BE Support Group Conversation Thread - 2012

IsMollyReallyHungry

How are you all doing? It is my hope you use this thread to get to know each other better and have a safe place to motivate & support one another daily. This group will be what you all make of it. So let's talk, support, share challenges, successes, and most of all share replases. We can all learn from one another. So please share, share, share. This group is what you make it so lets make it a place for all of us to get support.

One day at a time.:flowerforyou:
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mn145

I've been doing much better. I only had 2 binge days in June which considering my previous track record is awesome. I am taking a beach vacation with some friends and am worried about the aftershocks. I may eat poorly on the trip, but the real damage will come when I return and will binge alone at my house. It is my goal to avoid my trigger foods as much as possible while I am gone so that when I return I won't have a major relapse.

Behavior_Modification

Only 2 days in June is wonderful mn145!

I was at 10 but not dwelling. None were nearly as bad as they once were. I payed attention to my behavior. I logged every day, even though many were excruciating. On the days that I really don't want to log I sometimes pretend I am a scientist and I'm just documenting research on my eating-disordered subject. :laugh: Like that? I'm serious though. One of the coping strategies taught is to just observe, take note, and move on. So I try real hard to look from the outside in and think of it like data. It really is just data - numbers, statistics, entries. It has a lot less power too when I think of it as data instead of "all the crap I binged on".

Diane

emmab852012

I am a horrible Binge eater. This is one of my main problems that I have with weight loss. I could have an awesome day and eat right but as soon as I get off work and get home I feel the urges coming on and I just do it. I don't know exactly why I do it, I guess its a way of me winding down from work, or fulfilling my loneliness or because of the habit. I used to smoke cigarettes I quit about two years ago and I replaced that habit with Food. I come from an addict family who each have different addictions, mine is food. When I binge it is mostly junk food as I am a pretty picky eater.
I just signed up for this site today and I hope this will help put things in perspective once I see all the calories I am actually taking in.
I need to find something else I can replace this with, I was even considering started smoking just so I wouldn't eat as much. I know this was a stupid thought but I really need help.

anorangie

I am a horrible Binge eater. This is one of my main problems that I have with weight loss. I could have an awesome day and eat right but as soon as I get off work and get home I feel the urges coming on and I just do it. I don't know exactly why I do it, I guess its a way of me winding down from work, or fulfilling my loneliness or because of the habit. I used to smoke cigarettes I quit about two years ago and I replaced that habit with Food. I come from an addict family who each have different addictions, mine is food. When I binge it is mostly junk food as I am a pretty picky eater.
I just signed up for this site today and I hope this will help put things in perspective once I see all the calories I am actually taking in.
I need to find something else I can replace this with, I was even considering started smoking just so I wouldn't eat as much. I know this was a stupid thought but I really need help.

Hi emma,

When I joined MFP and started logging my food every day, I learned fairly quickly about how many calories I was consuming versus how many I thought I was consuming. And I decided to log everything, even binges, even though that can be difficult at times (well, every time tbh). Logging really helps me "see" more clearly and doesn't allow me to be in denial about my binges. Before I joined MFP, I wasn't facing the truth about my eating--that I was binging, sometimes a lot during especially stressful times, instead of acknowledging and dealing with my feelings. I easily minimized both the causes and effects of binging. I had been doing it so long, I had normalized it in my mind! Logging food is a good way to be honest with myself, and there is a level of personal accountability that I am benefiting from, too.

MFP helps me move more toward healthy thinking about food. But it's definitely a _process_.

I'm glad you joined; I think you'll find good support here. Remember to be both patient and gentle with yourself.

p.s. I encourage you to hold off on taking up smoking again if you can. I'm sure you quit for a reason, and you have that success under your belt already!

anorangie

Only 2 days in June is wonderful mn145!

I was at 10 but not dwelling. None were nearly as bad as they once were. I payed attention to my behavior. I logged every day, even though many were excruciating. On the days that I really don't want to log I sometimes pretend I am a scientist and I'm just documenting research on my eating-disordered subject. :laugh: Like that? I'm serious though. One of the coping strategies taught is to just observe, take note, and move on. So I try real hard to look from the outside in and think of it like data. It really is just data - numbers, statistics, entries. It has a lot less power too when I think of it as data instead of "all the crap I binged on".

Diane

This is an interesting way of looking at binges. I'm not familiar with the "observe, take note, and move on" coping strategy. I like the idea of observing and noting, and then _not_ obsessing.

Thanks for that.

Do you have any other coping strategies?

IsMollyReallyHungry

I've been doing much better. I only had 2 binge days in June which considering my previous track record is awesome. I am taking a beach vacation with some friends and am worried about the aftershocks. I may eat poorly on the trip, but the real damage will come when I return and will binge alone at my house. It is my goal to avoid my trigger foods as much as possible while I am gone so that when I return I won't have a major relapse.

Excellent job on June!! Keep up the good work and take one day at a time on your trip.

IsMollyReallyHungry

I am a horrible Binge eater. This is one of my main problems that I have with weight loss. I could have an awesome day and eat right but as soon as I get off work and get home I feel the urges coming on and I just do it. I don't know exactly why I do it, I guess its a way of me winding down from work, or fulfilling my loneliness or because of the habit. I used to smoke cigarettes I quit about two years ago and I replaced that habit with Food. I come from an addict family who each have different addictions, mine is food. When I binge it is mostly junk food as I am a pretty picky eater.
I just signed up for this site today and I hope this will help put things in perspective once I see all the calories I am actually taking in.
I need to find something else I can replace this with, I was even considering started smoking just so I wouldn't eat as much. I know this was a stupid thought but I really need help.

Welcome to MFP Emma and to the Binge Eating Support Group too! Tranferance of addictions is very common indeed and you are not stupid for thinking of going back to smoking. Going back to smoking will not solve your issues. Hang in there and MFP does work in many ways with this problem. I like Diane's post comparing our diaries to a sceintific project. Please continue to share. You are not alone.

IsMollyReallyHungry

I don't celebrate holidays but they are still hard for me because I am around the house. I really dread being around the house tomorrow. Perfect set up for a binge. I plan to stay busy but I am very worried about it but going to take it one hour at a time.

anorangie

I don't celebrate holidays but they are still hard for me because I am around the house. I really dread being around the house tomorrow. Perfect set up for a binge. I plan to stay busy but I am very worried about it but going to take it one hour at a time.

Staying busy is a good plan. If I can distract myself, or even give myself a few moments to just think before I eat by separating myself from food somehow, I can often avoid overeating. I wish you the best on Wednesday; you can do it--one hour at a time, just as you say.

IsMollyReallyHungry

I don't celebrate holidays but they are still hard for me because I am around the house. I really dread being around the house tomorrow. Perfect set up for a binge. I plan to stay busy but I am very worried about it but going to take it one hour at a time.

Staying busy is a good plan. If I can distract myself, or even give myself a few moments to just think before I eat by separating myself from food somehow, I can often avoid overeating. I wish you the best on Wednesday; you can do it--one hour at a time, just as you say.

Thanks!

Behavior_Modification

This is an interesting way of looking at binges. I'm not familiar with the "observe, take note, and move on" coping strategy. I like the idea of observing and noting, and then _not_ obsessing.

Thanks for that.

Do you have any other coping strategies?

You are very welcome. I will try to write about more strategies in the upcoming weeks. You can also google DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) to get some new ideas.

Denial is exactly where I am when I don't log my food. I am proud to say I found my way back once again in May and have logged every day since 5/1. Some days as I mentioned have been really difficult.

IsMollyReallyHungry

This is an interesting way of looking at binges. I'm not familiar with the "observe, take note, and move on" coping strategy. I like the idea of observing and noting, and then _not_ obsessing.

Thanks for that.

Do you have any other coping strategies?

You are very welcome. I will try to write about more strategies in the upcoming weeks. You can also google DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) to get some new ideas.

Denial is exactly where I am when I don't log my food. I am proud to say I found my way back once again in May and have logged every day since 5/1. Some days as I mentioned have been really difficult.

Good job Diane!!

Behavior_Modification

Another coping mechanism I try to remind myself of on a regular basis is treating myself like a friend. How would I talk to a friend if she had disordered eating behavior? What would I tell her if she asked for advice? How would I react if she shared a binge experience with me? How would I console her when she's upset about her ED behavior? How would I want her to feel about herself?

Why is it that we are so hard on ourselves? We are down right MEAN to ourselves sometimes. I know I am so guilty of this. I am usually brought to tears when someone brings it to my attention. Most recently it was my trainer, and she is so right, I am not nice to myself. I do need to be reminded..."BE NICE TO YOURSELF!" It's kinda silly to think that such an easy task can be so difficult. And even more ironic is that being nice is something I'm really good at....just not with myself apparently.

The expectations we make for ourselves are different than the expectations we have for other people. Why? Why are we more patient with other people than we are with ourselves? Logically that doesn't sound reasonable, yet we continue the behavior pattern.

Diane

IsMollyReallyHungry

That is so true!!

Behavior_Modification

A helpful way to modify our ED behavior is to practice eating in a healthy manner in front of other people, and practice allowing yourself to feel the emotions that accompany these actions. At first it might be really hard for some. But, really, is any of this easy? No.

IsMollyReallyHungry

Thanks Diane!

IsMollyReallyHungry

:flowerforyou: “If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results.” ~Jack Dixon:flowerforyou:

Behavior_Modification

:flowerforyou: “If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results.” ~Jack Dixon:flowerforyou:

That is so true, and precisely why dieting doesn't work for me. Dieting has me focusing on immediate results, not long term behavior changes.

kayakinggrrl

I know that disordered eating, especially binging is so similar to other addictions. I get frustrated though because unlike other addictions...alcohol, smoking, drugs...I can't just pour the booze down the drain or flush the cigarrettes and keep the triggering substance at a distance...there has to be some sort of food in the house and I still have to eat. I once heard food addiction described this way and I feel that it rings true every single day.

With some addictions like smoking or alcoholism, you get to put the tiger in a cage. The cage is still there every single day but with a food addiction, you have to go to the tiger's cage and open it up 3-4 times a day.

Behavior_Modification

With some addictions like smoking or alcoholism, you get to put the tiger in a cage. The cage is still there every single day but with a food addiction, you have to go to the tiger's cage and open it up 3-4 times a day.

..............On to my tiger taming lesson.....:laugh:

You are so right about this! Avoiding our triggers just like another addict is a major preventative measure. But what if you don't have specific foods that trigger and simply eating anything can be a trigger? I have times like that - where ANY food is a trigger.