Am I just that bad or what?
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We can make this the official REVIEW MY PROFILE thread if need be.
I decided to dust off my OKCupid profile and give this online thing another shot. My user name is MikeM53082 (if you search for the name, the profile should come up).
I'm extremely receptive to constructive criticism. So now is your chance to tee off on me
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could only see your POF one and to me you say that you have a sense of humor but I only saw your serious side just my two cents0
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We can make this the official REVIEW MY PROFILE thread if need be.
I decided to dust off my OKCupid profile and give this online thing another shot. My user name is MikeM53082 (if you search for the name, the profile should come up).
I'm extremely receptive to constructive criticism. So now is your chance to tee off on me
I like it, Mike! Personality and sense of humor definitely show through and you've shared a lot of unique things, not the standard answers I generally see. A couple little things:
"I love doing cultural thing," You need an s on things.
" I have a demanding job in telecommunications regulations field." This says to me you're a workaholic. Can you say it a little more positively? Challenging, but exciting? Or are you really trying to convey that you work a lot and don't have a lot of free time, because I don't get that impression from your posts with how much time you have been able to spend with your neighbor.
"What the future has in store for me. Anything about real estate ideas, career goals, meeting a nice gal on OK Cupid lol" Maybe a little more punctuation in here, since you did take that technical writing course and all.
Should there be a comma after real estate or is it ideas about real estate? I like my lols spelled thusly: LOL! but I'm weird like that! (I lurve me some exclamation marks, if you haven't noticed yet.)
Last one, although it's not at the bottom: "I'm much more of a pub and upscale restaurant (love Indian, Thai, and anything super spicy) kind of guy as opposed to a downtown Fort Lauderdale/Miami Beach person." I just not might understand this because I'm not a local. Are all the Indian and Thai kind of restaurants there "upscale" or are the Ft. Lauderdale/Miami Beach things more like hot dog stands?
Now pictures... we may have more of a problem. I really don't like seeing so many with you and a woman. It looks like you are using pictures with an ex-girlfriend, which is a bit off-putting and could suggest the pix are old, especially when there's no explanation that it's your sister, cousin or a friend. I can't remember if you can add something to explain who the woman is. There's no reason for you not to clip the other person out of the second photo. Photos #3 and #6 should be cropped more (unless you can explain who they are), but I'd rather see them removed. That might sound a little strange and play into my own insecurities, but I don't like to see it and I'm pretty sure I'm not alone. Women don't want to see a hint of your past dating life in your profile.0 -
We can make this the official REVIEW MY PROFILE thread if need be.
I decided to dust off my OKCupid profile and give this online thing another shot. My user name is MikeM53082 (if you search for the name, the profile should come up).
I'm extremely receptive to constructive criticism. So now is your chance to tee off on me
I like it, Mike! Personality and sense of humor definitely show through and you've shared a lot of unique things, not the standard answers I generally see. A couple little things:
"I love doing cultural thing," You need an s on things.
" I have a demanding job in telecommunications regulations field." This says to me you're a workaholic. Can you say it a little more positively? Challenging, but exciting? Or are you really trying to convey that you work a lot and don't have a lot of free time, because I don't get that impression from your posts with how much time you have been able to spend with your neighbor.
"What the future has in store for me. Anything about real estate ideas, career goals, meeting a nice gal on OK Cupid lol" Maybe a little more punctuation in here, since you did take that technical writing course and all. Should there be a comma after real estate or is it ideas about real estate? I like my lols spelled thusly: LOL! but I'm weird like that! (I lurve me some exclamation marks, if you haven't noticed yet.)
Last one, although it's not at the bottom: "I'm much more of a pub and upscale restaurant (love Indian, Thai, and anything super spicy) kind of guy as opposed to a downtown Fort Lauderdale/Miami Beach person." I just not might understand this because I'm not a local. Are all the Indian and Thai kind of restaurants there "upscale" or are the Ft. Lauderdale/Miami Beach things more like hot dog stands?
Now pictures... we may have more of a problem. I really don't like seeing so many with you and a woman. It looks like you are using pictures with an ex-girlfriend, which is a bit off-putting and could suggest the pix are old, especially when there's no explanation that it's your sister, cousin or a friend. I can't remember if you can add something to explain who the woman is. There's no reason for you not to clip the other person out of the second photo. Photos #3 and #6 should be cropped more (unless you can explain who they are), but I'd rather see them removed. That might sound a little strange and play into my own insecurities, but I don't like to see it and I'm pretty sure I'm not alone. Women don't want to see a hint of your past dating life in your profile.
Mellie,
Thank you for the nice review! I thought you would have been a little more critical of me, so I'm pleasantly surprised
You're spot on with the gramatical errors. Maybe you can grant me a free pass because I have an engineer background and we are notoriously poor when it comes to stuff like that. But, I will certainly make the changes you recommended.
You're correct on the pictures, they are both with old gf's. I really should do a better job at cropping their butts out of the picture or just take the picture off all together. You make a good point on that, I totally see where you are coming from.0 -
I disagree with Mellie's assertion on other women in photos. I think it works to your advantage. When women see you in photos with other women online, your status is raised. It serves as social proof of quality social skills. A guy who is around other women is perceived as more desirable.0
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I disagree with Mellie's assertion on other women in photos. I think it works to your advantage. When women see you in photos with other women online, your status is raised. It serves as social proof of quality social skills. A guy who is around other women is perceived as more desirable.
Not for me. I see a guy with girls in the picture, especially different girls and I think they are a player and I pass them by.0 -
When I see a picture of a girl w/ a guy, it usually doesn't deter me. I think to myself "so this is the kind of guy she goes for", then I decide whether to e-mail or not. I think it's pretty valuable intel.0
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Perhaps you should take a poll then. It seems Dave agrees with you, but you're not trying to catch the attention of a man. So far, two women see it will cause you to get passed on.When I see a picture of a girl w/ a guy, it usually doesn't deter me. I think to myself "so this is the kind of guy she goes for", then I decide whether to e-mail or not. I think it's pretty valuable intel.0 -
I disagree with Mellie's assertion on other women in photos. I think it works to your advantage. When women see you in photos with other women online, your status is raised. It serves as social proof of quality social skills. A guy who is around other women is perceived as more desirable.
Not for me. I see a guy with girls in the picture, especially different girls and I think they are a player and I pass them by.
I agree with Mellie & Ruth! If a guy has photos with other women on their profile it's a complete turn off, so NEXT!0 -
Oh, three now! You and I were posting almost simultaneously!I disagree with Mellie's assertion on other women in photos. I think it works to your advantage. When women see you in photos with other women online, your status is raised. It serves as social proof of quality social skills. A guy who is around other women is perceived as more desirable.
Not for me. I see a guy with girls in the picture, especially different girls and I think they are a player and I pass them by.
I agree with Mellie & Ruth! If a guy has photos with other women on their profile it's a complete turn off, so NEXT!0 -
Is it really *that* much of a turn-off? It's only a picture and I think it shows that I'm a social, well adjusted young man :laugh:
I'd be curious to hear more opinions on this.0 -
I have a feeling men won't care.. but every women will be against it. Just a hunch.0
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I wouldn't say the idea of another woman partially being in the picture bothers me at all.... BUT I say that admitting that if I could see enough of her, I'd use what I could see of her to make a judgement on whether I might or might not be his type. What can I say... women overanalyze? I'd say crop it more just to be sure. So, yes, your hunch will be correct...0
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Perhaps you should take a poll then. It seems Dave agrees with you, but you're not trying to catch the attention of a man. So far, two women see it will cause you to get passed on.When I see a picture of a girl w/ a guy, it usually doesn't deter me. I think to myself "so this is the kind of guy she goes for", then I decide whether to e-mail or not. I think it's pretty valuable intel.
I pass on those guys too0 -
I disagree with Mellie's assertion on other women in photos. I think it works to your advantage. When women see you in photos with other women online, your status is raised. It serves as social proof of quality social skills. A guy who is around other women is perceived as more desirable.
Not for me. I see a guy with girls in the picture, especially different girls and I think they are a player and I pass them by.
Yup.0 -
Pics with women...
It depends for me. If the guy had a pic of celebrating his b-day with hot hooters girls, I would think he is fun and wild.
Other than that, it depends on the body language. If they're hugging closely or the chick is on his lap, I don't see the point and pass him up.0 -
Is it really *that* much of a turn-off? It's only a picture and I think it shows that I'm a social, well adjusted young man :laugh:
I'd be curious to hear more opinions on this.
If you are with a group of intermingled girls and guys that would show you are social. If you are with a group of women in all your pictures it is the turn off and shouts player. If the same woman is in all your pictures, and it isn't labeled that she is a releative then it is a red flag. I would see that girl as trouble even if she is just your best friend. She will consider you her possession and have trouble with another girl in the picture.0 -
Is it really *that* much of a turn-off? It's only a picture and I think it shows that I'm a social, well adjusted young man :laugh:
I'd be curious to hear more opinions on this.
If you are with a group of intermingled girls and guys that would show you are social. If you are with a group of women in all your pictures it is the turn off and shouts player. If the same woman is in all your pictures, and it isn't labeled that she is a releative then it is a red flag. I would see that girl as trouble even if she is just your best friend. She will consider you her possession and have trouble with another girl in the picture.
Perfectly said.0 -
After a certain age we all have a "past" but that doesn't mean we want to hear about it or see you flaunt it before we event meet you... Same principle where most of us agreed in another thread that we don't want to know how many partners someone has had either. It's a simple thing to change and won't lead us women to over-analyze if you only have solo photos on your profile.
This sounds nice in theory, but don't guys often say that male-female friendships don't really exist? That all our guys friends really just want to sleep with us anyway?It's only a picture and I think it shows that I'm a social, well adjusted young man.0 -
Warning! I'm about to be brutally honest so read on at your own risk.I pretty much get 0 responses on match.com and on pof.com. Is something wrong with how I look or my profiles?
Opinions:
http://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=35289218
http://www.match.com/profile/Show?UID=hi4T/xkanG2GpU+dwR/wQQ==&Handle=arguy1984
I only read your Match profile, but I thought it was boring. You seem like a pretty good guy but if I was a chick I wouldn't want to date you based on your profile.
First, your tagline "Single hardworking guy looking...blah blah blah." You just described yourself really well, and that's great, but you want something a little more witty that will attract more attention and make them think.
What I got from your profile was that you work a lot while raising a kid, and you just had a heart attack. Save the heart attack conversation for the first date. Focus more on the positives. The first paragraph in your profile is a little boring too. Sounds like every other profile and made me want to stop reading. Delete that crap and put in a joke or something that more represents your personality. Try to sound more fun and/or interesting. The occasional exclamation point can work wonders!
Add a question to the end of your profile or some sort of conversation starter.
And for the love of god if you have a lab puppy post a picture of it! Preferably with you in it too (I hate when people post pics without themselves). Don't say what it's name is though, let them ask (it's a good conversation starter).
And as always, I don't claim to be an expert but I eventually found a few things that worked for me. Feel free to PM me if you have any specific questions, I'm always willing to help.0 -
I disagree with Mellie's assertion on other women in photos. I think it works to your advantage. When women see you in photos with other women online, your status is raised. It serves as social proof of quality social skills. A guy who is around other women is perceived as more desirable.
Only a man would think/say this!! :huh:
I agree with Mellie, take the bird pics out, unless it's obviously your Mother!
To me it just speaks of insecurity, like you need to SHOW us that you're capable/attractive enough of being with a girl!! Totally unecessary, you're selling yourself, not your history of conquests!! :flowerforyou:0 -
I don't know about that, women get weird about seeing photos of ex-girlfriends, it could go either way. I've always tried to keep all my photos to just me, and maybe my dog. Keep the past in the past.I disagree with Mellie's assertion on other women in photos. I think it works to your advantage. When women see you in photos with other women online, your status is raised. It serves as social proof of quality social skills. A guy who is around other women is perceived as more desirable.0 -
Also if we see pictures of a guy with an ex-girlfriend we think "This guy isn't over his ex-girlfriend if he still has pictures of them together".0
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Honestly pictures with women in them dont bother me. I hate the pics where everyone has been cropped out. You should have atleast 1 or 2 nice shots of yourself and then what ever pics you want. But I'm weird so my opinion may not go with what other ladies think
Edited for plain old bad spelling0 -
I've cropped all my ex-girlfriends out of the pictures. All that is remaining is a part of their arm at best.
For some reason, I just don't like too many solo pictures of myself. I don't want to give off the impression that I'm too much of a loner (though I can be on occasion).
I think pictures with male friends, whom aren't better looking, are always the best.0 -
I am holding a small infant in one of my pics, and I clearly label that it is not my own kid. I would guess that picture is positively perceived. 0
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I don't know about that, women get weird about seeing photos of ex-girlfriends, it could go either way. I've always tried to keep all my photos to just me, and maybe my dog. Keep the past in the past.I disagree with Mellie's assertion on other women in photos. I think it works to your advantage. When women see you in photos with other women online, your status is raised. It serves as social proof of quality social skills. A guy who is around other women is perceived as more desirable.
I agree with roadie, if there are unlabeled photos of you and a girl especially one wrapped around you or you are holding, I assume ex-gf. Now, I know everyone has a past, but seriously not what I want to be my first impression of you. Oh yeah, I usually love the photos of a guy and his dog (as long as it's not a toy breed of a dog) since I am a big animal person.
And fyi- no photos of your car(s), your bike, your giant fish you caught the weekend before, your bird, or your cat. I want to see photos of you and I really could care less about the rest until I get to know you.0 -
I am holding a small infant in one of my pics, and I clearly label that it is not my own kid. I would guess that picture is positively perceived.
Hmmm, you might want to reconsider that only because if someone doesn't read the caption or the rest of the profile they may assume you already have a kid. Especially since you won't date anyone with kids either, you don't want to be turning anyone off who otherwise might be interested.0 -
I am holding a small infant in one of my pics, and I clearly label that it is not my own kid. I would guess that picture is positively perceived.
Hmmm, you might want to reconsider that only because if someone doesn't read the caption or the rest of the profile they may assume you already have a kid. Especially since you won't date anyone with kids either, you don't want to be turning anyone off who otherwise might be interested.
I disagree with that, but maybe I am one of the few that read the profile as well as look at the photos. I like the photos of men with kids since it shows them as a potential father which is what I am looking for out of a partner since I want kids. But I also prefer to date men with no kids, so if I see a photo with a kid, I will try to figure out if it is theirs or not.
Oh yeah Dave, I thought you disagreed with online dating....0 -
I am holding a small infant in one of my pics, and I clearly label that it is not my own kid. I would guess that picture is positively perceived.
Hmmm, you might want to reconsider that only because if someone doesn't read the caption or the rest of the profile they may assume you already have a kid. Especially since you won't date anyone with kids either, you don't want to be turning anyone off who otherwise might be interested.
This is so true! I had a pic of me and several of my son's friends. It was one of the best pictures of my face I've ever taken so I had it in my profile until someone asked me why I only listed one child when I obviously had 4.0
