What's YOUR number?

Yes, I watched the cheesy movie with Anna Faris this weekend! It kinda shocked me that they said that the average woman has been with 10.5 men in her life before settling down. Seemed kinda high to me, but I've led a VERY sheltered life! So I'm wondering... Do you think 10.5 is high or not as an average for a woman? What would you say is the average for guys? Higher or Lower?

Gutsy enough to share YOUR number (guys too!)? Ha, just needed a laugh after a long day at work...

And yes, I'll admit my number is very small...3 :blushing:
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Replies

  • AllanMisner
    AllanMisner Posts: 4,140 Member
    I married #1, but during an extended break up before we married did have a #2. After the divorce, I married #3. After that divorce, I came to realize there is a lot more to it than finding a compatible sex partner.

    I'm definitely 10+ now and think I've found the right one to settle down with.

    I think the 10.5 number isn't a bad consideration. What is your favorite flavor of ice cream? How would you know if you only tried one or two flavors before settling for one?
  • Carl01
    Carl01 Posts: 9,307 Member
    I just hope they don`t consider me the .5 :angry:
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    You know, about that 10.5 number: there are a lot of women who have a high number and many who have a low number. For example, my group of friends at college consisted of seven girls. One girl has had sex with 13 people in her life, and that is over a year and a half, while three of them have had only one partner each, and three of us have had none.

    If you average the girls who have had sex out, that is four sexual partners each for the four who have had sex. But because my one friend is such an outlier, her results skew everyone else's!

    But yes, I do think 10.5 is high for both men and women. But I realize that I'm a believer in having sex when you're in love, not just for kicks.

    My number is 0. And it will be that way for a while. And my number for kissing is 0 too - hopefully that might change soon. I would love to not be a kissing virgin by my 23 birthday!
  • will010574
    will010574 Posts: 761 Member
    I'm in the minority so far....I think 10.5 is low for both men and women, and it is only getting higher with upcoming generations.

    Personally I know I am way way over 10.5 and that doesn't bother me at all, I'm 38 years old. If I have sex with one woman a month for a year that is 12. So 10.5 who cares. Personally I don't care what a persons # is as long as if we agree we are exclusive I'm her last # until we decide otherwise.
  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    I think the whole exercise is really pointless, to be honest, because everyone is different. And everyone's opinion/definition of "being with" is different. I have a lot of "maybes" in there, depending on who and what we're counting. I've had some fun in my life - and some serious ones too.

    What's the difference, exactly, if everyone involved is GGG and no one is getting hurt? I feel like even at times when maybe (in retrospect) it wasn't the best decision, I've learned about myself, what I want/enjoy/dislike, and who I want to be going forward. They were definitely not all good sexual experiences, but all worth having for what I've gained from them.

    Thankfully I haven't gained any unwanted offspring or anything contagious :tongue: Gotta be safe, folks!
  • meagalayne
    meagalayne Posts: 3,382 Member
    I'm in the minority so far....I think 10.5 is low for both men and women, and it is only getting higher with upcoming generations.

    Personally I know I am way way over 10.5 and that doesn't bother me at all, I'm 38 years old. If I have sex with one woman a month for a year that is 12. So 10.5 who cares. Personally I don't care what a persons # is as long as if we agree we are exclusive I'm her last # until we decide otherwise.
    Add me to the minority. I really don't mind :wink:
  • usedasbrandnew
    usedasbrandnew Posts: 300 Member
    I think 10.5 is pretty low. Most of the people I know well enough to have that conversation with are at or beyond (or WAY beyond) 10.5.

    Personally I'm at 13 and I'm comfortable with that, I don't believe in waiting for love/marriage, because sometimes you just don't have the chemistry for toe-curling... then you end up stuck. I'd rather find out it's amazing in that arena and let it be just another reason to fall in love. :)
  • porcelain_doll
    porcelain_doll Posts: 1,005 Member
    5. #6 will be my husband.
  • RunningDirty
    RunningDirty Posts: 293
    10.5 = Wait. What? What exactly does the half mean here????

    Let's round up. 11 = "Conservative estimate." :wink:
  • AnnaPixie
    AnnaPixie Posts: 7,439 Member
    I think times are changing. I never got married but my LTRs were No1 (5 years together) and No2 (12 years together). I kinda lost track after that.............:noway:

    I'm not a big fan of counting conquests anyhow. And I'm not interested in how many women someone has slept with either. As Will says, its just the here and now that matters :flowerforyou:
  • Natx83
    Natx83 Posts: 1,298 Member
    I honestly couldnt remember, but I reckon I could count them all on both my hands and feet. Not a crazy number.. Not a man *kitten*..

    Its about quality not the quantity :wink: :smokin:
  • Nerple
    Nerple Posts: 1,291 Member
    Yeah, I am never reaching 10.5.
  • NCTravellingGirl
    NCTravellingGirl Posts: 717 Member
    This is just for fun, folks...There is no connotation that being above or below 10.5 is a bad or good thing. It's an average for a reason! I would expect more people on here to be above than below, being a single adult! I only meant do you think the accuracy of the number is high or low, not the number itself!!

    I read somewhere that it was more like 5 for adult women, so hearing 10.5 surprised me, though to Will's point, I'm sure that number is increasing.

    Part of me wishes I was higher, and part of me is glad to be lower. Either way, it's all good :bigsmile:
  • mrmanmeat
    mrmanmeat Posts: 1,968 Member
    You know, about that 10.5 number: there are a lot of women who have a high number and many who have a low number. For example, my group of friends at college consisted of seven girls. One girl has had sex with 13 people in her life, and that is over a year and a half, while three of them have had only one partner each, and three of us have had none.

    If you average the girls who have had sex out, that is four sexual partners each for the four who have had sex. But because my one friend is such an outlier, her results skew everyone else's!

    But yes, I do think 10.5 is high for both men and women. But I realize that I'm a believer in having sex when you're in love, not just for kicks.

    My number is 0. And it will be that way for a while. And my number for kissing is 0 too - hopefully that might change soon. I would love to not be a kissing virgin by my 23 birthday!

    13 in a year and a half is a lot. That's almost one a month.

    13 people for a 30 year old who started having sex at 18 isn't bad in my opinion.
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,063 Member
    You know, about that 10.5 number: there are a lot of women who have a high number and many who have a low number. For example, my group of friends at college consisted of seven girls. One girl has had sex with 13 people in her life, and that is over a year and a half, while three of them have had only one partner each, and three of us have had none.

    If you average the girls who have had sex out, that is four sexual partners each for the four who have had sex. But because my one friend is such an outlier, her results skew everyone else's!

    But yes, I do think 10.5 is high for both men and women. But I realize that I'm a believer in having sex when you're in love, not just for kicks.

    My number is 0. And it will be that way for a while. And my number for kissing is 0 too - hopefully that might change soon. I would love to not be a kissing virgin by my 23 birthday!

    13 in a year and a half is a lot. That's almost one a month.

    13 people for a 30 year old who started having sex at 18 isn't bad in my opinion.

    Haha oh there is more than 13 but I just know the names of 13 for sure - and we're only 22. This girl doesn't quite realize that having sex with a guy doesn't make him want you as something more or want to love you. All of us friends see that clearly but she doesn't. :(
  • oddyogi
    oddyogi Posts: 1,816 Member
    Hmmm. I'm definitely in the minority as well. I quit counting. Don't really care. I've been careful and I have no regrets!

    I've been divorced twice and have been through the "I'm single and free, **** yeah!" twice, so I've had my fun.
  • Natx83
    Natx83 Posts: 1,298 Member
    Hmmm. I'm definitely in the minority as well. I quit counting. Don't really care. I've been careful and I have no regrets!

    I've been divorced twice and have been through the "I'm single and free, **** yeah!" twice, so I've had my fun.

    Divorced twice at 25? I cant even get engaged lol.
  • oddyogi
    oddyogi Posts: 1,816 Member
    Hmmm. I'm definitely in the minority as well. I quit counting. Don't really care. I've been careful and I have no regrets!

    I've been divorced twice and have been through the "I'm single and free, **** yeah!" twice, so I've had my fun.

    Divorced twice at 25? I cant even get engaged lol.

    Yeah, I'm unique lol.. First one was young and dumb right out of high school, second one was just way too rushed.

    Not doing it again till I'm at least 30.
  • shammxo
    shammxo Posts: 1,432 Member
    I'm in the minority so far....I think 10.5 is low for both men and women, and it is only getting higher with upcoming generations.

    Personally I know I am way way over 10.5 and that doesn't bother me at all, I'm 38 years old. If I have sex with one woman a month for a year that is 12. So 10.5 who cares. Personally I don't care what a persons # is as long as if we agree we are exclusive I'm her last # until we decide otherwise.


    Good man.
  • r1ghtpath
    r1ghtpath Posts: 701 Member
    i'm at or under 10, i'm good with that. i went hog wild when i first started(18). had i not met my ex when i did (19), my number would probably be quite high by now.

    i am different in the sex part now. not drastically so, but enough that my number will NOT increase like that ever again!! LOL

    i don't really care what people choose for themselves, as long as they are safe and NOT spreading things.
  • kimi131
    kimi131 Posts: 1,058 Member
    I'm at 5, probably soon to be 6. Sometimes I wish it was fewer, but then I remind myself that I am thirty-one years old. Had I married and settled down early in life I know my number would be smaller.

    The estimate seemed a little high to me, but then it's an average.
  • BigBrewski
    BigBrewski Posts: 922 Member
    my ex wife was number 3 and now i am at 6.
  • Daisy_Cutter
    Daisy_Cutter Posts: 774
    I think 10 is low for men and women. I'm under that, but not by much.... however, I'm almost 40 and I didn't get married until I was 26.

    I don't think it matters either. Like Will said -- it matters about the current one and that's it. My ex-husband makes up for all you people that have low numbers... he's a total man *kitten*.
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
    I just hope they don`t consider me the .5 :angry:

    Nice one.
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
    My number is 0. And it will be that way for a while. And my number for kissing is 0 too - hopefully that might change soon. I would love to not be a kissing virgin by my 23 birthday!

    Wow. That's interesting. If you don't mind me asking, why the wait?

    Thanks,

    --P
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
    Haha oh there is more than 13 but I just know the names of 13 for sure - and we're only 22. This girl doesn't quite realize that having sex with a guy doesn't make him want you as something more or want to love you. All of us friends see that clearly but she doesn't. :(

    This is where I get a bit uncomfortable with this question. There is a lot of judgement passing that doesn't seem right to me.

    It's sex. It's not murder. Murdering 13 people by the time you're 22 is definitely excessive... Having sex? Who am I to judge her? And I won't even get into the inevitable double standard that exists around this question.

    --P
  • Prahasaurus
    Prahasaurus Posts: 1,381 Member
    my ex wife was number 3 and now i am at 6.

    Positive trend... Keep up the good work. ;-)
  • flimflamfloz
    flimflamfloz Posts: 1,980 Member
    Do you think 10.5 is high or not as an average for a woman?
    Seems like a nice/decent and normal number to me for a woman. Less than 3 and a woman in her 30s would seem prude to me.
    What would you say is the average for guys? Higher or Lower?
    I'd say higher for men.
    Gutsy enough to share YOUR number (guys too!)?
    I don't know about my number, probably not terribly high (whatever that means).

    I sometimes feel that my number should be higher (and it could, but I can't be arsed sometimes :laugh: ), but I'd rather improve my technique rather than my number to be honest - and I'm not sure that ONS are great for improving technique.
    Not that I've had any complaints in that department... but it's my personal wish is to make the act evolve from sex to art...
    "La perfection du geste"! (The perfect gesture)
  • stardustfan
    stardustfan Posts: 34 Member
    Do you think 10.5 is high or not as an average for a woman?
    Seems like a nice/decent and normal number to me for a woman. Less than 3 and a woman in her 30s would seem prude to me.

    I don't know if you can really say that less than 3 is prudish for a woman in her 30's. I mean, if a women has had mostly long term relationships, she could easily have such a low number. I'm 30 and only got to number 4 a few weeks ago. I'm not prude by any stretch of the word, but I've also only slept with guys with whom I could see long term potential (which led to long term relationships). Could my number have been higher, definitely! But as much as sex is just a physical act, I still feel like for me I need to feel the intimacy as well. Does that make me a prude since it keeps my number low?
  • NCTravellingGirl
    NCTravellingGirl Posts: 717 Member
    Do you think 10.5 is high or not as an average for a woman?
    Seems like a nice/decent and normal number to me for a woman. Less than 3 and a woman in her 30s would seem prude to me.

    I truly just was being silly when I asked the question, but I have to admit it's been interesting reading the concerns about too high or too low. I almost didn't post my number because I knew it would seem too low to many. I believe that women with higher numbers feel judged (mostly by other women) and women with lower numbers get judged (mostly by men). I am a Christian and know that my number "should" according to the church be zero so depending on the person, there is judgement there too.

    I can also share that while I'd love to say that my low number is because of choices I made because of my faith, that's a lie. It's a combination of lack of options and lack of confidence. Averaging 275 lbs most of my life meant very few men paid any attention and the few that did didn't interest me or I didn't want a guy who wanted a big girl because I didn't want to BE a big girl. So it's lack of options, not lack of interest, but to Flam's comment, I can see how someone might assume otherwise...

    It's all good in my opinion. I have a low number, and I am not running off to a bar or Craig's List to change that, haha! But I also know that the next man in my life will both be shocked by the low number AND when he learns that it doesn't imply what he thinks it does :bigsmile: