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I am new at MFP. May I introduce myself, please?
TheWaistBasket
Posts: 56 Member
I gained 126 lbs over the last 4 years ..and I just let it happen. All of a sudden the weight just jumped on me..slowly but steady. I didn't understand...my eating habits didn't change, so what was going on. It's called Menopause H*E*L*L. My system changed, my body changed...I was beside myself. My eating habits did change, but I was in denial.
Then I decided to give up smoking. I smoked for 15 years and decided that's enough. I quit 24 months ago. This is something only an ex-smoker will understand. You quit smoking and you live in the refrigerator or at least close by! I read up on it and it's normal but just really bad if you are already overweight. They say "don't worry about it" you can take care of the weight later. Later never came. I gained 38 lbs when I quit smoking. My metabolism was dead and let's not talk about non-existing bowel movements (they joke that it comes back after 2 months and it wasn't a joke).
I don't have eating spells anymore, I don't need candy anymore to overcome cigarette craving. So I am a fat ex-smoker now and I HATE IT.
Then Covid came along! Working at home. A dream. No bra, sweatpants, food deliveries to my home morning, lunch and evening. They know me by name. Every new restaurant got me excited and there were many. Others used the quarantine time to lose weight, I ate myself happy and happier. I gained 80 pounds in one year. I ate...I ate and loved it.
***Warning -don’t read if you are sensitive***
I have a hard time walking across the street. I can’t stand for long. I have a hard time in the shower. I can’t clean myself. I can't reach certain areas. It's embarrassing. Monday night I went online and looked for help, a tool that would help me to wipe myself and when I read the reviews and looked at the pictures it all sunk in.
I found a page full of morbidly obese people and realized I am one of them. I made it from 235 pounds to 270 +/- when I gave up smoking and last night I weighed in at 361. I watched an episode of MY 600 LBS LIFE and it grossed me out. I am like them, just not as heavy. I will be one of them if I don’t stop now.
As of right now, I am going on a very strict diet for four weeks. Why? Because I need success really fast, I know myself. 5 or 10 lbs off my weight would motivate me for months. I met with a dietician today. She made my head spin in a good way.
I closed my door dash account. I signed up for grocery delivery and ordered for vegetables, fruits, lean meat. I need to start to cook my meals. I also got a food scale. Grocery orders strictly by my meal plan, no extras. I have no plan but a goal. I am either going to stop now or this will go on and I will be housebound. Laying in bed like the people in the TV show. There is not much difference between me and them. I have to sit down when I cook. My ankles are swollen. I am already them.
I found some friends here and someone suggested this group. I thought I am the biggest one here and feel better now. I know I won't have to be alone on my journey.
I can’t work out but will try to walk in the house now. I am older, but not old enough to change. It's time.
Then I decided to give up smoking. I smoked for 15 years and decided that's enough. I quit 24 months ago. This is something only an ex-smoker will understand. You quit smoking and you live in the refrigerator or at least close by! I read up on it and it's normal but just really bad if you are already overweight. They say "don't worry about it" you can take care of the weight later. Later never came. I gained 38 lbs when I quit smoking. My metabolism was dead and let's not talk about non-existing bowel movements (they joke that it comes back after 2 months and it wasn't a joke).
I don't have eating spells anymore, I don't need candy anymore to overcome cigarette craving. So I am a fat ex-smoker now and I HATE IT.
Then Covid came along! Working at home. A dream. No bra, sweatpants, food deliveries to my home morning, lunch and evening. They know me by name. Every new restaurant got me excited and there were many. Others used the quarantine time to lose weight, I ate myself happy and happier. I gained 80 pounds in one year. I ate...I ate and loved it.
***Warning -don’t read if you are sensitive***
I have a hard time walking across the street. I can’t stand for long. I have a hard time in the shower. I can’t clean myself. I can't reach certain areas. It's embarrassing. Monday night I went online and looked for help, a tool that would help me to wipe myself and when I read the reviews and looked at the pictures it all sunk in.
I found a page full of morbidly obese people and realized I am one of them. I made it from 235 pounds to 270 +/- when I gave up smoking and last night I weighed in at 361. I watched an episode of MY 600 LBS LIFE and it grossed me out. I am like them, just not as heavy. I will be one of them if I don’t stop now.
As of right now, I am going on a very strict diet for four weeks. Why? Because I need success really fast, I know myself. 5 or 10 lbs off my weight would motivate me for months. I met with a dietician today. She made my head spin in a good way.
I closed my door dash account. I signed up for grocery delivery and ordered for vegetables, fruits, lean meat. I need to start to cook my meals. I also got a food scale. Grocery orders strictly by my meal plan, no extras. I have no plan but a goal. I am either going to stop now or this will go on and I will be housebound. Laying in bed like the people in the TV show. There is not much difference between me and them. I have to sit down when I cook. My ankles are swollen. I am already them.
I found some friends here and someone suggested this group. I thought I am the biggest one here and feel better now. I know I won't have to be alone on my journey.
I can’t work out but will try to walk in the house now. I am older, but not old enough to change. It's time.
6
Replies
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Welcome @TheWaistBasket. You have found a great place. And you have already made some very major steps! Congratulations. There will be people stopping by with some great advice for your - I look forward to seeing you around.
P.S. I quit smoking almost 5 years ago now - managed to gain 85 pounds. I've lost those babies this past year and a bit more. And WOW....does it feel good. I have the feeling you'll do it too. If you can quit smoking - you can do this.1 -
Another welcome to Larger Losers!....you have come to a great group...some of us are new and some have been here awhile....we all have had or have a lot of weight to lose!...jump in any post and feel free to participate in discussions...we share a lot here....ask questions and get involved....no questions are silly!...
I have never smoked but I sure can eat!....
Sounds like you are making some really big changes in your lifestyle!...don’t punish yourself or make this too hard....eating healthy should not be a punishment or deprivation.....
Read through some of the old posts here...lots of good information....if you need help with calories or meal planning, etc...someone in this group is always ready to help!
Hope you join in!
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So I challenged your biggest and alone concept. Very glad to see that you're willing to consider that current perception doesn't always constitute the totality of reality, and that adjusting one's perception is often worthwhile!
You haven't sinned or committed a crime by become obese. You don't HAVE to expiate your sins and you don't have to suffer and pay for your transgressions in order to make changes.
I sense more than a bit of loathing or self anger in how you're talking about yourself. And this can lead you to make things difficult for yourself instead of truly taking stock of where you are, where you want to be, and making incremental changes that will take you to the new place and keep you there.
You have time. Lots of time. Nothing but time. Because time will pass no matter what.
Take stock of where you are today. Log. Make changes you're willing to make long term. Start from the "easy money"
It only took a week of logging for me to decide that I would gladly trade three spoonfuls of olive oil for an extra can of salmon. And that subway subs were truly not worth their calories for me as their existed much more filling alternatives for the same calories. I still eat the occasional subway sub... I just don't consider them to be magical diet food! It was several months in that I decided that I cared about how many vegetables and fruits I consumed.
So, engage in an appreciable deficit... but don't over-do it. Attempting excessive deficits is the #1 reason for failed attempts at "dieting" in my personal opinion.
Plus you *and most of use starting from similar positions* more than need the time of weight loss both to experiment with different food options and to examine and expand our daily activities to include more "stuff" that promotes a normal weight and less stuff that promotes excess weight... and to also sort out any quantity of daily habits as well as mental garbage that may be affecting our way of eating and our weight.
You're not starting on a one year plan to lose a lot of weight fast. You're starting on a minimum five year weight management plan. Renewable.
And almost seven and a half years into mine I can assure you that it is eminently worthwhile to continue to be engaged. Sometimes more. Sometimes less. But active engagement to continue to achieve weight management. Which obviously requires finding enjoyment in being able to stick to the process that bring the results one wants to achieve. Which would be hard to do if things were punishing instead of mostly enjoyable!5 -
@PAV8888 - I'll cook you up a wonderful melange with all the sriracha in the world for those words that deserve an "all of the above" responses - not just "inspiring".2
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Consider that the goal is not to lose weight. That is a bonus prize. Consider that the goal is to eat the right amount of food (food energy) most of the time. This is similar to saying that a money budget goal is simply to stay within the budget. Sounds kind of like a mature thing to do, right? The war on my immaturity rages on but I am winning most of the battles while only losing a few skirmishes here and there. As a result I am down more than 250 pounds.
In a money budget the goal is to spend slightly less so you can save some of it, right? In a weight loss situation the goal is to spend most of your calories and save some for your deficit. This is why I often refer to calories like money.
If I told you I was going to do an endurance walk of 250 miles but because I need some motivation I am going to run as hard and fast as I can for the first 10 miles, what would your advice be?
The faster you go, the more strict you go, the faster you will run into- Grief
- Feeling Deprived
- Strained Willpower
- Demand for More Motivation and More Scale Results
The more normal it feels the less you will grieve all the food freedom you are giving up. There will be moments you will feel deprived but why make that all day, every day? You only have so much willpower and if you use it making what should be normal days harder what happens when you hit a hard day? The scale is an absolutely horrible motivator. At first you will likely drop some weight fast but then the scale will start fluctuating up and down and you may have to go weeks between new low weights. I often wait 3 weeks between new low weights. One time I had to wait 7 weeks. 7 weeks of continuing to do the right thing while the scale was UP not going down. Eventually the scale caught up with all the weight I should have been losing the entire time.
You can absolutely lose a life changing amount of weight. I did it. I did it by being kind to myself. Allowing treats that fit in my calorie budget and by knowing when to take my foot off the gas. I did not do it perfectly. I made many mistakes... I still do... but none of them were enough to do any lasting damage. If you create an avalanche of good decisions the occasional bad ones will get buried.8 -
Man, while reading the first post I was quietly muttering "same, same, yeah that's me, oh wow, same" from start to finish.
ARE YOU MY LONG LOST SISTER???
Welcome to larger losers. A year ago or so I was in a similar situation that you are now. I was a 40yo 392lbs fat ex-smoker, thoroughly disgusted with myself and wanting to change asap.
This is a great community, feel free to participate as much as you can. NovusDies and PAV8888 are veterans in this, I have gained a ton of knowledge and insight about myself from simply reading their contributions. But everyone here has something to add, a personal experience to share and reflect on, a fresh perspective to help you think out of the box and attack the problem from a new angle. So fire away, and good luck on the start of your new life.
If I can offer a small bit of feedback myself, it would be to try and find the easiest/kindest way possible to do this. This is a marathon, not a sprint, and we really did not suddenly gain this weight we have. It took years of "dedication and commitment" to over-eating. It is only natural then that it will take a good chunk of time to shed off.
And that's fine. Really! Time is going to pass whatever we may do with it, and we are going to have to eat each and every day. Until we die. So, speed is not of the essence. Perseverance is. Even small changes over a long enough time can and do lead in big results, one way or the other (we have seen at least one way, right?). So, a good idea would be to view this as a science project of sorts. Trying to make a slighttttttly better version of yourself each day that passes would be enough to exact enormous, life changing improvement over time.
Let's do this!
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@conniewilkins56 bumped a thread today which has a totally apropos graphic description of part of what we're all touching on. The power of the continuous application of incremental effort.
Sure. Real life may not yield 37.7.... but small changes consistently implemented will go a long long way towards it.
Look for a post and graphic by @papayahed in this thread:
https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10767669/general-discussion-about-weight-loss-health-habits-exercise-mindset-and-similar#21 -
Welcome!2
