2016
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Thanks ladies.... it's getting worse...
Thanks milove and Gail
I'm really worried that this stress might give me another stroke and this time I may not survive.
I've started the formal complaint process and starting to document with my doctors
My primary care physician upped my mood pill from 5mg to 10 mg.... And is referring me to a psychiatrist
Up 10 lbs and not in the mood for walks
Please keep me in prayer0 -
Carol- so sorry to hear of your stress and blood pressure worries.
Suzy- lol about your form of rebelling - I think we all have resorted to that before ! Hope you have a wonderful time at the beach- wish I could sneak in your suitcase!
Gail- how's everything going for you ?
Vail- it took me a very long time before I was ready to reset my ticker- like a year. But it's a personal choice of course which is different for each person at different times. Before I really needed the acknowledgement of my previous accomplishment, while currently I feel the need to tackle this like It's own distinct challenge.
Millove- lol about the Bright side of downsizing being no company. I love Benjamin Franklin's quote " guests, like fish, smell after 3 days. " I actually was bold enough to say that to a sister of mine when she said she thought she would "winter" at my house for 4-6 months each year after also mentioning how my house felt like her house too and rearranging my shelves!
Snooozie- good for you for making good times a priority! How's everything else going?
Patrice- I sure hope you are adjusting to your meds better. I had similar side effects, so I can certainly empathize . I must say that you have persevered much longer with it than I did , so my hat is off to you.
I didn't meet my previously set goals for the week, but I am ok with that because I feel I needed a little more time to work/focus on some health issues, which I did. Along those lines , I've been working on some digestive issues including acid reflux and have some voice exercises given to me by a speech path because of a chronic hoarse voice these last 2 years ( at least partially related to acid reflux) . Say, do you think I can count voice exercises as my workouts??? Lol . Anyway, I'm going to still set a goal or two this week to try to get the scale moving in the right direction too, probably starting Monday.
Hope everybody is having a relaxing , enjoyable and healthy weekend.
Hugs~ Susan
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Hi everyone..
first of all im sorry I've been MIA lately.. honestly for whatever reason this site is causing me major grief trying to access anything... I even called my internet provider this morning to check on the speed because every time I log into MFP it freezes on the first page.. if I try to type any comments it becomes hung up and types one letter every 20 seconds... so FRUSTRATING... and when I try to get into the group it just "hangs".... so basically I just stopped coming in other than to click on the site in the mornings. I can acess it fine on my phone but I can't see to type and it's a pain in the *kitten* to try to type anything like a post on the phone... however... the internet people said i'm totally up to speed and have reset some stuff so today I was able to get in here at least.... now to go back and catch up on everything... brb1 -
ok.. i'm going to have to do bits and pieces and come back and edit as I go so I can read thru all the posts and updates..
Susan - im so sorry you had to deal with so many medical issues, especially with all the testing involved holy cow woman.. im very glad you are feeing better and will hope that the vocal exercises help somewhat, and that you figure out something for the acid reflux .. totally sucks and so much harder to even think about weight loss when we have any other medical stuff going on, eh? so kudos to you for being smart enough to know other issues took priority ... Carol - I completely agree with Milove about the toxic workplace; you must be scared out of your mind about the high blood pressure with your previous history - is there any chance you can simply get out of the environment at work - an early retirement? I know financially that isn't always possible, but your health is THE most important thing right now... im glad you're going to see a mental health professional as well - too many people are uncomfortable with the thought of getting help for stress; I remind my friends often that its just like physio but for the mind instead of the body.. we need to start teaching kids early on in school that just like getting medical help for a broken arm, its just as important and just as routine to get medical help for your mind when needed.
I know it's almost impossible when you're in a situation at work to NOT stress.. hopefully the phschologist can give you some coping skills if you cant remove yourself from the situation. I am not in the same situation at all, but on occasion my boss likes to deliberately wind me up and get me reacting... my goal this year has been to NOT react.. I won't give him the satisfaction anymore of seeing me freak out, nor will I let it upset me or stress me out. I haven't perfected it yet but every time he does it, I just think nope.. not this time and simply reply with a "uh huh.. ok... sure..." and smile.. or walk away and take a stroll thru the building while turning my mind to happy thoughts so I don't think about it and get stressed.. I hope you can find a way to NOT let the toxic workplace affect your health any more than it has.. it's simply not worth it in the end.
Gail - I saw your post about the 23lbs down in total.. girl how fantastic is THAT?? I AM SO GLAD you took the time to look back and realize just how far you have come and how much you have accomplished.... and so proud of you!!! huge congrats and thrilled for you..... Milove - lol @ the family NOT staying.. I think we all hear ya and my dad used to have the same saying about the 3 days!! Wow on the downsizing; that must have been a lot of work getting ready and doing the actual move.. I hear ya on the 2nd floor steps.. it one reason I want a dog when I retire so it will make me get out and about! hang in there! Suzy i'm sorry the doc scolded you....BUT.. better he caught you early on and has you headed in the right direction for LONG TERM recovery!! I know its frustrating but just keep on remembering it will benefit you in the long run if you stick with his rules now... and you'll be able to enjoy those lovely long hikes again down the road!! its funny I've started physio for my shoulder finally; been putting it off a long time and wasn't really sure it would help but I have to admit... it is making a difference ... I have been a little lax with the at home exercises tho so in solidarity with you I pledge to be more diligent with them!! and one and two and one and two and hold... and hold... 
Vail - I can totally relate with your recent struggles ... hang in there girl!!
Patrice - haven't seen you for a while; how goes the battle with the metformin etc??? hope you're ok... pls chek in when u get a chance..
Ok brief update on me; been really struggling the weight just keeps going up and I can't seem to stop eating everything and anything... I am miffed I cant fit into any of my summer clothes and I find myself falling back into bad habits like emotional eating and waiting til i'm famished to eat.. I honestly don't even know why.. everything is good at the moment (knock wood) so there is no reason why I shouldn't be motivated and psyched up to be working on me. I have a doc apt at the end of the month for my sugars and cholesterol and I wonder if there is some weird head game i'm playing with myself - daring the tests to come back high by eating everything in sight... ya I know tht doesn't make sense... but I wonder if i'm doing that to push that "scare" button again to kick me back into sense.. anyway.. i have decided this morning that whatever the reason, it has to stop so given myself a mental headshake and am going to meal plan for the rest of the week with weaning myself off the sweets and junk and pushing the water. If i don't start doing something nothing will change... except time passing.. so... why not today.
Righto... I've gotten back in here a few times to edit and update quite easily so keeping paws crossed that it will continue... will be back in a few hours to see how everyone else is doing... 1 -
Good to hear from you Snooozie. Sorry to hear you've been struggling. I can totally relate. Many of my clothes don't fit anymore, either, and my eating behavior has been baffling to me. The mental aspect of this is journey is so challenging, isn't it? I'm feeling some kind of disconnect between what I say I want to do or intend, and what I then actually do. That scare factor was a strong motivator in the beginning of this journey for sure. Now that it's gone, it seems more challenging to stick to a plan, and plateauing for a year didn't help. I've also been doing some self evaluation about it, and digging deep to deactivate sabotaging thoughts. I know we CAN do this , Snooozie. We WILL get a handle on it again!1
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Morning Hatters - sent a question to the tech support this morning as from searching it appears i'm not the only one having this problem, so i'l apologize now if it seems i'm not commenting on yours posts.. hopefully at some point they will figure it out.. personally i'm thinking its all the freaken ads and videos that load on the newfeed screen now that are messing it up..!!!
Susan - your comment about the disconnect is spot on for me; That's exactly what's happening; I KNOW what I can and should do, I KNOW all the info I need to make the weight loss happen, but something is definitely misfiring in the head games. after a little soul searching I think in my case it IS the sullen and angry reaction im having to the blood tests; on one hand I want the results to be good but on the other I think maybe a part of me also wants them to not be good to scare the crap outta me again. how pathetic is that??? Anyway I had the blood tests done this morning for the visit end of the month - and decided that thought pattern was too stupid to keep and im back to remembering why I first came here.. again. i'm not setting goals for this first week as such; it will be a week of weaning myself off the crap as I said and more focus on simply EATING healthy foods rather than CICO.
I weighed in this morning and i'm at the weight I last logged in with now, so will move forward from here. Here's hoping your self evaluation will bring you to where you want to be Susan As you said, we already know we CAN do it... all of us.. because we HAVE done it. So that should be half the battle already done !
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Good Morning, I was off for 2 weeks, and I started back to work yesterday. Carol, I just thought about something have you thought of what we call at our job, difcult her. Means have a difficult conversation with her. Email her and ask her if you could meet with her. When you sit down to talk, appear vulnerable. (Her name) you are making me feel very ......... and then tell her that you know that she is in charge but when she does........and whatever she did. It usually works at least they back down off you.
Snoozie I am in retrospect of what did I do not to overeat, and for me to repeat that, and its not working.
Yes, the downsizing is a long story and I will bore you with them at a later time.
Gwen
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Milove
Thanks... but in the Army... retired and who I work for as a civilian...we have a different approach...
I've actually filed a complaint....
Wish me luck
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I'm not the only person that she's impacted
And we have other managers causing the same issues and problems0 -
I understand Carol, it's good that you have others with the same complaint!1
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Carol - I hope something positive comes from your official complaint and I hope it's soon. Hang in there and keep seeking help and solutions. We're all thinking of you.
Snoozie - I'm not sure whether to wish you good luck or bad on your test results?! Just kidding...I hope they're good and that the results help motivate you. We need all the motivational help we can get!
Gwen - I'm trying to figure out how to go about the whole downsizing thing...any tips?
My beach trip was awesome! It was great to spend time with my daughter...just the two of us. My eating choices were terrible though. I have exactly ten weeks until my hiking trip. I'm thinking of resetting my starting weight to what I weigh now and starting from there tomorrow. I've been basically maintaining this weight for over a year so shouldn't that be my new starting weight for this next round of weight loss? Or would seeing the amount lost from the very beginning be more motivational? I can't decide. I just know that it's time to get real. If I want to achieve my goals then I have to have strong knees/hips/feet so I have to take this extra weight off of them.
What do you ladies think about resetting your starting weight to what it is now...when you haven't lost anything in over a year? Is this my new starting weight? At what point (after how many years) do we stop counting what we previously lost?1 -
Suzy - I reset my weight to now and deleted all my previous weight loss because for me it was a "safety net " as I could look and still say to myself look I lost a lot of weight.. But it was also my excuse for not moving forward from here. In the end the decision was right for me cause I'll always know How much I lost - and my goal is to stop recording total weight loss overall when I hit my goal weight.
I'm not gonna lie tho it was very hard to delete the entries.
That said tho I think we all have to do what works for us. If u don't want to or aren't sure whether u want to reset don't do it. Maybe for u seeing it is the motivation to continue - a reminder that you CAN do it because you already have.
For me seeing new progress from where I am right now is going to be the right thing for me. Like when I first started here and was thrilled watching those pounds come off
So do whatever feels right to u - that's what this site is for after all a tool to us as we see fit for ourselves1 -
Hmmm using my phone it cut off part of my post - finished with saying glad u had such a great time with your daughter. with all the madness going on all over the world right now any time y can spend with family and friends is a gift that should be taken at every opportunity.1
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I think you're right Snoozie. I think I am kind of falling back on the "but look how much I've lost" excuse when I go up a few pounds. I also get down on myself because I'm so far from my lowest weight on here. It was a big motivator when I first started to see how much I had lost (without thinking that I still wasn't down to where I was six months ago!). Ugh! The mind games we play! If only they burned calories!! I think I'm going to give myself the gift of a truly fresh start!
Bring it on MFP!!! I'm going to rock this weight loss goal!1 -
I think part of the reason I deleted my previous one was for the same thing Susie I didn't want to keep seeing that I wasn't near my lowest weight ever on here. I have 30 more pounds to lose right immmaterial of what I've lost before it has no bearing on what have to do now to get My goal So as ou have set today as day one of moving forward I'll just say rock on my friend - you will accomplish it!!
I'm just down at the lake usin Siri thankfully so early no one can her me talking to my phone lol I've had a relatively good week trying to wean off the crap and eat better - am back to work tomorrow so today's main goal is to set meal plans for the first two days; using my previous diary days from when I was losing as a a guide1 -
Cut off my post again hope everyone's doing well and has had a good week0
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was up way early this morning so hit the lake just as the sun was coming up... and had a bunny along for walkies lol. I tried to resize the photos smaller.. can someone tell me if it shows huge or not? thanks!
The doggie is Theo ... he is often at the lake with his young owner and I couldn't help but snap a pic in the waterfall as he was so proud he had caught the ball LOL. Temporarily changed my profile pic too - I don't normally do "selfies" but was in such a happy place at the lake it was an impromptu YAY moment LOL
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Yes , they came out small sized and lovely, Snoozie.... I wish I had somewhere this lovely to walk. It is amazing!!0
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yes I am quite lucky to have it so close, and to have figured out an alertnative to walking around my 'hood lol. Starting dayshift tomorrow so going to be a whole week without walkies there .... wahhhhhhh oh well... suck it up butter cup lol
thanks for letting me know they were tinier!0 -
What an absolutely beautiful place to walk! I'm envious! Loved the photos! I have no idea how to share photos here.
I'm so proud of myself for going to the gym today! I've started out great on my renewed efforts. I went to the grocery store and am prepared for a successful week! I entered my new starting weight and am trying not to let the number get me down. I need to put some photos on my fridge for inspiration. I'm going to work on that.1 -
Suzy its a lot easier now to post photos; just above this box where you type is a ittle picture of a disk and drop menu beside it.. (4 to the left of the smiley face pic above) u just clik on the drop menu, choose browse and choose the photo from yr photo u want to post and voila!
TOTAL kudos to you on going to the gym and on your renewed efforts!! I know how hard it was to enter that new starting weight, and smart not to focus on looking forward not back - it's your new starting point nothing more and just imagine how fab you're gonna feel as you watch that sucker change !! Putting my before and after pic of me on the cupboard (not the fridge for me as it has most of the healthy stuff in it. its the cupboards that call to me!) has also helped; when I go to open it and see that pic of me when I hit my goal weight.. its a moment to ask myself what do I want more; getting back there or that icky store bought cookie!! Look forward to hearing about your progress!!
Were havin a heat wave here; temps in the low 40'sC so think of you often Susan - as it's your norm!! Wowsa. I aint complaining tho... after the winter we had summer is too short to complain but looking forward to more normal temps I will admit lol!
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I've been thinking about you Carol and hoping you're doing better. Let us know how it's going!
I hope everyone is staying hydrated out there in this unbelievable heat! I'm so glad that I have a wonderful air conditioned YMCA where I can workout! Hiking wouldn't be much fun right now anyway so at least there's that little perk from the knee operation.
I've been able to stay on track for five days in a row, which for me...lately...is a huge accomplishment! I've been to the gym three times and physical therapy once, so I've been moving pretty consistently as well. I've just got to figure out how to keep up this momentum. Maybe a picture of the Appalachian Trail on the cupboard and a bikini on the fridge! Hahaha!
I hope everyone is doing well and meeting their goals! Stay positive ladies!
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Hi ladies... things are better... I really think that them upping my meds has helped... more concentration is a good thing... especially at this point in life...lol...
Still waiting on hearing back from the IG (the people I complained to)...
But I am keeping the positive e-mails that she has been sending me...the thank you and good job... for my evaluation next year....
She is still more than likely going to put me on a performance improvement plan... but better than losing my job...
She has been decent last and this week... I thanked her yesterday for the compliments... and she said that I actually earned them
I went to gastro today... going for my yearly MRI soon... of course we all know that there is nothing to worry about....lol...
(I always get good results back from every test)....
I did get out this evening when it wasn't so hot here in South Jersey... 1 and 1/2 miles in 24 minutes....
They did weigh me at the doctors... we'll go with "water weight" ....giggles... fall will be here soon...But the positive is that I still wear a size 14 pant and size L top ....:)
As always ladies I thank you for all the encouragement on this journey.....:)
.... (sounds like an acceptance speech)....
Carol
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I'm so glad to hear that things are better! That's great news! Like you, I'm encouraged because I'm still able to buy size "L" in tops. I refused to buy larger clothes, so my size 14 pants are a bit snug but wearable. I'm really hoping to be in a smaller size by October so I'm not buying new hiking pants until then. I hope the test goes well!2
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Good Morning ladies, the pictures are beautiful and relaxing to look at. Thanks Snoozie for sharing and for informing how to get pics on here. Suzy i had a difficult time to downsize, I rented two storages and now I am going to go through the 2 storages slowly and throw away (craiglist) what I do not need. I am buying new (compact sizes).. My hands were forced it was a four bedroom house some work needed but nice, and my land lady broke up with her husband and needed to move back. When we first moved in she was so desperate she had the two houses and wanted to sell the one moved in, but we were not ready, so she would had to offer it to us first before selling it (on our lease. Such as life.
Victory news. Yesterday, was my first time that I did not go over in calorie counting. yeah. One day at a time my goal is to repeat that today.
Much love ladies.2 -
Good for you milove!!! Every journey starts with a single step! This weight loss thing is definitely a journey. Sometimes it's a steep uphill climb with huge boulders in the way and other times it's really hard! Lol!! Good for you and keep up the great work!
Good things come to those who sweat!!1 -
Thanks Snoozie, I had to share this with you ladies. Yesterday I was running late for work and was unable to eat breakfast or make something to bring with me, I did not get a long enough break before lunch to run out and get something. I ate lunch went home exhausted and ate four wings, salad had frozen in the fridge unable to eat and passed out and went to sleep. Anyway I awaken now and when I recorded my food I was told that (Based on your total calories consumed for today, you are likely not eating enough). If only they knew that yesterday was truly a mishap.1
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Milove - while i'd like to take credit for SUZYQHOLLAND's inspiring message to you above, it was her, not me . But I do echo her sentiments on a job well done - and as far as the wings late/frozen dilemna etc... believe me I totally get it!!
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Lol milove... just weighed in....lost 10 calories a day....0
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Carol, good to hear that things are better and not worse...
Milove, downsizing, huh, guess I can count out me and my crew coming down for a spell, huh? LOL
Snoozie, Seehe, Vailara, Patrice...I hope all is well with you!1
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