Any of you ever been told this?
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vanillaorange2 wrote: »I feel the same as all you girls!!! I just tell people I'm working out to be the healthiest me I can be, and because I wanna fit back into my skinny jeans. And not have to buy all new bigger ones. That will usualy shut the negative comments down. Then I change the subject. Just because we are not "big" dose not mean we can't get in shap or loose weight!!! People can be just as mean to non "big" girls as they are to the heaver ones
Ah ! That's my answer too ! I was to meet a few friends at a bar recently, and they questioned why I did not want to go eat with them before (they were going to a burger joint). I had to tell them: "well, I don't fit in my suits anymore (Note: being a lawyer, I absolutely need them). Do you have like 1500$ to give me so I can buy 5 new suits ?"
Awkward silence ensued.
That was it. Now I have some family functions coming in March, and I really don't want to go... :-(
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I am female just under 5'4" and 26 years old.
SW: 144
CW: 136
GW: 125
I have been told by several people things like: "you don't need to lose weight" (my mom said this), "you are in great shape" ,"please dont lose weight" (one of my trainers said this) ect. But reality is that 144 lbs was the most I ever weighed and I was finding that none of my summer shorts fit ect and just not feeling great in my skin like I used to feel and definitely didn't want to keep gaining weight.
So I joined a 100 day fitness challenge at my gym and I am competing for strength/endurance challenge which takes into consideration body fat % lost and increase in reps on various weight machines (lat pull down, bench press, leg curl arm curl etc).
I get that they are trying to complement me (like my mom) or some other people that have more to lose than I do. ( I also have felt some negative vibes coming from of the heavier gals in the program and makes me feel less included in the "team" aspect of the program). But sometimes it irritates me and doesn't feel very supportive of my personal goals. sometimes I feel like "its none of your business whether I feel like I need to lose weight or not!". anyways I just wanted to see if any of you "not-that-heavy" girls ever get told this or feel the same way as I do.
I'm so glad all of you have this problem! I'm 5'4 and 145 and everyone I work with say they are mad that I'm trying to tone up and lose weight because I don't need to. The fact is I have always been around 120 and since I got married 9 months ago I've put on weight and I'm not comfortable with that and I have let myself get out of shape!
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I can definitely relate to this. At 48 years old, I'm 5'1.5" and 145 pounds and I look and feel like a beached whale but you can't tell because I am skinny fat. Everyone THINKS I am in great shape and they tell me I have a nice body but they don't know the fat that is hiding underneath those clothes. LOL
Yeah, I just disregard the comments from the bigger, unhealthy people. They just want me to stay in their club. When the comments come, I just tell myself, "Consider the source." I never get comments about not needing to lose weight from healthy, fit, normal weight range individuals.0 -
I can totally relate to this big time... I was born into a family of five that have obesity problems. I've always been the odd ball in the family (the smallest, thinnest) being that I've always weighed at 105 at 4ft'11 at the time, but that proved to be all wrong once I got pregnant I balloon up and swelled up to a good 200lbs!!! After pregnancy I weighed 160lbs and omg I felt and looked horrible, unhealthy, sluggish and tired all time. Being 4ft"11 tall the weights shows a lot I was actually in the obese category! So After 2 kids and 4 years later decided to get rid of the weight, got back down to a good 107lbs. Then after my 3rd pregnancy I balloon up again, now trying to loose the weight again, my CW is 118lbs trying to get back down to 105, the other day one of my sisters had mentioned to me that the last time I lost all the weight I looked like I was anorexic and a bag of bones (none of my ribs didn't even showed what so ever), and so did her boyfriend agreed with her too n I just gave them a ridiculous look like wow...seriously?! Wow... I was just at a lost for words, This is a man that gets turn on by women who can stand a soda can on their butt is judging me here.... I was just like whatever and shrug it off, and I do sense a lot of jealousy from my sisters, but I've tried numerous of times to get them on a diet plan with me, but they keep making excuses! They say they love food too much but yet they complain about their weight! Then they criticize me for being too skinny! I've been heavy at one point no two and I totally understand how hard it is and I love food myself, but the reality is it's hard work and no joke! No pain no game! I have 13 more pounds to go but I am feeling so much better, so healthy and more energy! And I have no intention of ever going back nor getting pregnant again! If they ever mention it again I'll take one of you beautiful ladies advices and let them know what my doctor thinks just to shut them up. I love them dearly but what I do with my body and health is entirely none of their business!0
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Yeah i hear it, but don't care what they think. All I know is i want to tone up for myself so i can feel comfortable in my skin and still be healthy and live activity for the sake of my daughters.
Do what makes you happy! That's the most important thing to keep in mind
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Lil_Northern_Light wrote: »Yeah i hear it, but don't care what they think. All I know is i want to tone up for myself so i can feel comfortable in my skin and still be healthy and live activity for the sake of my daughters.
Do what makes you happy! That's the most important thing to keep in mind
this is a great and position message, thank you! I am already feeling and looking great and finally proud when I look in the mirror again! if it makes me feel better than it really doesn't matter what other people think/say.
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I think what annoys me the most is people who assume that people with slimmer figures are just that way "naturally." Female friends are always going on and on about weight and exercise and then one will turn to me and say "You don't need to worry about this stuff, do you?" I feel like that belittles me on two fronts - A. I exercise 5-6 x weekly and eat healthy homemade meals most of the time...it's not like I just magically look this way. And B. I think that reinforces the idea that "overweight" people are less happy with the way that they look than slimmer people. It's not like you hit a goal weight and magically go "I did it! I'm here now! Everything is great! I don't need to think about health or fitness ever again, wheeee!" And conversely, someone who was heavier might just love the hell out of their body (go them!) and not want to participate in endless diet/exercise conversations. And C. now that I think of it - skinny does not always equal healthy! I know people who are very thin, don't exercise, and eat crap. If I did that, my body wouldn't look so good, but everyone is built differently. Being slender doesn't mean that person is healthy at all. So yeah, when people are like "Why do you care about this stuff, you're already fit?" I just don't know what they're on about. I am fit because I care about this stuff, but also looks can be deceiving - a slim body doesn't mean a healthy one, a bigger body doesn't mean an unhealthy one!0
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lcsimpson17 wrote: »I am female just under 5'4" and 26 years old.
SW: 144
CW: 136
GW: 125
I have been told by several people things like: "you don't need to lose weight" (my mom said this), "you are in great shape" ,"please dont lose weight" (one of my trainers said this) ect. But reality is that 144 lbs was the most I ever weighed and I was finding that none of my summer shorts fit ect and just not feeling great in my skin like I used to feel and definitely didn't want to keep gaining weight.
So I joined a 100 day fitness challenge at my gym and I am competing for strength/endurance challenge which takes into consideration body fat % lost and increase in reps on various weight machines (lat pull down, bench press, leg curl arm curl etc).
I get that they are trying to complement me (like my mom) or some other people that have more to lose than I do. ( I also have felt some negative vibes coming from of the heavier gals in the program and makes me feel less included in the "team" aspect of the program). But sometimes it irritates me and doesn't feel very supportive of my personal goals. sometimes I feel like "its none of your business whether I feel like I need to lose weight or not!". anyways I just wanted to see if any of you "not-that-heavy" girls ever get told this or feel the same way as I do.
I'm so glad all of you have this problem! I'm 5'4 and 145 and everyone I work with say they are mad that I'm trying to tone up and lose weight because I don't need to. The fact is I have always been around 120 and since I got married 9 months ago I've put on weight and I'm not comfortable with that and I have let myself get out of shape!
This is me to a T. I am 48, 5'3 and 130 Lbs. Since getting married I have slowly put on weight. Even though my husband loves me the way I am, I know I will feel better about myself if I lose 10 pounds and build some muscle. I have started an office fitness challenge and the other participants give me grief about my efforts. I just plug along and ignore the comments. Hopefully, they will see the positive change and not dwell on the negative. Their choice, just like it is my choice to be healthier, thinner, more fit.0 -
yup, i get similar reactions frequently. i'm 5'8" and currently 150 lbs, which is a healthy weight for my height, etc. i would like to lose about 5-10 more lbs (i hit my heaviest last spring at 163 and freaked a little) just because 145 is a range that i always *felt* good at. strong, energetic, healthy, etc. i will say that although i have a part of me that vainly wants to tone up and have a killer body, i am more wanting to be and STAY healthy. although i am not overweight, i wasn't very active and i didn't eat well. i am working to be more consistent with this, and it will probably mean dropping a few lbs in the process. the biggest straw was realizing the health issues my mom has and how she (hasn't) made lifestyle changes that could help manage them better and not wanting to end up there myself.0
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Yep me to I am 166cm tall and weigh 59kg but I still have fat around my middle. People tell me I am skinny but apart from one friend who is really skinny 49kg all the others are overweight and the biggest offender is obese. I think they resent people who are a. Healthy weight, but when you see what they eat you know why they are overweight. Pizza and burgers are not on my food list. I am going to continue eating healthy and working out so that I can enjoy life when I get older and not spend all my time in doctors rooms like so many people I know do.0
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Wow our stats are pretty much identical! But yes I've had comments like this. The odd one off my friends like "you don't need to loose weight" but it's my mum that annoys me with "don't loose any more" etc etc. Even though a few years ago she was always hinting that I should loose weight! It does get frustrating!0
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Love all this.
I'm 5'4 and I'm 132! My heaviest weight!
I have always been 117-120 so I feel like I have an added layer and all in my mid section!
My friends think I have an actual problem because I want to eat better and have abs. I always think that there's room to improve your health.
There is no such thing as not "needing" to eat better because your body looks good. It's about health and living longer as well!0 -
Oops... My coworker she is 5'8" n 165 lbs.. She wants to reduce weight and I told her she dont need to becoz she looks absolutely fine n smart...I m 5' 1" n 115 lbs .. Also trying to reduce weight... She also told me I look fine n don't need to... We r not jealous of each other .. In fact having really friendly relation but after reading thread I m now thinking that i should have not said anything....0
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I'm 5'6 and I'm at about 146. It's not terrible because I know some of it is muscle but I hate that I have built up this strength and it's surrounded by fat. I want to be able to see my hard work. So my goal is 130. I know if I told anyone that I'm trying to lose it they would probably look at me funny. But I know it's there and I have to live with whether I'm going to be my best self or not. At the end of the day that is what counts.0
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meremaid2014 wrote: »I think what annoys me the most is people who assume that people with slimmer figures are just that way "naturally." . . . . . .
So yeah, when people are like "Why do you care about this stuff, you're already fit?" I just don't know what they're on about. I am fit because I care about this stuff. . . . .
This is my new favorite quote!!!
Exactly how I feel.
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