Thank you, @KnitOrMiss. Given the struggles of the last month, that means a great deal to me.

May 30
DBF: 2

KnitOrMiss wrote: »

Hungry_Shopgirl wrote: »

Thank you @Nevadaden. @brittdee88 you're a legend! 185 DBF is amazing.

This has me pretty stressed out today. After my two binge days this week I'm starting today, without having eaten a single bite yet, already over my weekly goal. I feel defeated. Even if I have a perfect day everything I eat will count against me. And the net of this week will be a gain.



Anyways, thank you guys for your support. I know I sound like a negative Nancy right now but being able to talk about it on here makes me feel like I'm not alone in it.

@Hungry_Shopgirl

A few things that really help me are to remember:

• that unless I ate 3500 calories OVER my maintenance calories, I didn't gain anything. Anything showing on the scale is water retention and such. So you have maybe one single day (in the past week) that qualifies for this. And that's a maybe. That means all you really did was SLOW any weight loss or hover near maintenance. In the grand scheme of life, how bad is that, really?
• Friends are CRITICAL for a reality check when I get caught up in the details.
• (for me) punishment should never be the response to a binge. Was it the best fuel? No. Did my body still use it? Yes.
• GUILT is worse than any carb or calorie ever. It fuels the binge/restrict cycle. Learning to let yesterday go, no matter what it was, helps...
• nutrition trumps any calorie or carb or fat gram. EVERY TIME. Even if I had a binge of 10,000 - 20,000 calories (probably happened at my worst, but wasn't tracking back then), the next meal I do eat must be nutritious. My next day must be nutritious and on as on plan as possible. When we try to eat less to balance the previous day's binge, we neglect nutrients our body desperately needs - which fuels hunger. And if we excessively restrict, then we're just setting ourselves up for another binge.
• I can't undo what I've done, but my next bite/meal can be a healthier choice.
• in a year, will you remember this binge? Will it be an event that is still a crisis? What about 5 years? In 10 years, will that day's binge calories still matter??
• it is completely impossible to avoid all the binge triggers - and it is impossible to avoid every binge. If I keep that in mind, and I do the best I can when I can, I'm still better off. Since I can't avoid triggers (stress, tired, boredom, etc.) and I can't avoid food completely, I know that off plan eating will happen. Accepting that and minimizing the damage, rather than trying to stop what feels like an immovable force seems like a far more productive line of thinking for me, personally.
• Protein is satiating. Fat is necessary for human bodily function. Carbs fuel brain function (though the body can convert for carbs). Food is necessary for life. So eating foods, even "bad" foods, still provides my body some fuel. Fuel should carry zero guilt. Do I always get the most expensive gasoline for my car? No. Does it still run? Yes. Do I do the best I can do with what I have? Yes.

I hope a few of my personal struggles and "things to remember" help you a bit.

I’m new to this group but after scrolling through this, I think I need to join in. After a year on MFP I’ve lost all but the last 5-7 lbs of my goal; my weight is more stable; I binge much less; I’m less obsessive about food and my mindset is SO much better.

But some days I feel like I’m banging my head against the wall, just managing calories around binges. So frustrating.

I’ve got the shame thing going; I rarely talk about my binge eating openly.

So I finally jumped in on this group and scrolled through this thread. And this ^ really helped me to read - thank you @KnitOrMiss. And it seems like you all understand this stuff. So this is my little hello and introduction and I want to post a some wind here for the rest of May.

@wellnesschaser

I'm working through the mental side of it all, to be sure. I don't have anything "down pat," but I keep reminding myself of these things all the time.

And I'm VERY vocal about this stuff. I put myself on a form of "blast" all the time. But I still hide things. It's so awful... There is a test on here regarding binge eating scores... You might look for it, or one of us might bump it... It's definitely interesting.

Welcome and good luck!

Sigh...

Me: Very few
B: Too many to count

Turning the page to June...

@Llamapants86

Congrats on winding down May a winner!

Thanks for the welcomes @britdee88 @Llamapants86 & @KnitOrMiss

May 31
Me 1