A few things ladies need to know and accept
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:laugh:
Pfffft. That's all I have to say about that... LolIt is the bad boy that attracts .. but the nice guy that keeps her.
A word of warning for men:
"never listen to a woman for dating advice"
Just kidding...
Or am I?
I think the misunderstanding is on the meaning each sex gives to "bad boys" and "nice guys". Can't be too nice to keep a girl though.0 -
It is the bad boy that attracts .. but the nice guy that keeps her.
Pfffft. That's all I have to say about that... Lol
EXPLAIN YOURSELF!!!! lo!!!0 -
It is the bad boy that attracts .. but the nice guy that keeps her.
Pfffft. That's all I have to say about that... Lol
EXPLAIN YOURSELF!!!! lo!!!
It is a conundrum and begging for someone to be a phony except they won`t be in the way you wish.
The bad guy with a nice edge will prove himself to be a bad guy that is an *kitten*.0 -
It is the bad boy that attracts .. but the nice guy that keeps her.
Pfffft. That's all I have to say about that... Lol
EXPLAIN YOURSELF!!!! lo!!!
It is a conundrum and begging for someone to be a phony except they won`t be in the way you wish.
The bad guy with a nice edge will prove himself to be a bad guy that is an *kitten*.
Do you really think that Carl?0 -
It is the bad boy that attracts .. but the nice guy that keeps her.
Pfffft. That's all I have to say about that... Lol
EXPLAIN YOURSELF!!!! lo!!!
It is a conundrum and begging for someone to be a phony except they won`t be in the way you wish.
The bad guy with a nice edge will prove himself to be a bad guy that is an *kitten*.
Do you really think that Carl?
In the context that I took your statement yes but perhaps I misunderstood what you meant.
Were you talking about one and the same,some one that comes on like a "bad boy" but really is nice or entirely different people where the bad one gets attention but lifes lessons teaches a lady not to act on it?
If the latter is the case then my statement doesn`t apply but if the former I think it is likely true.0 -
I want this:
A nice guy who says NO. A nice guy who knows boundaries, both for himself and for me. A nice guy who can be sarcastic and funny. A nice guy who is a gentleman. A nice guy who is respectable around my family and friends but can be wild with me in private. A nice guy who will fight for my honor if it ever needs. A nice guy who can make sweet gentle love to me one night and rough crazy sex on the counter the next..
Easy.
These nice guys that are pushovers.. they're the ones that will say YES to any and every request I have. I have had my share of those and honestly, I know I can get my way. It's sad but true. I like it at the moment but everytime he says YES YES YES, I lose an ounce of respect (I'm not talking about doing nice gestures for me) for him.
I told Smiley early on that that was something I was looking for in a man. A man that can say NO to me, that can challenge me and can put me in my place if I ever get out of it. We've butted heads several times.. I'm stubborn, so is he but the times he has told me NO, I've hated it at the moment but 15 minutes later when my head has cleared, I realize how nice it is to have a man that can speak for himself. I can say, I respect my Smily completely. He's my man. My MAN. Not a pushover. I've always had this sneaky evil side to me that laughed on the inside (I'm being completly raw here) when a guy would say yes to me, knowing I was pushing it. I don't mean to... but there's a reason why there are jokes about how women are nags or control freaks. Because most of us can be.
Granted, I'm into traditional roles mostly so this works for me and appeals to me.0 -
Now when I butt heads with ladies here you all just get mad at me. :frown:
:laugh:0 -
Scapez wants this:
JT....a nice guy who says NO. A nice guy who knows boundaries, both for himself and for her. A nice guy who can be sarcastic and funny. A nice guy who is a gentleman. A nice guy who is respectable around her family and friends but can be wild with me in private. A nice guy who will fight for her honor if it ever needs. A nice guy who can make sweet gentle love to her one night and rough crazy sex on the counter the next..:smokin: :drinker: :bigsmile: :laugh:0 -
I want this:
A nice guy who says NO. A nice guy who knows boundaries, both for himself and for me. A nice guy who can be sarcastic and funny. A nice guy who is a gentleman. A nice guy who is respectable around my family and friends but can be wild with me in private. A nice guy who will fight for my honor if it ever needs. A nice guy who can make sweet gentle love to me one night and rough crazy sex on the counter the next..
Easy.
These nice guys that are pushovers.. they're the ones that will say YES to any and every request I have. I have had my share of those and honestly, I know I can get my way. It's sad but true. I like it at the moment but everytime he says YES YES YES, I lose an ounce of respect (I'm not talking about doing nice gestures for me) for him.
I told Smiley early on that that was something I was looking for in a man. A man that can say NO to me, that can challenge me and can put me in my place if I ever get out of it. We've butted heads several times.. I'm stubborn, so is he but the times he has told me NO, I've hated it at the moment but 15 minutes later when my head has cleared, I realize how nice it is to have a man that can speak for himself. I can say, I respect my Smily completely. He's my man. My MAN. Not a pushover. I've always had this sneaky evil side to me that laughed on the inside (I'm being completly raw here) when a guy would say yes to me, knowing I was pushing it. I don't mean to... but there's a reason why there are jokes about how women are nags or control freaks. Because most of us can be.
Granted, I'm into traditional roles mostly so this works for me and appeals to me.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANT!!!! I am the same way. If you let me .. I will run a mile with the inch you give me. I need someone that can play around with me and be a smart *kitten*. I can't handle all the serious mushy crap all day long. Its just not me. Not that I don't want that sometimes .. but all the time it gets to be so annoying.0 -
Now when I butt heads with ladies here you all just get mad at me. :frown:
:laugh:
Carl, have you not learned this yet...you can't argue with women and expect to win...the secret is to let them think they won and move on to the next topic.0 -
In the context that I took your statement yes but perhaps I misunderstood what you meant.
Were you talking about one and the same,some one that comes on like a "bad boy" but really is nice or entirely different people where the bad one gets attention but lifes lessons teaches a lady not to act on it?
If the latter is the case then my statement doesn`t apply but if the former I think it is likely true.
Ok .. I see what you are saying. I guess what I want/need is someone in the middle of the two men. lol.0 -
I could not agree more! If only I had thought to put it in those words!0
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I'm pms'ing so I'm hormonal here but I also love how boy'ish and adventurous Smiley is. Seeing him with his brothers wrestling, him going fishing at night with his other brother, swimming in the scary lake at night... mmm. I love it. Love the testosterone. Love that he loves the thrill of certain things like fishing, hunting, sports, etc... Love that he can do things without me.. even if I do sometimes pout about it (if I'm bored at home) because I rather him be cuddling with me.0
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Scapez wants this:
JT....a nice guy who says NO. A nice guy who knows boundaries, both for himself and for her. A nice guy who can be sarcastic and funny. A nice guy who is a gentleman. A nice guy who is respectable around her family and friends but can be wild with me in private. A nice guy who will fight for her honor if it ever needs. A nice guy who can make sweet gentle love to her one night and rough crazy sex on the counter the next..:smokin: :drinker: :bigsmile: :laugh:
You got a brother?0 -
Scapez wants this:
JT....a nice guy who says NO. A nice guy who knows boundaries, both for himself and for her. A nice guy who can be sarcastic and funny. A nice guy who is a gentleman. A nice guy who is respectable around her family and friends but can be wild with me in private. A nice guy who will fight for her honor if it ever needs. A nice guy who can make sweet gentle love to her one night and rough crazy sex on the counter the next..:smokin: :drinker: :bigsmile: :laugh:
You got a brother?
No sorry, I am an original!0 -
It is the bad boy that attracts .. but the nice guy that keeps her.
Not for everyone... I've always been attracted to the "nice guys." "Bad boy" types, and anyone that looks like a used car salesman scare me away.0 -
Maybe if all you get out of a relationship no matter who you are in it with is cheaters and liars and have never been proven wrong about how you see men, then maybe the problem is with you and the men you seek ou0
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In the context that I took your statement yes but perhaps I misunderstood what you meant.
Were you talking about one and the same,some one that comes on like a "bad boy" but really is nice or entirely different people where the bad one gets attention but lifes lessons teaches a lady not to act on it?
If the latter is the case then my statement doesn`t apply but if the former I think it is likely true.
Ok .. I see what you are saying. I guess what I want/need is someone in the middle of the two men. lol.
That was kind of my thinking,I can`t count the number of times I have read or heard over the years ladies that say "He is *insert random bad traits/actions* BUT he can be soooooooooooo sweet to me
"
No,he is either an *kitten* or decent unless some sort of split personality that needs therapy.
The lowest common denominator of behavior is the real person...maybe it is just being stubborn at times and that is not an issue but if meanness is an easy reaction then that is his/her character.0 -
Personally, I don't even care anymore. I don't think anyone will ever be what I want them to be ever. Maybe it is me and it is all my fault, but the reality of it is, I have never been happy in a relationship. I was always taking care of him, making sacrifices for him, making excuses for him. You can say its because I choose the wrong type of guy, but I don't buy that either since I extended myself to go out of my box for someone and still ended up with a steaming pile of crap! Maybe I just can't be satisfied in a relationship. Maybe honesty, loyalty, and commitment are too much to ask for. Again, don't tell me its the guys I choose because you don't know where I've been or the kind of relationships that I've had. I'm just plain tired of putting more in than I receive. A lifetime as a single is really not looking all that bad.0
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Now when I butt heads with ladies here you all just get mad at me. :frown:
:laugh:
Maybe they do... but I can guarantee overall, they see you as someone who's assertive and says what he thinks and believes.. not a pushover.
Just 2 nights ago.. I was having a crazy La_Amazona moment (AGAIN, I'm pms'ing) and I was a complete crazy ***** to Smiley (I even surprised myself!). He never budged, he kept saying NO to my request. I pushed and pushed and he kept to his word and though he pissed me off.. I fell asleep in his arms feeling SAFE. I felt horrible the next day and when he invited me over for steaks yesterday, I seriously thought he was going to talk to me about how evil I am and maybe break up with me.
He didn't bring it up so I did. We talked, he said "yeah you were kind of crazy last night". He made a joke or 2 about it and I grabbed him and told him I loved how he told me no. He pissed me off, yes but hot damn, he stood up to me and that night, probably ignited something in me for him that nobody ever has. I told him how I'm used to getting my way. I know how to work my magic/charm/nagging'ness/whatever... and although sometimes he can't resist me during certain requests, in serious matters, he's not afraid to say no to me. I kissed him then slapped his tush.
Oh Smiley!! :blushing: :bigsmile:0 -
Although I seriously want to know what the request was .. lol .. It is true that somone that can take a stand and not be walked on is all kinds of sexy. It is what gives off that .. ok .. here is someone that will take care of me. Someone that is strong enough to take care of me.
Carl .. that is exactly what you do when you argue and we get mad! lol .. you take a stand and we respect that!!!
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Although I seriously want to know what the request was .. lol .. It is true that somone that can take a stand and not be walked on is all kinds of sexy. It is what gives off that .. ok .. here is someone that will take care of me. Someone that is strong enough to take care of me.
Carl .. that is exactly what you do when you argue and we get mad! lol .. you take a stand and we respect that!!!
I'll never tell.. It was STUPID of me. I just wanted my way. He said he'll never let me live it down.0 -
I think the misunderstanding is on the meaning each sex gives to "bad boys" and "nice guys".
Very wise words.0 -
Maybe if all you get out of a relationship no matter who you are in it with is cheaters and liars and have never been proven wrong about how you see men, then maybe the problem is with you and the men you seek ou
Haha, that is exactly what I thought when I read that post!0 -
true that.0
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Personally, I don't even care anymore. I don't think anyone will ever be what I want them to be ever. Maybe it is me and it is all my fault, but the reality of it is, I have never been happy in a relationship. I was always taking care of him, making sacrifices for him, making excuses for him. You can say its because I choose the wrong type of guy, but I don't buy that either since I extended myself to go out of my box for someone and still ended up with a steaming pile of crap! Maybe I just can't be satisfied in a relationship. Maybe honesty, loyalty, and commitment are too much to ask for. Again, don't tell me its the guys I choose because you don't know where I've been or the kind of relationships that I've had. I'm just plain tired of putting more in than I receive. A lifetime as a single is really not looking all that bad.
"I was always taking care of him, making sacrifices for him, making excuses for him. I extended myself to go out of my box for someone" => THUS ended up with a steaming pile of crap (not still).
"Maybe honesty, loyalty, and commitment are too much to ask for." => Everyone (male or female) would want this with the person of their dream, even those men you offered this to, what I'm getting at is: if you didn't have enough of it (honesty, etc.), then clearly you weren't this other person's "best match"/dream.
Funny thing is I believe you when you say the man wasn't a bad person, however I understand that your relationship was bad:
Bad person (1 person) =/= Bad relationship (2 persons)
So it takes him AND you to fail a relationship. Not saying this is your fault, just pointing out that clearly something was happening that made him think being honest, loyal, committed with you wasn't worth it anymore (it could have been that his expectations from the relationship were too high, though, for example - or that he imagined it panning out differently).
He might end up being the best husband/man ever in a satisfying relationship for him. Sucks to hear I know, but that's why it's good to honestly reassess the relationship from time to time:
Am I still having pleasure in this relationship?0 -
move to VA! we can go biking together. there is a trail that goes from right outside DC to my town. W and O D trail. it's 90 miles round trip!
there is also the C and O trail! it's 185 miles long :-)
i need a biking partner!!!
She broke it off w/ me. No real reason, and I didn't really ask.
So, now I'm against relationships and I'm moving West sometime.0 -
i want wild and crazy, just like me, but totally trust worthy! i don't want to ever have to WONDER........ ya know? and he has to totally and completely respect me as an individual. i don't want to be told that my ideas or thoughts are dumb or small, or girly, or a waste of time, or that i have to defend them to him!!!
i find myself steering clear of alpha males. they have a hard time doing any of that! minus maybe wild and crazy. but if they don't trust me and constantly question ME, then it makes me distrust them! i like the beta guy, with just a touch of alpha, LOL! and that little bit can be reserved for just me, in private, or if i'm looking for some serious thrill time. :-)I want this:
A nice guy who says NO. A nice guy who knows boundaries, both for himself and for me. A nice guy who can be sarcastic and funny. A nice guy who is a gentleman. A nice guy who is respectable around my family and friends but can be wild with me in private. A nice guy who will fight for my honor if it ever needs. A nice guy who can make sweet gentle love to me one night and rough crazy sex on the counter the next..
Easy.
These nice guys that are pushovers.. they're the ones that will say YES to any and every request I have. I have had my share of those and honestly, I know I can get my way. It's sad but true. I like it at the moment but everytime he says YES YES YES, I lose an ounce of respect (I'm not talking about doing nice gestures for me) for him.
I told Smiley early on that that was something I was looking for in a man. A man that can say NO to me, that can challenge me and can put me in my place if I ever get out of it. We've butted heads several times.. I'm stubborn, so is he but the times he has told me NO, I've hated it at the moment but 15 minutes later when my head has cleared, I realize how nice it is to have a man that can speak for himself. I can say, I respect my Smily completely. He's my man. My MAN. Not a pushover. I've always had this sneaky evil side to me that laughed on the inside (I'm being completly raw here) when a guy would say yes to me, knowing I was pushing it. I don't mean to... but there's a reason why there are jokes about how women are nags or control freaks. Because most of us can be.
Granted, I'm into traditional roles mostly so this works for me and appeals to me.0 -
I think the problem is women in todays times are not like they were back then. In general, women are complex and hard to please today. It does suck for the nice guys out there because all they want to do is please and impress you. These guys are told and have hear women say things they want but in reality, its not what women want so they end up looking stupid, used in many cases, hurt, disrespected, and watch her touch some dudes p&nis who doesnt give a crap about her. It seems logical to treat women with respect, show them kindness, and romance her but in reality, it just doesnt work until she is older and has grown out of that stage or have been burned too many times. I think these guys need to forget what they think they know (times are different now) and know that the women also have to impress you, not just you trying to impress them. Have fun, be ballsy, spontaneous, outgoing, have your own mind, have a you want a women and not need one mentality, confident, go with the flow, dont over thing/talk about relationships, and be yourself but be a man.0
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It is not that I am looking for a bad boy/nice guy. I just want a guy that is a more of a man then I am.
I grew up a tom boy in the country. I was taught to survive on my own and know how to do the stereotypical "guy" things. I can use a hammer and nail, change my own tire, and grew up playing and talking sports. Not saying that I am not into girly things either, aka pedicures, clothes, scared of spiders etc. So a guy that has to call a handy man to do the small things around the house is a turn off. It seems there is a whole generation of guys my age (at least the ones I meet) that are the "Why do it myself when I can hire someone else to do it" era. I am also very assertive in my life outside of romantic relationships. I am not saying I am a ball buster but a guy needs a backbone to even be an interest to me. If I can walk all over you I will never be attracted to you. To many guys my age seem to think they are entitled to things and take too many things for granted. This might be why I am usually attracted to military guys or guys that grew up on farms. Both of those are very hard to find where I am currently living.0
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