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I *was* joking about the totem, but then I found her on eBay and, well...it just seemed right! I won the auction, so she'll be on my way soon!1
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So at 4dpo, I think I'm as same as I'll be this cycle. Feeling good about my upcoming busy season at work, and looking into the future as far as January for work rated stuff without thinking about how a pregnancy fits in. If only this level headedness would last!
Off to my Bonco night with my ladies tonight to play and drink wine, then dinner with a college friend tomorrow night since I'll be in town for our trade show! She lives about an hour and a half away so we aren't super far apart, but still pretty far for dinner dates and things. Looking forward to this weekend!0 -
@Kirstie155 hold on to the optimism for non-TTC things and enjoy the weekend!
I'm not sure when I'll ovulate since I'm trying the vitex out. It's had the interesting effect of leveling out my temps which I think might mean my hormones are balanced? But that is just a guess, obviously. In any case we'd better start having some sex just in case the window sneaks up on me. We even got a new comforter yesterday! I'm not doing anything major this weekend. We were supposed to go backpacking but the weather looks awful so we're just doing some stuff in town, like a concert tomorrow night and a little Old West Festival that should be kinda cute. There's a pie contest you can pay $5 to judge, so sign me up for that! Sunday I'm going to prep for my fertility detox finally--just shopping and making soups and salads for the 4 days. I've been pretty good diet-wise during the days this week, but the nights haven't been so good.0 -
@Kirstie155 I agree hold the optimism for non TTC stuff. I'd say still TTC but try not to think about it at all. Try to reduce stress whenever you can.
I have a cute story.
I have two friends who got married about 3 weeks before Chris and I in 2015. They started TTC on their wedding night. Fast forward to 2017 and they tried IVF. The first round failed though
So they are starting round 2. The doctor told them to inform her when my friend's period arrives... and.. it didn't! She got naturally pregnant after the IVF! So she is about 10 weeks along.
When they came over I don't know if they were going to tell us but the husband slipped up and so did the wife. He was like "How do you like that baby monitor?" And she was all "Mark has to be back from working up north by December at the latest!". And I had keen ears
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Yay, I'm so happy for your friends getting g pregnant
Got my CD 21 blood results in, all super boring and normal! So that's good at least. Taking vitex this month starting after o to try and lengthen my LP, since last month it was only 7 days!! Currently sitting at 9dpo, so maybe it works, maybe last month was a fluke and this is normal? Shrug. I havent tested , and not planning to. Still temping and temps are high, so planning on letting that clue me in. If I make it to 12/13/14 dpo, let's talk about testing. Soooo tired of seeing bfns.0 -
@VeryKatie So happy for your friends, what a cute story!0
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@VeryKatie aww that's a sweet story. I'm happy for them!!
@Kirstie155 glad your bloodwork came back normal, and glad your temps are still high at 9DPO. Fingers crossed for you!0 -
I'm on Day 3 of this 4-day detox thing and am finally feeling human. Yesterday I couldn't focus on anything at work and today I feel pretty normal. Not particularly energized but definitely not like I want a nap. We'll see how the rest of the day goes. I guess the good thing about this form of detox is that it doesn't dictate how much I eat, only what I eat, so it's substantially easier than those crazy liquid ones.0
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Sounds like you guys have a lot of really fun stuff planned this weekend. Hooray! @VeryKatie That's great for your friends! @Kirstie155 Relieved your bloodwork is normal. Fingers crossed for you these next few days! @pezhed What a tasty fast. Awesome!0
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Sorry I havent been active much lately, but I doubt you all want me around in my current state of mind. I started cycle 8 on the first, and was pretty numb to it. Then I got really over trying to get pregnant. Once cycle 8 hits...its a real bad mind fuckk. Im not temping, screw those stupid prenatal vitamins, not drinking that disgusting grapefruit juice, my fertility necklace was flung off my neck. Its really not pretty when youre closing in on 9 months. Like I could be about to pop if we had been successful that first cycle. Mind. Fuckkk.
I had made an appointment with a fertility clinic, which I have now cancelled. There are steps in between, and Im just not ready for that mentally, or for the cost financially. I have some tests scheduled to make sure my plumbing is open, and another to check for something? Idk, whatever... its covered by insurance so I'll go. I told my husband idc if he gets the sperm analysis. Im not scheduling it-if he wants it he can do it, Ive done everything else. Im TIRED of fuckingg trying for a baby. Tired of tracking, eating right, not drinking too much, of hoping, of peeing on things, of being disappointed all the goddamn time! My period this month was HORRIFIC, cramps that doubled me over. Im done. I feel empty and hollow, void of joy for this process of trying for a baby. This isnt fun or magical, this is torture.
To protect my spirit and mental state, Ive clicked my brain over to believe we will be found infertile and need intervention. Im done doing everything I can to get pregnant, it doesn't work anyway. No more over the top trying to have sex every other day for 20 days-Ill try to get in a session or two around the right time. I cant obsess about this anymore, its making me depressed, and into a miserable awful person.
Trying to focus on stuff around the house, picking up sewing again soon. Mentally thinking we may never be parents... It will make it easier when cycle 9 rolls around. I may just drop out of this group, I dont have anything to offer anymore and dont want to be a downer all the time when I do post. I have joined some reddit groups with people who are in the same mental state as I am, and that has helped.
I hope you all are doing much better than I am, I wouldnt wish this on anyone.0 -
@Kirstie155 I know there are probably no words that'll help the pain and emotion you are feeling. You are in my thoughts, I hope that there are brighter days ahead and you're able to find your inner joy again. Hugs to you.2
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@Kirstie155 I'm so sorry about your emotional state. I hope that you can find something out at the appointments covered by insurance, and that your husband decides to get a SA. It really is an exhausting rollercoaster between hopefulness and disappointment and it's so hard not to obsess over this process that is largely not in our control. I wish I could help, but I just want you to know you add an immense amount of value to this community. You got us all temping, after all, and you're often the first to give advice when we're freaking out. Take time for you, though, and come back if/when you want to. I'm glad you've found the support you need on Reddit. You're in my thoughts!
This cycle is extremely unlikely to be it for us. I have bacterial vaginosis, husband and I both have colds, and we got a puppy last Saturday. O is happening probably today or tomorrow and we got one measly attempt in Saturday. Hopefully we can get it in tonight but our energy levels have been so low the past few days. Of course odds being low won't stop me from being crazy during the TWW. An almost-positive OPK (finally on CD25) sent me down an internet black hole. I thought I was being pretty chill this cycle but it's really just because it takes me over 20 days to ovulate.0 -
@sheilannesmith and @pezhed Thanks you guys. Today Im feeling better about things. O date is supposed to be this week or weekend. Still not temping, but I did pee on an opk earlier this week. My back pain is flaring up again, so focusing on helping relieve that pain. Sheila, I hope your pregnancy is going well. Updates? Amanda, thanks for the warm fuzzies-you're really sweet. I hope your bv clears up soon, and you and hubby feel better soon!
Totally off topic-our house is a wreck. Basement is finally being put back together…so we have flooring boxes in the basement acclimating (luxury vinyl tile called happy feet European oak, for those interested.) Flooring will be installed next Thursday. I have paint swatches all over the walls to see what colors will work down there, and a painter is coming to give us a quote today. Omg painters! I called 2 last Friday, one never called back, one called back but didn’t answer my next call for scheduling. The 3rd painter is hopefully more responsive and will be showing up in about an hour and will be able to get us on his schedule. 800sqft basement flooring and 2 tone paint with new baseboard is probably going to take a week to install everything…and then we are DONE!! The next thing is our electric, our circuits are wonky and keep tripping. Blowdrying my hair today for 3 minutes killed all the power to our upstairs bedrooms, hallway, husband’s office and server, and internet. Hair is a mess and husband is crabby. We need to get separate circuits.
Hope you all have a great day, and arent in areas affected by the hurricanes or wildfires!0 -
@Kirstie155 Glad today is better!
Pregnancy is going good so far, I've been dog-tired and it seems the bouts of nausea are coming more frequently. The doctor recommended some Vitamin B6 but I haven't got over to RiteAid yet. I just glanced at the blood and urine test results from the hospital and I'm kind of expecting a call to tell me I have a UTI and need a round of antibiotics. I haven't really had symptoms, but it appears somethings up with the cultures they did. Maybe not every trip to the bathroom has been babies fault. LOL.
Life outside of that has felt like a sh*tshow recently. The new cow I bought isn't pregnant, so I'm stuck feeding her all winter with no return on my investment. I owe my mom $1700 for her, but I think she's going to let me just wait on repaying her until after baby sometime. My mom was responsible for getting her bred for me before she came up and I'm not sure what happened there. It's very frustrating.
Then, we're also having electrical issues, we had been having 1/2 of the house lights go out randomly for quite a while, never tripping a breaker and then they'd come back on and be perfectly fine for months. It make it super hard to even call someone out because they'd go back to working fine. Well, Monday it finally got worse. They've been out more then they've been on recently and the circuits they are on can't take any load on them without dimming or killing the power. Hopefully they electricians will come out today, it sounds like they suspect we are losing our neutral at the main electrical box coming onto the property or perhaps even the power companies connections to us aren't great. Hopefully it's cheaper than hours of troubleshoot and replacing boxes, ect in the house.
Pile that on top of Marlin having some headaches recently be things might be attributed to a wisdom tooth and other dental issues (fun fact, both of us still have all our wisdom teeth!) So, he's felt like crap in general and trying to push it off until weather is a bit worse, but we have no dental insurance, so pile on another unexpected bill!
I still need to dump $2500 I don't have into my 4WD rig before it really starts snowing, the front end is totally worn out, tierods, struts, CV boots, all of it. It being it bad shape and loose steering helped put me in the ditch in white-out conditions last winter, so it needs done but still...I'm seeing my savings down to $0 and credit card balances rising...eeekk...
Good news front, the neighbor girls and their boyfriends are coming over tonight to start helping move the hay for the cows, so it'll be good to get that project done by this weekend perhaps.0 -
@Kirstie155 I'm sorry you've gotten so burnt out from TTC, but it's totally understandable after all the hard work you've put in and disappointments! *cyber-hugs* Glad you're taking some time off to focus on the house and your hobbies. Hope you get some good news soon.
@pezhed Bummer that you've both gotten sick. Try to stay sane!
@SheilAnneSmith Yikes. Good luck with the electrical work! And have fun moving hay this weekend!
Welp, I've totally fallen off the wagon. Haven't been to the gym. Haven't gone for walks. Have totally indulged every food craving right away and eaten like troll. Haha. I got so stressed from work and work-related drama. Had our 2nd busiest day of the year--Octoberfest, which we vend to the vendors on the town's street festival. Amazingly, my weight has held pretty steady around 165. Prolly cuz of the super long hours on my feet.
This morning I have to take a state mandated ServSave restaurant safety management exam. Been in 6 hour classes past 2 days. 2 days to learn an entire text book. Whee! But the teachers and other restaurant folks attending have been fun company.
Started some progesterone cream yesterday. Gonna try it twice a day and see if I can extend my luteal phase a bit. I think it's too late this cycle though as I started having cramps 3 days early yesterday. *le sigh*
Tomorrow going up to visit the in-laws for THEIR fall festival. Should be fun. Josh is toting along his new rifle (1st gun he's ever owned) to show off to his brothers. They like to set up balloons in a field at different distances and have fun trying to hit them. (They're not very good shots though, so hilarity ensues.) I might work up the courage to test it out myself.0 -
@SheilAnneSmith so sorry for all the financial stress. That isn't what you need right now! Was the electrician able to help you sort out the lighting issue at least?
@Alioth how was your in-laws' fall festival, and how did that progesterone cream work out?
My LP is consistently short, too, and I'll try anything. The Vitex and B6 seem to have failed me this cycle as I saw a huge drop yesterday and today at 7DPO and 8DPO, respectively. Blah. On to the next cycle for me. Silver lining is that I might get a few ski days in this winter after all!
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@Pezhed Yes, they were able to find what was likely fault work from their install job in 2013 (but they only cover work for a year!) Basically there was a poor connection at the top of our pole that supplies our overhead wire to the house. It had arced, melted the wire and was all green with corrosion from moisture/water. They only replaced 1 connection, had to use the boom truck to do it...but to my knowledge we haven't received a bill yet...maybe they'll take pity on us since it looked like their bad work and we are trying to entice them with future work!
The college kids next door just finished moving hay for me last night. So that project is done!
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@pezhed Sorry about your temp drop. The B vitamins haven't helped me either.
The festival and visits with family were fun, except for the parts where MIL and GIL harassed me and the hubs about lack of babies. Josh had to ask his mom to lay off. He promised to talk to Granny before we go back for Thanksgiving. I know it shouldn't bother me, but I was in tears the next day over it. It bothers him too. Anyway, I did not shoot the rifle.
The progesterone cream...not sure, but on the 3 days I used it, it seemed to level out my temps. If you wanna look at the chart, you can see the three days marked with P are the only level ones. I forgot to take it with me on my trip out of town, and then AF started to show. Anyway, progesterone cream shows little results in clinical trials. Taking progesterone orally or using a suppository is supposed to be a much better bet. But the cream is cheap and easy to get, so I might as well try it. I'm curious to see what it does to my temps this cycle, or if the luteal phase goes longer.
@SheilAnneSmith Ugh, it would be nice if they fix their own mistakes, I agree. And hooray for hay being done.0 -
Liz and Amanda, sorry to hear that the creams and vitamins aren't helping and that AF showed up again. Liz that sounds tough with the family. I hope they back off soon and give you space. In my experience, people back off if you tell them that it's a difficult subject and not to ask about it. How did your exam go?
Shelia it sounds like your pregnancy is going well! Those electrical issues sounds awful, I just had an electrician over too! Hubby was overloading our circuits with his servers and I couldnt blow-dry my hair without tripping the house! That's fixed, but he's coming back to update some other things in a few weeks. Oh, update on my basement! The flooring is in!! I can't post a pic on mobile but it looks fantastic. We did a luxury vinyl tile, European Oak color. Painting is scheduled for next week then we can finally out the furniture back and live in the space again! It's been 6 months, so ready for it to be done.
On ttc, we've been chilling this month, no temps, a few random okps. Had sex on my FF fw, and I should be like 7 dpo if past cycles are to be trusted. I'm enjoying being in the unknown. It's better than AF!0 -
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@Kirstie155 Glad to hear you're having a good, relaxing month TTC. Here's to AF staying away!
Home remodels sucks, there is still a shower and closet door not finished in one bathroom and we've been living here almost a year now....
I don't have much going on: I pretty much want to sleep right after I wake up and I want to eat right after I finish eating. That's pretty much my life right now...lol.
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@Kirstie155 that’s great that the basement is almost finished! You’ll have to get to a computer and post a photo when it’s completely done!
@Alioth I’m right there with you on the wanting to eat. I’m blaming the weather. Nothing sounds better than cookies (or really any sweet) to me right now.
I had typed up a big long post and of course hit the wrong “Done” button on my phone. Basically I am eating like a pig but finally weighed myself this morning and am starting to track again today, which will hopefully lead me to start eating at a deficit. I’m stopping OPKs for this cycle but going for acupuncture next week, mostly based on impulsive CD1 decision making. Keeping the appointment out of curiosity now. Still temping to keep track of this still-short luteal phase. Not feeling too optimistic overall.0 -
@Kirstie155 >__< I haven't posted because I feel guilty for not going to the gym and have been avoiding MFP. New flooring sounds awesome! You make me want to do something to the concrete in my basement. ...about to be late for work. I'll try to post tonight or tomorrow. Oh yeah, I PASSED MY EXAM! yaay!0
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Oops I got mixed up on who posted about the eating. Sorry @SheilAnneSmith! For some reason I can't figure out how to edit the post. Maybe too much time has passed?
@Alioth congrats on passing the exam!!
Oh speaking of home projects, Kris has been building a shed in our back yard from scratch, almost entirely by himself. I'm really proud of him. When he's done I assume we're going to go on an organization spree to figure out what we want to store in the shed. Maybe this winter we'll actually be able to use our two-car garage for our cars instead of our bikes and random crap! He's got it all framed out and is hoping to get the roof on before it rains on Thursday. I've been a little less-than-grateful at times because he's spending every second of daylight that he's not at work building rather than doing any chores, but it will probably pay off. It's sometimes hard to see the big picture.
This weekend we're going to Dallas for him to give a talk on the biochemistry of Halloween to students at UT Dallas. I'm, again, proud of him, and also excited to go on a partially paid-for trip out of town. And also to have a day off of work on Friday. Ahh but that reminds me that people are staying in our house while we're gone and we really need to get it cleaned up before we leave!0 -
@SheilAnneSmith Sleep sounds grand. You're always so busy though. I hope you get to rest up!
@pezhed Maybe the acupuncture will be relaxing and nice. I'm leery of anyone sticking me with pins. But so many people seem to love it. Let us know how it goes. Ooo. That's great that you guys are making a shed. When we had a farm, we built a shelter and had to rehab barns and a coop. All of that is hard work, but once it's up, it's up and worth it. Wow, Dallas. Have a great time!
Aag. So, I ordered stuff for this month, OPKs, mustard oil, and a soft cup to try out (for after BD), but none of it is going to come in the mail in time for my fertile window except perhaps the oil. Either I started my new chart a few days too late, or my body is revving up early. Not sure of the best way to chart spotting before AF. Anyway, mustard oil--when used as a lube, it showed better results than preseed for sperm motility in this study. I figured it's cheap and worth a try, anyway. If it turns out to be a dud, at least it's supposed to be great for your hair, skin, and salad dressing. Haha. Also, my husband pulled a fast one on me and bought coQ10 and zinc at the store today and started taking them. He is determined!
I'm feeling hopeful this cycle because of a dream I had. I know it sounds crazy, but last month, I dreamed I was fishing, but my line was flimsy string that would break before I could reel in a fish. And sure enough, I had early spotting and a short luteal phase. This month, I dreamed I shot a little deer against all odds with a .22, even though it's too small a gun for deer. (never shot any animal in real life) This could be a sign. ...sorry for the long post0 -
@pezhed Wow, let me know how you like acupuncture, a few people have mentioned it to me for my back problems, but Ive never taken it seriously. Your shed sounds awesome, great job Hubby! More storage space is a great thing. I hope you enjoy your trip out of town, your husband must be super smart
Sheila, I hope you get your energy back soon Growing a baby is hard work! Congrats @Alioth on passing your exam! And I hope your mustard oil and stuff gets here in time, fingers crossed this is your month with your crazy dreams!
Dont worry about not going to the gym, come talk to us anyway...we wont judge! I ate a carton of Ben and Jerrys last night...you guys arent going to believe this!! My master bathroom shower has now been ripped out because someone did a home fix to a major shower leak years ago and I just discovered it. After dealing with water and mold abatement people, and spending a grand to NOT have a shower anymore...I needed that ice cream! Also my neighbor told me yesterday when she came over to visit while the guy was ripping out my shower that shes 12 weeks with her second. Yay for her but ugghhhh. Is it my turn yet?!
My master bath shower:
On to my good news!!
Here is the flooring! As you can see, painting isnt done yet.
Basement bathroom (thank god we have this one to use!)
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@SheilAnneSmith I have to agree with the above, sleep is good! haha
@Alioth Congratulations on passing your exam!
Fingers crossed that this is your month! Baby dust sent your way!
@pezhed Extra storage room is always nice, hope you two have a safe trip!
@Kirstie155 Love the flooring! that sucks about the master shower though. My parents just had to redo their bathroom not that long ago because their tub had a crack in it. Thankfully there wasn't any damage underneath but it was still a pretty costly thing to deal with and a giant pain. (They also have a second bathroom so yay for that!)0 -
OMG @Kirstie155 that sucks so much! Hey, maybe it's an opportunity for a dream bathroom now? At least your flooring is beautiful!
@Alioth you made me nearly LOL with "skin, hair, and salad dressing"! That's so cute about your husband going out to get supplements. I hope yours dreams end up meaning something and this is your month!
Regarding acupuncture I'm at least hoping it's relaxing, like a massage, even though a massage isn't the same as getting pricked by needles. My friend gets it for her ankylosing spondylitis and says it helps her back pain immensely. I'm not sure what it will have to do with fertility but I'm trying to keep an open mind. Honestly I feel like any modicum of control I can convince myself I have over this process helps me mentally.0 -
Sorry for not posting! Keith hasn't been well since last week. He got his vaccines and one of them was oral and upset his tummy. And somehow I managed to time it perfectly with teething and the 4 month sleep regression...
I will be reading though!0 -
@VeryKatie Aww, sorry to hear the little one isn't feeling well! Hopefully things settle down soon and he starts feeling better!0
