Self esteem
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tporter1685
Posts: 4
:sad: 
You ever just have a day were you just want to cry when you look in the mirror..I just been so depressed when I gained this 20lbs I just lost last year, I actually lost 40 in total last year and now I regained 20 back. The whole purpose for the weight loss was because I was tired of hearing "you have such a beautiful face, if you lose some weight do you know how beautiful you would be?" So I was on the road to recovery I was like 15lbs away from my goal. I moved to Georgia from California to actually be with the person that told me that statement that I mentioned above. Gaining this weight back has made me self-cautious and insecure about my relationship. My lover has been befriending skinny women and I think it’s because I'm becoming more less appealing in their eyes. I stress all the time on there whereabouts and I just eat... and on top of that they have an alcohol problem and I think.. well if they get to intoxicated they might sleep with their "new found friend". I mean am I the only one who thinks like this? My weight issues are deep because I was compared with my sister on how beautiful and fit she was as a child and I was the dumpy one. I mean I weighed 127 in my teens and my ***** of a adopted women humiliated me and made me feel low and that beauty is a woman's self worth. I know it's not but it's installed in me and I can't think any other way. I feel like if I can't lose the weight and keep it off this time I'm destined for loneliness, which is another story in it's self ,going back to childhood abandonment issues. So I guess if anybody else feels were I'm coming from please respond with your story and words of wisdom.
You ever just have a day were you just want to cry when you look in the mirror..I just been so depressed when I gained this 20lbs I just lost last year, I actually lost 40 in total last year and now I regained 20 back. The whole purpose for the weight loss was because I was tired of hearing "you have such a beautiful face, if you lose some weight do you know how beautiful you would be?" So I was on the road to recovery I was like 15lbs away from my goal. I moved to Georgia from California to actually be with the person that told me that statement that I mentioned above. Gaining this weight back has made me self-cautious and insecure about my relationship. My lover has been befriending skinny women and I think it’s because I'm becoming more less appealing in their eyes. I stress all the time on there whereabouts and I just eat... and on top of that they have an alcohol problem and I think.. well if they get to intoxicated they might sleep with their "new found friend". I mean am I the only one who thinks like this? My weight issues are deep because I was compared with my sister on how beautiful and fit she was as a child and I was the dumpy one. I mean I weighed 127 in my teens and my ***** of a adopted women humiliated me and made me feel low and that beauty is a woman's self worth. I know it's not but it's installed in me and I can't think any other way. I feel like if I can't lose the weight and keep it off this time I'm destined for loneliness, which is another story in it's self ,going back to childhood abandonment issues. So I guess if anybody else feels were I'm coming from please respond with your story and words of wisdom. 0
Replies
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I want to start by saying you are so pretty, you actually look a lot like my little sister. As for your lover... Mates say stupid things so I know how you feel but you deserve better.
I understand trying to change for others but you have to realize the same thing I did which is single or not thick or thin happy or sad in the end it's still us and our feelings that mean most.
I moved from ga to tx to be with my love, I came here at 110 and 3 years later I was 150. Promises of us doing this and that vanished so the weight just crept upon me slowly. I've been battling between 135 and 145 the past year and sometimes feel like I'll be horrible if I don't drop it but I remind myself more important than a pretty face, nice frame, and a loving mate is my own peace, productivity, and positive perception of myself.
Your lover is not the only person checking for you especially in ga if you end up alone it's because you feel it's best not because you aren't wanted. Also just because you're alone doesn't mean you have to be lonely, you can make friends. Just like just because you're in a relationship and have 50 best friends doesn't mean you won't feel alone. It's about how you feel with yourself and others
I think we all go through and struggle with self esteem issues but in the end you matter most.
You may need time to just work on your comfort and confidence.0 -
What's most important is how you feel about yourself. When you look at yourself in the mirror, how do you feel? What people feel or think of you is merely a reflection of how you feel about yourself. You have to be able to look at yourself and KNOW that you are beautiful, because you are! Beauty is how you feel inside, and it reflects in your eyes. Once you have that confidence in yourself others will see it and respect it. It does help if you have people in your life who helps to boost your esteem but lets face it, there's not many people who are always there to do that for us. REMEMBER THE HATERS??? PLUS....you can be what some people consider to be the most beautiful person in the world and still have a low self esteem. You have to find something to do that makes you happy and boosts your self worth. Go for a hobby, do something that you are good at and that's self rewarding! Once you start to feel good within you won't give a flying f*** what anyone thinks about you. I think you need to "X" out what "they think" and focus on what YOU think. Are you happy with who you are and what you look like? If not, do something about it. FOR YOU! :flowerforyou: Losing weight and maintaining it and keeping in shape is a lifestyle. Are you happy with your lifestyle? If not, make some moves and change it. You have to make some important decisions and stick to them. discipline yourself. Know that you already have people ,ME and SweetProgres, in yourcorner now rooting you on!!! Keep your head up. We are ALL beautiful because we are God's children. Much love sister girl:-)0
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I just want to say thank you to you beautiful ladies for the feedback.0
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Anytime gorgeous!!!0
