Self-conscious about working out?
KathrynJo3
Posts: 7 Member
Hey everyone!
I go to a school that is well-known for having the most attractive student body in the midwest and plenty of eating disorders to match. Because of this and because it's a small enough campus that I know a ton of people and see them often, I shy away from the rec and when I'm there, I only walk the track or ride the bikes b/c I don't want to...um...jiggle... It just seems like all those skinny *****es are looking at me when I'm there wondering what the fat chick is doing on their turf. I've taken to going only on Friday or Saturday nights if I don't have plans, and at other times I take long walks with my ipod.
So what I'm wondering is if anyone can relate to my problem and if so, any suggestions? It's a rare occasion when I can actually convince myself to tough it out and get to the rec.
I go to a school that is well-known for having the most attractive student body in the midwest and plenty of eating disorders to match. Because of this and because it's a small enough campus that I know a ton of people and see them often, I shy away from the rec and when I'm there, I only walk the track or ride the bikes b/c I don't want to...um...jiggle... It just seems like all those skinny *****es are looking at me when I'm there wondering what the fat chick is doing on their turf. I've taken to going only on Friday or Saturday nights if I don't have plans, and at other times I take long walks with my ipod.
So what I'm wondering is if anyone can relate to my problem and if so, any suggestions? It's a rare occasion when I can actually convince myself to tough it out and get to the rec.
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Replies
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I am still self-conscious still even after losing some weight. It doesn't help that there are a lot of runners at my college who run without anything but shorts and a sports bra if a girl or shorts and no shirt if a guy. I find that dvd's that you can do privately in your room help a lot until you can build up confidence to just go every week regularly. (Even when I lived in a dorm I used to workout in private with weights until I was running too!) I think once you see that you are capable of doing great workouts alone you'll want to show off to everyone else. Now I'm always competing (in my head of course) when I go to the rec or the apartment gym with those more fit girls. I want them to see that even though I'm not as skinny, tan or fit as them I'm on the same level as them and I will kick their butt if they send me a dirty look!
Of course, most people at the gym aren't gonna be looking at you if they are really there to work out. My boyfriend says it's all in my head and it's just my insecurities holding me back.
Try going a couple of times and see how you like it. IF you absolutely can't concentrate and can't stop wondering who's looking at you. Try what I did. It may help. DON'T let anyone/anything hold you back from getting fit! YOU CAN DO IT one day at a time!:flowerforyou:0 -
No one is judging you negatively for being active. Pretend you're the only person in the world, or that you're just in the Matrix and all the people are just simulations.0
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I totally get that..i never liked going to the gym on campus or off because i thought someone would always be judging me; and i think sweating is the grossest thing and it's something i do a lot, especially when i workout. I learned to just plug in my ipod and get into my own zone, i literally just focus on myself and pretend like i am the only person in the world and i even forget other people are there...and for the most part if they are there to workout themselves they wont be focusing on you. just remember you have the same rights as they do..i'm sure you have to help pay for the gym equipment with either tuition money or a membership fee, so if you are helping to pay for it then you have the right to use it all you want no matter who is around. it might take a little while to get used to the idea of being there with other people, but the more you go the easier it will get. just never give up and remind yourself of why you are there..ask yourself " what do I want to get out of being at the gym?" and let that be your motivation. good luck and stay strong0
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I know what you mean! This is the #1 reason that I do not work out!!! Good to know I'm not the only one...
I try to do some stuff at home to get some exercise in, but it's not nearly as effective, or fun.
But this summer I'm going to try and force myself to start going more often! The way I plan to convince myself to go is 1: surely less people will be there during summer, right? and 2: I'm paying for the use of the rec center so I'd better take advantage of it!! This is the only time of my life that I will have "free" access to a gym, so if I'm not working out now, what makes me think I will in the future?? I'd better get the good habits formed before it becomes more complicated, or I may never stop gaining weight!0 -
I felt like that too, but the more i went to the gym the less awkward I felt0
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*kitten* them and do your thing! You cannot let other people hold you back. Also, a tip: if you really want to lose some fat hit the weight machines instead of cardio. Do circuit weight training: pick out 10 machine for say upper body and do them back to back for 15the reps each with maybe 30sec inbetween. Then take a 2-5min break and do it 2-4 more times. Then strech out. Try to do lower body2-3 times a wk amd upper 2-3body times. You wont burn as many calories and stored fat during the workouts as cardio but youll burn far more after youre done by the body repairing your muscles.0
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I feel ya. "Most attractive female students in Canada" is my school. Multimillion dollar, massive fitness centre is usually pretty full. I'm STILL timid to go do free weights, even though I know I know what I'm doing.0
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I felt the exact same way. I suggest start going at a time that it's less crowded. Maybe early in the morning or late at night. My gym is pretty crowded 3-8 pm when people are done with class. Once you're more comfortable at the gym, you'll feel better about going when other people are there. I started noticing that I wasn't the most unfit person there and I didn't care who was. And I started to feel bad for the girls there who looked totally anorexic. Good luck!0
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Like everyone else here said, the best thing to do is turn on your iPod and lose yourself in the music. I hate going to the gym by my house during the day because I see people from my high school so I usually go early like 5:30 or 6 in the morning. Yes that means I have to get up early in the summer but honestly the results are worth it. I've been doing it for a few weeks now and I'm already losing weight.
Just remember, you're doing this for you and no one else0 -
I'm totally the same way....I tend to just jog or walk around the neighborhood by my apartment. I find that I prefer being outdoors anyways (I get less bored!) and then after about 30 mins or so I come back to the apt and do some simple exercises on my own to tone up (like squats, push-ups, lunges, etc) to tone up.I know i look COMPLETELY ridiculous working out so I'm more comfortable doing these things on my own until I build up a higher confidence. I have started going back to the Rec at school and doing the elliptical and I its not bad at all! If you go when its not too crowded and work your way up, you can do it!
No one is going to judge you anyway, but I totally understand cause i'm the same way!
Chelsea0 -
I totally know where you're coming from. I've been afraid of working out in a gym for years, and this was confirmed when I went to the gym for the first time about two weeks ago. Yes, the gym was pretty deserted, but the staff on hand is extremely judgmental, and many of the machines were not even turned on.
I didn't want to look like an idiot trying to use machines that weren't on (and don't turn on unless connected to the mainframe) so I had to settle for a treadmill.
At that point, I decided to just stick to walking down the hill to town and back, or around my apartment. Roughly in a day of work I end up climbing about 30 sets of stairs and walking at least 4 miles, so I try not to sweat my fear of the gym. Who knows, maybe when I lose a little more (and when winter comes) I'll head back indoors, but for the meantime, I think I'll just stick to walking/jogging outside0 -
*kitten* them and do your thing! You cannot let other people hold you back.
What this dude said.0 -
The thing is you just shouldn't care! You HAVE to start somewhere and there is the place. You have EVERY right to be there, just as much of a right as they do. Every time a girl looks at you funny let it be motivation to get in even better shape. One day, you'll have a body that is not only fit but HEALTHY as well, and they'll look at you and wish they had your body.
Don't worry about other people. You just do you, and in the long run you'll look healthier and it will be better in the long run. Don't be intimidated I PROMISE you'll be fine.0 -
Yes! Notice that when you are in the gym you only see the really in-shape people?
My school has a pretty awesome fitness center and all sorts of rec activities to do. I usually end up in the back, working in the room with no air conditioning with the old equipment because I don't want to be in the front.
Worse, I accidentally washed my mp3 player so now i dont have any workout music
I am also looking at my scheduel, which is 17 credits (5 classes), and the fact I will be working as much as I can on campus to make ends meet. I'm a nursing student, so it's a requirement to carry around your books like they are your only friend in the world. When will I have time to sleep, let alone work out?
But you know what? It's gonna work out all right. Screw them all. If they don't like me being there, they can suck it. I don't really want to look like them and they need to get off their high horses.
My advice is to get a workout buddy. It makes you accountable for working out and you can provide each other with motivation. Talking with them will help you keep your mind off of everything else and make the time go by faster.
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I can fully relate to your problem; I have the same problem myself, and it often prevents me from going to work out in more "public" places such as gyms...As long as the weather permits, I also enjoy walking outside, and hopefully when I lose a few pounds I can work up to jogging. Even when I walk outside in a park or on a trail, if there are a lot of people around I often feel like everyone is staring at me...I've been trying to combat this by smiling and saying hi whenever someone walks by me while I am working out. From my experiences though, most people there are more focused on walking/running/talking to the person they're with than they are on me. I think a big part of getting over self-consciousness is realizing that even if you think everyone is looking at you or talking about you, they're really not, because people as a general rule focus on themselves more than they ever do on you. You're definitely not the only one with self-consciousness issues, I think everyone has them regardless of weight or appearance.0
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I understand exactly where you're coming from but you have to focus on yourself. I always think in mind that its better for me to be at the gym with the skinnies then at the buffet and the skinnies looking at me and my plate! Just think positive and get into your own zone and if catch one staring SMILE back0
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The gym at my school is basically only for football players...it's like an unspoken rule...so I plan on joining the gym near my school! But yes! I donh't want anyone to ever look at me working out! Hopefully if I lose some this month, I'll feel better upon my return to school.0
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Might it also help going really early in the morning? That's what me and my roommate do--mostly because she's a morning person, and I'm an awkward little pud who hates working out in front of people.0
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My gym has an area where most of the frat boys and sorority girls work out, as well as a few machines around the corner. I go for those. Might help if you find a more isolated area like I do.
Also, early mornings on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday are great because everyone is hung over and the gym is empty!0 -
I'm so glad to know that I'm not alone. I go to the gym and I run and do the weight machines and that's about it because anything else I can do in my house, where no one else can see me.
I'm torn between the feelings of wanting to use everything there to get full advantage of the gym and having people watch me do it. I'm sure that everyone there is just doing their own thing and that there aren't a ton of people judging me but I feel like they are. From the minute I walk in to the minute I leave I just feel like people are thinking "ha that fat girl is struggling to do these simple things"
I just remind myself that at the end of this it won't matter and going will be the best thing for me. I need to gain more hope in people, cause I'm sure there are people there that are thinking "good for her" so I just need to stop thinking about other people, and just remember how great this is for me.0 -
I had a friend like this. I told her to suck it up. When I see bigger girls at the gym I think well they're trying to get fit, good for them. I don't think "ewww fat girl" it's a gym... People go there to get or stay in shape. Please don't use your specific college as an example. That's any college.0
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Hey everyone!
I go to a school that is well-known for having the most attractive student body in the midwest and plenty of eating disorders to match. Because of this and because it's a small enough campus that I know a ton of people and see them often, I shy away from the rec and when I'm there, I only walk the track or ride the bikes b/c I don't want to...um...jiggle... It just seems like all those skinny *****es are looking at me when I'm there wondering what the fat chick is doing on their turf. I've taken to going only on Friday or Saturday nights if I don't have plans, and at other times I take long walks with my ipod.
So what I'm wondering is if anyone can relate to my problem and if so, any suggestions? It's a rare occasion when I can actually convince myself to tough it out and get to the rec.
I literally had the same experience in college. And contrary to what everyone else has said, they probably are judging you. This is frequently how disordered eating works for most people. I am just leaning to rewire my self-hate response that I developed when going to the gym in college. Is there some other way you can workout? Open swim? Biking? Join a club or intramural team (frisbee and rugby are usually non-judgmental)? Taking a fitness class? Incorporating these into your workout routine might help you learn to like exercise and worry less.0 -
I feel worse for those tiny lanky mutha *****rs trying to gain weight at the gym. I feel like it's easier just to restrict calories and do what you'd do normally. Don't worry about your appearance at the gym... I've seen women put make-up for the gym and you already know they're not going to work out seriously. The worse you look for the gym the better the work out in my opinion. Once you start getting into workout fashion you've gone too far.
Don't compare yourself to others, just compare to yourself to the "old" you. Plus, if things go crazy we'll all go down and judo kick all those girls and then we'll see who really knows whats up.0 -
I go to a small college and the only people in the fitness room are these skinny (but fit) guys. I wanted to go in but not alone. I found a girl in one of my classes who wanted a workout buddy too so we started going together. The downside is that my friend was more petite and very attractive and all the guys would be talking to her and hitting on her -_- Now I feel confident to go alone though. Show them you are just as capable as they are and its your space as much as it is theirs. I can't tell you to not compare yourself to others, as I do that alot and that would be hypocritical of me. Just don't let them influence you. Keep strong!0
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Everyone's too busy looking at themselves to look at you.
If you still think otherwise just find a workout buddy to talk to and workout with make the enviorment less intimidating0 -
I used to feel the same way! For a long time, I didn't even want to run outside at all, because I didn't want people to drive by and go "wow, look at that blob trying to work out." But I've decided that nothing is ever going to change unless I push through that fear and just DO it. So my advice to you would be to go to to the gym (perhaps during a time when there are few people there, if you want to ease into it), put your headphones on, put on some music and just do your thing.0
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I see all these people saying "you just shouldn't care" but it's really difficult to get over this phobia. I have access to my campus gym but I'm mortified to use it. I do all my cardio in my apartment. I know it's something I'm going to get over eventually, but I do not think I'll feel better about it until I lose it bit more weight and feel more comfortable in my own skin. That's the whole point. Yes, we're doing this to get healthy but many of us have not felt comfortable in our own skin for a long time, if ever. That is a large part of why we're self-conscious about exercising in public. It's really easy for people who do not feel this way to just say "get over it." But unless you've ever truly felt like this, you can't possibly know how impossible that suggestion can seem.0
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I have a small frame and I still jiggle quite a bit. I'm petite but I do understand what you mean as I don't like working out in front of people either. Sometimes I feel self-conscious and hopeless even working out alone. Any time someone is trying to help me with how to do something I giggle nervously when I try in front of them and they think I'm not taking it seriously.
There are people that judge negatively about bigger people at the gym, but what I think is that we should think more positively about people trying to get in shape. They are doing something positive in their lives. And that is how you should try to see yourself, as well. I know this is hard, but you will get there.0 -
They're all too busy worrying about themselves, promise.0