Is there a time......

AnnaPixie

So to throw a question into the mix, sticking my foot in my mouth is one thing when I walk up to someone, but do women feed on confidence to the point that if someone seems a little shy/intimidated by them they just close the book on the spot? My confidence is getting better every day I push towards being more healthy but if I see someone who I think is gorgeous I can't help but be a bit intimidated by them, lol maybe I'm not cocky enough?

I think there's a fine balance here. I've been approached by guys in the street, in a pub, and my immediate thought is "he must do this to every woman he sees"! Thereby rendering me NOT special!! And then another part of kicks in and then I think "awww how brave of him, I must be SO special"

Go figure!! :huh:

AnnaPixie

Funnily enough, I'm way out of my comfort zone at the moment, and doing the pursuing. The response is favourable. But it still feels uncomfortable. I've been trying to figure out why for a few weeks now. Or, why not!

The more I hear that guys arent put off by it, the more I think it's worth trying. That's the main reason why a woman won't make the first more, it's because society tells us that men prefer the chase. And they are actually turned off by a woman that chases them. That and the rejection aspect, but as Carl and Florian said, men fear rejection too so perhaps we should grow some ovaries and deal with that one......lol!! No doubt, there ARE men out there that are turned off by an assertive woman, but how do you know if you dont try? This particular guy is worth the risk, for a variety of reasons.

wooo hooooo Anna! way to go :drinker:

haha!! Thanks PJ :flowerforyou:

Carl01

So to throw a question into the mix, sticking my foot in my mouth is one thing when I walk up to someone, but do women feed on confidence to the point that if someone seems a little shy/intimidated by them they just close the book on the spot? My confidence is getting better every day I push towards being more healthy but if I see someone who I think is gorgeous I can't help but be a bit intimidated by them, lol maybe I'm not cocky enough?

I think there's a fine balance here. I've been approached by guys in the street, in a pub, and my immediate thought is "he must do this to every woman he sees"! Thereby rendering me NOT special!! And then another part of kicks in and then I think "awww how brave of him, I must be SO special"

Go figure!! :huh:

Are you suggesting women are complicated? :noway:







:laugh:

AnnaPixie

So to throw a question into the mix, sticking my foot in my mouth is one thing when I walk up to someone, but do women feed on confidence to the point that if someone seems a little shy/intimidated by them they just close the book on the spot? My confidence is getting better every day I push towards being more healthy but if I see someone who I think is gorgeous I can't help but be a bit intimidated by them, lol maybe I'm not cocky enough?

I think there's a fine balance here. I've been approached by guys in the street, in a pub, and my immediate thought is "he must do this to every woman he sees"! Thereby rendering me NOT special!! And then another part of kicks in and then I think "awww how brave of him, I must be SO special"

Go figure!! :huh:

Are you suggesting women are complicated? :noway:







:laugh:

Good Lord, NO!! Perish the thought!!

TheKitsune6

So to throw a question into the mix, sticking my foot in my mouth is one thing when I walk up to someone, but do women feed on confidence to the point that if someone seems a little shy/intimidated by them they just close the book on the spot? My confidence is getting better every day I push towards being more healthy but if I see someone who I think is gorgeous I can't help but be a bit intimidated by them, lol maybe I'm not cocky enough?

I think there's a fine balance here. I've been approached by guys in the street, in a pub, and my immediate thought is "he must do this to every woman he sees"! Thereby rendering me NOT special!! And then another part of kicks in and then I think "awww how brave of him, I must be SO special"

Go figure!! :huh:

that's funny, neither of those things occur to me at all. My first thought is "Do I want this to continue?" and then behave in a way that will produce the outcome I want (Either, give him my number, or get him to go away)

flimflamfloz

I agree. But years of conditioning is taking a while to be undone. Women have been brought up to sit back and look pretty and let the guy make the moves.

I honestly have nothing against women being conditioned to ACT as they currently do and them not finding in themselves the courage to chase... This is perfectly acceptable, and only time can help to undo this, indeed.

However, I am more annoyed at women who THINK that they cannot "chase" men. This I disagree with. To me they are just making more excuses for not having the courage to "chase".

I also believe that women should be chasing with different methods (i.e. less direct method as opposed to men more direct approach). But they certainly are allowed to chase.

christine24t

So to throw a question into the mix, sticking my foot in my mouth is one thing when I walk up to someone, but do women feed on confidence to the point that if someone seems a little shy/intimidated by them they just close the book on the spot? My confidence is getting better every day I push towards being more healthy but if I see someone who I think is gorgeous I can't help but be a bit intimidated by them, lol maybe I'm not cocky enough?

I think there's a fine balance here. I've been approached by guys in the street, in a pub, and my immediate thought is "he must do this to every woman he sees"! Thereby rendering me NOT special!! And then another part of kicks in and then I think "awww how brave of him, I must be SO special"

Go figure!! :huh:

Agree!