what are you thinking while binging?
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Wonderful responses... definitely a bunch of people here who "get it." Love the person who wrote about salty/sweet... that's so me! I tend to be mostly unconscious... once I've given in I don't even bother trying to stop. How about this one... have you ever microwaved something that was gonna take a few minutes... and HAD to have something while you waited for it to be done?
YES!!0 -
It's very weird the emotions I feel or think.
"Stop eating this, stop eating this" says my mind but I do not stop eating.
Calling myself names in my head as I eat the bad stuff.
Sometimes I think about how good it tastes and how I have not had said food in FOREVER.
Sometimes I think how what I am eating doesn't even taste all that good, that it really wasn't worth it, but I sometimes keep eating it.
I think that this one time is ok, that I will not let this happen again. But it happens again sometimes.
The feeling of sadness, shame, hatred for myself, feelings of failure, all that stuff that comes afterwards is awful. Each time it has happened I tell myself, NEVER again. Not just the poor food choices in the moment but the emotions that come after are killer. I say I will not put myself through that but then it happens again. I don't know why. I know how BAD that moment feels too...0 -
The strange thing is that for me binge eating is almost a way of turning my brain off, not thinking anything, and just feeling comforted.
Not strange - I do the same thing! I think that's what it's about - escaping, numbing, not feeling, not thinking.0 -
Painful and comforting to read this thread.
I think about everything everyone said.
Also - I'm so sad and anxious as the food of the moment is coming to an end. I never want the binge to end. It tastes so good - and feels so good. When it ends its like an emptiness and sadness mixed with guilt and self hatred. I know its coming, but if I can just keep eating, I can put it off.
This exactly. I will go out of my way during a binge to get more food (even to the store), so that feeling will not end. When the food is gone, I feel nothing but hate and sickness. Those are the worst moments.0 -
I normally don't think. It's like I grab a bag of chips and the next thing I know the entire bag is gone. And they I say oh well, might as well eat bad for the rest of the day. I'll fix it tomorrow. Then tomorrow never comes.0
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"I don't care."
"Hurry up before someone sees me or wants some for themselves."0 -
Please note I have posted a monthly conversation thread for us: See link below and please share because we are not alone in this struggle with binge eating:
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/654612-be-support-group-conversation-thread-20120 -
"Well, this day is screwed, oh well."
"I'm such a fat pig, why am I doing this??"
"Once I eat it, it won't tempt me anymore and I won't buy anymore."0 -
Right after I shut down the computer (no more access to MFP)
-DONT! STOP! KEEP WALKING! GET OUT OF THE KITCHEN!
-just a few bites, i have 50 calories left today!
- i worked out a lot, im sure I burned more than the calories i recorded
- well, going over by 100 isnt going to ruin the whole day
-omg that tastes so good
-impossible to stop
-you suck, you fatass, you loser
-ugh my stomach hurts
-something salty
-something sweet
-something salty
-something sweet
-now my stomach really hurts.
-hate hate hate hate hate
-well i got that out of my system.... so...tomorrow.... tomorrow i will have control. tomorrow is a new day.
basically I start with trying/ pretending to have self control, then i justify what i am doing, then i get so mad at myself, then i keep eating because i feel like a lost cause.
I alternate between sweet and salty type foods... not sure why thats just the way the cravings come on.
After really being angry and hating myself, somehow i always feel so strong for the next day, and I cant wait to wake up and have another chance.
Generally, i screw that up too.
wow....yes, this is me!0 -
"Well, this day is screwed, oh well."
"I'm such a fat pig, why am I doing this??"
"Once I eat it, it won't tempt me anymore and I won't buy anymore."
Yes, me too!!!0 -
Most of my binges occur when there is a large amt of food available (bbqs, restaurants & buffets, baby showers) since I don't keep any, what I call, trigger foods in my home. It happens when I've gone over my calorie amt. for the day. I'm thinking:
-well I've gone over, so I might as well keep going
-I don't get to eat these types of foods on a regular basis, so I might as well have a few bites of each.
-Just one more (cookie, piece of pie, hanful of chips.......), which always ends up a few more.
-I notice sometimes I rebel against the fact that I have to watch what I'm eating (the it's not fair mentality)
-Sometimes, the I DON'T CARE mentality.
-I'll start over tomorrow.
The worst part is how I feel after I've eaten that way. I try to remember that feeling when I feel the binge monster creeping up on me.0
