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Do we eat to hurt ourselves?

PamelaR64PamelaR64 Posts: 10Member Member Posts: 10Member Member
During a recent emotional binge, I wondered if I was eating to hurt myself. Women who hurt/self-injure themselves seem to have many of the same reasons/causes those of us who binge or emotionally eat do. I have an appointment with my therapist today and I plan to ask him his opinion...
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Replies

  • melipon2166melipon2166 Posts: 34Member Member Posts: 34Member Member
    Great question. I never thought of it as hurting myself but just not caring about myself. I can see how they can be the same. Let me know what your therapist says.
  • dgbahdgbah Posts: 1Member Member Posts: 1Member Member
    Put it down and walk away. You deserve better!
  • sebedinasebedina Posts: 157Member Member Posts: 157Member Member
    I guess, it is a way of self-harming, and we don't always see the self harm first hand but certainly feel it a day later or the same day/night.

    When I have had a bad evening, it really affects me the next day. I feel guilty, feel despondent and feel exhausted or depressed. then I repeat the same pattern because I feel despondent...so it is a pattern of behaviour that is very destructive...
  • becaholicbecaholic Posts: 21Member Member Posts: 21Member Member
    I always ask myself, "Why don't I love myself?". If I really cared about myself I wouldn't eat until my stomach hurts and still continue to pig out.
  • kiela64kiela64 Posts: 1,327Member Member Posts: 1,327Member Member
    Yes, that's how I started to think of it. As punishment. I'm looking for an excuse to be angry with myself, to hate myself (because I already am/do), so when I eat excessively I give myself one.
  • pinkyslipperspinkyslippers Posts: 188Member Member Posts: 188Member Member
    kae612 wrote: »
    Yes, that's how I started to think of it. As punishment. I'm looking for an excuse to be angry with myself, to hate myself (because I already am/do), so when I eat excessively I give myself one.

    I agree so much with this. There is always an element of capitulation when I binge, it’s me giving up on myself. It is a form of self-harm. None of us would ever treat another person this way...

  • xionaxxionax Posts: 18Member Member Posts: 18Member Member
    That's a good question to ask for more info! I eat to punish my body so I would say yes, I also self harm all due to ill health. I go into a difference zone were I have know control. I'll never understand me & food!
  • sebedinasebedina Posts: 157Member Member Posts: 157Member Member
    Yes it definitely feels like self harm. I wake up the next day in despair, not knowing what to do... but I think it isn't always simply about greed.... white flour is highly addictive, so I am going to avoid this and see if it helps
  • 303lissy303lissy Posts: 406Member Member Posts: 406Member Member
    mkellam wrote: »
    For me it's not quite self-harm but more an act of rebellion. I'm stressed out trying to fulfill many obligations, trying to be a "good person," a "responsible person," and letting my perfectionist streak call the shots? Yea, something breaks eventually and it's like I suddenly view healthy eating as another obligation and I buck it HARD out of some bizarre act of reclaiming my choices. It feels like I'm rebelling or liberating in the moment, but then later I just feel gross bc often I get a sugar crash or didn't even enjoy the actual food. I've been working on relaxing and saying no more often and it has helped with this urge but it still crops up. Does this make any sort of sense?

    Wow. I never would have thought of it that way but it seriously feels like you crawled inside my brain and formed my jumbled thoughts into a coherent sentence that I wouldn't have been able to say. This is exactly it. I'm not a rebellious person by nature, so I don't want to "hurt" anyone else with any act of rebellion, but hurting myself doesn't count.
  • tmoneyag99tmoneyag99 Posts: 456Member, Premium Member Posts: 456Member, Premium Member
    for me I feel a sense of calm after eating. Usually my binges and emotional eating occur during times of extreme stress. I'm in survival mode. I'm not sure why yet but I do know that, THAT is what I'm doing.
  • DebbborraDebbborra Posts: 4Member Member Posts: 4Member Member
    I always feel that there's a point where eating crosses over from simply out of control to deliberately (not exactly deliberate but subconsciously deliberate) self destruction. It almost feels like a punishment sometimes. But it's not that simple. Sometimes it feels like a lifeline or tbe only available comfort. If it always felt bad it would be easier to stop.
    edited May 2018
  • MermaidSparkle12MermaidSparkle12 Posts: 1Member, Premium Member Posts: 1Member, Premium Member
    mkellam wrote: »
    For me it's not quite self-harm but more an act of rebellion. I'm stressed out trying to fulfill many obligations, trying to be a "good person," a "responsible person," and letting my perfectionist streak call the shots? Yea, something breaks eventually and it's like I suddenly view healthy eating as another obligation and I buck it HARD out of some bizarre act of reclaiming my choices. It feels like I'm rebelling or liberating in the moment, but then later I just feel gross bc often I get a sugar crash or didn't even enjoy the actual food. I've been working on relaxing and saying no more often and it has helped with this urge but it still crops up. Does this make any sort of sense?


    YES!
    Totally this. I think growing up very religiously and restrictively, having a dairy intolerance and having healthy heating shoved on me heavily by my mother and watched all the time all feeds into my rebelliousness and self destruction.
    27, still living at home with my parents and my partner.....and sometimes eating what I want is the only thing I can control, and only when nobody else is around.
    How messed up is that?!

    I was also talking to my psychologist about why I eat tons of dairy at the moment in a self destructive manner.
    I used to think it was self protection....like, if I get fat and unattractive means men won’t abuse me ever again....
    BUT.
    Possibly, it may be that I am SO certain that my partner will cheat or leave me one day, that in a really messed up way I’m taking control of the situation by making myself unattractive so that if/when he does, the reason for it is my lack of attractiveness and not my personality etc.
    In a way it’s just a way to control the situation and prepare myself for something that may never happen.
    So it’s a kind of protection.

    But it’s just a theory!
  • RoaringgaelRoaringgael Posts: 356Member Member Posts: 356Member Member
    Over eating does harm us. I think its more that it is a maladaptive behaviour in which we are still trying to find comfort in. That is it worked as a comfort once and we return to it hoping/not even thinking really, that it will reward us in the same way.
    Addiction is all about behaviours that have become harmful and which we are finding almost impossible to stop even though we are aware. They require effort on our part to change. Change is never easy.
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