Thoughts and Feelings
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I commented on your status, but I'll comment on it here, too.
I think you did amazing.You signed up, committed yourself, RAN some of it, and finished. Every runner starts somewhere, and that's not in first place. I wonder what time you would have done if you had attempted it fresh on day 1 on your journey? And now you have a time to beat next time!
I'm also wanting to do endurance running, and I am SO close to the weight I want to be to buy my running clothes, and I hope I can be brave enough to do a 5k to challenge myself before I know for sure I can run one! Did you have fun?1 -
I had a blast!! Before, during, and after! It wasn't until the next day when the results were published that I started feeling down about it. I don't regret doing it, and I know the next one I do will go much better!
My next major goal is to do a 5k and run the whole way by 02 Feb 2018, which will be the first anniversary of my weight loss/fitness journey.
I'm going to the gym after work today to continue my running program. I'm not letting some distracting feelings stop me from meeting my goals!
EDIT: Speaking of unrealistic expectations, I put my weight progress into a trend calculator and it told me I'd hit my honest to God final goal weight by the end of 2017.
I know I can't expect that because weight loss gets harder as you get closer to goal. My target is an average of 1 pound a week, long term. That would put me at goal weight in May 2019. Most likely I'll hit goal sometime before that.
But holy crow, goal weight by December??? The thought that it might even be a possibility is WILD.3 -
I think you did awesome!!!!1
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@thewindandthework , you beat your goal and it was your first race. Take your victory and be proud, then set a time goal for your next 5k. Comparing yourself to regular runners/competitors and feeling bad is unfair to yourself and how far you've come on your journey0
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Man was I down in the dumps yesterday! Thanks for your support everyone! I'm good today--proud of my accomplishments and excited to keep going!2
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@thewindandthework - You had 36 people watching your back! I think that's great. You know, even if you'd have been dead last, that would be impressive to me. I can't even imagine a 5K yet. Congratulations!1
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So this last weekend was Mother's Day and my birthday...I never realized how people assume rewarding or treating me with food (as a gift) is the best way to show their love or appreciation to me. I knew extra food would be on the menu for the weekend so I had planned for it, but in a way I'm sad. Over the next year I know I will change even more than I have, but FOOD will still be the reward of choice my friends and family will give. Not because they don't care to see the changes but perhaps food is easy? I'm not really ranting. I enjoyed my weekend and the food was good...I don't really like the way I felt this morning in the aftermath...but I'll go to the gym to today and all will be well. I need a better choice than food for celebrations. Ideas that won't break the bank?1
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I understand your problem! Food does seem to be the gift of choice for adults. And its made worse when those gifting you don't try to understand your request. I often get "one day won't hurt you" as a response to my diet needs. *sigh*
Do you like flowers? Maybe ask them to buy you a rose bush with the money they would have spent on food? then you'd have a tangible item to remind you of your success! Or even a tree or a bush or something.
if they insist on food, perhaps you could talk them into a cookout or a dinner at home, and provide them with a recipe that would fit within your diet budget? Ask for a healthy dessert? There are all kinds of ideas online from blackbean cakes to greek yogurt cheesecakes.
Maybe you could get them to agree to a day in a local park and a small picnic instead - which would give you a nice place to walk afterwards?
In any case, I wish you the best of luck, because I know it can be difficult! And one weekend really won't sidetrack you if you don't let it - and it sounds like you accommodated for it nicely and are getting right back on track. So congratulations for that!0 -
coolvstar650 wrote: »So this last weekend was Mother's Day and my birthday...I never realized how people assume rewarding or treating me with food (as a gift) is the best way to show their love or appreciation to me. I knew extra food would be on the menu for the weekend so I had planned for it, but in a way I'm sad. Over the next year I know I will change even more than I have, but FOOD will still be the reward of choice my friends and family will give. Not because they don't care to see the changes but perhaps food is easy? I'm not really ranting. I enjoyed my weekend and the food was good...I don't really like the way I felt this morning in the aftermath...but I'll go to the gym to today and all will be well. I need a better choice than food for celebrations. Ideas that won't break the bank?
Good insights there. Perhaps given time you can train your family to go away from high calorie foods as gifts. Can you think of any other delicacies you appreciate?0 -
I've had a pretty good last few days, which have been sorely needed - I've been pretty down for a bit. It didn't help at all, either, when I took a selfie, intending to see if I had an older picture to compare to for the other thread, and I cringed when I saw pictures of myself. I hate looking at pictures of me - I'm not photogenic at all! But I don't have an older pic, anyway - just one from 45 lbs and now those from 55 lbs. I'll hold onto to them for when I get the 75 lb mark. Maybe there will be an improvement, but then again, no amount of weight loss or cosmetics can change homely! lol
But today I'm feeling a little better emotionally. It's beautiful outside today and cooler and less humid, and I finally measured my waist and ahve seen a good improvement. And I had a decent weight loss this week - and I'm even down today from my recording day. I need these little perks and upbeat days - I tend toward melancholy and depression a lot - I think too much, I think, and I spend too much time alone. I really hoping that this job change and move home will help with that, as well as future success in weight loss.
Anyway, that's the thoughts on my mind today!1 -
Maybe it's time to move my MFP goal from 2 lbs a week to 1 lb a week. I've been SO HUNGRY. I've already blown past my calorie goal for the day and I'll still need dinner tonight.
I think I'm going to wait until the end of this week before doing it; maybe once my stress level goes down I won't feel the need to eat so much.0 -
thewindandthework wrote: »Maybe it's time to move my MFP goal from 2 lbs a week to 1 lb a week. I've been SO HUNGRY. I've already blown past my calorie goal for the day and I'll still need dinner tonight.
I think I'm going to wait until the end of this week before doing it; maybe once my stress level goes down I won't feel the need to eat so much.
Was it on an off workout day? I ask because the day after I do a long cardio session I am pretty hungry lately. Day of the long cardio I seem to be ok even less hungry than on normal cardio days.
Personally I would move my goal to slightly lower if I felt like I was getting close to breaking it regularly. It's better to slow down than to get discouraged and quit or lose my gains.1 -
Rangerharms wrote: »I'm so glad y'all brought up the loose skin issue...I am SO worried about that. I have had three kids all by C-section and my tummy is so saggy already. I'm hoping when I lose the weight, everything will tighten up and go back to the way it was BEFORE I was pregnant. Sometimes I just fear that it won't go back because I waited so dang long to fix it. My oldest is 8 and youngest is 1. I've steady gained throughout all of the pregnancies. Now I have over 115 lbs to lose and feel so bad about letting myself get to this point. Anyway, it's nice to vent here, so thanks for this thread! Y'all are awesome!
Me, too. I'm hoping that by losing it slowly, it will not be too disgusting. But I'm not young anymore so the resilience isn't going to be there, and 100# is a lot of weight. Saggy belly skin can be hidden by clothing, but not a wrinkly face.1 -
We are ready to kick off the start of summer with Memorial Day Weekend (here in the States). Does anyone have any advise for warding off those inevitable splurges at parties/picnics? I am stressing a little about my upcoming Monday weigh-in. Plus I am off on Fri so my holiday starts a day earlier.0
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Rangerharms wrote: »I'm so glad y'all brought up the loose skin issue...I am SO worried about that. I have had three kids all by C-section and my tummy is so saggy already. I'm hoping when I lose the weight, everything will tighten up and go back to the way it was BEFORE I was pregnant. Sometimes I just fear that it won't go back because I waited so dang long to fix it. My oldest is 8 and youngest is 1. I've steady gained throughout all of the pregnancies. Now I have over 115 lbs to lose and feel so bad about letting myself get to this point. Anyway, it's nice to vent here, so thanks for this thread! Y'all are awesome!
Me, too. I'm hoping that by losing it slowly, it will not be too disgusting. But I'm not young anymore so the resilience isn't going to be there, and 100# is a lot of weight. Saggy belly skin can be hidden by clothing, but not a wrinkly face.
I read that if you drink lots and lots of water, it can help with the wrinkles. My problem is getting the water down. Ha0 -
Rangerharms wrote: »[quote=
I read that if you drink lots and lots of water, it can help with the wrinkles. My problem is getting the water down. Ha
That's good to know. I drink 90-120ozwater/day.0 -
We are ready to kick off the start of summer with Memorial Day Weekend (here in the States). Does anyone have any advise for warding off those inevitable splurges at parties/picnics? I am stressing a little about my upcoming Monday weigh-in. Plus I am off on Fri so my holiday starts a day earlier.
I'm going to try and drink a glass or 3 of water before I eat at any event. I also am going to limit myself to 1 plate total, not heaping either. That plate I'll also try really hard to make a good balanced mean with a limited amount of carbs. No 3 spoons of potato salad for me unfortunately.
I am not looking to deny myself a good time just limit it a bit. Knowing full well and planning for it is better than complete denial. This way I don't get frustrated and end up stopping over 1 event that I could possibly keep to just over maintenance for the day.
Oh and remember that you are more than likely going to be eating a ton more sodium than normal.This could add some water weight and not fat. Last week I went over on sodium by eating a a restaurant. I know I came in at my limit that day but I somehow added almost 2 lbs to my weight. Not possible that I overate maintenance by 7000 calories and the water was gone after a few days sensible eating.2 -
We are ready to kick off the start of summer with Memorial Day Weekend (here in the States). Does anyone have any advise for warding off those inevitable splurges at parties/picnics? I am stressing a little about my upcoming Monday weigh-in. Plus I am off on Fri so my holiday starts a day earlier.
For me the biggie is sodium intake.
Be careful of your alcohol intake, too-- not only are there 100-250 calories/beer, it can cause overeating by lowering inhibitions.
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I have lost 48.4 pounds. Really close to 50. If someone else lost that amount, I would tell them to be proud of themselves.
Am I proud of myself?
Pride isn't a feeling I'm particularly accustomed to. It doesn't come easy to me. I know I have worked hard, and that I've kept going even when it's been hard. I'm impressed with myself, and frankly I'm surprised at how well I've done.
But am I proud? I don't know. Maybe. Sometimes, I think.
If I'm only maybe sometimes proud at 50 pounds down, how will I feel when I hit goal weight? Probably sort of proud? Kind of happy for the most part?
I think I'm starting to feel the thing that others have mentioned--I already knew it, but suddenly it's becoming very real that I will still have to deal with most of my hangups and problems even when I'm no longer fat.
The low self-esteem will still be there. Maybe it will improve, but it has left its mark, and I fear that it is indelible.
It's easy to be proud of other people. It's very, very hard to be proud of myself.5 -
I can definitely relate to that. I reached the 60 lb threshold this week. If I step outside myself, its an incredible amount, and I know my doctor is going to be absolutely thrilled. But do I see it as an accomplishment? In all honesty, no. I look in a mirror and I don't really see any difference in the face staring back at me. I've lost 4" off my waist, but I don't really see a difference in my profile. Yeah, my old clothes fit looser, but not so much that I've done any clothes shopping - I can't really afford to right now. Yes, I can get into my sister's size 26W jeans now, but I've been there before. In truth, in the back of my mind, there's that little voice that says "you've only come 1/4 of the way where you need to be. You're going to fail, you know you will - you always do. You failed last time, and the time before that. You know this won't be any different. You're going to plateau before you even reach your 1st major goal, and then it's going to come back on, just like it did before. Even statistics are against you - didn't you just read that only 1 or 2% of people lose the weight and keep it off?"
I think that's most of my problem. I'm naturally self-negative - badly so - and that little sarcastic, overly critical, self-bashing voice in the back of my mind never goes away, and never lets me truly accept a victory or a success. And all I can see if where I've tried before and failed. I kept all my big clothes from before because I knew I was going to be back into, and like a self-fulfilling prophecy, sure enough, I had to dig them back out. I lost 90 lbs before, but instead of being happy with myself, I was upset that I didn't go further, because I needed to go so much further. In all honesty, I needed to loose over 200 lbs, and that would put me in the lower overweight range. In all truth, I doubt I'll ever make it that far, and I know I'll never be in what is considered the healthy BMI range. I try to remind myself that I have a big frame, I'm a big woman, that newer research is showing that the BMI is too generic of a tool to force a whole population into, that I'm healthy and even 10% off is a great success, but it doesn't work.
I can be very considerate of others; I can be encouraging, sympathetic, and understanding. When others don't quite meet their goals, I can be very supportive, congratulating them on what they have achieved, trying to pull their focus to what they have done and how far they have come, and not to the little bit beyond. I can encourage people to be self-forgiving, to be realistic, to realize that just because they don't reach their set goal, that coming close is just as much as victory, that many times we set our expectations to high and set ourselves up for failure. I can do all that for others, but I can't seem to do it for myself.
Perhaps its partly how I was raised. I lose weight, and family says "oh, I didn't notice". Or they won't comment at all. Or I'll mention what I have lost, hating myself as I do it because I know deep down, I'm seeking affirmation, and all I get is "oh, that's nice. did you know how much your brother lost?" I visit my grandmother, and she always makes a comment on weight loss. When I was losing before, every time I came in, she'd ask "are you still losing weight?" It was so humiliating to admit the plateau last time.
I'm not an optimistic person. I say I'm a realist, but I fall over into pessimism all too often, and every week, I expect and dread "the plateau". I hope and even dream about one day being back down under 300 lbs - and even, on rare nights, day dream about being back under 200 lbs - but that hope is a fragile spark that is assaulted constantly by the icy rains of my fears and the sharp blasts of windy self- criticism.
I find myself needing affirmation and encouragement, needing others to remind me that I'm doing well, that I have been successful, that even when I stumble and fall that it's okay, even as I hate myself for needing it - which is such a paradox, because I don't judge others who need that, instead acknowledging that the need for others, the need for help and encouragement, is part of the human experience and nothing to be ashamed of, so why do I have such a high and completely unrealistic standard for myself?
Sorry for highjacking your post Wind - does any of this seem familiar to you? Perhaps its something we can both work on!1