the BEST message i have ever gotten :-)
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Buffalo Wild Wings is a horrible place for a first date. There isn't anything romantic about that setting whatsoever. I'm not sure why a guy would pick to watch football at BWW for their first date.
I think after-work drinks at a nice pub or lounge is the ideal first date. Somewhere that doesn't have so much visual stimuli (TV screens everywhere, scantly dressed waitress, etc) so you can focus on the conversation and build that romantic vibe.
I don't know that the setting matters all that much. I wouldn't choose a McDonald's for a first date but if you're into someone you're into them and vice versa. I had a great first date that involved meeting at the grocery store to do some shopping and then ice cream in the parking lot.
Agreed. The idea of a romantic date with someone I haven't even met creeps me out - especially since I don't even know if I'm attracted to them or not.
Though what's with the third degree in here? I had to loosen a few buttons geez.
As far as "You should tell someone in person blah blah" WHY? It's not my job to fix their ish, I don't give a damn if they figure their *kitten* out or not. I'm just trying to get away as fast and far as possible.0 -
I think after-work drinks at a nice pub or lounge is the ideal first date. Somewhere that doesn't have so much visual stimuli (TV screens everywhere, scantly dressed waitress, etc) so you can focus on the conversation and build that romantic vibe.
That's a good default option.
I prefer something active. I'm always a fan of an outdoorsy late afternoon walk somewhere with good scenery. There's a limited window weather wise for that sort of date in most places. A place like Los Angeles or San Diego could allow you to do that year round. Ice skating can be a good one too. Ice skating sets up the hand hold well, which can set up the first kiss.
What's most important is pre-selection. A lot of the time, people go on first dates that they have no business going on, which just creates a bad experience.0 -
some of my best first dates have been at places i consider "fun" ;-)
i've had dates at BWW. but, i don't really look at first dates as romantic or as anything more than a meet and greet, quick size each other up.....
my FAVORITE first date was at a driving range/ batting cage. we were there for an hour and we both had a TON of fun!!!! my worst first date was at starbucks. :-)0 -
I'm a fan of the active date as well, or the default coffee date. My favorite first date ever was a round of putt putt, followed by coffee in their little diner. It was just a fun way to get to know him. I have had successful first dates that started with coffee, followed by a trip to the sports bar to watch either a basketball or football game. The difference was that we were invested in getting to know each other while drinking coffee...once we got to the sports bar, we continued the conversation, but also had some competitive spirit thrown in.
I really don't like "romantic" first dates, because it's a first date. You don't know how you're going to feel about that person and I don't like to be forced into that kind of situation.0 -
i don't really look at first dates as romantic or as anything more than a meet and greet, quick size each other up.....I really don't like "romantic" first dates, because it's a first date. You don't know how you're going to feel about that person and I don't like to be forced into that kind of situation.
Both of these quotes speak to mindset issues.
I prefer my “meet & greets” to be done in person. I’d rather my “meet and greets” be done through the course of my regular day to day activities. I don’t want to be one on one with someone, and having them think it is a meet and greet and me think it is a date. Unaligned expectations lead to poor outcomes, and if I’m shelling out my hard earned money, even in small amounts (my first dates are usually inexpensive), I want a quality outcome. That is why I see having the “meet and greet” phase as best to be done through a friend of friend network intro, an exercise class or some other mutual activity that we both enjoy.
As for “romantic” first dates, if the “meet and greet” phase was done in person first, the first date is really the 2nd time you are seeing each other, but it is truly the first extended one on one time. A screen out can easily be done in an in person meet and greet. The first date should be about looking to have some good times together, and there’s excitement behind romance.0 -
i always make sure we are on the same page for the first time we meet. i'm ok with it being called a date or not being called a date. it can last 30 min or an hour or longer.
i've had first dates that have not stopped at an hour or two. i've had ones that go for HOURS because we had so much fun. but, it all started with a "meet and greet" kind of dealio.
my time is limited. i screen out via phone conversations and first and second dates. but, i am flexible. i will offer to pay. i don't have to be treated to a romantic meal on the first or second date to figure out if i want to date someone :-)0 -
i don't really look at first dates as romantic or as anything more than a meet and greet, quick size each other up.....I really don't like "romantic" first dates, because it's a first date. You don't know how you're going to feel about that person and I don't like to be forced into that kind of situation.
Both of these quotes speak to mindset issues.
"mindset issues" You call it. That's rich. Anyone that disagrees with you must have mindset issues because people can't possibly just have different perfectly acceptable outlooks - right?0 -
Both of these quotes speak to mindset issues.
I prefer my “meet & greets” to be done in person. I’d rather my “meet and greets” be done through the course of my regular day to day activities. I don’t want to be one on one with someone, and having them think it is a meet and greet and me think it is a date. Unaligned expectations lead to poor outcomes, and if I’m shelling out my hard earned money, even in small amounts (my first dates are usually inexpensive), I want a quality outcome. That is why I see having the “meet and greet” phase as best to be done through a friend of friend network intro, an exercise class or some other mutual activity that we both enjoy.
As for “romantic” first dates, if the “meet and greet” phase was done in person first, the first date is really the 2nd time you are seeing each other, but it is truly the first extended one on one time. A screen out can easily be done in an in person meet and greet. The first date should be about looking to have some good times together, and there’s excitement behind romance.
Ok, I can agree to the romantic date as a 2nd time you see someone. Ideally a meet and greet would happen in real life before the first date, but not all of us are having that luck, and not all of us have friends that can set us up. I just moved to this area 3 years ago. I have no family in the area and I have slowly made great friends. You can't just jump in and say "hook me up!". I've had a couple offer for me to meet mutual friends and in the end these didn't work out (one was 18 yrs older, the other was long distance).
In regards to meeting men in real life, it's happened a few times as well but no overwhelming success. I think part of that has to do with men not wanting to approach when my kids are present. I've taken that into account, and have done more things on my own (running errands, going to the bookstore, Starbucks, local pubs, etc). But, again, I'm just having no luck. It seems that when I start a conversation, his girlfriend/wife is quick to walk up (yes, I look for a ring first). I do appreciate the info you men provide on here, so at least I'm polishing up on my conversation skills by talking to them.0 -
i don't meet men in public. it just never happens. for one, ALL of my friends are married with kids. ALL of them!
two, 99% of the time i'm out with my kids.
three, i don't really send any kind of " i'm available" vibe ;-) i've been told by men that even without my kids, i don't LOOK available. to most men i look like i should be taken.......
so, my first dates have come to be on the relaxed side. maybe it's wrong. but, it is what it is :-) and i'm ok with things the way they are right now.........0 -
My preference for first dates is at a sports bar, with a game on the TV. I feel it takes a lot of the pressure off to have something to look up at and discuss (if for some reason there are uncomfortable silences, or any awkwardness). I also like sports and drinking beer, so all around it works for me. Ordering food is optional.
I don't like anything remotely romantic for a first date, especially a fancy, candle lit restaurant. At first date start time, the guy is usually a stranger to me. Anything that invites hand holding or touching or "coupleness" at the outset kind of creeps me out. This includes things like ice skating. (The romantic dates in the movies always seem to include ice skating.) Of course, hopefully by the end of the first date I have changed my mind!
For me, I can't imagine anything more depressing than meeting a first date for coffee. Blech. But then again, I'm not a big fan of sitting around Starbucks for any reason. I like to get my coffee and move on.0 -
I think part of that has to do with men not wanting to approach when my kids are present. I've taken that into account, and have done more things on my own (running errands, going to the bookstore, Starbucks, local pubs, etc).two, 99% of the time i'm out with my kids.
Nothing says "I'm not available" faster to most men than being out with kids. Even if the kids aren't your own (nephews, nieces and kids of your friends), their presence would also say this. Because most men would assume the kids are yours.
Single men who don't have kids are usually really bad matches for single women who have kids.0 -
see!! i scream, "not available." LOL!!!! oh except for the that whole " just sex" part. guys seem totally ok with pursuing me for " just sex." :-/ SMH
Nothing says "I'm not available" faster to most men than being out with kids. Even if the kids aren't your own (nephews, nieces and kids of your friends), their presence would also say this. Because most men would assume the kids are yours.
Single men who don't have kids are usually really bad matches for single women who have kids.0 -
Nothing says "I'm not available" faster to most men than being out with kids. Even if the kids aren't your own (nephews, nieces and kids of your friends), their presence would also say this. Because most men would assume the kids are yours.
Single men who don't have kids are usually really bad matches for single women who have kids.
I think this is true for younger men. Sometime between 30-40 this becomes less of an issue. I know in my 20s I joked that kids are just a socially acceptable form of STD. A negative outcome from having too much fun one night. You never completely get rid of them, they take a lot of money, you're constantly seeing doctors about them and you're always nervous how new partners will respond when they know you have them.
As I get older, I don't see kids as a "problem" any more. It does make it more difficult to get to know someone as her time is more focused on issues that concern her kids but the kids provide a lot of entertainment and social activities themselves.
I will say though that if the kids are with a woman, it makes it harder to approach as you have no privacy and the woman is likely to be more focused on seeing where the kids are/what they are doing than on making small talk. Having children with you also increases the chances that the woman is married or will be perceived as being married.0 -
It does make it more difficult to get to know someone as her time is more focused on issues that concern her kids but the kids provide a lot of entertainment and social activities themselves.
Right away, when a man is dealing with a woman with kids, he's not the #1 priority of the woman. There's no childless couple time, and I think childless couple time is some of the best time in a relationship if you take the really long view.0 -
It does make it more difficult to get to know someone as her time is more focused on issues that concern her kids but the kids provide a lot of entertainment and social activities themselves.
Right away, when a man is dealing with a woman with kids, he's not the #1 priority of the woman. There's no childless couple time, and I think childless couple time is some of the best time in a relationship if you take the really long view.
That is a completely false statement and very narrow viewpoint. When I start a new relationship, the man will not meet my children. We could go several weeks to months before he does and still have plenty of time to see each other. The mindset that you are showing is very common amongst younger single childless men, though. I have met many single men that have absolutely no problem with me being a single mother and realize that while we may not be able to be spontaneous, we can still have a great time together (without the children present and eventually with the children).
I think that the problem with meeting men in real life is mostly what dbrightwell explained. Men assume that women with children are married, or there is a lack of privacy and they do not want to approach her with children in tow. That is completely understandable, because I feel the same way when I see a man with children. It's very hard to flirt with a man when his children are present. You just feel dirty.0 -
It does make it more difficult to get to know someone as her time is more focused on issues that concern her kids but the kids provide a lot of entertainment and social activities themselves.
Right away, when a man is dealing with a woman with kids, he's not the #1 priority of the woman. There's no childless couple time, and I think childless couple time is some of the best time in a relationship if you take the really long view.
Not only do I disagree with this, I think it is a rather selfish point of view. I have dated several women with children. You are not going to be able to go out on a whim but that doesn't mean you aren't going to be able to go out and spend time doing things as a couple. If anything, the woman with kids is going to be much more appreciative of this time because it is much more rare.
I think it is selfish because it assumes the goal of getting to know someone and building a relationship is to be the immediate #1 priority. I'd prefer not to be the #1 priority as that comes across as desperate and clingy. That doesn't mean that it can work out with every single parent. If a woman never has time for a date or always has to cancel because of the kids then that is a problem. However, if you are on a fourth or fifth date and she is hiring a sitter or calling in favors from friends or family to spend time with you, that is a far better indicator of interest than if she is single and agrees to meet you out for a romantic dinner at your expense.0 -
It does make it more difficult to get to know someone as her time is more focused on issues that concern her kids but the kids provide a lot of entertainment and social activities themselves.
Right away, when a man is dealing with a woman with kids, he's not the #1 priority of the woman. There's no childless couple time, and I think childless couple time is some of the best time in a relationship if you take the really long view.
That is a completely false statement and very narrow viewpoint. When I start a new relationship, the man will not meet my children. We could go several weeks to months before he does and still have plenty of time to see each other. The mindset that you are showing is very common amongst younger single childless men, though. I have met many single men that have absolutely no problem with me being a single mother and realize that while we may not be able to be spontaneous, we can still have a great time together (without the children present and eventually with the children).
I think that the problem with meeting men in real life is mostly what dbrightwell explained. Men assume that women with children are married, or there is a lack of privacy and they do not want to approach her with children in tow. That is completely understandable, because I feel the same way when I see a man with children. It's very hard to flirt with a man when his children are present. You just feel dirty.
Agree completely with you Run. The last woman I dated, I didn't meet her child for several months, and was actually on accident. We had no issues finding time to do everything together without her child around. After that, we still had alone time but started also doing things that involved her child. It was nice.0 -
i don't really look at first dates as romantic or as anything more than a meet and greet, quick size each other up.....I really don't like "romantic" first dates, because it's a first date. You don't know how you're going to feel about that person and I don't like to be forced into that kind of situation.
Both of these quotes speak to mindset issues.
I prefer my “meet & greets” to be done in person. I’d rather my “meet and greets” be done through the course of my regular day to day activities. I don’t want to be one on one with someone, and having them think it is a meet and greet and me think it is a date.
DM- Several women here are telling you that they don't like romantic first dates and yet you think it's a mindset issue? Perhaps it's a gender issue and you are being so headstrong that your way is right that you could be alienating your own dates. Just some food for thought.
Oh and we all know you prefer off-line meeting and dates. In theory I think we all would, but that isn't always realistic in modern times...so please don't be the grandpa on the stoop yelling at us kids that things were different 'back in the olden days". Embrace technology or be it's roadkill.
And as far as the dating with kids thing, I think we can all agree that we are all allowed to have a preference. But don't forget that everyone on this board has a different lifestyle and you sometimes come across (I assume unintentionally) as insulting by saying that they are no longer relevant because they have kids, etc., etc.
The direction this thread took disturbs me a bit, I'm not trying to start a fight. Plus, I know DM can handle the heat0 -
DM- Several women here are telling you that they don't like romantic first dates and yet you think it's a mindset issue? Perhaps it's a gender issue and you are being so headstrong that your way is right that you could be alienating your own dates. Just some food for thought.
Oh and we all know you prefer off-line meeting and dates. In theory I think we all would, but that isn't always realistic in modern times...so please don't be the grandpa on the stoop yelling at us kids that things were different 'back in the olden days". Embrace technology or be it's roadkill.
And as far as the dating with kids thing, I think we can all agree that we are all allowed to have a preference. But don't forget that everyone on this board has a different lifestyle and you sometimes come across (I assume unintentionally) as insulting by saying that they are no longer relevant because they have kids, etc., etc.
The direction this thread took disturbs me a bit, I'm not trying to start a fight. Plus, I know DM can handle the heat
It depends on the definition of romantic. I'm not talking about an expensive restaurant dinner with soft candlelight. But there are ways to enhance the ambiance. I think the physical attraction component should be explored. I need to know if someone finds me attractive.
Technology should be embraced when its impact is materially beneficial. I think there's a lot of dissatisfaction with the online dating sites. I think something you said sums it up. "In theory I think we all would (prefer an offline meeting)". If there's a preference for an offline meeting, doesn't an offline meeting put someone in the best position to succeed based on that logic? Wouldn't someone want to best position themselves to succeed? We've explored some of the mechanical issues on here. I would rather fewer, higher quality dates than more lower quality dates. I feel that online dating sites provide an avenue for two people to get together that really have no business getting together. It's much easier to meet, greet and screen someone out sooner if you meet in person first going through the day to day activities. Extended one on one time (and by extended, I mean more than 10-15 mins) is best once you've past the screen out phase.
I readily admitted that I am a terrible fit for someone with kids due to my perspective and expectations. Pre-selection is the most important aspect of having a good date. Some dates can't be salvaged. The last date I went on was a failure in pre-selection, despite the fact that there was the right ambiance set. I've had times where I've had the same exact first date venue with different people and the dates were radically different.0 -
DM- Several women here are telling you that they don't like romantic first dates and yet you think it's a mindset issue? Perhaps it's a gender issue and you are being so headstrong that your way is right that you could be alienating your own dates. Just some food for thought.
Oh and we all know you prefer off-line meeting and dates. In theory I think we all would, but that isn't always realistic in modern times...so please don't be the grandpa on the stoop yelling at us kids that things were different 'back in the olden days". Embrace technology or be it's roadkill.
And as far as the dating with kids thing, I think we can all agree that we are all allowed to have a preference. But don't forget that everyone on this board has a different lifestyle and you sometimes come across (I assume unintentionally) as insulting by saying that they are no longer relevant because they have kids, etc., etc.
The direction this thread took disturbs me a bit, I'm not trying to start a fight. Plus, I know DM can handle the heat
I think we have different ideas on what is considered "romantic". A romantic 1st date would be somewhere with nice mood lighting, somewhere quiet, and just a place where two people can talk and not have to worry about a bunch of screaming sports fan. I don't do dinner on a first date (never have, never will), so a romantic dinner at a fancy restaurant with a bottle of wine and a flower on the table is out of the question.
I've found that I have to lead with my romantic foot or else I get put in the friend-zone. I've had good success setting the tone that I'm interested in something romantic and not just friendship.
People just have to do what works for them.0 -
I think there's a lot of dissatisfaction with the online dating sites. I think something you said sums it up. "In theory I think we all would (prefer an offline meeting)". If there's a preference for an offline meeting, doesn't an offline meeting put someone in the best position to succeed based on that logic?
I don't disagree that online dating can suck. The problem I have, and I assume others do also, is that I work and have a life... when am I supposed to meet these imaginary single men that are supposedly all around me? Should I just be roaming grocery store aisles or sit in Starbucks or a bar for hours on end hoping and wishing that someone I'm compatible with might walk in on that particular day? This is what I mean by "in theory" because IF that magically happened one day, then great, but otherwise I'm not holding my breath. DM- I'm all ears if you'd like to share your experiences about meeting women out and about. You're always preaching it, but we need realistic tips!0 -
I think there's a lot of dissatisfaction with the online dating sites. I think something you said sums it up. "In theory I think we all would (prefer an offline meeting)". If there's a preference for an offline meeting, doesn't an offline meeting put someone in the best position to succeed based on that logic?
I don't disagree that online dating can suck. The problem I have, and I assume others do also, is that I work and have a life... when am I supposed to meet these imaginary single men that are supposedly all around me? Should I just be roaming grocery store aisles or sit in Starbucks or a bar for hours on end hoping and wishing that someone I'm compatible with might walk in on that particular day? This is what I mean by "in theory" because IF that magically happened one day, then great, but otherwise I'm not holding my breath. DM- I'm all ears if you'd like to share your experiences about meeting women out and about. You're always preaching it, but we need realistic tips!
First off, think about the man you want to be with. Where would he hang out? Do you have common day to day activities with him? Take a close look at your day to day activities. Do they put you in contact with the men who you want? I'm not saying to have activities that are just for the purpose of meeting someone. The male equivalent of this is going to the typical meet market bar (loud and poor male-female ratio) vs. an exercise or a cooking class (much more female centric).
Men also work and have lives. Our time is just as scarce as yours.
The first thing I would do (and it is possible that you have done this already) is talk to all my friends in relationships. I'm sure you have female friends in relationships. Tell them that you are single and looking to date. Ask if they know any single men who would be a good fit for you. This task is so much easier for women than men. A single man with other male friends has to curry favor with his male friends' girlfriends to accomplish this.
Wherever you go, have open body language and smile. Watch men's body language. If a man smiles at you, smile back. That's an opener. I smile at every woman I find attractive and if she smiles back, I talk to her.0 -
ladies, if you all want to know what these men REALLY think about dating, just go read the relationship help forum at bodybuilding.com you'll probably never want to date again after hearing what men REALLY think!
mainly they're all about the sex. who will give it, how they will get it, and how fast and how often and how many women they need lined up to make sure they get it as often as they want. what they will SAY in order to get it, so forth and so on.
for ME, it does not matter in the least what the venue is. if someone grabs my hand at a sports bar it will mean just as much as if they grab my hand at starbucks or a 5 star restaurant with candles and everything....... it's the act and action, not the location or money spent. money means almost NOTHING to me. i would feel HIGHLY uncomfortable going to an expensive restaurant with someone i just met. and i'm the girl that was raised by nannies, in country clubs, driving a jag to high school.........
i can't say i enjoy online dating. because i don't. BUT, in my situation, i have zero chances of meeting someone in public. my town has very few single men, and NONE of my friends "know" anyone. i smile at people, i will talk to just about anyone :-) but, like i said, i usually have my kids and kids do not scream " hello, i'm single, ask for my phone number" ;-)
oh, and i never involve my kids if i start dating someone. i make sure we see each other as often as he'd like. there is plenty of time for " just grown ups." i might not be able to do SPUR of the moment, like as in " in one hour i want to pick you up and take you away for the weekend...." but i have dogs too, and they would be a bigger hassle to find pet care for than my kids would be!!!!!!!! so, the kids thing is kinda a moot point really. in your situation, you shouldn't date anyone that has ANYTHING they need to provide care for. i mean, i am kid free every other weekend, but i can't do sleep overs NOT because of my KIDS, but because of my dogs!!!!!!!!0 -
DM, you always act like offline dating and online dating are mutually exclusive. Just because someone has a profile on OkCupid and they browse at work for fifteen minutes doesn't mean they aren't still going out and doing this. What's wrong with having several baited lines at the same time? Yes, meeting in person is preferable for a lot of reasons but that doesn't mean we should just discount online dating entirely. Why the hell not do both, it's efficient. When I was on the lookout I met people both online and offline. PJ has a point too - you're always talking about how superior offline dating is and despite several people asking several times you have yet to actually share a success story - and there are at least people on this very forum that are currently coupled up, thanks to online dating. Instead you give some tips on how to make it happen, that's not the information that was requested so it really just looks an awful lot like deflection.
Mike, you hit the nail on the head, but not entirely meaning to. People do have differing opinions of romantic. Some people get that special flutter when they have a walk by the beach, and some people gain attraction through good natured sports centric trash talk. Everyone likes different things. I myself prefer more relaxed atmospheres. I have actually stopped dating people because they kept taking me to "romantic" places because I just ended up very uncomfortable the whole time and couldn't enjoy myself. So you should totally go for the type of date that makes you feel comfortable. Don't go to sports bars if that's not what you want. But some people will. They're just different, not wrong.0 -
THIS always THIS!!!
different does NOT mean WRONG!They're just different, not wrong.0 -
ladies, if you all want to know what these men REALLY think about dating, just go read the relationship help forum at bodybuilding.com you'll probably never want to date again after hearing what men REALLY think!
mainly they're all about the sex. who will give it, how they will get it, and how fast and how often and how many women they need lined up to make sure they get it as often as they want. what they will SAY in order to get it, so forth and so on.
I'm so glad someone else said it. I developed my opinion of what men want from reading men's sites, talking to my mostly-male coworkers, and talking to the guys who asked me out but things didn't work out.
Obviously all guys aren't like this (or I wouldn't have a boyfriend) but many (at least in the USA) seem to be.0 -
I think after-work drinks at a nice pub or lounge is the ideal first date. Somewhere that doesn't have so much visual stimuli (TV screens everywhere, scantly dressed waitress, etc) so you can focus on the conversation and build that romantic vibe.
Mike, it's not often that I agree with you but I do today! Very good point. One place I went on a first date was a smoothie shop. No TVs, very tiny, cozy corners.
Your date doesn't have to be candles and roses. But it shouldn't be in a loud bar either.0 -
just read this on a thread that is LONG and started about a year ago
"I had to wait 2 months til I got to **** my ex , Was frustrating but in the end worth it.. If your in a relationship with her be glad she didnt give it up after two nights.
If shes easy she wont be worth it
if shes worth it she wont be easy"
i guess this is a good way to weed out the guys just looking for sex, right? ;-)ladies, if you all want to know what these men REALLY think about dating, just go read the relationship help forum at bodybuilding.com you'll probably never want to date again after hearing what men REALLY think!
mainly they're all about the sex. who will give it, how they will get it, and how fast and how often and how many women they need lined up to make sure they get it as often as they want. what they will SAY in order to get it, so forth and so on.
I'm so glad someone else said it. I developed my opinion of what men want from reading men's sites, talking to my mostly-male coworkers, and talking to the guys who asked me out but things didn't work out.
Obviously all guys aren't like this (or I wouldn't have a boyfriend) but many (at least in the USA) seem to be.0 -
I think there's a lot of dissatisfaction with the online dating sites. I think something you said sums it up. "In theory I think we all would (prefer an offline meeting)". If there's a preference for an offline meeting, doesn't an offline meeting put someone in the best position to succeed based on that logic?
I don't disagree that online dating can suck. The problem I have, and I assume others do also, is that I work and have a life... when am I supposed to meet these imaginary single men that are supposedly all around me? Should I just be roaming grocery store aisles or sit in Starbucks or a bar for hours on end hoping and wishing that someone I'm compatible with might walk in on that particular day? This is what I mean by "in theory" because IF that magically happened one day, then great, but otherwise I'm not holding my breath. DM- I'm all ears if you'd like to share your experiences about meeting women out and about. You're always preaching it, but we need realistic tips!
First off, think about the man you want to be with. Where would he hang out? Do you have common day to day activities with him? Take a close look at your day to day activities. Do they put you in contact with the men who you want? I'm not saying to have activities that are just for the purpose of meeting someone. The male equivalent of this is going to the typical meet market bar (loud and poor male-female ratio) vs. an exercise or a cooking class (much more female centric).
Men also work and have lives. Our time is just as scarce as yours.
The first thing I would do (and it is possible that you have done this already) is talk to all my friends in relationships. I'm sure you have female friends in relationships. Tell them that you are single and looking to date. Ask if they know any single men who would be a good fit for you. This task is so much easier for women than men. A single man with other male friends has to curry favor with his male friends' girlfriends to accomplish this.
Wherever you go, have open body language and smile. Watch men's body language. If a man smiles at you, smile back. That's an opener. I smile at every woman I find attractive and if she smiles back, I talk to her.
DM, I do appreciate your attempt to answer the question, but I have to agree with Kit. This answer seems like a red herring. Of course, I understand men have lives too, I hear about the best places to meet guys and yes, everyone I know already knows I'm single and looking. Still nothing.
Other than school/work, I don't know of any recent couples that met simply because they 'ran into' one another in a public place. In fact, it's quite the opposite mostly because of technology...where can you go these days where anyone who is alone is not glued to their phone? No one even looks up enough to make eye contact anyway!
Again, I'm not a huge fan of online dating, but I find it to be a better platform because as stated in another thread (inspired by this one I think) at least everyone on a dating site is (or claims to be) single and dating, removing one big obstacle.0
This discussion has been closed.