Share Your Day
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I am feeling mentally dull today. If the weather holds and the grass has some more time to dry I will probably go ahead and mow the back with the hope it clears the fog and I can work more efficiently later. Otherwise I will just have keep trying to slog through this work. I hate knowing things are taking longer to accomplish than needed.2
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We went out and got new books at the library. I got about ten or so, and I'll have that read in a week, in addition to the twenty or so books I'll read online. I'm hyperlexic as part of my autism and reading is my stim.2
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Today has been hard, anxiety wise. I've managed to convince myself that something is wrong with my kidneys, even though I know my blood work in June was all good, and I literally have no symptoms
anxiety will do that for you, though, and I'm seeing a doctor tomorrow anyway
But, despite that, I managed to make myself do 30 minutes of youtube chair cardio and am now enjoying a late lunch of tuna, a half a cup of grapes, a triple zero greek yogurt and a side salad with baby carrots, grape tomatoes, baby spinach and lettuce with se lite zesty italian dressing!
Go away anxiety and let me enjoy this weight loss journey!4 -
Get this: I've been struggling with mental fog and fatigue for several weeks now. This week is TOM with a countdown of less than 24 hours IF my body remains predictable (because sometimes it just can't stand to let me onto its actual pattern), which really had me dragging this weekend. Yesterday, I worked my rear off doing heavy work cutting wood, stacking brush, and splitting said wood for 5 hours worth of activity that my body is not used to by any means. As I expected, though I was tired, I was very sore when I went to bed and first got up, and I got about 6 hours of sleep last night with a couple of wake ups.
However, I'm actually feeling energized today, I'm not dragging this afternoon wishing desperately that I could just crawl onto the bed behind me and take a nap! I am sore, especially my arms, but its mild and not bad.
So apparently, walking 8 miles a day or pushing mowing 3 lawns isn't enough activity to energize me; apparently my body needs something REALLY heavy duty to get it going......Go figure...... lol
Course that would probably be a different story if I was outside right now - today and tomorrow are pretty hot and humid and I figure it must be since my air conditioner in my living room kicked on mid-morning; usually its not kicking on until early afternoon. We'll see if I can get a walk in today or some kind of activity outside; this kind of weather spawns pop up thunderstorms.
Which really would stink if it would rain when I get off work - the first time in weeks that I've felt itchy and wanting to get outside and DO something, and I might get stuck inside because of showers.......The sad part is, what I really want to do is something physically demanding, like firing up dad's little power saw and finish cutting up the tree limbs we brought back for his shop stove!
Hmmmm. If its' not raining, I could borrow that saw and go back down to their camp area and work a few more hours clearing some more limbs for them. And I can take a couple of hotdog wieners with me and build a campfire and just eat out for dinner instead of what I had planned, cause that can always be tomorrow's dinner!4 -
Today is my first scout meeting of the year. There isn't much planning as it is our annual slip and slide meeting but I am still in charge. Scariness!! I feel pretty energized and the kids always help with that.
I won't get in a work out today since scouts starts so soon after work but I am well below what my calorie needs are so no need to fret about earning more. I will even be able to grab something quick to eat and it not mess with my numbers.2 -
My day has been good!...my husbands spinal injections and increase in his pain meds have been a Godsend....he has actually slept at night and felt like going out for lunch Sat. and Sun....I have felt good....lots of energy...Less anxiety....getting harder to sit still for very long....I have sorted and thrown out clothes this week,gone swimming,baked cookies,made a jello salad,and run errands...besides the usual laundry,dishwasher,making bed, Cooking, etc....I am still looking for another exercise that I enjoy...as I get more fit, I might actually start walking around the block when our weather cools off..
..( that could be December! LoL ).... I have stayed on track one more day!6 -
Starting to look at some menus for a nice meal out this weekend. I am hoping the scale gods are kind to me this week and give me a full whoosh but I am going out this weekend one way or the other. We have a trip coming up in which we will eat with minimal calorie restrictions so after this weekend I am going to want to do the straight and narrow thing until the trip. A really nice weekend meal allows me to blow off some steam and have something really good before being a little more strict.
This is how I see managing myself in maintenance too. I think before a holiday or vacation I would go into a mild calorie deficit 2 or so weeks before because I know I will be going into a small period of surplus eating. I would rather bank in advance than pay it back after. Time will tell if that is what works for me but that is how I am mentally doing it now. The restaurant trip marks the beginning of what would be the banking period. And yes... I think about this stuff way too much. lol.2 -
@NovusDies: I don't think you think about it too much. For me, part of accepting this as a way of life instead of a diet(and therefore temporary) was to say that, okay, to care for my body so that it is in its best shape going forward, I have to not only drink plenty of water, avoid nightshades, eat a moderate level of fiber on an ongoing basis, and avoid preservatives and fructose, but weigh and measure what I eat. As a friend of mine said, "Diabetics have to do it all the time." I'm not diabetic, but if doing that's the price for not being diabetic, not getting heart disease, and remaining fit and active into my old age.... that's a price I'm willing to pay.3
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last night was fun. I got off work at 5, went over and helped my mom unload a wagon of wood, then started out on a walk. Originally, I was just going to make it a short 3 mile trip, but decided to keep going. PRoblem was, I understimated my time and how fast that storm front was moving because on the return trip, the sky turned black, the wind picked up, and by the time I got back to the outskirts of town, I was actually jogging, hoping to make it to the car wash in time to at least beat the rain! I got a little wet, but made it before the worst unleashed. I was dodging tree limbs, though, when the wind front hit. I called mom to come and get me from the car wash lol It wasn't a wasted trip for her, though, because she needed to go to Dollar General for eggs and bread and wanted to get there and out in case the power went out and their registers went down. First time I've had to call her.
So my 6 mile walk ended up cut short at 5 miles, but at least it was 5 miles and not just 3!
Today will not have any activity unless I can get a quick elliptical session in or a cardio. That storm front did enough damage that the power company I work for has opened up damage assessment crews, meaning the damage was severe enough with a large enough customer count that its too much for the local center to handle by themselves, so I'm working dispatch meaning I have to stay home, so no walk.2 -
today's plan is to take a couple hours later this morning to go help mom and dad cut wood, then come back and make up those hours, so I'll be working late this evening but should still get some activity in before the evening thunderstorms hit. I've already cleared the idea with my boss.
I'm still waiting to hear from the best friend on our plans for next week. We were supposed to go camping, but I'm afraid she is going to get her vacation plans canceled on her because of the storm as she works for an AEP power company call center and they are going to be working over time dealing with the hurricane. I hope not - she needs the break!1 -
Going to go do the weekly shopping. I'll make up the list this morning with the help of my meal plan and the whiteboard in the kitchen, where people write what they personally run out of, and then have the shopping done by lunchtime. Then I can sleep through the heat all afternoon, and cook dinner at the proper time. By tomorrow the heat is supposed to break here for a bit, and that will be lovely. I'll actually be able to do more of the cleaning that I had to set aside, and we may even get the shelves up in the garage.1
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So far my day has been good. Done some weights at the gym, and played badminton for an hour. Pretty much the same as yesterday, except today, I pulled my shoulder, hope it's not too bad, as it could mess with my training. Been at a steady 1600 calories every day for three weeks. Gym at least 4 times a week, and badminton twice a week. I weigh myself every day, and please don't trust the scales. They've been up and down like a yoyo, but the overall trend is down. I have my 19 year old daughter sleeping over tonight, so better get some teenager food in! 95lbs to go!!!!!1
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My plans today include doing as little as possible!...I am on a rest day!0
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I just had a phone scammer call. He even sounded reasonably credible. I didn't win the top prize, I won the runner-up prize. He asked me how I felt about it. I told him if it was real it would be nice. It was clever because he asked for a non-vital piece of information first. I assumed this was to get me comfortable when he asked for whatever he really needed. The problem for him was that I was never going to give him ANY information which is the best way to protect yourself. He got cussing mad. He wanted to know what the GD I thought he would do with an alternate call back number.
I let that call go on too long but it was worth the chuckle.1 -
I am such a liar lol....I can’t seem to sit still for very long any more!...I decided to clean the kitchen from top to bottom and then I felt like baking!...I made a loaf of Skinny Banana Bread and a loaf of NOT Skinny Death By Chocolate Zuchinni Bread...it is strange that when I am not on an eating binge these foods don’t bother me to have around....I might eat a slice of the banana bread in the morning with coffee....the family will have it gone in less than 48 hours!....now I am wondering if I could walk to the end of the street BUT I am not swimming today...and I found a spot on my nose from the sun I need to have zapped at the dermatologist...It’s always something.....3
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I don't like sitting still either but it's too hot, my worse ankle (I have a bad and a worse ankle) is kvetching, and my lower back is sore from standing and walking around, so I need to sit down and just be quiet.
I'm seriously considering napping and not making dressing. I can have the premade wild rice pilaf with the chicken, Girlfriend can have steamed baby potatoes and cheesy broccoli, and Boyfriend can have cheesy broccoli alone with his.1 -
I wish TOM would show up. It just couldn't start yesterday when it was supposed to of course - no, my body can't be predictable......No, it's be a week late and will start next week if I get to camping....
I took a walk this afternoon to try to beat the rain that is predicted for this afternoon. Got in 7.96 miles (missed 8 by 0.04 measly miles lol) But I stopped at taco bell for lunch. I got a power bowl with no sauce, no rice, easy guac and easy cheese, which got that thing from 470 calories to 220 calories. But I also ended up with 2 chicken tacos. Yes, they were fresca style with sour cream and both together came to 320 calories. That would have been fine if I hadn't been weak willed and gave in to the half cut tea for another 150 calories. And the volpi stick for another 120 calories - though at least it also has 12g protein. So I basically wiped out the walk calories on lunch.
Then I get back and actually need to take a nap I got so sleepy, so now I'm on the hook for another hour of work before I can have my evening free.
Then while in the kitchen, I couldn't stay out of the peanut butter of all things while putting my eggs onto boil, so I ended up coming back here to change the amount of time I charged for the walk - I had only given myself 75% of 3.4 mph, but I went back and used 100% but only at 3 mph, which gave some more calories but still gives me something of a buffer. That at least got me back into the green if I eat my egg for dinner straight hard boiled and don't devil it.
I made koolaid jello for dessert, but thanks to my eating today, I'll have nothing else left if the snack bug hits again, and I'd like to have about 200 calories left this evening. So I either need to figure out how to hold myself off, or find another activity that will earn me 200 calories. But I'll need a burst of energy to do that, and I'm not sure what I can dig out to get me those calories, especially if it starts raining before 6 pm when I get off work.
The radar looks favorable for dry weather; maybe I can dig out my garden rake and work on smoothing out the dirt and picking up the rocks where grandpa used his big backo to dig out 2 tree stumps on the bank beside my property......2 -
TOM always messes with me, too. Last few days I've been falling (My loss pattern is plateau and cliff) and this despite the fact that TOM is just around the corner. It's been too hot and steamy to do any work, and it's messed with my head and made me feel awful, and so I know, I just KNOW, that this weekend when I'm trying to cook extra food for MIL and FIL, when I'm trying to hang curtains and deep-clean other areas of the house.... TOM will show up and keep me on the couch because of cramps. I cannot wait for that system to shut down.1
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The best part of getting older!...although it is weird to miss it occasionally....2
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I actually don't mind TOM; I just prefer that it be regular and predictable! But then again, I don't suffer debilitating cramps, either. TOM for me has always been rather mild, with the only way I can tell its coming on is that in the day or two leading up to it, I find myself extra cranky and extra hungry, and in the last 3 or 4 years, fighting depression symptoms. Though usually it doesn't dawn on me why I'm cranky or hungry or depressed until I start and then its "Oh, THAT'S why I felt that way!" *shakes head* You'd think after 30 years of this I'd have learned by now.....
And since I'm not married and don't have kids, TOM shutting down will bring on a period of grief for me, too, because that means that I truly am beyond the ability to have kids. right now, there is still a tiny part of me that won't let go of that hope, even though I'm 40 and the time window is rapidly closing and I've been trying for 2 years now to get myself used to the idea that a husband and children are not in my future. Despite rational me trying to drum this into my psyche with a sledge hammer, there is always a small irrational part of me of that refuses to give up that long held dream. Which means that when menopause does hit me, its going to hit with the force of a mack truck.....forget turning 40 bringing on a midlife crisis; for me, 50 will be the big one
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I had to do some grieving when I got my tubes tied, too, and said farewell to ever getting to "try" to have a kid. (All my pregnancies were unplanned.)
My sister had her daughter at forty, so it's not undoable, but yes, the window is closing. All the hugs. Fertility is a complicated mess.2 -
I slept really good last night and my husband didn’t have a bad night sleeping either...I usually check on him a couple of times but I didn’t hear a thing...we have a bed that adjusts on each side so his tossing doesn’t bother me mostly...thank goodness for my grands!....our daughter is teaching from home and ours do not go back until Oct...they both went with me this morning to the produce market,the dreaded Walmart, and Publix...they help so much with the water, sodas and bringing stuff in the house from the car...and today I didn’t have to buy too much extra stuff for their help lol....mostly snacks and some frozen pizza and ice cream....I bought myself ONE molasses cookie and really enjoyed it!...I also hit 260.0 on the scales which is my lowest weight...now to stop seeing that darn 6 as the second number...3
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Had a massive fight with Boyfriend because he yelled at me over his pet issue. He finally calmed down and I stopped crying and we were able to work out that I can't avoid doing certain things online if I don't know what he considers tolerable limits, and that when he comes out and rants for twenty minutes, and doesn't tell me "Hey, don't use facebook and google, they're mining your data" in so many words, all I get is a feeling of depression and a thought of, "Well, before we stop using the internet altogether, I'd better research beekeeping so that I will have wax to make candles with in our cabin in the woods, and I'd better hurry up and get strong so I can haul our water from a well, and...." and that sometimes I don't have the bandwidth to supportively listen to him rant about the horrors of surveillance capitalism and what we have done to ourselves. Of course, now he's convinced that he can't write the book on it, because I don't like it. (headdesk) I mean, it's not MY personal issue, but yes, they do it, yes, it's wrong, what can I do in my daily life about it, and I'll ignore what I can't fix. (sigh)
Hopefully he gets the job that he's been talking to the recruiter about, and he starts exercising with us girls when we go, because then he'll be tired enough not to have time to obsess about it and get off into the weeds.
So he's skipped dinner and gone to bed early, and I just feel really worn out and sad all the way round. I don't mind him working on this, but I really don't want to hear about it several times a day, cause I don't like listening to anyone rant.4 -
Not the greatest day today. I needed some calorie burn from jiu-jitsu tonight but didn't get it at all. I'm finally starting to have the pre-Tom signs that I know indicate I should be starting tomorrow morning, finally - 2 days later than I expected. That, however, has me hungry and depressed, and I ended up eating maintenance today. But I've had some really good scale days in the last 2 days, so I can live through it.
tomorrow is going to be very difficult. The remnants of Laura is coming through with rain and thunderstorms all day tomorrow. I desperately need to make myself hit the elliptical tomorrow and try to get a cardio video in - SOME kind of activity to add back a few more calories, or I'm going to find myself at another maintenance day because I won't be able to do anything outside tomorrow.
*sigh* and I came home to find a message from the best friend - looks like her vacation has been canceled on her because of the hurricane, so she doesn't get to go camping. I was going to take next week off for that vacation, but now I need to re-evaluate my plans, look at the weather forecast, and decide whether I want to go ahead and go on by myself this week, push it off until next week, or just not go all together.1 -
Well, he's just being sad at me today. I'm a little crampy off and on so maybe soon we'll get TOM and I can stop being paranoid about it sneaking in on me.
Am looking forward to cleaning out the closet. It's nice to have some energy.2 -
well, today was difficult, but not for the reasons I thought.
First, the rain quit by noon; apparently it moved through last night.
Then, I found out I misunderstood the friends message - she is on call for part of next week, but can still go camping if we could find a place within an hour of her work. I was able to make reservations at the state forest that met those requirements, so the camping trip is still on, Tuesday through Sunday.
I made plans when I thought she could go and made reservations at another state forest, but would you believe they actually had agents answering phones on Saturday? And that they had no problems cancelling that reservation AND helped me find a park map at a different website since they don't have them anymore on theirs after their upgrade AND was able to change the site I had reserved after I saw the park map and realized it wasn't ideal? Wow!
So, I spent most of the afternoon grocery shopping for the camping trip. Of course Walmart didn't have everything I needed, nor did Krogers, so I also had to go to Lowes to get my propane. I also took my sister to lunch, but thankfully, she chose Wendy's which I can fit very well into my budget.
Came home, unloaded groceries, then decided that it was a perfect chance to get my grass mowed....until I came around my garden boxes and caught the stupid @Q#%@#$@$ bird netting that was on the pot to try to keep the deer and other animals from eating it. Spent the next hour trying to get the stupid stuff off my blade and actually ended up having to take it over to dad's to be able to jack the stupid thing up and use the air wrench to take the blade completely off. Ended up just getting the riding mowing down. And yes, I'm somewhat ashamed of myself for some of the choice words coming out of my mouth.......I swear if your lawn mower comes within 10 feet of that stuff, its like it magnetically pulls itself into your mower. I swear I am not using that stuff any more; I don't care if the deer eat what I can't fit into my boxes! It's not work the hassle or the headache!
TOM came this morning meaning I'm running a little tired today (I didn't wake up until 15 minutes to 9 am! the cats thought they would starve to death......) and my mood is shot, and the mower didn't help. That used up all the patience I have left this evening.
My arms are sore from trying to get that stupid stuff off the mower shaft and having to lift and tug on the mower (it melted itself to the stupid shaft), but I still have a pie to make (thank goodness its going to be crustless!) and I need to get the cushions cut for the camper, even if I don't get them covered tonight. I really need to vacuum but that ain't happening I can you that right now.
I'm also going to be over deficit again today, because I'm already 33 calories over with dinner and I can already tell the stew, which is good, isn't going to hold me until bedtime. *sigh* when is bedtime again?2 -
well, when I say over deficit, I mean over calorie goal for the 1.75 lb/wk rate I set, which is 750 calories deficit. So I'll be eating somewhere between 0 and the 750. Technically, even if my deficit ends up being 250 instead of 750, its still a deficit and I won't lose the ground I gained this week, at least.2
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Ate out 3 times today and about 1k above maintenance. Hit 201 this morning which is my new low but the fact that I am thirsty tonight confirms I will be on a decent uptick tomorrow. I seldom drink anything at night. I eat very little dinner most of the time. Almost all my exercise is done in the morning. So really only working out in the hot sun (which I did not do today) or sodium causes evening/night thirst. It would be nice to get away with a day like today occasionally, but, no, I am definitely thirsty.
I was 201 so I predict 206.2 in the morning. PLEASE let it be less than 208.3 -
Ate out 3 times today and about 1k above maintenance. Hit 201 this morning which is my new low but the fact that I am thirsty tonight confirms I will be on a decent uptick tomorrow. I seldom drink anything at night. I eat very little dinner most of the time. Almost all my exercise is done in the morning. So really only working out in the hot sun (which I did not do today) or sodium causes evening/night thirst. It would be nice to get away with a day like today occasionally, but, no, I am definitely thirsty.
I was 201 so I predict 206.2 in the morning. PLEASE let it be less than 208.
I got my wish. It is less than 208 by .04 pounds. 207.6.
My main talent in life seems to be the ability to gain twice as much water weight as the average person eating the same food.3 -
I ran numbers today and was really excited to see that I have a decent chance of hitting the milestone "75 pounds lost" by my birthday in December. Boyfriend also gave me permission to go ahead and get the gym membership, so that I can start building muscle and moving more. So I'll be doing that today.
It really feels like I've got the food issue largely worked out to where I'm comfortable. I've shrunk my capacity down so that I'm comfortable eating way less, and I have most of my food on the log so that logging it is simple now. Now that I can sort of slide that onto the back burner and keep an eye on it, I can work in exercise.
Exercise is really tricky for me because I do have fibromyalgia, and one of its symptoms is exercise intolerance. I wear out faster and recover much slower than the average person. Yesterday I put up a curtain rod. That meant that last night I could not raise my arm above my head even to brush my hair, and the soreness traveled across my back and recruited all my shoulder and neck muscles in the riot, and I had to take four ibuprofen and just go to bed early. So I can't work out at normal rates; I have to sneak up on it and get a few reps in, never break a sweat, never get sore, and just sneakily raise the amount I can do slowly over time. But my muscles really like it when I shove weights around a few times a week, and I can ride a stationary bike without seriously impacting my stand time, so a gym will definitely help me.
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