I'm definitely not a vet, but here's my opinion on it. If the marriage was in trouble, WLS won't fix it. If the marriage was going fine, then WLS won't destroy it either. Now that being said, there are things that might happen along the way directly related to WLS that cause a problem. For example, if you were to start spending all your time focusing on you and never have time for your spouse, then you will have a problem. Also if you try to force your lifestyle changes on a spouse who isn't receptive to them then you might have problems.
Was your man supportive of you having surgery? Did he understand the lifestyle changes involved with WLS?
My husband understands that I have to eat a certain way and that I have to exercise. He isn't willing to eat exactly like I do and that is fine. He does exercise regularly and always has. When I cook, I fix one meal for everyone (me, hubby and 8 yr old daughter) that is typically meat and veggies. I add a starch for hubby and daughter.
We like to do active things together on the weekends (he works evenings and I work days so we don't see each other through the week much). We like to hike, bike, swim, etc. We also do things that we have always done like shopping, eating out and going to movies.
I take care of me, but also make sure that I have quality time with my husband and child. My husband and I like to have date nights too. Quality time with your spouse is very important. Don't cut out the together time to have more time to exercise and don't change everything you do together like saying we can't eat out anymore.
I haven't stopped doing any of the things with or for my family that I did before surgery. I still cook, clean, do laundry, grocery shop and spend time with them, but the difference is now I have more energy to do all that stuff.
As long as your man didn't voice a concern that you would get too thin or want to leave him or anything like that. And as long as you keep the communication lines open, then I think you will be fine.

From my many years in the wls community, good relationships tend to get better, bad relationships get worse. If things are good now, I would not worry.

I completely agree with this statement!!!! (I am currently going thru a divorce, and believe that it wasn't the WLS)

I've been married 23 years, I've been thin, I've been heavy.

A big game changer is when you go thru the surgery and you have those non-scale vicotries, who do you share them with? Do you turn to your spouse and allow him to share the journey with you or do you turn to a co-worker, old school chum etc. Same with as you find your way from the MooMoo's to the Hot Momma clothes do you dress and prance for your spouse, or do you put it on display for someone else to admire.

My hubby is my #1 fan partly because I allow him to be. I know there are days that finding out I can now zip up tall boots over my calves really isn't the most important information to him. But he is my partner and my better half and he's along for the ride!

Best wishes! Lisa

Ive been trying to figure out how I want to weight in on this one since last night. I'm a licensed therapist I have a different perspective on it then just being part of the group because before I ever considered surgery I had some clients who were dealing with the negative side effects of surgery. The surgeons are usually pretty good about warning everyone about hair loss, vitamin deficiencies, dumping, and all the other physical side effects but they usually don't mention or gloss over the other stuff. Alcoholism affects about 60% of WLS patients after their first year. The why of this isn't fully understood yet, one theory is that if food was an addiction for you, and you can't feed your addiction anymore, you turn to something else like alcohol but that also could be drugs or gambling or shopping or anything that can get out of hand. Those things can put more than a little stress on a relationship. There is also an addictive quality to attention as Kidskart (above) mentioned and believe it or not infidelity becomes the issue. There are also just a significant number of WLS patients who have had such low self esteem for so long that when they start building some back up with the weight loss they realize they married a total dead weight, and if they want the health benefits of weight loss to stay they have to get out of an unhealthy relationship.

If you have a partner that you can talk to and who's there for you odds are you are going to be fine, just remember that while losing weight is work, you don't neglect other things along the way.

My husband and I have been married for nearly 18 years. He married me thin and after children I slowly gained and gained and gained. I have always felt guilty about my size, because that is not who he married. Whenever I asked him, he always said that he loved me no matter what my size. Never, ever did he complain, but I still felt like he deserved the woman he met and married.

Finally I realized that I deserved to BE the woman he married. It was me who let myself go and me who needed to find myself again. I am really, really blessed to have such a wonderful husband. Find the one who supports you no matter what and you will be all set.