Food fails
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auntstephie321 wrote: »macchiatto wrote: »I finally bought parchment paper, and several weeks later (tonight) I finally tried to make the keto cheese "crisps"/"crackers."
Ended up throwing them out. They were a weird melted mess and the taste was just off.
I'll try again another day with different cheese, maybe cheddar.
The drier the cheese the easier it is also anything shredded works well too
That might have been the problem. A friend had given me a 3lb wheel of frozen mozzarella. I had defrosted it and was trying to use it up. It was very soft when it defrosted though so it was a little hard to work with. I made a broccoli cheese soup with 1 lb and then tried the cheese crisps. Mess! I might try with shredded next time. I'll also keep the microwave option in mind. I've tried that before but don't think I nuked them quite long enough.1 -
I've used mozzarella too might just have to cook longer0
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Anyone happen to have a go-to recipe featuring eggs, cheese and olives?0
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I killed steak during All Animal April. My thinking was that rare is probably better for me than my prefered medium to medium well steak. I was making a huge ribeye on the BBQ. It was very thick and I undeestimated how long it should cook ... it was so undercooked it was almost blue purple. Yuck. I had to start the grill again and cook it longer, which wasn't great for tenderness.
I had a few baking duds last Xmas too when cutting back on sugar and stevia. I honestly didn't think they were bad but even the kids didn't want them LOL2 -
I use full pieces of presliced cheese (Sargento's is a good thickness) crisped in the microwave to use as "bread" for lunchmeat to make "sandwiches". Had one today with pastrami. They're crunchy but you sort of learn how to hold them and bite into them so they don't break apart.1
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Anyone happen to have a go-to recipe featuring eggs, cheese and olives?
Frittatas are good, my husband (my kitchen skills are lacking) says to use 5 or 6 eggs, about 1/2 feta cup of cheese, and olives. Its kind of like a Mediterranean omelet. Mix it all up and bake for 30 minutes or so at 350.
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[Frittatas are good, my husband (my kitchen skills are lacking) says to use 5 or 6 eggs, about 1/2 feta cup of cheese, and olives. Its kind of like a Mediterranean omelet. Mix it all up and bake for 30 minutes or so at 350.
I'm going to have to make this very soon! Thanks for sharing.
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Last week I used way too much salt making my first batch of sauerkraut...so it's basically preserved, salty *kitten* cabbage at this point. I do have a backup batch merrily rotting away, however.1
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Last fall I tried a low carb version of pumpkin spice latte. Sad to see all that coffee being poured down the drain! Had a brief look online for sugar free pumpkin spice syrup, but super pricey.0
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I tried to make a Keto cheesecake pumpkin pie with a flax meal/flour crust. I had to keep cooking it way over the stated time until the crust started getting too dark. After it cooled I took a bite and it was awful!!! Raw pumpkin taste, dumped right out. Another was Keto brownies made with cauliflower. They tasted awful!!! I don't know what I did wring because there were comments on the recipe website saying how good they were! Oh, one more. I made a lemon curd pie and the coconut crust slid down the pan. Supposedly this was to be expected, but mine slid into a puddle. The lemon curd took like 6 eggs and called for 4 lemons' worth of zest. It turned out sooooo sour! We ate it anyway...at least the crust tasted good! Lol!
Cheesecake can be touchy to make right when using normal ingredients. I make (well no, MADE) an awesome cheesecake. When you start subbing things out for flour and sugar, it can go wrong very fast. Keto baking is a very different animal from normal baking. I tried making a keto cheesecake a few months ago. It was ok, but not completely happy with it. I need to play with the recipe again and see if I can make it better.
I have also noticed some keto recipes that get some raves are just horrible to me. I guess its just different tastes for different people.1 -
Bread. Don't have to worry about that now but bread has ALWAYS been a disaster for me. My loaves of bread always resembled a rock. I read all the tips but was never successful. Guess someone was trying to tell me something??2
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This is pre-keto. I had made a casserole of scalloped potatoes with ham and put it in the oven. Then DH decided to run a couple errands and asked me to come along which I did - forgetting about the casserole in the oven. We were gone longer than anticipated when we finally turned down our road. We could see all the flashing red lights. OMG! What happened and to who??? As we got closer, we could see 3 firetrucks, 3 squad cars and an ambulance. Then we realized they were in front of our house with a squad in our driveway. So we parked and walked over to one of the officers and learned our security company had called b/c the smoke alarm had gone off and no one answered when they called. My scalloped potatoes had boiled over and had heavily smoked up the house. All the neighbors were out watching this, BTW. We arrived just as the fire department were about to force our door for entry. Yeah, that was a pretty big fail (sheepish grin here).7
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Uh... I've got a stovetop espresso machine that seems to clean, fill, and start itself a-brewing without even telling me...4
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@suzqtme Dear me. I forgot about my many times of setting a pan on the stove, getting distracted and creating flames. Fortunately, I was always home. <knocks on wood again>. Usually sitting at my computer saying to my self "What's that noise. What's that smell". Duh, me.
I did that hard boiling eggs once....when I remembered them the pan was dry....sigh.0 -
Been there, done that too @RowdysLady. Burnt eggs smell nasty and taste worse. Had to try them, just to see.2
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RowdysLady wrote: »@suzqtme Dear me. I forgot about my many times of setting a pan on the stove, getting distracted and creating flames. Fortunately, I was always home. <knocks on wood again>. Usually sitting at my computer saying to my self "What's that noise. What's that smell". Duh, me.
I did that hard boiling eggs once....when I remembered them the pan was dry....sigh.
OK, this is embarrassing but I did this at the firehouse once. I was boiling some eggs for my lunch and forgot to turn them off when we went on a call. Did you know that when you boil eggs dry that they will EXPLODE?! Blew the lid off the pan, the kitchen was covered in bits of egg and the whole station was filled with the smoke of burning eggs.
They still give me a hard time about cooking!6 -
This is pre-keto. I had made a casserole of scalloped potatoes with ham and put it in the oven. Then DH decided to run a couple errands and asked me to come along which I did - forgetting about the casserole in the oven. We were gone longer than anticipated when we finally turned down our road. We could see all the flashing red lights. OMG! What happened and to who??? As we got closer, we could see 3 firetrucks, 3 squad cars and an ambulance. Then we realized they were in front of our house with a squad in our driveway. So we parked and walked over to one of the officers and learned our security company had called b/c the smoke alarm had gone off and no one answered when they called. My scalloped potatoes had boiled over and had heavily smoked up the house. All the neighbors were out watching this, BTW. We arrived just as the fire department were about to force our door for entry. Yeah, that was a pretty big fail (sheepish grin here).
That one definitely takes first prize. I've had some cooking disappointments in my time but none involving first responders.5 -
mandycat223 wrote: »This is pre-keto. I had made a casserole of scalloped potatoes with ham and put it in the oven. Then DH decided to run a couple errands and asked me to come along which I did - forgetting about the casserole in the oven. We were gone longer than anticipated when we finally turned down our road. We could see all the flashing red lights. OMG! What happened and to who??? As we got closer, we could see 3 firetrucks, 3 squad cars and an ambulance. Then we realized they were in front of our house with a squad in our driveway. So we parked and walked over to one of the officers and learned our security company had called b/c the smoke alarm had gone off and no one answered when they called. My scalloped potatoes had boiled over and had heavily smoked up the house. All the neighbors were out watching this, BTW. We arrived just as the fire department were about to force our door for entry. Yeah, that was a pretty big fail (sheepish grin here).
That one definitely takes first prize. I've had some cooking disappointments in my time but none involving first responders.
Can't argue that - but at least the HAZMAT team hadn't arrived by the time they got back.
Or a bomb squad.2 -
If I even mention "lemon chicken" in my house, my kids are begging for peanut butter sandwiches or anything else!!
My husband was in Korea at the time. Me and 3 of my little ones were looking forward to something different. I could have sworn I followed the recipe to a "t" but apparently I did not or it was just that bad. However with all the rave reviews.....it had to be me!!! The chicken was pucker your mouth nasty. It tasted like sour burnt lemon with no other flavors. Mind you it was also the ugliest batch of chicken tenderloins I have ever seen too....all sickeningly whitish and flubbery looking with some black pepper specks on it.
Yeah...I don't make or crave lemon chicken anymore and I darn sure don't use tenderloins anymore!!!
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LemonMarmalade wrote: »The chicken was pucker your mouth nasty. It tasted like sour burnt lemon with no other flavors. Mind you it was also the ugliest batch of chicken tenderloins I have ever seen too....all sickeningly whitish and flubbery looking with some black pepper specks on it.
Bwaahahahaa!
Did you put it in a bag and take it to a hockey game?1 -
My first attempt on Jewish chicken soup. Made the matzo balls from scratch. Proudly put them into the slow cooked soup that had been cooking for 20 hours.
What I ended up with was slow cooked chicken soup sludge, as the matzo balls disintegrated. It did not taste all that great either.1 -
My epic fail was making my own egg drop soup. I sounds easy enough but I made it SO salty that I couldn't even stomach it. After the salty broth, soy sauce, and adding actual table salt.. I might as well of just poured nothing but salt in a bowl and ate that plain
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silverfiend wrote: »RowdysLady wrote: »@suzqtme Dear me. I forgot about my many times of setting a pan on the stove, getting distracted and creating flames. Fortunately, I was always home. <knocks on wood again>. Usually sitting at my computer saying to my self "What's that noise. What's that smell". Duh, me.
I did that hard boiling eggs once....when I remembered them the pan was dry....sigh.
OK, this is embarrassing but I did this at the firehouse once. I was boiling some eggs for my lunch and forgot to turn them off when we went on a call. Did you know that when you boil eggs dry that they will EXPLODE?! Blew the lid off the pan, the kitchen was covered in bits of egg and the whole station was filled with the smoke of burning eggs.
They still give me a hard time about cooking!
This literally made me lol. Just last week I had eggs on the stove and went to the basement to lift weights. I made sure I ran upstairs after every set to make sure they didnt boil over...Ive had experience with that as well! Im notorious for getting distracted and walking away while making tea, boiling eggs. You aren't alone!
ETA: My gas grill always catches fire and burns my food. It was left by the previous owners of our house last year, and we are saving up to buy a new one. Its rusty and busted. Sometimes usually the grease trap catches fire and we have started having a standby cup of water to throw on there to put the fire out. Did you know you can both burn and under cook your chicken at the same time? Its getting embarrassing when we have people over for barbecues!1 -
@Kirstie155 - That's taking culinary art to new heights!
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@Kirstie155 ROFLMAO
Thank you for sharing0 -
mandycat223 wrote: »This is pre-keto. I had made a casserole of scalloped potatoes with ham and put it in the oven. Then DH decided to run a couple errands and asked me to come along which I did - forgetting about the casserole in the oven. We were gone longer than anticipated when we finally turned down our road. We could see all the flashing red lights. OMG! What happened and to who??? As we got closer, we could see 3 firetrucks, 3 squad cars and an ambulance. Then we realized they were in front of our house with a squad in our driveway. So we parked and walked over to one of the officers and learned our security company had called b/c the smoke alarm had gone off and no one answered when they called. My scalloped potatoes had boiled over and had heavily smoked up the house. All the neighbors were out watching this, BTW. We arrived just as the fire department were about to force our door for entry. Yeah, that was a pretty big fail (sheepish grin here).
That one definitely takes first prize. I've had some cooking disappointments in my time but none involving first responders.
Can't argue that - but at least the HAZMAT team hadn't arrived by the time they got back.
Or a bomb squad.
@RalfLott, Yeah, but you haven't heard my story about the time the SWAT team was out in our neighborhood, have you? They evacuated a 6 block area. OR the time a car in which our neighbor had stuffed the body of a guy he murdered and then left parked in OUR driveway. The body had been stuffed down a hole augered into the ice by then, thank God! Oh, I could go on. But I must admit, never had anything to do with the bomb squad (yet).
And having worked in forensic toxicology most of my career, I was on speaking terms with Hazmat at work, but fortunately not at my home. Hmmm, maybe I should write that book...
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