Dealing with Guilt

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KBurkhardt08
KBurkhardt08 Posts: 141 Member
Hi Everyone!

So this morning my boss brought in these adorable mini donuts...and I tried to have self control but failed and had 2. So instead of the planned mini bagels I ended up with mini donuts. Now here I am feeling guilty about eating donuts. I know I'm going to burn enough calories with exercise today to be under my goal but I'm still kicking myself a bit.

I'm wondering if anyone ever feels this way and how they deal with it? Guilt over eating certain foods is definitely a problem for me so any advice or helpful tips is appreciated! :smile:
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Replies

  • Fatimahasnain
    Fatimahasnain Posts: 91 Member
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    Hello dear @KBurkhardt08 my situation is same like yours and sadly it will continue whole weekend as my friends are coming to visit me and obviously we will have lot of eating.. I m feeling so guilty as I don't want to ruin this challenge...
  • SmithsonianEmpress
    SmithsonianEmpress Posts: 1,163 Member
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    Last night I went out to eat for my friend’s birthday. It was Mexican and oh so delicious. I had cheese enchiladas, black beans and rice and I drank water with lemon and I did have a few chips with black bean dip while we waited for our food. I was so stuffed I had a stomach ache.

    For me I know I don’t eat like that all the time. If I did I’d be in trouble. Two mini donuts is NOTHING compared to what I ate and I felt guilty for half a second then I got myself together mentally and was like it’s no big deal.

    I think as long as you take SMALL liberties, sparingly, and continue to stay active you’re good.
  • KBurkhardt08
    KBurkhardt08 Posts: 141 Member
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    Hello dear @KBurkhardt08 my situation is same like yours and sadly it will continue whole weekend as my friends are coming to visit me and obviously we will have lot of eating.. I m feeling so guilty as I don't want to ruin this challenge...

    I definitely understand. Hard to just let go but at the same time you need to live your life and enjoy moments with your friends. :smile:
  • KBurkhardt08
    KBurkhardt08 Posts: 141 Member
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    Last night I went out to eat for my friend’s birthday. It was Mexican and oh so delicious. I had cheese enchiladas, black beans and rice and I drank water with lemon and I did have a few chips with black bean dip while we waited for our food. I was so stuffed I had a stomach ache.

    For me I know I don’t eat like that all the time. If I did I’d be in trouble. Two mini donuts is NOTHING compared to what I ate and I felt guilty for half a second then I got myself together mentally and was like it’s no big deal.

    I think as long as you take SMALL liberties, sparingly, and continue to stay active you’re good.

    True! Thank you! I know a lot of these thoughts are cause I didn't do super well this week but tomorrow is a new day.

    I also just want to say that I am really appreciative of this group already. Normally I wouldn't have anyone to talk to about these crazy thoughts. Glad to have a group with like minded helpful people.
  • LynnJ9
    LynnJ9 Posts: 414 Member
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    I think mini donuts are less calories than mini bagels, so you win!
  • SmithsonianEmpress
    SmithsonianEmpress Posts: 1,163 Member
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    Last night I went out to eat for my friend’s birthday. It was Mexican and oh so delicious. I had cheese enchiladas, black beans and rice and I drank water with lemon and I did have a few chips with black bean dip while we waited for our food. I was so stuffed I had a stomach ache.

    For me I know I don’t eat like that all the time. If I did I’d be in trouble. Two mini donuts is NOTHING compared to what I ate and I felt guilty for half a second then I got myself together mentally and was like it’s no big deal.

    I think as long as you take SMALL liberties, sparingly, and continue to stay active you’re good.

    True! Thank you! I know a lot of these thoughts are cause I didn't do super well this week but tomorrow is a new day.

    I also just want to say that I am really appreciative of this group already. Normally I wouldn't have anyone to talk to about these crazy thoughts. Glad to have a group with like minded helpful people.

    I’m so glad you have an outlet! We are here for you :smile:
  • happygirlxxx
    happygirlxxx Posts: 301 Member
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    Is hard to share these concerns / doubts with someone who doesn’t have issues with weight / food ... my husband sometimes looks at me like I am cray cray :smiley: so it is great to have this source is support, because regardless of our own individual goals, we each know what the other is going through.

    Having said that ... if you felt the donuts were a bit heavier than what you were expecting to have that day, then if you can, adjust your food for the rest of the day or the next day to compensate. When not possible, I would add extra steps o workout to try to burn part of those calories and drink tons of water.

    And if none of this is possible ... then tomorrow is a new day; a new start :) I take this process day by day because it’s not an easy one (unfortunately!) and I count each day that I managed to do something positive towards my weighloss as a win.

    We can do this and we will!

  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 951 Member
    edited January 2018
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    Last night I went out to eat for my friend’s birthday. It was Mexican and oh so delicious. I had cheese enchiladas, black beans and rice and I drank water with lemon and I did have a few chips with black bean dip while we waited for our food. I was so stuffed I had a stomach ache.

    For me I know I don’t eat like that all the time. If I did I’d be in trouble. Two mini donuts is NOTHING compared to what I ate and I felt guilty for half a second then I got myself together mentally and was like it’s no big deal.

    I think as long as you take SMALL liberties, sparingly, and continue to stay active you’re good.

    True! Thank you! I know a lot of these thoughts are cause I didn't do super well this week but tomorrow is a new day.

    I also just want to say that I am really appreciative of this group already. Normally I wouldn't have anyone to talk to about these crazy thoughts. Glad to have a group with like minded helpful people.

    Good post. IMO it's good to work with the thoughts & emotions around food so we can drop that useless guilt eventually, and just fit everything we want to eat into our goals. The struggle with food guilt is real! You've got the right idea: log it, learn from it and move on.
  • kpush910
    kpush910 Posts: 28 Member
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    So, am I a bad mom for wanting my kids to go back to college so I can get rid of all the crappy food and beer they always seem to have around!? Its been fun going out to lunches and having the request their favorite foods, like the local pizza, and Italian beef sandwiches, but I really want my routine and Refrigerator back!
  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 951 Member
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    kpush910 wrote: »
    So, am I a bad mom for wanting my kids to go back to college so I can get rid of all the crappy food and beer they always seem to have around!? Its been fun going out to lunches and having the request their favorite foods, like the local pizza, and Italian beef sandwiches, but I really want my routine and Refrigerator back!

    Oh haha, I agree: it’s totally ok to want your fridge back!
  • happygirlxxx
    happygirlxxx Posts: 301 Member
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    kpush910 wrote: »
    So, am I a bad mom for wanting my kids to go back to college so I can get rid of all the crappy food and beer they always seem to have around!? Its been fun going out to lunches and having the request their favorite foods, like the local pizza, and Italian beef sandwiches, but I really want my routine and Refrigerator back!

    Not really, I am in the same situation but with MIL ... one more week to go ... it’s been nice having her visit but time to go back!
  • YAJ3507
    YAJ3507 Posts: 41 Member
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    I had the same issue - I went out last night and had a few beers. But I ate well all day and had a light dinner so at the end of the day I felt good. Usually if I slip like that I just throw in the towel for the day, so I consider it a victory! I heard an interview recently with Geneen Roth and she said focus on what you have, not what you don't have. Focus on what went well and acknowledge that inner voice that beats you up, then let it go.
  • SmithsonianEmpress
    SmithsonianEmpress Posts: 1,163 Member
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    jyoung3507 wrote: »
    I had the same issue - I went out last night and had a few beers. But I ate well all day and had a light dinner so at the end of the day I felt good. Usually if I slip like that I just throw in the towel for the day, so I consider it a victory! I heard an interview recently with Geneen Roth and she said focus on what you have, not what you don't have. Focus on what went well and acknowledge that inner voice that beats you up, then let it go.

    <3 this!!!
  • Zipbsky
    Zipbsky Posts: 99 Member
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    Hi Everyone!

    I'm wondering if anyone ever feels this way and how they deal with it? Guilt over eating certain foods is definitely a problem for me so any advice or helpful tips is appreciated! :smile:
    Tell yourself (and believe it) that it is ok to eat foods that you enjoy. What's important is that you stayed within your calorie goal. Ultimately, this is a lifestyle change and it will be infinitely harder to maintain your new weight if you have to constantly deprive yourself of tasty food.

  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 951 Member
    edited January 2018
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    jyoung3507 wrote: »
    Usually if I slip like that I just throw in the towel for the day, so I consider it a victory! I heard an interview recently with Geneen Roth and she said focus on what you have, not what you don't have. Focus on what went well and acknowledge that inner voice that beats you up, then let it go.
    Geneen Roth is so on point! Thanks for this share; it reminds me to read some of her stuff again. I took a workshop with her once and it was really wonderful.


    Zipbsky wrote: »
    Hi Everyone!

    I'm wondering if anyone ever feels this way and how they deal with it? Guilt over eating certain foods is definitely a problem for me so any advice or helpful tips is appreciated! :smile:
    Tell yourself (and believe it) that it is ok to eat foods that you enjoy. What's important is that you stayed within your calorie goal. Ultimately, this is a lifestyle change and it will be infinitely harder to maintain your new weight if you have to constantly deprive yourself of tasty food.

    ^ Yes!
  • YAJ3507
    YAJ3507 Posts: 41 Member
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    jyoung3507 wrote: »
    Usually if I slip like that I just throw in the towel for the day, so I consider it a victory! I heard an interview recently with Geneen Roth and she said focus on what you have, not what you don't have. Focus on what went well and acknowledge that inner voice that beats you up, then let it go.
    Geneen Roth is so on point! Thanks for this share; it reminds me to read some of her stuff again. I took a workshop with her once and it was really wonderful.


    The interview was with Oprah Winfrey on Super Soul Sunday. You can listen to the podcast version if you don't have OWN. I love Oprah. :smile:

  • spdaphne
    spdaphne Posts: 262 Member
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    Guilt around food is interesting. Over Xmas, I did pretty well eating but Xmas eve and day, I went kinda off. I had been aiming to lessen the amount of dairy and gluten I had, but I ended up with clam chowder and my future mother-in-law's because I didn't have much else to eat aside from salad. My stomach felt kinda funny after and I don't know what combo of food it was, but my body the next morning was working through some stuff.

    I then ended up eating a number of gluten free, dairy free cookies that i made which were soooo damn good. It kept me from eating the gluten tasty cookies I made for everyone else. I felt kinda bad about eating them, but I also know I don't eat cookies very often.

    This past Friday I had been craving donuts (I rarely eat them) and I went to the donut shop down the street and got 2 donuts and 6 donut holes and ate them within 3 hours. There's a part of me that was like I shouldn't be eating it, but I know I don't eat it very often. I've learned in generally if I eat stuff I rarely do, I want it to be good. I want it to be worth it. That way, at least I know I am satisfying whatever craving I'm having and then I don't feel so bad.

    It also helps me finding healthier versions of things that I like and baking/making it. I also feel that I have a hard time eating some processed stuff now, especially if I know it's super sugary, etc. And I also am more weary about ordering items I know I may not feel so good after. I don't always refrain from eating it, but I think twice.

    In short, it's a process. Accept that you're human and we all give in to cravings from time to time. And as someone else said, pay attention to your emotions. I've also learned my cravings get all crazy if I have a non-balanced breakfast (carb, protein and fat) and I'm off the rest of the day craving sugar, carbs and over eating. The more unbalanced, the more likely you'll crave sugary, salty, high calorie, etc., foods.
  • SmithsonianEmpress
    SmithsonianEmpress Posts: 1,163 Member
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    I’d LOVE to learn how to make healthy donuts because I really like them. I’m feeling bad for having one today and yesterday .... well actually I’m not at this very second but come Monday I will be :s
  • cxwhit3
    cxwhit3 Posts: 293 Member
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    So I went out to lunch with a friend yesterday and chose what I thought was the healthiest option (mahi-mahi tacos). I did ask for a nutrition pamphlet but they didn’t have one. I don’t know what got triggered but I was starving for the rest of the day. In the evening I ate a pecan roll (probably about 600 calories). This broke my 17 day no sugar streak and I’m pretty mad at myself. BUT, since I woke totally bloated and a little headachey, I got what I deserved. I could rationalize this by saying that I was just using my earned exercise calories but I won’t. What I did learn from this experience is that I don’t like undoing what I’ve accomplished the last three weeks, nor do I like this bloated feeling. I’m not going to feel guilty just file this under lessons learned and proceed with renewed determination!
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