Does being single embarrass you?
Shrinking_Xtina
Posts: 478 Member
I get pretty embarrassed when friends and family ask if I have a boyfriend and I have to admit "no." It just makes me feel like they'll assume I'm unwanted and pity me. I'm also very uncomfortable when I'm with a group of friends all speaking about their significant others and I'm the quiet one with no input because I'm obviously single.
I really don't feel like I should be dating at the moment, because I've got major insecurities but since my experience with dating has been minimal, I always dread anyone asking me about my love life. It was even more embarrassing for me when I was bigger but still bothers me now, can anyone relate?
I really don't feel like I should be dating at the moment, because I've got major insecurities but since my experience with dating has been minimal, I always dread anyone asking me about my love life. It was even more embarrassing for me when I was bigger but still bothers me now, can anyone relate?
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Sometimes yes. Especially in certain situations. For example, a lot of people in my major classes are coupled up/married. My cousin who is my age has been dating a guy for a few years and they're now engaged. That's embarrassing in the slightest thatI'm still single.
But among my friends, no, since only a couple of them have boyfriends.0 -
No. But I'm newly single so I imagine if years later I'm still single and I go to family functions, maybe I'll be shy about it.0
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I don't feel embarrassed about it, but when I'm asked how long ago my divorce was and I say 14 years, I get some fun comments back.
Bottom line, I don't need someone to define who I am. And neither do you. Live the life you want because you have the freedom to set your own rules. Have fun and good things will come your way0 -
I'm not embarrassed to be single because I'm glad I'm not in my past relationship anymore but it do get awkward sometimes when I'm around my two brothers and my older brother is married ad my younger brother has a girlfriend (2 very successful relationships) and I feel like a 5th wheel. I always feel like a 3rd, 5th, etc wheel so that can become awkward sometimes0
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Hmmm! Sometimes I suppose, but mostly no. Depends on the situation. I'm kinda embarrassed going to weddings on my own, and I have two this year.....:grumble: .:laugh: But generally I actually like being the one free to dance till dawn
You know, sometimes relationships aren't all they are cracked up to be! Perhaps the very reason I AM single!! :flowerforyou:
Talking of which, I'm just off down the pub to watch my beloved Spurs!! (That's a football team to all my US friends) :bigsmile: Now if I was with a guy that didnt like football then this choice would be difficult.......
Always think of the positives........... :bigsmile:0 -
I don't think people think you are unwanted, since you're obviously very attractive.
It truly helps though to have some past relationship experience under your belt admittedly (people probably accept the fact that you haven't found the right one more, makes the pill easier to swallow for them - not that you should care by the way).
This really. As much as I like being in a relationship, I'm having a blast at the moment with my life as a single. It's a different kind of happiness (of course), with less hassle and more freedom. More a "carpe diem" thing, involving randomness, less future planning, and no relationship building. It's nice and refreshing as relationships can be exhausting sometimes (but they bring their own type of happiness).You know, sometimes relationships aren't all they are cracked up to be! Perhaps the very reason I AM single!! :flowerforyou:
Talking of which, I'm just off down the pub to watch my beloved Spurs!! (That's a football team to all my US friends) :bigsmile: Now if I was with a guy that didnt like football then this choice would be difficult.......
Always think of the positives........... :bigsmile:
I will probably give up some of this freedom if I meet a girl I really feel some connection with, but it just hasn't happened at this stage.
I hate football (soccer? :laugh: ) on a side note... I'd have to stay home knitting.0 -
Honestly, sometimes yes, sometimes no, it all just depends on my mood and how the topic comes up.0
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Being single is not embarrassing; the way some people handle the fact that I am single is embarrassing. For example, at my grandfather's 80th birthday party, my grandmother took me around and introduced me to all their friends as "my only granddaughter who isn't married." I mean, what do you even to say to that? Then there's co-workers trying to fix me up with their sons or grandsons or friends' sons or guys from their church. All of that is embarrassing, but I am not embarrassed to be single.0
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Being single itself doesn't embarass me. It's how long I've been single is what embarasses me
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I wasn't embarrassed by it until I joined this group and saw how much action all the other single people are getting.....0
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It depends on where I am and how I'm feeling. Mostly no - but there are times when it hits me like a ton of bricks and I don't always handle it so well.0
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I don't really mind being single per se, but I realize it's just me worrying too much about what others think of my single status. It is annoying in certain situations, like when my dad questions my sexuality, but all of your insight has helped me think about it more positively. Thanks to all who responded.0
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I wasn't embarrassed by it until I joined this group and saw how much action all the other single people are getting.....
That's nothing to be embarrassed about - if you don't get out there then no-one will find you 0 -
Not anymore. Not since I found out a couple of years ago PoF has plenty of semi-literate, beer gut toting, wife beater wearing trailer park grandpas ready to snap me up.
I might not have many options, but at least I have the option to say that's okay, I'll pass!0 -
It doesn't embarrass me, though twice it has been a bit awkward at a formal social event when I didn't take a date and the hostess made a fuss of who I was going to talk to, as if it was a social problem. I love meeting new people. If I'd wanted someone to talk to all night, I'd have taken a date :grumble:0
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Not anymore. Not since I found out a couple of years ago PoF has plenty of semi-literate, beer gut toting, wife beater wearing trailer park grandpas ready to snap me up.
I might not have many options, but at least I have the option to say that's okay, I'll pass!
Lmao! I stopped searching after POF.0 -
It doesn't embarrass me, though twice it has been a bit awkward at a formal social event when I didn't take a date and the hostess made a fuss of who I was going to talk to, as if it was a social problem. I love meeting new people. If I'd wanted someone to talk to all night, I'd have taken a date :grumble:
Hahaha! You should have looked at her all serious and whispered, "I came alone because I intend to steal someone else's date."0 -
I'm not usually embarrassed about it, until new friends find out I'm 45 and never been married. Then I feel like they look at me as if I've got the plague or something.0
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Not at all!!! I'd much rather be single than settle for something less than I deserve :-)0
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I wasn't embarrassed by it until I joined this group and saw how much action all the other single people are getting.....
That's nothing to be embarrassed about - if you don't get out there then no-one will find you
This ^^
Plus online chatter is easy and you never really know what's happening behind anyone's computer screen.0 -
It doesn't embarrass me, though twice it has been a bit awkward at a formal social event when I didn't take a date and the hostess made a fuss of who I was going to talk to, as if it was a social problem. I love meeting new people. If I'd wanted someone to talk to all night, I'd have taken a date :grumble:
Hahaha! You should have looked at her all serious and whispered, "I came alone because I intend to steal someone else's date."
Ha! Good one
Reminds me of when I was newly single and it used to bother me when people asked if I had been seeing any nice men (in a way that I knew meant, "Are you getting any?"). To which, after replying, I would ask how their sex life with their husband was going :laugh: 0 -
:laugh:It doesn't embarrass me, though twice it has been a bit awkward at a formal social event when I didn't take a date and the hostess made a fuss of who I was going to talk to, as if it was a social problem. I love meeting new people. If I'd wanted someone to talk to all night, I'd have taken a date :grumble:
Hahaha! You should have looked at her all serious and whispered, "I came alone because I intend to steal someone else's date."
Ha! Good one Reminds me of when I was newly single and it used to bother me when people asked if I had been seeing any nice men (in a way that I knew meant, "Are you getting any?"). To which, after replying, I would ask how their sex life with their husband was going
:laugh:0 -
Not anymore. Not since I found out a couple of years ago PoF has plenty of semi-literate, beer gut toting, wife beater wearing trailer park grandpas ready to snap me up.
I might not have many options, but at least I have the option to say that's okay, I'll pass!
Lmao! I stopped searching after POF.
Plenty of Fish is like shooting fish in a barrel. The bottom of the barrel!0 -
It used to bother me all the time. I didn't get a serious boyfriend until later in life, so I always felt uncomfortable about it. First I got into a relationship just to be in one... bad idea, realized I had to work on myself, so that's what I did. I learned to be happy being me. Years later I got into a serious relationship thinking it was what I wanted. I was unhappy and broke up with him. I've realized I'm so much happier on my own, being single. I love it. I guess I'm more independent than I thought.0
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nope I'm happy so whats to be embarrassed about .... my biggest problem is that my granny doesn't understand that I can take care of myself.0
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What is it with dads questioning the sexuality of their single daughters?? My dad used to tell me all the time in high school, it's ok with me if you're gay, I'll love you just as much. And sit there waiting for me to answer...
Really the only time I feel self conscious is when I have to eat out alone. I bring a book so I don't feel so... alone? lol0 -
What is it with dads questioning the sexuality of their single daughters?? My dad used to tell me all the time in high school, it's ok with me if you're gay, I'll love you just as much. And sit there waiting for me to answer...
My dad used to do this to my brother, who didn't date much in high school or college. He was very popular with the ladies and had girls calling him all the time, but he's the type who is turned off by women who chase him. And he had a knack for asking out women who were already involved with someone (and not forthcoming about it), so he had a really hard time finding a woman he could be in a serious relationship with. My dad used to say "I know you aren't gay, but people are going to think you are if you don't find someone and get married soon."
My dad is also constantly harping on my sister and me about how you shouldn't wait till your 30s to have kids. We'll be 30 in September, and my sister and her husband have only recently decided they want children. He thinks this is stupid because "You're going to 50 when your kid graduates from high school!" as though that's the worst thing in the world. I'm not even married yet, and he acts like I should just resign myself to being single and childless forever. I think the baby boomers still don't get that it is okay, and in many cases preferable, to get married and have kids later than they did.0 -
What is it with dads questioning the sexuality of their single daughters?? My dad used to tell me all the time in high school, it's ok with me if you're gay, I'll love you just as much. And sit there waiting for me to answer...
Really the only time I feel self conscious is when I have to eat out alone. I bring a book so I don't feel so... alone? lol
I actually got it from my mother since I would never tell them when I was dating a guy or interested in one. I was never the boy hungry teen girl with pictures of actors or musicans around me room (other then Jim Morrision and The Beatles).
I only feel embrassed when people my grandparents age ask me about being married or etc.0 -
No I am not embarrassed to be single. I am pretty happy about it right now. Nobody really asks or implies that I should try to find someone. It has been hard on my relationship with BFF, she is still married and does a lot of things as a couple, so I get excluded a lot.0
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What is it with dads questioning the sexuality of their single daughters?? My dad used to tell me all the time in high school, it's ok with me if you're gay, I'll love you just as much. And sit there waiting for me to answer...
I've never had a boyfriend or anything, and I don't really talk to my parents about this kind of thing. I've been on two dates with this one and both times my mom has happened to call me later and say "oh what did you do tonight?" I flat out lied. I just don't want to get too excited and have my mom get excited and have it crash and burn. I'd rather call my mom when something serious happens and be like "just so you know, I've been seeing this guy and whatever." Because I don't talk to them about it, sometimes I worry they think I'm a lesbian and are just scared to ask me.0
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