^^^ went to playground and added six eccentric pullups just to say i did something upper-body flavoured. and walking lunges part of the way home. hey, it's dark. ain't no-one around in the park but teenagers getting stoned and snickering at one another

. . . i hope it was each other they were snickering at.

day 1 of deload week #4. i made the call between gym and rec centre, and bought ten visits to see me through july before i re-subscribe for a new year.

am i ever glad that i did. haven't been there since last sunday, and when i trucked upstairs, the place was transformed. the old fixed-peg single-unit bench is gone. the squat rack is gone. they now have not one, but TWO full cages, with the adjustable everything. two, count 'm; two.

it's deload week but the fact that i haven't benched yet and i missed on my press last night for 70 . . . both of these things were niggling me. so i tried again for my 70lb press, and it's just nope. i could claim various things like i just pressed yesterday, i started out with a ton of waiter carries, 3x15 presses with the women's bar, two sloth-slow and controlled eccentric pullups, 50lb rows, getups with 8lb kettlebell . . . but the fact is, i just don't have it just yet. this decides me that on friday i'm going to tell mr t i want to repeat this cycle's weights when the next cycle starts.

for bench as well as ohp. because i didn't have it for bench either - two reps at 80lb and the first fail of my life on the third rep. i refuse to call it the roll of shame, because i'm not bloody ashamed. but anyway, that's a long way off the 90 i was scheduled for, so bench gets a repeat as well.

now that i've made the decision i actually feel better than i did when i was still trying to nickel and dime myself and hang on to the idea of these weights.

i did deloaded squats at 65 and those were pretty okay.