I'm in an odd mood today, so I'm actually going to ask the question that just popped into my head. Be forewarned, it's going into X-rated territory.






In my observations, men tend to be turned on by women who take objects up their *kitten*. Why is a 'stick' a bad thing?

For that matter, why does 'suck' have such a negative connotation?

... these are the unanswered questions that sit in the back of my mind for weeks at a time.

I think Kits answered the stick thing pretty well. As far as suck I've also thought "Why don't you suck my d*ck?" was an odd insult. I spend more time pleading for that than anything else. The other thing that never made since was for slut or *kitten* to have a negative connotation. I really think those qualities should be encouraged and applauded!

but before meeting someone it just smacks of desperation and only being after 1 thing. If thats all you're looking for, cool - but I can't imagine pursuing anything remotely serious with someone who does this that soon. You KNOW they are doing it with everyone too, gross.

THISSSS. I can't stand it. I have unfortunately succumbed to online dating, and it's CONSTANT. I dont' care if we've been "chatting" or texting for weeks, that's not something I appreciate until AT LEAST after the first date. And even that's risky, because then it says "Oh we got the first date out of the way so now I can revert back to my actual perverted ways." Nope, just shows how you really are. Next!

^^ Honestly I was thinking exactly the same thing!

I want to know early on what potential there is...and so engaging in sexual flirtation is actually a turn on for me. The key for me is that it has to be seductive, intelligent and respectful (at the start anyway). Someone who has an amazing way with words or compliments who doesn't show all his cards at once keeps me very interested. It is a bit of a dance..and I enjoy being wanted and desired, even by strangers, even on a purely sexual level.

Compliments or even being called sex kitten (which I would laugh at actually) is flattering and emphasizes my feelings of femininity and being a sexual individual. I never feel I lack control in situations with men...so it doesn't really upset or throw me. I do have my own level of what I consider to be respectful, but it is hard to describe in writing really.

The person I am currently seeing has absolutely gotten it right!

I wonder if there is any correlation between how women scored on the body self assessment study and their opinions about sexual innuendo or comments.

Well i think I scored a 12 or 13 which should that I am mostly comfortable with my body ....... But I'm a dirty minded little perv which probably has more to do with it lol

I wonder if there is any correlation between how women scored on the body self assessment study and their opinions about sexual innuendo or comments.

Good question. You'd think there would be correlation. I actually scored a 28 or 29.. which doesn't make me all that comfortable with my body apparently. However.. I have a weird thing about committing strongly to quizzes..I always generally pick somewhere in the middle as opposed to an "always" or "never" category.

And truthfully, Jen's right. Being highly sexual and seriously dirty minded probably doesn't hurt.

I wonder if there is any correlation between how women scored on the body self assessment study and their opinions about sexual innuendo or comments.

Good question. You'd think there would be correlation. I actually scored a 28 or 29.. which doesn't make me all that comfortable with my body apparently. However.. I have a weird thing about committing strongly to quizzes..I always generally pick somewhere in the middle as opposed to an "always" or "never" category.

And truthfully, Jen's right. Being highly sexual and seriously dirty minded probably doesn't hurt.

But again, would you be highly sexual if you were in the body dysmorphic category? Or would you be more likely to avoid sex because you weren't comfortable with someone else seeing you naked, exploring your body, etc? The flip side is that it may also be possible that being more sexual has created a better body image than you otherwse would have because there are at least some aspects of how you perceive others think of your body which bring confidence to you.

Well even when I was my biggest and wearing a size 20w I was still a dirty perv lol.... I didnt mind sexual comments then either though lets be honest I didn't get near as many as I do now lol

But again, would you be highly sexual if you were in the body dysmorphic category? Or would you be more likely to avoid sex because you weren't comfortable with someone else seeing you naked, exploring your body, etc? The flip side is that it may also be possible that being more sexual has created a better body image than you otherwse would have because there are at least some aspects of how you perceive others think of your body which bring confidence to you.

Yeah..no chance I have ever or probably will ever avoid sex. I don't actually hate my body near as much as I think I thought others did. Now perhaps walking around naked in a brightly lit room might have given me some pause in past.. but honestly, the men I've been with have never been remotely as critical of my body as I could be. I will say at my biggest..probably a size 24, I felt much less like getting naked and much more shame..but now at about a 16..that has changed a great deal.
I look forward to a time when sexual comments are a bother.. to be honest I'm still surprised and flattered when I get them.

I think the points are good and there may be no correlation at all. One thing to point out though is that self image test has a little to do with your weight but it is entirely possible to be morbidly obese and have a lower score than another person that has a low body fat percentage. I took the test to measure your view of your own body and how you perceived others to view your body. Not as how you actuallly looked to others. I can anticipate where someone who doesn't like their body (who is a size 6) could be more offended by a comment about how they look than another person who is a size 12 but who is more comfortable with her body.

In some ways, this is a variation of the confidence is sexy argument. My thought was more along the lines of if you are confident in yourself and your looks, you may be more receptive to sexual advances than if you are not. Obviously, the nature of the comments matters. Some things are going to be considered rude and over the top by almost every one whereas some comments may be seen as clever and witty if you are more comfortable with who you are but still be considered offensive if you are less comfortable with who you are and how you look.

I think the points are good and there may be no correlation at all. One thing to point out though is that self image test has a little to do with your weight but it is entirely possible to be morbidly obese and have a lower score than another person that has a low body fat percentage. I took the test to measure your view of your own body and how you perceived others to view your body. Not as how you actuallly looked to others. I can anticipate where someone who doesn't like their body (who is a size 6) could be more offended by a comment about how they look than another person who is a size 12 but who is more comfortable with her body.

In some ways, this is a variation of the confidence is sexy argument. My thought was more along the lines of if you are confident in yourself and your looks, you may be more receptive to sexual advances than if you are not. Obviously, the nature of the comments matters. Some things are going to be considered rude and over the top by almost every one whereas some comments may be seen as clever and witty if you are more comfortable with who you are but still be considered offensive if you are less comfortable with who you are and how you look.

Actually, it might have the opposite effect. If a guy is showing sexual interest in you and you have low self esteem, it might build confidence and encourage you to go for the ride!! I do feel that men wouldnt do it if women weren't accepting it, so *shrug*

But, as I said, there are degrees. Flirting around pork chops is cute. Sending your junk pic to a girl when you haven't even asked her name yet, isn't!

Like I said, one has nothing to do with the other in my world. If a guy is being grossly disrespectful, I get turned off regardless of how horny I am or how high/low my confidence levels are.

I wonder if there is any correlation between how women scored on the body self assessment study and their opinions about sexual innuendo or comments.

Well i think I scored a 12 or 13 which should that I am mostly comfortable with my body ....... But I'm a dirty minded little perv which probably has more to do with it lol

I'd imagine that there is some correlation (I don't know how high) between how a woman thinks about her own body and how she feels about men making sexual comments to her. If a woman thinks her body is disgusting, I imagine there is a higher chance that she would be repulsed by a man who was interested in her body.

I scored a 15. I think i have a great shape (just wish it were smaller) but I only like sexual-flavor comments when they come from someone beyond the 3-5 date state where it's starting to look more like a relationship. And even then, I don't like things to get too detailed until we're exclusive. I know I'm an outlier on this one. BB and I talk quite a bit about sexual stuff (I actually bring up more innuendo than he does) but it's in proper relationship context.

I agree with the folks who said there is no right answer- the right one for you will give/take the right amount of innuendo for you.

I'd maybe argue that it could go the other way, too. I think that when people perceive themselves to be "low value" they'll put up with behavior that that people with higher self esteem wouldn't.

This too