Share Your Day
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Today is my pre biopsy appointment to determine where they want to get the tissue to see how far the cancer has spread. Not going to say I’m not nervous but it is what it is. Scale says 200.1. Sigh could have given me the .2 today! Lol going to be a loooong day today.9
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Today is my pre biopsy appointment to determine where they want to get the tissue to see how far the cancer has spread. Not going to say I’m not nervous but it is what it is. Scale says 200.1. Sigh could have given me the .2 today! Lol going to be a loooong day today.
Sending you positive vibes my friend!0 -
conniewilkins56 wrote: »Today is my pre biopsy appointment to determine where they want to get the tissue to see how far the cancer has spread. Not going to say I’m not nervous but it is what it is. Scale says 200.1. Sigh could have given me the .2 today! Lol going to be a loooong day today.
Sending you positive vibes my friend!
Fingers crossed for you. Sending you so many good thoughts.1 -
Boyfriend woke me up at 3:30 am melting down. We got back to okay, and then I went back to bed from about 6-9 am because I had a headache from interrupted sleep. (That's the problem with being a migraineur; if anything disrupts the system and the routine, you get a headache.) It's still sort of vaguely present, but I was tired of being in bed and it had backed off enough for me to be okay.
He TRIED to get the drug test done the other day. Address on the paperwork turned out to be an abandoned building. When we searched on my phone with the company name, we found them but they said they didn't do hair tests any more. So we're going to try again today with another place that says they will do the test, and it's fairly close by.
I feel pretty rotten. I'm at full flow, and I'm cold and have no energy and feel very fragile, but all I have to do is sit in the car.2 -
Today is another rare gloomy day in otherwise sunny Florida!....no swimming today although it is very warm outside and humid....lots of football viewing planned for this afternoon...I recorded my lowest weight this morning, 254.4!....almost my own “ One der land”...meaning I am closing in on that 100 pound loss!...I can NOT believe I have been able to do this!...of course I have had some bad days, some hungry days, and days I have felt I could never stay with this!...and I still have pounds to lose!...but for today I am happy and I am in a good place mentally...I really might be able to do this....I always will be thankful for all of the motivation and encouragement from this wonderful group of Losers...4
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conniewilkins56 wrote: »Today is another rare gloomy day in otherwise sunny Florida!....no swimming today although it is very warm outside and humid....lots of football viewing planned for this afternoon...I recorded my lowest weight this morning, 254.4!....almost my own “ One der land”...meaning I am closing in on that 100 pound loss!...I can NOT believe I have been able to do this!...of course I have had some bad days, some hungry days, and days I have felt I could never stay with this!...and I still have pounds to lose!...but for today I am happy and I am in a good place mentally...I really might be able to do this....I always will be thankful for all of the motivation and encouragement from this wonderful group of Losers...
Great job! Loosing 100lbs is no small feat!2 -
We've had a pretty quiet day overall. He got up at two and wrote til I got up at seven, and then ate breakfast and went to bed, napped, got up, had lunch, and then napped again, ate dinner, read some coding books after dinner, and went up at seven to lie down. He may sleep or he may come back down. His new anti-anxiety med is rather sedating, and I hope he adapts to it. Calm and awake would be my goal here. (grin)
I got done what I wanted to for a Sunday; hair washed (it's a project when it's hip=length) and the sheets changed on the beds. Laundry got caught up yesterday, and I've set up the week's medications, so we're good. I still have another large glass of water and, shoot me now, 750 more calories to eat. Gahh. Hate this. I had dinner and I am so very much not hungry.2 -
When I took my diet break in early summer, the first few days I could not hardly eat the extra calories...then it was “ Katie bar the door “ and I was on a wicked 6 or 7 day binge.....the last 5 days I settled down and got control of myself!...experience and hindsight are wonderful learning tools....my next break I will be taking at the end of the year and I plan on having a much better plan....right now I am very satisfied again, motivated and have finally broken the plateau I fought with almost all summer long...I still have over 60 ( or 70 lbs ) to go so I don’t think a diet break is really necessary at this time....I am energetic, my hunger is mostly satisfied and I seem to be in a good place mentally as far as binges go... I don’t want to do anything right now to upset my applecart!3
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I started walking again today!!
A couple of days ago, the elevator in our building broke down. It was the push I needed to starting some exercise again, after years. Today, I tried walking to my mothers home and back, for the first time in years! And it worked.
Well,..sorta. The reason I had stopped working out for quite some time now is that I suffer from vascular claudication in both feet. I do have a major (~55%) blockage on my left thigh artery, which my doctor thinks is also the main culprit for a stroke I went through some years ago. Chain smoking, a diet consisting exclusively of junk food and a sedentary job - and life - certainly didn't help at all. Caveat emptor!!
Anyway, the result is that walking - something that I immensely enjoy(ed) btw - is extremely painful to both of my feet. Even for small distances. The symptoms abate as soon as I sit down (although the first minute after sitting is even more painful, due to the blood rushing back to my veins). You can imagine that this is somewhat aggravating, especially since quitting smoking has brought back a good chunk of my endurance. And, I seriously love walking. (growing up/living right next to a park helps too)
So, today my feet were killing me, but I soldiered on. I think I can handle the pain at this level, and I suspect that losing 80+ pounds has helped with that a lot. So, I decided to start walking again. Every other day for starters, 30 minutes look manageable. Wish me luck, I'm gonna need it!!
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My husband got another series of injections in his spine this morning....the shots he got in his knee and hip a couple of weeks ago have really helped decrease the pain he had...last week was the best he has felt in almost a year!...less pain for him = less stress for me!....win win.....maybe the RA will give him a break for awhile....I did grocery shopping, hauled everything in the house and put stuff away, went swimming and fixed lunch and dinner and cleaned up the kitchen....
Grands finally started school online today and daughter is still teaching from home...
For today, all is good in my world!4 -
@conniewilkins56
That’s wonderful news for you! We all desperately need a break once in a while!
I’ve spent my day on the road. I left home at 8 this morning heading to my Doctors appointment in the northern part of the state (I live in the south). The state park system has this VIPP program where if you visit 15 specified parks and 5 optional ones, then mail a stamped card back in you get a good discount on your next stay. So I took the scenic route up and drove the 2 lane instead of the interstate but got 2 of the more remote parks in going up and picked up 2 more. Now it’s 7:30 and I still have around 4 hours until I get home 😣 but it was a really nice drive with no traffic to fight-I hated getting to where I was going and having to get on the freeway as traffic as always in this area was a nightmare.
Going home won’t be so bad though even if I’ll be taking the freeway all the way ad I’m on the “edge of civilization” and heading south through the rural part if the state.
Meanwhile I made this trip because I wanted to see my doctor in person as she’s been such an encouragement in this weight loss journey of mine. She’s a wonderful doctor whp remembers me personally and all these little details like my house renovations that makes her a friend even if I only see her once a year and I knew she’d be ecstatic.
Not only was she ecstatic, she actually teared up in happiness! I’ve never had a doctor cry with joy because of something I did before lol she said it made her week!5 -
Great news from you, too!...I love my doctor because he gets teary eyed , too!1
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What a weekend.
Friday, we (me, my husband, and our best friend) began our road trip, and drove from MD to MI. It was a long day, but a fun drive. I snacked WAY too much on crappy/amazing car snacks, lol. We spent Saturday there, saw my husband's brother and wife, and got to play with our adorable 2 year old niece. She has so much energy. It was so much fun - we usually only get to see her once a year. Sunday we drove from MI to MN, a much shorter driving day (but just as many junk food snacks lol).
I snacked WAY too much, and was uncomfortably full each day. And...I didn't enjoy it. (I mean, I enjoyed it enough to do it 3 days in a row, but it didn't feel great). I was worried that I'd be tempted to keep going, but honestly I couldn't wait to arrive and not have the snack temptation anymore (or have to feel so full anymore). Now that I'm home, I'm eating more normal amounts of healthier food on a more normal schedule. I'm not logging this week, but my goal is to avoid that too-full feeling.
Tomorrow is my grandma's funeral, and will be a tough day. I'm excited to see my friends and family, but sure wish it was under different circumstances. Honestly I think the hardest part will be not being able to hug them. I'm not planning on doing anything tomorrow except resting, sleeping, and making sure my mom does the same.
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Things are pretty good here. Got my voter registration changed, and now I just have to get the address changed on my driver's licence.2
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Well today I took the plunge.
As I have said a few times I am working towards my goal weight to be eligible for plastic surgery to remove all the excess skin I have. One of the requirements for wound care is to be tobacco free for at least 2 months before and after surgery to promote healing. I have quit smoking a few times (years at a time) but this time I was struggling with the motivation to put them down this time. No particular reason but I just couldn't muster the strength to do it.
As a good therapist I looked at myself and decided to reach out for help. I saw my dr and she prescribed a medication to help me quit. I was going to start taking the med on Monday but I decided this morning that today was the day. I took my first dose this morning. It supposed to make cigarettes taste bad and the craving to smoke go away. I had one when I got to work, more from habit than from a real desire. It didn't taste any different. It is now 1pm and I haven't had another. I haven't really even wanted one. There have been some times that I thought about it but not in a I need to smoke right now but in a hmm I haven't been outside in a while way. I may just take a little walk.
One day at a time. If I can loose more than 200lbs I sure as heck can quit smoking.5 -
One day at a time. If I can loose more than 200lbs I sure as heck can quit smoking.
@gewel321 You bet. Take this slowly, you are a veteran in this anyway. You know exactly what quitting smoking entails, and you just have to put your knowledge to practice. Those cigs don't have a chance really!!
Funny thing, this mentally works the other way around for me. As a chain smoker for 25 years, quitting smoking cold turkey six months ago was what gave me motivation to start working on my weight. If I could quit smoking three packs a day, I could certainly re-organize my blubber into an appropriate size and consistency!
Stay the course, you got this!
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Today was yet another over-goal day for me calorie-wise. I've been having way too many of those lately! My main issue has been social eating - I spent last weekend with my parents, my mom stayed with me three days this week, and then both parents visited again today. Whenever we're together, we eat out A LOT and when my mom visits, she buys junk food and then leaves it at my house. I haven't figured out how to handle these situations - on the one hand, it's pretty much impossible to eat restaurant food two meals a day and stay under my calorie goal. On the other hand, I don't want to tell my parents I'm watching my calories and ask that we not go out to eat, because then they will turn into the Calorie Police and I'll never be able to eat anything "unhealthy" in their presence without hearing comments on it. My parents are both slim and my dad in particular has been quite insensitive about my weight in the past. So for now, I'm keeping quiet and just trying not to go overboard - turned down the chips with my sandwich at lunch and didn't eat the appetizer at dinner. I love spending time with my parents, but I'm ready for a few weeks apart so I can see results again!1
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Had only 3 cigarettes yesterday. 2 at 9am and 1 at 6pm. Only had 1 today around 5pm in response to some stress happening. I went to my workout class this morning and it was weird not to smoke on the way and right after. I’m finding this much harder than the calorie restriction. The complete chaos that is my life doesn’t help much. Continuing on with one day at a time at this point.4
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Finally got the paint so that I can touch up where the electricians cut holes in the walls to run the extra lines. (With two people working/schooling from home, we wanted enough carrying capacity.) I did the master bedroom this morning, and did the area in the corner of the library where we put in a four slot outlet for the coffee bar. Once that dries I'll put the outlet cover back on and hang the floating shelf we bought on that wall, so that I can display some of my historical jugs and mugs there. However, I'm kind of keeping an eye on the door for the earthquake wax to get delivered. I have two cats, and one is fond of racing about the house at high speed, and believes that if the cat can jump to it, the cat belongs there, regardless of what might be on the shelf. So those ceramics will get waxed down.1
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Water weight is back to killing me again this week; its got my trend screwed up and back up to 221 on happyscale *sigh*
Meanwhile, I'm trying a page out of @NovusDies book: I plan to spent tomorrow winterizing my yard, putting in flower bulbs, and whatever else I can find to do outside. So I'm trying to eat at or maybe a little above maintenance today to go with where I've been slipping above deficit but staying below maintenance most of this week, and see if that will give me more energy without wiping me out tomorrow.
Course, since I had a coffee coming home from Walmart this evening, its probably going to be 4 AM before I get to sleep tonight, which will likely cut into my morning, but then again, its supposed to be down next to 30 tonight anyway, so I'll have to wait until it warms up to do anything tomorrow morning as it is!
Now just hoping that tonight isn't like last night. I fell asleep sometime between 11:30 and 12, but found myself wide awake at 4 am, trying to go back to sleep. I almost gave up on it before I finally drifted back off; I knew if I got up at 4 AM, I'd be dragging by lunch, so I'm glad I did get back to sleep, though that interruption did have its affects today (hence the afternoon coffee!)2 -
Today was much better than yesterday....I went swimming, did some chores, ran errands and fixed dinner....itchy eyes and stuffy nose feels better than taking the sinus meds made me feel!1
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Today's been better. He only had one flashback where he was yelling and crying and wanting to die to make the pain stop. He was able to eat today, and I'm sure that will help him, and was able to go into his home office and check his email. This is pretty good progress.
I.... am okay. The cold has settled down to a slightly stuffed up nose and a lot more fatigue than usual. I'm feeling foggier, too, and often find myself talking myself through the steps of what I'm doing aloud.
Nyx caught a cricket, and walked around calling about it before eating it. At least I know she'll yell if she catches a mouse. (Both my cats are females and have a call that is a upward trill which I translate as "Kittens! Mama has food! Come out kittens!" which they use when walking around with a toy in their mouth. We always praise them as mighty hunters.
It's getting much colder here once the sun goes down, too. It's the season, it's time. I am starting to change my clothes every day in the small upstairs bathroom with the little heater running. That way my feet don't get cold. And I have Raynaud's phenomenon in my feet, and it is not very fun if they decide they are cold. It hurts.2 -
We got back from a quick trip. I was over a few days but nothing radically stupid.
Found out I may not enjoy hiking in the Smoky Mountain Park. Both trails I went on were highly active with other people. We never went more than 30 yards without encountering other groups. It was a there and back so the groups were near us in the same direction and we passed at least 300 people who were going the other direction. There were people who were struggling, people way overdressed for hiking, and young kids crying because they were tired/bored. It was touristy.
At my level of fitness I find it comfortable to OCCASIONALLY see a few people while hiking. It lets me know if I get into trouble there is a good chance it will be hours not days before I get help. Being on a crowded trail is not really hiking to me though.1 -
Definitely!
I had an opportunity to go to Yellowstone back in 2007, but I was by myself and wasn't in the shape I'm in now, so I stuck to the main areas, but that touristy feel kind of put a damper on the enjoyment of the park. Like you said, @NovusDies , I don't mind passing someone once in a while - especially when hiking in the cell phone dead zone that is large parts of WV - because of the safety factor (though my dad worries to death about me hiking and walking, scared I'm going to be mugged or attacked), but when its a bunch of people? That takes away from being able to just lose myself in the scenery.
As for my day today? It's shaping up to be like the last few days, which is a fight with a low mood and lack of will power or incentive. I'm starting to realize that a large part of what I have been calling "tired" is definitely mental and not physical, but that mental fatigue is just as difficult to deal with. I have all sorts of things that need to be done, but getting the mental energy to start them is exhausting in and of itself. That's also part of the reason I've found myself pretty quiet here on the forums lately.
I DID get the high parts of my yard cut back yesterday - hopefully will be it, though I might need to hit it one more time with the riding mower if we get the prolonged warm spell in the forecast - and the garden boxes fences down and put away and some cleaning up of the yard done, the lawn ornaments and wind chimes put away, the bird feeders out, the ladders put away (my mother borrows them and then never hangs them back up), and more of my house plants re-potted. I'm down to one but ran out of dirt again, so it will have to wait until I can get to Lowe's. I also got the gas out of one of my push mowers.
I still need to get the gas out of the remaining mower, clean the straw out of my building, get the windows put into that building and the siding on at least one side, the dog kennel I plan to use as a chicken run up, the chicken house put together, the gas out of the riding mower and the battery out of it brought into the house (though I'll wait another week or two on that in case I have to hit the yard one more time), the tulip, daffodil, and lily bulbs put into the ground, crawl under the house and check on the little heater I have under there to keep water pipes from freezing, clean off the back porch area so I have a place to stack pellets, wire the out building so I actually have lights in there, and make that lantern pole I bought stuff for before the camping trip in two weeks.
Then there's the indoor work that needs done - I desperately need to dust and spray for spiders, the house needs vacuumed again, the bathroom needs cleaned, I've got a couple of sewing projects to do, pumpkin to cut up and get canned, not to mention finish up my Christmas program for the church.....
*sigh* and just thinking of all that makes me so tired. And of course, then there's the fight to try to stick to my deficit because I've been blowing that most days, which is dangerous as I had switched to a 500 calorie deficit to try to ease into maintenance but its not working and the drive to snack is killing me to the point where I know I've been over maintenance a few days this week. I've been retaining water, leaving me feeling puffy, and I just have such a hard time concentrating on anything. I find myself looking for mindless games to play where I can just let my mind wander.
And I know this is depression I'm dealing with, but that doesn't stop the stupid critical side of myself from making me feel guilty because I don't get all this work done in a "timely" manner or sticking to my deficit like I'm supposed to....*sigh*
On the flip side, the letting my mind wander bit has gotten the characters in my head talkative lately - they've actually given me a huge amount of information in the last couple of weeks that I'd been trying to figure out for years; now if they would give me the DETAILS so I can actually get a plotline together, and then if they'd be kind enough to actually give me DIALOG perhaps I might actually be able to get something down on paper?!!!
Of course not. And the biggest dab-blamed problem? I can't get a map of this world figured out that clicks, which is what the best friend complains about......(Yes, guys, I'm thrilled that you finally gave me a rough timeline; that helps immensely, yes, but I need a ever-lovin' stinkin' map too!)
*sigh* Of course when it comes to writing, while I'd love to be able to write fiction, I can't seem to get anything down. I'll pull up Word or a notebook and a pencil and tell myself just to start, that I can clean it up later, but nothing comes; I can't get started at all and end up just frustrated. I can come up with a basic overview; its like I know what I want to happen, but I can't figure out how to write it out scene by scene or come up with the connecting details that are needed to get from point A to point B.
*sigh* Ah well, its probably for the best anyway. Most people would think I need on medication if I have "characters" talking to me, and its not like there aren't already thousands of fantasy style writers out there with all kinds of worlds to play in. And while our characters are quite dear to me (including the best friend's characters, and yes, Currin, that means you too *sigh* egotistical showoff....... ahem) I don't think I do justice in trying to explain them to others, either.
Meanwhile, today is church day, so I need to finish drying my hair (shouldn't take too long now with as short as it is), get dressed and get down there to run through my piano piece for this morning.2 -
I am at the point where I need to do a solid mapbuilding and some family trees for the novel in my head. I need to run the trees back about six generations too, because ultimately everyone's related in the nobility, and it MATTERS.0
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I went to the ER this past Wednesday for a high heart rate (148). They did an EKG, chest x-ray, and found that I now have CHF and an Atrial Flutter to go along with my AFIB. They gave me medicine in IV to lower the heart rate but it kept spiking. Stayed in the Er overnight (went at noon) got admitted and moved to a floor Thursday afternoon. The cardiologist said I would have a visit from an Electro Physicist about fixing my atrial flutter. He came and said Friday they would do an Ablation, they went through my groin and find the part of the heart that causes the flutter and burn it to stop the signal. I was scared to death! All went well I came home yesterday. I'm doing good but have to work harder on low sodium and watch my fluid intake. It's one day at a time but I will survive this.6
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Yikes @southernskeeter you take care of yourself!!2
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AlexandraFindsHerself1971 wrote: »I am at the point where I need to do a solid mapbuilding and some family trees for the novel in my head. I need to run the trees back about six generations too, because ultimately everyone's related in the nobility, and it MATTERS.
@AlexandraFindsHerself1971
It absolutely matters!
And my problem is I've got the Fay and then I have mortal races, but my Fay have been completely monopolizing the conversation with their history (especially my Unseely King who turns out not to be so Unseely (well, depending on whether you consider Unseely to be evil or Unseely to mean unblessed in that he's had a LOT of very terrible things happen to the poor guy)). My Unseely King has went from being a second hand bad guy evil neutral type to one of the chief primary characters in the story world I have, and has gone from being a bad guy to a tragic good guy almost anti-hero type (and the anti-hero bit keeps sliding the more he lets out.....) And then there's his kids, his grandkids, his in-laws, King Oberon of the Seely Court and all HIS relations, the other courts (and I STILL need 4 more courts to round out the 12 that is supposed to be in the Fay Alliance!)
Then there's the mortal races which I really need to get a good solid grip on the timelines for, figure out how fay time and mortal time relate to each other since they aren't synced one to one, or at least, go in and out of being synced, and figure out how to get the dwarves broken completely free from Tolkien's dwarves, and keep the elves from going too far into being Kryn elves, and convince Raistlin that he has to change his name, and get the Erlking story and how it relates to Queen Mab (who, after finding out her background, I realized wouldn't talk to me for reason that she's completely diabolically evil-step-mother-queen-in-snow-white evil and is masquerading as being a good person on the alliance, no less), then there's the dragon story line, the vampire storyline, how this all relates back to the secret north king, and figuring out how to get the original bad guy back into prominence because he's taken a backseat lately to other characters we've created, but he has such a primary roll in the primordial ancient history that there's no way he's just sitting on the sidelines in the modern time.......
And finishing out the original pantheon and what happened to those guys because they aren't in the picture anymore; the bets friend is waiting impatiently on that because the kingdom she is formulating needs that information, not to mention the stinkin' map!0 -
I now think I am in the Twilight Zone!1
