Making changes that are sustainable
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My husbands really supportive too. He loves cooking and us kind of semi-retired. He needs more calories than me so he often has extra toast or a muffin or a bowl of fruit or yoghurt. I can see him try to do this away from me a little so he is not eating in my face
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He does love to go to restaurants and red wine though - so we have a few favourites that I know I can work into my daily plan or else we walk for a few hours to burn off calories. We used to eat a lot of Lindt chocolate - he would bring it home from work for us to share. We had no idea what we were doing to our weight !
We both like going to the movies and always plan at least an hours walk normally before the movie starts.0 -
Lindt chocolates. Good friends of mine, too. Not that I see them much anymore. It just helps to have your partner in your corner. 0
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I have finally gotten it in to my fat head that this is it. This is how I am going to eat and live forever, I am at peace. No more struggling with myself. I don't feel deprived, never beat my self up if I binge on something. It is a really good place to be, b/c I'm not going to get fat again.0
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Thanks, I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks, lol0
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My wife will sometimes say “can’t you skip 1 day?” and I reply – not at this stage.
How difficult has this process been on your relationship? Keeping on the same path and moving along it together is so important. My wife has also lost a lot since we started. However, we have somewhat different approaches, which is fine, but I see things starting to get farther apart for us. I am very focused and committed to making this a life long change. I want her to find her own way. I can be obsessive and competitive which I know had a negative affect on her when we 'dieted' and yo-yo'd in the past. So this time, I'm trying really hard to just be supportive and encouraging.
I have to say obesity has always been my problem not hers. Like many people she’d like to lose 5-10 lbs, but she has always eaten in moderation and kept busy. I’m blessed that she NEVER commented on my weight except to say she wanted me to be around for more years. In fact, I often told (and still tell) there is no reason for her not to do what she has always done, while I carved out a new food path for myself.
Like you, I can be very “focused” (not sharing many details with anyone off MFP that I thought could derail my efforts) – She will eat whatever I make (I’m the cook / grocery shopper and she loves gardening, laundry etc), but I also bring her McDonalds etc. on occasion or other treats – I just don’t join in.
After witnessing all my failed attempts at Medifast, WW etc. - I think she was surprised at my fortitude and often would say “I can’t believe how good you are.” Admittedly, I loved those words.
When people would press me to “eat just a little” of this or that…she would chime in “you can’t tempt him, he won’t change his mind.” To me that was super supportive of her. If we were going to attend a social gathering – she would casually (during general conversation) tell the host ahead of time “he doesn’t eat a lot anymore and will likely just have a small portion. I just don’t want you to have food go to waste.”
At times (early-on), she did wonder if I was eating enough…until she started seeing the low-calorie nutritious meals I designed and her friends asked for recipes.
Next thing I knew I heard her telling people - “I don’t get it. He eats all the time and still loses weight.”
Bottom line – she knows I respond well to suggestions that I have time to think about. Hmmm. In fact there are times I have ideas that I actually think are my own. LOL
Not sure if any of this helps. Best wishes.
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It sounds like your wife 'gets it.'. It is much easier when your partner is not working against you. NikonPal, you are a lucky man.0
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nikkib0103 wrote: »It sounds like your wife 'gets it.'. It is much easier when your partner is not working against you. NikonPal, you are a lucky man.
and I know it...crazy part is...she says she is...LOL0 -
I really like your wife Nikonpal. I think she's a keeper 0
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