Need help starting
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Stress can play a factor in motivation:) and it sounds like you are gearing up for a busy few weeks as you get back into routine and such. Nothing wrong with sticking at TDEE for a long while. No one said you HAVE to cut anything!:).. As Tereza said, if you are happy and content where you are, there is no reason to change it:)
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Thank you @TerezaToledo and @Raynn1
I always knew stress was a problem for me but it became apparent after a laid back, lazy summer. Really nothing to stress about! And it made me realize that stressing is stupid.
sadly, I can't ignore all responsibilities year around, so I did make it a goal to chill this fall.
I haven't been tracking my macros.
I hope that as we settle into a routine (or at least get a busy September and first part of October out of the way) I can focus enough where tracking doesn't feel like a straight jacket. I think it will be helpful to go back to so I can make sure I am at my tdee, or could I push it up a bit. Or, at least, before I cut so I can not waste my time with an unsuccessful cut. 3 -
You will know when it's time to start tracking again, @saranharm. Until then, keep doing what you are doing, focus on getting your protein and lifting. Soon things will be settled in a different daily routine and you can make the changes you want. Putting logging on hold for now by no means mean that you are quitting or back into your olds ways. It means that you are progressing in this journey and adjusting things according to your needs and life. Yes, wasting time with a cut that won't be any good is just that, wasting time. I am so happy to see how you are growing and changing your mindset! You truly inspire us!
Tereza
Team EM2WL1 -
This is kind unrelated.
I'm watching a friends kids this weekend. I find watching other peoples kids overwhelming. They aren't bad kids just not mine you know.
Of course my body decides it's good timing to stay up half the night puking. Not feeling too great this morning.
All of the above combined reminds me of when my kids were babies, going through pregnancies, feeling like crud 80% of the time. I fELT so trapped all of the time. Kinda suffocated.
But now, minus the rare times, that seems like a different life. Even though my kids aren't that old (9,7,4)- its a distant memory.
So, time flies, this we know. I'm glad life keeps moving forward. The things I thought were so important at that time have either disappeared, or naturally progressed in life. The things i stayed up worrying about at night have proven to be unnecessarily stressful. The small things have added up over time. The big, monumental things are really few and far between. Things like moving or having kids, after a while feel like they have always been there.
So, I will continue to do the little things day in and day out.
I will also been thankful that my kids can watch TV all day long without complaining. Not every day can do that. Not that we do it all the time but it does come in handy when you feel like poo. One day does not make or break.
#crushingthedietmentality1 -
I am with you on that. We have to do what we have to do. Some days I'm thankfull for the tv, that they will not have a fit for having a low key day.
And yes, time just goes by and doing the little things everyday in a consistent manner will take you where you want to get. Just like looking back at when they were babies and it seemed endless, it already passed.
I hope you feel better!
Tereza
Team EM2WL1 -
Yup. Time does go by... its crazy how fast.. So why do we spend so much of it hating ourselves, our situations, our lives etc.. right?
Life is fleeting.. we shall enjoy:)1 -
Yup. Time does go by... its crazy how fast.. So why do we spend so much of it hating ourselves, our situations, our lives etc.. right?
Life is fleeting.. we shall enjoy:)
Thank you. I like coming back and being reminded, because its so easy to think about my "lack of progress" sometimes. Or, if one area of life isn't going too well, I tend to get disappointed in all.0 -
Hey @saranharm just catching up here! (I'm on holiday at the moment!)
I know what you mean about the motivation with wanting to cut.
When I ate at TDEE for the longest time all I kept thinking was, wonder when I can cut?
Funny thing is, when I got to the point that I could actually cut, I'm like meh! Not sure I want to now!
Kiki said usually the right time to stay at TDEE is usually when you want to cut and vice versa!
I have been kinda cutting over the summer, but my routine is so out of whack I just find it hard to really track it!
I'm not logging at the moment either. Sometimes it just feels like yet another thing that I have to do so kinda adds to the stress, and I think it does us the world of good to have a break mentally sometimes.
I'll probably go back to it next week when the children go back to school and I go back to work and I am back to 'normal' routines!
Ichel1 -
Yes, and stress really gets me! My goal this fall is to stress less. I homeschooling my kids so my schedule gets a bit rougher in the fall. Lol.
I will not cut until the new year. If I still haven't gotten back into tracking by then I think i will spend January getting back into that habit. Then I can cut feb-may or June with breaks. Summer and fall are too crazy for me to cut. So I think its winter and spring only. We will see when I get there. It will also be 1 year on em2wl and taking my lifting seriously so we will see if there have been changes then as well.0 -
I have actually considered cutting mid Oct to mid November and then again after our thanksgiving. I know people say to avoid the holidays but that's usually when things calm down for us. (We don't do too much holiday stuff). I'm just not sure that's enough at tdee? I ate at tdee jan- march. Cut (with breaks) part of march-june. At tdee July and august (and will be for September and first 3 weeks of October ).
I am reflecting a lot because of the crushing the diet mentality course. While I am happy with myself now- I do have a long term goal that hasn't diminished, even though the desperate desire has. I still want to get there, eventually and in the right way. I know I won't if I never force myself to cut some. I want body recomp too, for the record
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Something @Raynn1 said on an other thread, but I wanted to record here:
"Sometimes its not something you have recently done that makes a difference.. its a compound effect from months of being consistent that lead to a drop in lbs, or a change in inches or whatnot..Weight loss/Fat loss/Inches lost are not all linear.. so sometimes it can seem like nothing is happening, and them BOOM.. a big drop.."
Good to remember, especially when I am considering cutting- prematurely cutting probably.4 -
Just a few more thoughts: not sure how to process. I am doubting if I will ever have the self-control to cut. I cannot seem to even plan my maintenance day and stay on par with that.0
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@saranharm Isn't it funny that when we are not ready to cut, we just want to cut. And when we are actually ready, we just go, nope, I don't want to cut. I'm with you. Actually this thought plagued me even before I did a bulk in 2013. I didn't want to do it because I knew I would no want to let go of the extra food. But I ended up doing it anyway and haven't really done the cut since then, lol. Am I bigger? Well, I'm definitely stronger, more muscular, tighter and surprisingly not fatter of bigger at all, even hough I am definitely heavier. If I even decide to cut, I'm sure I'll be afraid of losing weight and therefore losing muscle and burning less calories.
Tereza
Team EM2WL0 -
Just a few more thoughts: not sure how to process. I am doubting if I will ever have the self-control to cut. I cannot seem to even plan my maintenance day and stay on par with that.
I think a lot of people think that way. They realize their goals and priorities shift when they are fed right, lifting heavy and things change without dropping cals. A lot begin to realize that happiness is not a smaller size, but being happy in your own skin. So its not uncommon for some people to just say F@$k it and stay at or close to maintenance and never really cut. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that at all.
For me, the longer I stay at cut, the more self processing I do and I like myself more. I fear cutting (a little)and finding myself struggling to jump down the rabbit hole again, and thats not something I want to do... So for now, maintenance is where I need to be, until I know I can mentally handle a reduction in cals and not feel the need to "rush" again and drop lots...I dont want to drop a few cals, and then get pissed if nothing happens.. lol.. thats the mental aspect of the journey.. when we think we are ready.. we probably arent:)
Kelly
EM2WL Ambassador and Moderator0 -
Consideration of health factors comes into play too.
If the amount to goal weight is minor and not really putting you into unhealthy status right now (and I don't mean the badly applied BMI), do deficit days as you desire, and don't worry about. Nothing says when you do deficit you have stay in that mode for x amount of time.
A very valid strategy when you do decide it's time is some days of the week at maintenance, some in deficit, and it may even be minor or more in comparison to each other.
Or what appears to be a calm week in general will be great for deficit eating, but a more stressful week would be better at maintenance.
But indeed for some the extra weight is not minor and is fat and is a risk factor for health issues - that's no good no matter how confident you feel about yourself and carry yourself and smash your workouts. But still gotta have healthy body to lose just the fat.0 -
TerezaToledo wrote: »@saranharm Isn't it funny that when we are not ready to cut, we just want to cut. And when we are actually ready, we just go, nope, I don't want to cut. I'm with you. Actually this thought plagued me even before I did a bulk in 2013. I didn't want to do it because I knew I would no want to let go of the extra food. But I ended up doing it anyway and haven't really done the cut since then, lol. Am I bigger? Well, I'm definitely stronger, more muscular, tighter and surprisingly not fatter of bigger at all, even hough I am definitely heavier. If I even decide to cut, I'm sure I'll be afraid of losing weight and therefore losing muscle and burning less calories.
Tereza
Team EM2WL
@terezatoledo its so true. In march I was ready to cut. So ready, in fact, that I rushed my reset. But now the thought is repulsive. Lol. I think you look great by the way. You obviously had a successful muscle building bulk. Yay for strength!
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Just a few more thoughts: not sure how to process. I am doubting if I will ever have the self-control to cut. I cannot seem to even plan my maintenance day and stay on par with that.
I think a lot of people think that way. They realize their goals and priorities shift when they are fed right, lifting heavy and things change without dropping cals. A lot begin to realize that happiness is not a smaller size, but being happy in your own skin. So its not uncommon for some people to just say F@$k it and stay at or close to maintenance and never really cut. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that at all.
For me, the longer I stay at cut, the more self processing I do and I like myself more. I fear cutting (a little)and finding myself struggling to jump down the rabbit hole again, and thats not something I want to do... So for now, maintenance is where I need to be, until I know I can mentally handle a reduction in cals and not feel the need to "rush" again and drop lots...I dont want to drop a few cals, and then get pissed if nothing happens.. lol.. thats the mental aspect of the journey.. when we think we are ready.. we probably arent:)
Kelly
EM2WL Ambassador and Moderator
@raynn1 I totally get that. I definitely said eff it. Then I pinched my belly in my belt, which is not only painful but kinda embarrassing. And it did make me realize that I do eventually want to reduce body fat. Some aesthetic reasons, but mostly practical for mobility and such.
I've also toyed with the idea of eating my usual foods (I know generally I am in the ballpark for protein. And fiber if it eat certain foods daily) and then for a certain amount of time just dropping one thing. I.e. if I eat eggs and cottage cheese and a carb that doesn't provide fiber for breakfast I could drop that carb (don't worry I get enough!) While "cutting" and it won't feel like an obsessive numbers game. Nor will I feel starving. Or dropping the butter on my popcorn or whatever. But will it be enough to eventually see results? Don't wanna miss out on any food I could be eating. 0 -
Consideration of health factors comes into play too.
If the amount to goal weight is minor and not really putting you into unhealthy status right now (and I don't mean the badly applied BMI), do deficit days as you desire, and don't worry about. Nothing says when you do deficit you have stay in that mode for x amount of time.
A very valid strategy when you do decide it's time is some days of the week at maintenance, some in deficit, and it may even be minor or more in comparison to each other.
Or what appears to be a calm week in general will be great for deficit eating, but a more stressful week would be better at maintenance.
But indeed for some the extra weight is not minor and is fat and is a risk factor for health issues - that's no good no matter how confident you feel about yourself and carry yourself and smash your workouts. But still gotta have healthy body to lose just the fat.
I hate bmi too. I would categorize myself as overweight, but not obese. I do not have any health issues. I don't even feel like my weight affects most of what I do.
I will definitely consider smaller amounts of time at a deficit. It would be much easier on me than looking at 2 months of a cut.0 -
Having some clarity working through the #crushingthedietmentality course. Great content!
I have devised a plan to put my eating on autopilot. I seem to be maintaining fine eating intuitively. But I laid out a few options for meals where I can get enough fiber and protein without tracking.
I am adding some cottage cheese/yogurt blend to my breakfast for extra protein. Also, going to get some chicken sausage at Sam's club for a breakfast option. I feel best if I get lots of protein in the am. Often times I don't get enough early on and its hard to play catch up- plus, if I have a protein shake in the afternoon or evening it makes me physically sick I have noticed the last few times.
I also decides if I don't have bran cereal for breakfast, like if I make pancakes or something, I will have a wrap of some sorts for lunch with a high fiber wrap. If I do have cereal, I will probably just have leftovers for lunch. While I do get some fiber from fruits and veggies it isn't a ton so I like to get in 1 or 2 servings of something high fiber per day to make it a bit easier on me. When I travel I use quest bars.
I think this feels like a good balance for me.1 -
Sounds like you have a good plan going forward!!1
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Thanks @Raynn1 ! I think, too, it will help me focus on other things. One, why do I feel so crappy sometimes. I have already found some reasons. I think that's what Leslie schilling was talking about- I always tracked but I never could extrapolate patterns from my tracking. Not seeing the forest through the trees, something like that.0
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Well, not sure how well my intuitive eating is going. I am up 4 pounds since my last weigh in sometime last week. I am going to keep an eye on it. Its obviously not fat, but I laid out my plan for today in my food diary anyways.0
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I think writing in a journal can help when you are trying to become more fit and get rid of bad habits. Is there a place to write your own thoughts on this site without it being a post on a public thread?0
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beverlyriley900 wrote: »I think writing in a journal can help when you are trying to become more fit and get rid of bad habits. Is there a place to write your own thoughts on this site without it being a post on a public thread?
No. I decided to make this a public journal because reading others journeys helped me when I first started. There are a lot of ups and downs- its normal.
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beverlyriley900 wrote: »I think writing in a journal can help when you are trying to become more fit and get rid of bad habits. Is there a place to write your own thoughts on this site without it being a post on a public thread?
Sadly no, it's either shared with ones on your list, or none, or everyone.
But it is nice to put notes about food in food diary and about what did or didn't happen with exercise in those exercise notes.
I'm sure it would make for interesting review and some possible revelations about connections.
At list limiting it to friend's list would limit number potentially seeing it - if they even care to look.3 -
@saranharm I have been reading older posts on this thread and you have a beautiful outlook on who you are and where you are headed. You have inspired me to do my own thread for my journey. Thank you. It is hard to take that first step and put your true self out there. Sharing your thoughts and concerns for the public to see and comment on can be daunting. You have an amazing self reflection.1
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beverlyriley900 wrote: »@saranharm I have been reading older posts on this thread and you have a beautiful outlook on who you are and where you are headed. You have inspired me to do my own thread for my journey. Thank you. It is hard to take that first step and put your true self out there. Sharing your thoughts and concerns for the public to see and comment on can be daunting. You have an amazing self reflection.
Thank you @beverlyriley900
The whole motivation behind loving myself as I am right now was inspired by someone else. This someone else doesn't see herself as in see her: beautiful. I figured that other people don't think of me as I think of me either. Its been the drive behind me so far and I have changed.
I'd like to think its helpful for others, this thread has been read about 4,000 times so obviously people are reading it.3 -
@saranharm @TerezaToledo can anyone start a journal/discussion thread in this group or is it limited? I have been playing around with the section "my blog" but I can't find what I have posted once I enter the information. I have also looked at the discussion site to maybe add a journal?discussion there but I think that goes to all of MFP?? I would like to put my thoughts down and I would enjoy learning from others and see if I get ideas for my journey from them also but this site is still a bit confusing to me. It is also difficult to find things again once I have stumbled on them. Thanks for your thoughts.0
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@beverlyriley900 You can create your own thread here. Just "create a new discussion", chose a title for the thread, write as much as you want and post
The good thing about a thread is that you don't have to write a lot every time. You just share your thoughts/feelings/questions, as short or as frequent as you want.
We will definitely love to hear more from you and how your journey is going and to support you. Go for it!
Tereza
Team EM2WL
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Btw, I must agree that @saranharm is amazing and has come really far in this journey! I see lots of good things in the future for you!
Tereza
Team EM2WL4
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