5000 cals a day and take supp's and do this for 5 years that i won;t get like that.
it's all very frustrating. but i can't wait to get in there.
kudos to you for having the balls and gettin' it done.
when will people learn.... lift like a man, look like a goddess

Good for you lisaisso! I loved that you came back stronger and more determined (with your brother-in-law) to do the lifts you want to do.

I'm sort of like you and 'caveats' in that if I want to do something...look out! At least that's what my husband says. When I wanted to learn the right way to lift and progress, I ended up studying and testing for 3 personal trainer certifications over the course of a year. I wanted to know first-hand how to do it right--matter of fact, I wanted to be an expert at it! I personal trained folks for a few years after getting my certs. I especially enjoyed showing women how to weight train. I wanted them to know that weights were not to be avoided, and if you know what you are doing, there is no reason to feel inferior or uncomfortable in the 'free weight' area of any gym! Machines are good for those who want to start there, but knowing how to use free weights is great ‘tool’ in the fitness box. Plus, the flexibility of free weight training, as well as the benefits to your core, is unsurpassed.

Anyway, kudos to you and KEEP AT IT!!! If you are an approachable person, other women will eventually come up to you for guidance in the weight room. Pass your knowledge and confidence on to them.

just trying to get some interest in a group for Stronglifts 5x5, I want to start next week, wanted to see if anyone wants to form a group thread for support and such.

good, are you doing 3 days a week? any cardio? which resources do you use? the website? or did you order the program? I have lots of questions:happy:

Thank you! I will message you, but wanted to post here to, just to see if I can't drum up a little interest in the thread.
The next question for me, I think, is whether I should get a trainer. And how to pick one...
I feel like I have been lifting but I would like some instruction on deadlifts. I have never done "good mornings" either...

ok, maybe you girls can help me, I felt a little silly last night, it occurred to me, there are two bars for the "cage" and one bar is 35 lbs and it is shorter than the 45 lb bar but I use them both, I wonder if they are supposed to be used for the same thing or if I am looking crazy using the long bar for deadlifts?!

Use the OB for deadlifts (i.e. the long bar...) - you'll be loading up the weight in no time, if you aren't already.

just trying to get some interest in a group for Stronglifts 5x5, I want to start next week, wanted to see if anyone wants to form a group thread for support and such.

I just started stronglifts this week, and have been looking for a support group of women... PLEASE let me know if anyone starts one! I'll definitely join!