why are you single?
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I am not particularly insecure or scared of a relationship, would love not to be single and think I have a lot to offer, but no idea how it will realistically happen.
I live in a small country where the number of good looking, educated and single women far outweigh single men. The men here are very spoilt because of the imbalance, and they would rather choose a gorgeous 25 year old over an independent 39 year old. Some women are ok with sharing the attention/guy but not me.
I DO get asked out but usually by much older or much younger, never in my age range! I like men in my age range!!
I tend to meet people through my travel for work but I'll never have more than a drink or a dinner through these meetings. Having said that, I am not adverse to a long distance relationship if I met the right person; unfortunately, I seem to have a special talent for becoming interested in the emotionally unavailable man.
I'm not perfect either, I am very set in my ways. Have done well for myself without the help of a man so not the best at spoiling a guy... yes I should work on that. I'm also visually a 6 in a land of 10's that can't help huh.... :frown:0 -
I have a hard time letting people in and it's often mistaken for being stuck up. Once I do let them in, I have high standards and I'm hard to keep up with. The ones who can overlook this will stick around. But I'm usually the one saying it's just not working. I'd rather be alone than waste time with someone I know it's not gonna work out with.
lol this sounds like me. the last guy i dated told me that he will not "bow down to me" just because of my looks :noway:
WTF? lol. i never asked him to. guess i came off as stuck up because I was being cautious and treading lightly. oh well..0 -
Great question, OP.
I'm single for a variety of reasons:
1 - I had a very bad marriage and it's hard to have a serious relationship after that experience. Once bitten, etc., etc.
2 - I travel like crazy. i'm on a plane every other week, on average. Good luck with that...
3 - When I'm not away on business, I try to spend as much time as possible with my two kids. They are 11 and 9, and need a lot of attention. I enjoy being with them, too. But it makes it difficult to make time for someone else.
4 - I live in the Czech Republic, but not in Prague. I have a small apartment in Prague, but I only use this when I'm working there. I live with my kids in a town in the north, very near the Czech/Polish/German border, about 90 min from Prague. There are fewer compatible women here. It's not just about the number of available women. Most educated women are living and working in Prague, because the salary levels there are so much higher for Czechs. All of the women I've dated since my divorce were from Prague, but that means I have at most 1 or 2 days a week when I'm there, max. It's just not possible to have a relationship under those conditions.
5 - I'm 45. It's hard to find a woman who isn't in a similar situation as I: divorced, children, limited time, etc. Younger women can't understand why I'm at hockey tournaments on weekends instead of with them - and I don't blame them... Women close to my age have their own kids and their own priorities.
6 - Living in a foreign country adds another layer of complexity. I speak Czech, it's not a language issue. It's more cultural. For example, I love to laugh, and I can be very sarcastic (hopefully not "cruel" sarcastic). In any case, it doesn't translate well.
7 - I'm probably unreasonable in what I desire from a woman. Too many contradictions within my "perfect" mate. Also, on a related note, I'm not a "normal" guy, and I think it's hard for women to understand who I am and what I want.
8 - I am a very friendly and social person (I swear!), but not until I get to know someone. I don't do well when I first meet people. I'm not very forward, and people take this for arrogance ("I guess he's not interested" etc. etc.). It makes it harder to meet people. I'm trying to work on this... Alcohol helps... :-)
9 - I have a bad habit of making numbered lists in my posts, which is a huge turn off for most women. :-)
I haven't really given up, but I'm not seriously looking for a girlfriend now. It's just too unlikely, given my constraints, and I don't want to start something when I don't have the time to do it properly.
--P
glad u can admit to #7.
u need to work on curing #9 - this is a big issue maybe the biggest problem LOL
and yes u can seem overly sarcastic and rude sometimes. just being honest.0 -
The place where you live sounds like heaven!I live in a small country where the number of good looking, educated and single women far outweigh single men. The men here are very spoilt because of the imbalance
Where do you live again?
I'm single probably because I don't want to commit...0 -
I'm single cause bruintamer doesn't live In Australia lol0
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I'm single because I cant stand the people in my area. Most of the guys and girls where I live are either Sluts, *kitten*, needy or feral. (I live in a wonderful place in-case you cant tell) You'll meet a decent looking guy and you'll find out he has a kid to some random chick and he dont even visit his kid or that he cheats on everyone, or he just wants in your pants. Dont even get me started on the girls. (Im bisexual In-case u cant tell)
then there's the thing with none of the guys in my area even looking the slightest bit like my type, there all either try-hard gangsters, dress like queer skaters or there butt *kitten* ugly. (Dont think Im shallow, I always go for personality before appearance. Its just hard to like someone when there wearing pants that show there *kitten* and a ridiculous hat) I go for normal dressing guys or punk guys...none around my area if you dont wanna include 40 year old men.
I NEED to get out of this town. . .0 -
I'm single cause bruintamer doesn't live In Australia lol
Or because you don't live in California!0 -
I'm single cause bruintamer doesn't live In Australia lol
Or because you don't live in California!
Touché sir touché0 -
Im single because I wanted to be in a monogamous relationship. That just seems so simple and easy but the men I meet dont want that at all.0
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Because I was married for 25 years, divorced 4 years ago and no one is interested in me.
i dont believe that no one is interested in u! and u definitely look way younger than ur age! are u lookin?
Yeah, I spent about 3 years on dating sites. They were all looking for Barbie....or quick sex.0 -
Yeah, I spent about 3 years on dating sites. They were all looking for Barbie....or quick sex.
Don't they all? LOL
I feel for yah.0 -
I'm single cause bruintamer doesn't live In Australia lol
Or because you don't live in California!
Touché sir touché
I must agree with Nerple. He is wise.0 -
Because my online profile wasn't appealing to women
(just kidding)
I am single becuase after a divorcing a cheating wife it took me a while to "trust" in women again and to believe in myself. I've had 2 girlfriends since my divorce and they didn't work out but I was out there trying. Right now I believe I am single because I have really just stopped looking and for now I am focused on some personal goals of weight loss and strenght training. I am not saying I woudn't go out if asked and if I bump into someone that is really cool I would probably ask them out. However, right now I am not out looking if I am not at the gym (in my apt building) I am at work or walking my dogs or at home watching TV. Once I reach some of my goals then I'll start going back out, joining some clubs, maybe a bowling league, venture in to the local gyms, and basically take my "online" flirting offline LOL0 -
Cause the judge.said "this divorce is granted". Such sweet words!
AMEN!!!!0 -
Right now I'm single because I choose to be. I'm focused on bettering myself at the moment.0
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Today probably isn't the best day for me to post on here.
I am single because:
I don't have a lot of time to date and will not let a man around my son until the relationship has gone somewhere.
Am very blunt about what I want and what I am looking for.
I am shy and can come off snobby.
I have been told I am intimidating.
I am not comfortable with who I am.
I don't like what I see in the mirror.
I don't like what I feel in my head.
I am lonely but would rather be alone.0 -
Yeah, I spent about 3 years on dating sites. They were all looking for Barbie....or quick sex.
Couldn't it be said that the same thing happens in offline means as well? People are people. Though online isn't the greatest medium, I will agree there.0 -
Because I was fat enough that in a 14 year period there were only two women that showed any interest in me at all. One was a student who wanted a better grade and one started out by saying "my friend's dad works with you and he makes tons of money." Now that I've lost a lot of weight and women find me appealling, I want to savor the experience and enjoy it as much as possible without turning it into a game.0
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Because I'm a f-ing idiot.0
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Because I'm a f-ing idiot.
:frown: No! You're not!
:flowerforyou:0 -
Because I'm a f-ing idiot.
:frown: No! You're not!
:flowerforyou:
haha thanks:flowerforyou:0 -
apparently i am too demanding and opinionated lol. i think its hilarious that this guy i was seeing cannot deal with the fact that i have brains and an opinion. oh well his loss.0
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haven't found that special someone who can make me a great sandwich and cut the corners off of it too.0
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apparently i am too demanding and opinionated lol. i think its hilarious that this guy i was seeing cannot deal with the fact that i have brains and an opinion. oh well his loss.
Yup. It's astonishing how many men still seem to expect women to have zip between their ears. You have my empathy.0 -
haven't found that special someone who can make me a great sandwich and cut the corners off of it too.
Hahahaha!!!0 -
apparently i am too demanding and opinionated lol. i think its hilarious that this guy i was seeing cannot deal with the fact that i have brains and an opinion. oh well his loss.
Yup. It's astonishing how many men still seem to expect women to have zip between their ears. You have my empathy.
thank you! I told the guy that if he wanted a trophy wife who just sits there and looks pretty without having brains, i'm definitely not the one!
he replied with, "IF ONLY U WOULD GIVE IN AND LET ME LEAD AND BE IN CONTROL THIS WOULD WORK"
wtf? :noway:0 -
I'm single because I don't try hard enough to meet men, and men don't try hard enough to meet me.0
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apparently i am too demanding and opinionated lol. i think its hilarious that this guy i was seeing cannot deal with the fact that i have brains and an opinion. oh well his loss.
Yup. It's astonishing how many men still seem to expect women to have zip between their ears. You have my empathy.
thank you! I told the guy that if he wanted a trophy wife who just sits there and looks pretty without having brains, i'm definitely not the one!
he replied with, "IF ONLY U WOULD GIVE IN AND LET ME LEAD AND BE IN CONTROL THIS WOULD WORK"
wtf? :noway:
Has he been reading '50 Shades' and having Christian Grey fantasies? :laugh: Think he may have missed the point... Oh dear. Ah well, hopefully the next one will be somewhat less caught up in his own little fantasy world.0 -
apparently i am too demanding and opinionated lol. i think its hilarious that this guy i was seeing cannot deal with the fact that i have brains and an opinion. oh well his loss.
Yup. It's astonishing how many men still seem to expect women to have zip between their ears. You have my empathy.
thank you! I told the guy that if he wanted a trophy wife who just sits there and looks pretty without having brains, i'm definitely not the one!
he replied with, "IF ONLY U WOULD GIVE IN AND LET ME LEAD AND BE IN CONTROL THIS WOULD WORK"
wtf? :noway:
Has he been reading '50 Shades' and having Christian Grey fantasies? :laugh: Think he may have missed the point... Oh dear. Ah well, hopefully the next one will be somewhat less caught up in his own little fantasy world.
LOL i havent read the book yet. but i definitely told him he needs to grow up! his parents are divorced for the same reason - dad wanted to be in control. mine have been together for almost 40 years. they both share responsibilities and make decisions together. yup i think i'll stick to my idea of a balanced relationship where women have a say too!
he asked me if I had a pair of balls he didnt know about? I SAID NO JUST BRAINS. effin idiot!0 -
apparently i am too demanding and opinionated lol. i think its hilarious that this guy i was seeing cannot deal with the fact that i have brains and an opinion. oh well his loss.
I was just told this last week! I was blown away. Guess they want the submissive type. That's certainly not me. I go after what I want in life and have no interest or patience for playing games.0
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