Leashes for Kids

rml_16

Just curious how many of the people that "dont like leashes" actually have children.

Agreed.

If a kid isn't being physically or emotionally or sexually abused, it's none of my business what a parent does to keep him or herself sane.

BrettPGH

Like others have said, as long as folks are using it as a "tool" and not to "tether them in the back yard".....

Wait that's not cool? Really?

TheRoadDog

I want to get one for my wife.

_SusieQ_

Now I remember why I don't come into this group more. I thought this was a place for reasonable and adult discussion, but there sure is a lot of sniping and back biting going on. Sheesh.

UsedToBeHusky

Y'all can nail me to the cross for this one if you want, but it seems to me that leashes give parents the opportunity to be lazy, and pay less attention to their kids. Just my opinion.

Again, I have two kids and did not use leashes with either. I won't say I didn't consider, but in the long run, it wasn't for me and mine.

fbmandy55

It's not really even about controlling your kids or having strong discipline. I mean I lay down the law with my little girl. I'm way more authoritative than I ever thought I would be in my life. I just worry, you know?

She's an amazing kid and always listens and has never been a discipline problem. She knows to stay by my side and I've never had to worry about her.

Except one day. For some reason she darted out into the middle of a parking lot in front of an SUV barrelling down on her. I had a heart attack and had to lunge to grab her. One of the biggest scares of my life.

Why? There was a straw in the road and she wanted to grab it. Lesson? Kids are stupid and unpredictable. Even the best ones. At that moment I would have loved to have had a leash on my "perfect, obedient" daughter.

Ditto. My son is usually perfect, stays by me, doesn't run off and one day we were walking out of a gas station and he took off running into the parking lot (even though we were right off the sidewalk in front) and I about died. Now I just make sure we are holding hands when we walk outside anywhere.

The leash is not for me. I'm not going to look down upon a parent who uses one... I may laugh at their kid a bit though!

PlanetVelma

Like others have said, as long as folks are using it as a "tool" and not to "tether them in the back yard".....

Wait that's not cool? Really?

:laugh:

DieVixen

I dont think ive ever used one on my kids,maybe if they were closer in age. Usually the mothers I see using them have 2 to 3 little ones. I only had to focus on one at a time.


I do have a leash my husband walks me on sometimes. It goes over real well in small town TX:laugh:

fbmandy55

I do have a leash my husband walks me on sometimes. It goes over real well in small town TX:laugh:

:drinker:

UsedToBeHusky

I dont think ive ever used one on my kids,maybe if they were closer in age. Usually the mothers I see using them have 2 to 3 little ones. I only had to focus on one at a time.


I do have a leash my husband walks me on sometimes. It goes over real well in small town TX:laugh:

Bwahahaha!

My kids are four years apart so maybe that is why I never found it necessary.

BondBomb

I dont think ive ever used one on my kids,maybe if they were closer in age. Usually the mothers I see using them have 2 to 3 little ones. I only had to focus on one at a time.


I do have a leash my husband walks me on sometimes. It goes over real well in small town TX:laugh:

Bwahahaha!

My kids are four years apart so maybe that is why I never found it necessary.

This is why I am seriously considering whether or not I want a second kid. At my age I would have to do it pretty soon. But 4 years apart is perfect! When I have my nephew (8 months) and my son (20 months) I seriously feel like a crazy person. I can wipe puke off of one and then the next one is wiping poop on me! And yeah they 'get away' in a matter of seconds.

UsedToBeHusky

I dont think ive ever used one on my kids,maybe if they were closer in age. Usually the mothers I see using them have 2 to 3 little ones. I only had to focus on one at a time.


I do have a leash my husband walks me on sometimes. It goes over real well in small town TX:laugh:

Bwahahaha!

My kids are four years apart so maybe that is why I never found it necessary.

This is why I am seriously considering whether or not I want a second kid. At my age I would have to do it pretty soon. But 4 years apart is perfect! When I have my nephew (8 months) and my son (20 months) I seriously feel like a crazy person. I can wipe puke off of one and then the next one is wiping poop on me! And yeah they 'get away' in a matter of seconds.

My best friend had her two kids back-to-back. She has been single with them since her daughter was born. It is frustrating for her, but at the same time, she has never used a leash on hers either. I think it is just about what you are comfortable with.

BondBomb

I dont think ive ever used one on my kids,maybe if they were closer in age. Usually the mothers I see using them have 2 to 3 little ones. I only had to focus on one at a time.


I do have a leash my husband walks me on sometimes. It goes over real well in small town TX:laugh:

Bwahahaha!

My kids are four years apart so maybe that is why I never found it necessary.

This is why I am seriously considering whether or not I want a second kid. At my age I would have to do it pretty soon. But 4 years apart is perfect! When I have my nephew (8 months) and my son (20 months) I seriously feel like a crazy person. I can wipe puke off of one and then the next one is wiping poop on me! And yeah they 'get away' in a matter of seconds.

My best friend had her two kids back-to-back. She has been single with them since her daughter was born. It is frustrating for her, but at the same time, she has never used a leash on hers either. I think it is just about what you are comfortable with.

Agreed. I don't actually own a leash. And to be honest I am not the kind of person that would take criticism of my parenting skills from total stranger in a 'nice way'. Or even a civil way for that matter.
I am simply not a fan of the 'control your kids' comments. (I know that wasn't you). But if the leash is how I control my kid then so be it. But some children are hyper, easily distracted...or just babies! My son started walking an 8 months. Eight freaking months. The only way to be controlled at that age is to be held. And trying to hold a new toddler in every sitiuation can be challenging. They want to walk...and they want to wander. I seriously don't think that warrants the snippy remarks about parenting skills.

california_peach

I've never used one for my kids, but with my oldest I considered it. He was always very hard to control and he would run away from me at break neck speeds. Hell, I tore my ACL trying to stop him from running into the path of an industrial mower when he was about 18 months old. Luckily with that incident he stopped the running away thing. I think the sight of me on crutches are more fun then running away. He was diagnosed with autism around age 4, so much of his behavior from that time period makes more sense, but man at the time it was hard.

As far as I am concerned, you gotta do what you gotta do as a parent to keep you child safe, and I am not about to judge someone else for the choices they make as parents. I know many parents of children on the spectrum who do use things like leashes as it came be difficult to discipline an autistic child. It keeps the kid safe, so I am all for that.

ThePhoenixRose

i wouldn't use them, but there have been days where i wish i did have one! My 4 year old, STILL, doesn't seem to think he can be hurt. He ran into a parking lot not too long ago, rode his bike across the street, etc. He's "asserting his independence," i realize, but i'd much prefer it if he did that where it was safe!! I'm working on it...

Bahet

My oldest was born 20 years old. Seriously, that kid was never any problem. At 2 he was sharing his toys with other kids while other kids were in the "MINE!" phase. But I used a wrist leash with him whenever we were out. It wasn't "lazy parenting" or "not learning to control your child" it was because it was that or holding hands and holding hands is hard when there's an extreme height difference. He'd ASK for the leash when his arm would get tired from holding my hand.

You try it sometime. Stand with your arm above your head and see how long it takes before you're miserable. Now if your options were that or having a piece of material around your wrist which would you choose? I laugh at some of the people I've seen who call leashes degrading, say it's treating your child like a dog, etc. They are usually the ones holding hands with a screaming child who is being dragged across the floor. Of course the kid is screaming - all the blood has drained from his arm and he's miserable.

Kid 2 was a completely different person than kid 1. Kid 1 would throw a temper tantrum and I'd tell him I don't listen to tantrums but if he wants to talk I'll be in the next room. He'd get up, toddle over and say "O-tay mommy. I done crying now." Kid 2 would get up, go into the room I was in, throw himself on the floor and start wailing again. I'd go into another room and he'd do it again. And again and again and again and again. A few years ago I used to joke that Kid 1 was 11 going on 30 and Kid2 was 8 going on 5. If I didn't use a leash for Kid2 he'd have run off more times than I can count. It's not about "learn to control your kid". That's a silly thing to say and is obviously done by someone with no kids, 1 kid like Kid1 or someone who got really lucky and never had a runner. Kids don't come with an instruction manual. You can read all the parenting books you want but the #1 thing you'll find is that you might read them, but kids don't.

kennethmgreen

I have many years of direct childcare experience (all populations - from privileged kids to abused and neglected kids), and have raised two girls. Am raising, dammit. They are just 10 and 7. I have also owned, raised and trained many dogs. I'm a big believer in obedience training and am truly convinced it makes for a happier dog.

I'm a strong supporter of parents using whatever means necessary to do what they think is the right way to raise their child, provided they are not putting said child in danger. I support creativity and alternative parenting. I support a parent's right to purchase and use a leash for their toddler.

However, that does not mean I won't point and laugh. And judge you for being lazy. And feel bad for the kid.

Jorra

Inspired by this picture by any chance?

I have absolutely nothing against leashes or leashed backpacks for children. They are safe, especially in crowded areas.

_Timmeh_

I was never big on leashes for kids, mine hardly even left our side. I wouldn't dirty look someone for using them, I might giggle some :laugh:
Didn't need leashes when I was a kid, parents just smacked the *kitten* outta me if I wandered off. "why you crying...why you crying"
Now someone would report that as child abuse.

BrettPGH

Inspired by this picture by any chance?

I have absolutely nothing against leashes or leashed backpacks for children. They are safe, especially in crowded areas.

Hell with leashes. Get that woman a taser!

Bahet

How is it "lazy" to let your toddler walk around without having their arm stuck up in the air to hold your hand all the time? Leashes are no "lazier" than strollers or shopping carts for kids who can walk. Do you laugh and judge when you see a 3yo in a stroller too?

Goldenbast

I got one when my first child was very little when I had just turned my back for a SECOND and suddenly I heard my daughter screaming bloody murder as some crazy looking woman was forcibly dragging her away in the mall...I ran over and that woman had the audacity to smile at me and say her kid was being bratty....I grabbed my daughter and started screaming at the top of my lungs for security and she ran off.

My daughter hated the thing and once we got through the busy pier crowd to the end of the pier, I took it off her and when I wasn't looking she threw it over into the sea :bigsmile:

adrian_indy

I have a hyper active 3 and 1/2 year old and 1 and 1 1/2 year old. They run, cause trouble, scream when you don't want them too and jump. No matter how fustrated I get....I'm not putting a frickin leash on them. Reminds me too much of a dog. Besides, we are all here trying to lose weight, so if you you aren't in a wheel chair, try chasing down the kids. Great for buring calories.

mommared53

Yeah, real easy to chase after a child when you're walking several blocks home from the grocery store carrying a bunch of heavy bags of groceries and trying not to drop anything. <<< insert sarcasm here.

adrian_indy

I'm really glad you wrote "inssert sarcasm", because I would have never understood your ****ty tone. I never knew parenting was supposed to be easy. It it's about ease, might I suggest a shock collar for the child, or maybe a choke chain. Neither are permanently damaging and can provide excellent obedience.

MikeSEA

I'm really glad you wrote "inssert sarcasm", because I would have never understood your ****ty tone. I never knew parenting was supposed to be easy. It it's about ease, might I suggest a shock collar for the child, or maybe a choke chain. Neither are permanently damaging and can provide excellent obedience.

Well thank god you took that to a useless hyperbolic place, otherwise you might have gotten away with not sounding pissy.

adrian_indy

I'm really glad you wrote "inssert sarcasm", because I would have never understood your ****ty tone. I never knew parenting was supposed to be easy. It it's about ease, might I suggest a shock collar for the child, or maybe a choke chain. Neither are permanently damaging and can provide excellent obedience.

Well thank god you took that to a useless hyperbolic place, otherwise you might have gotten away with not sounding pissy.

Hyperbolic? I don't understand. If I was using hyperbole, I would have said "insert hyperbolic scenario". Besides, it's a valid point. If all that matters is making it easier to manage our children, explain to me why we can't use choke collars. All it does is apply an uncomfortable pressure to the throat the harder they pull. No bruising or scratching. Or how about a gentle leader. That would be perfect if a choke chain made you uncomforable. Just wrap it around their face and everytime they pull against the leash, they turn their own head.

mommared53

I'm really glad you wrote "inssert sarcasm", because I would have never understood your ****ty tone. I never knew parenting was supposed to be easy. It it's about ease, might I suggest a shock collar for the child, or maybe a choke chain. Neither are permanently damaging and can provide excellent obedience.

You said, ". . . so if you you aren't in a wheel chair, try chasing down the kids." My point was it's hard to chase down kids if you're carrying a bunch of bags of groceries and trying not to drop any. I never said parenting was supposed to be easy but I don't see why it's so bad to try to keep kids safe by using a product like the one shown that is made specificially for children. I used a playpen and a gate to keep my kids in one place when they were little. Is that inhumane too because I was treating them like dogs by keeping them penned up?

Edited for spelling.

adrian_indy

I'm really glad you wrote "inssert sarcasm", because I would have never understood your ****ty tone. I never knew parenting was supposed to be easy. It it's about ease, might I suggest a shock collar for the child, or maybe a choke chain. Neither are permanently damaging and can provide excellent obedience.

You said, ". . . so if you you aren't in a wheel chair, try chasing down the kids." My point was it's hard to chase down kids if you're carrying a bunch of bags of groceries and trying not to drop any. I never said parenting was supposed to be easy but I don't see why it's so bad to try to keep kids safe by using a product like the one shown that is made specificially for children. I used a playpen and a gate to keep my kids in one place when they were little. Is that inhumane too because I was treating them like dogs by keeping them penned up?

Edited for spelling.

No, it's not inhumane. I'm just concerned that you are not going far enough. If you are using dog equipment like a leash for children, I think it would benefit delving into dog psychology and training methods. Some breeds are just harder to train than others. My American Bulldog was trainable enough that I could walk him without a leash. But some of these children sound like my English Bulldog, Jo-Jo. He was hard to train and still will not listen on a walk and positive reinforcement training did not take.

If all you are doing is putting the kid on a leash because they won't stay with you, where is the corrective training? If you are carrying groceries it can't be easy for the kid to be constantly jerking against the leash. Therefore I suggest the gentle leader. Buy the one made specifically for Bulldogs. They have a shorter muzzle and will most closely resemble the size of a childs head. It stands to reason that the child will eventually reach an age where he/she is not always in your company, and you don't want Tin Tin running off the school yard into traffic. The down side is that the gentle leader is going to look lighly like a Hannibal Lecter mask, but this is a childs safety we are talking about. Try using it for a couple of weeks, then go down to the regular leash. Keep the slack short and make the child walk by your side. I would say withing a few months you can try unleashing the child.

Bahet

I used a wrist leash for my kids. People use leashes for dogs. I feed my kids. People feed dogs. Sometimes thy even eat out of bowls! I clean up after my kids. People clean up after dogs. Sometimes my kids slept in bed with us. Sometimes dogs sleep in bed with their people. Oh the humanity! or should I say caninity?

Using a leash isn't about being lazy or making it easy to control them or 1 step below throwing a stick and yelling "Fetch!" (although we did throw a ball around wit them! OMG What have I done??) It's about keeping them safe, giving them some room to explore without wandering away, and as I said a few times now, it's much easier on the kid than holding their tiny arms in the air and keeping them glued to your side. And again I ask, is it lazy parenting to put a chil who can walk in a stroller?