Don't Let the Bathroom Scale Get the Better of You
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Empty nesting....that's got to be hard! I think I'd have a Sangria or two as well, and I don't drink! My oldest is about to head to Amsterdam and then the UK. It's going to be tough to say goodbye.
About the food scales...it's was only this week I was guessing with my portions. I do weigh religiously at home, so I think I'm probably pretty good at determining quantities. Had a few meals that I wouldn't usually choose for myself, that were calorie heavy, but I'm sure I ate below maintenance every day. I'm actually feeling ok with not being 100% accurate for the first time ever. This week has been good for me to break out of my rigid freakout mode. It's liberating to know I'm ok being "close enough" for a short time. I'll probably go back to my pedantic best once I'm home tomorrow but I've enjoyed the mini-break this week. Thanks to all you lot and your wisdom.2 -
real_change wrote: »I should have posted my uptick after a challenging few weeks (empty nest, first travel since surgery and hosting a huge party) here. I posted under "falling off the wagon" which I didn't really like. I never felt like I was going to permanently give up, even if I wasn't always happy with my decisions. I had one day, in particular, that looked a little too much like the past (eating a bunch of junk food in my car).
I pretty much gave up alcohol before my surgery but I drank a lot this last week. 😂 My husband and I were pretty excited to celebrate (moderately) successfully raising 4 sons. And I make a mean sangria which we had in abundance at our party.
So overall, no (or few) regrets. Mostly because you all are teaching me how to live a happy life and lose weight!
I am happy you are mostly happy. I am less happy that you had sangria without inviting me. I know... I can't have any because I am pre-op right now...
The one thing I had to come to grips with is that my life cannot be paused now or after the weight loss phase is over. If I wanted to live my life heavily restricted for forever I could have gone and had weight loss surgery. I chose a messier path for myself. I believe will mean that for forever I will have periods of being back in a deficit to offset all the great food I still want to eat during special occasions.
Having recently had a 6lb gain after a night out I too have embraced the fact that I need to keep an eye on things once I get to the maintenance weight I am happy with. There will always be celebrations, and other instances where I will actively join in but managing that to ensure I don't slip back to old habits and start regaining is something that I am gradually learning.3 -
maiomaio71 wrote: »Empty nesting....that's got to be hard! I think I'd have a Sangria or two as well, and I don't drink! My oldest is about to head to Amsterdam and then the UK. It's going to be tough to say goodbye.
About the food scales...it's was only this week I was guessing with my portions. I do weigh religiously at home, so I think I'm probably pretty good at determining quantities. Had a few meals that I wouldn't usually choose for myself, that were calorie heavy, but I'm sure I ate below maintenance every day. I'm actually feeling ok with not being 100% accurate for the first time ever. This week has been good for me to break out of my rigid freakout mode. It's liberating to know I'm ok being "close enough" for a short time. I'll probably go back to my pedantic best once I'm home tomorrow but I've enjoyed the mini-break this week. Thanks to all you lot and your wisdom.
@maiomaio71 You are really doing great! You have taken giant leaps forward this last week with the scale uptick and being okay with guesses on calories. You should be so proud.
I like that you have confidence that because you weigh at home you have learned to better estimate with your eyes. I think that is a very important skill to hone. I don't think we ever want to be too reliant on the food scale or even logging to feed ourselves and stay within an appropriate calorie range. I would not ever want to go a very long time without the scale or logging but I feel like I could easily go a month if needed. I am not sure how long it would take for my calories/portions to start creeping up but I would rather not try and find out anytime soon.
Good job!!1 -
Jackie9003 wrote: »real_change wrote: »I should have posted my uptick after a challenging few weeks (empty nest, first travel since surgery and hosting a huge party) here. I posted under "falling off the wagon" which I didn't really like. I never felt like I was going to permanently give up, even if I wasn't always happy with my decisions. I had one day, in particular, that looked a little too much like the past (eating a bunch of junk food in my car).
I pretty much gave up alcohol before my surgery but I drank a lot this last week. 😂 My husband and I were pretty excited to celebrate (moderately) successfully raising 4 sons. And I make a mean sangria which we had in abundance at our party.
So overall, no (or few) regrets. Mostly because you all are teaching me how to live a happy life and lose weight!
I am happy you are mostly happy. I am less happy that you had sangria without inviting me. I know... I can't have any because I am pre-op right now...
The one thing I had to come to grips with is that my life cannot be paused now or after the weight loss phase is over. If I wanted to live my life heavily restricted for forever I could have gone and had weight loss surgery. I chose a messier path for myself. I believe will mean that for forever I will have periods of being back in a deficit to offset all the great food I still want to eat during special occasions.
Having recently had a 6lb gain after a night out I too have embraced the fact that I need to keep an eye on things once I get to the maintenance weight I am happy with. There will always be celebrations, and other instances where I will actively join in but managing that to ensure I don't slip back to old habits and start regaining is something that I am gradually learning.
I think as long as we keep learning gradually that is what will make the difference. Weight is gained and lost gradually in most normal situations so as long as we stay alert we can keep correcting course. I am doing this to have a bigger life so I do not want fear to hold me back. I think "healthy concern" would be a good level at which to stay.1 -
So, I almost posted this in the "Share your Numbers" thread, because it is related to my post in there. I wanted to share some of my graphs because I think it's important to make sure to take a step back and look at things from a bird's eye view.
In the day-to-day, it is easy to lose sight of the forest for the trees. Especially as you trend downward through the weight loss and the forgiveness margins are narrower to loose logging or to holidays, etc.
April -> July, I had some holidays, trips, birthdays, anniversaries, etc.
If I just looked at the daily or even the monthly, it could be discouraging. Case in point:
April:
May:
2019, en totale:
Now, there are some bumps in my 2019 line becuase I'm almost at the end. In 2018, my line is near perfect because I had more weight to lose, therefore my margin of "error" was bigger and it was easier to absorb these changes without seeing too much overall trend affect.
But those bumps are around ~5lbs; nothing as significant as it looks. It looks bad because the numbers of loss I'm working with have gotten teeny. Especially, since those months I was working more towards a half-pound/quarter-pound a week average loss.
I guess what I'm trying to say is ... don't give up because of fluctuations. Don't give up because a month is rough. Zoom out and look at your historical data if you have it, or look out at your progress in total to see that one week, one trend, one month will not undo everything.
Those graphs where my weight fluctuated? My measurements stayed stable! That's what I honestly use my measurements for. So that if the scale goes wild, but the measurements are the same(ish), then I know that whatever is going on on the scale isn't permanent and it's also just likely water.
Anyway, this got long, but I hope it helps someone get through the darn scale parties!5 -
So here is my update on my uptick:
Over 4 days (Sat - Tues) I gained 6.2 pounds.
In the last 2 days I have lost 4.4 pound (3.4 over it between yesterday and today).
As you can see water comes and then it goes. It takes electrolytes with it but I am compensating for that.
It is unlikely I will get to a new low weight this week but that is normal for me. I might hit a new low next week and when it does happen it will catch me up completely. All of my weight loss will be accounted for within a small margin of error.3 -
I try not to let the scale get the better of me, because unfortunately I am one of those women who gains water weight during both major parts of her cycle...so there are *two* weeks every month where I've gained roughly 3 (average) pounds of water weight!
It's frustrating as hell, but since I've started keeping track of that stuff, I know when to expect it, and it greatly helps. I urge any woman to keep track of weight versus cycle phases!1 -
Wow! Fluctuations are crazy crazy things. Gotta love your data. So pleased you posted that @dhiammarath. This helps so much.0
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@maiomaio71 I'm glad it helped you!! You are most welcome!0
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I'm wondering if I should get a new scale or just keep on with the one I'm using since it seems accurate overall. I've been in this pattern where I weigh the exact same for a 5-7 days, then see a new low for a day (sometimes 2) then go back up (sometimes all the way, sometimes only part of the way) & stay there for another 5-7 days. I'm not seeing any variances daily, so it just looks weird to me. This pattern has been going on pretty much since the beginning, but here's the last 19 days for example: 279 for 4 days, 277.5 for 1 day, 279 for 4 days, 277.5 for 5 days, 274.5 for 1 day, then 276.5 for the last 4 days. I've had several stretches of no change that were 8-10 days.
Now, the reason I say I think my scale is overall pretty accurate is that I went to the Dr. during the 277.5 day stretch & their scale showed 277.2 (granted I did have clothes on at the Dr. office & I don't at home). I had a different Dr. appt early in my journey & I remember their scale being about the same as mine as well.
I'm wondering if the reason I'm not showing any change on a daily basis is just because my scale apparently only measures in .5 lb increments. It's an older scale & I do the "reset" every time I get on it, I was just expecting my graph to look a lot more varied than it does.0 -
@jlucas210 I'd get a new scale that offers a bit more detailed measurement. I'm really happy with my Withings Body Smart scale, got it back in April.1
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I have the biggest loser digital scale, it seems pretty consistent1
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I'm wondering if I should get a new scale or just keep on with the one I'm using since it seems accurate overall. I've been in this pattern where I weigh the exact same for a 5-7 days, then see a new low for a day (sometimes 2) then go back up (sometimes all the way, sometimes only part of the way) & stay there for another 5-7 days. I'm not seeing any variances daily, so it just looks weird to me. This pattern has been going on pretty much since the beginning, but here's the last 19 days for example: 279 for 4 days, 277.5 for 1 day, 279 for 4 days, 277.5 for 5 days, 274.5 for 1 day, then 276.5 for the last 4 days. I've had several stretches of no change that were 8-10 days.
Now, the reason I say I think my scale is overall pretty accurate is that I went to the Dr. during the 277.5 day stretch & their scale showed 277.2 (granted I did have clothes on at the Dr. office & I don't at home). I had a different Dr. appt early in my journey & I remember their scale being about the same as mine as well.
I'm wondering if the reason I'm not showing any change on a daily basis is just because my scale apparently only measures in .5 lb increments. It's an older scale & I do the "reset" every time I get on it, I was just expecting my graph to look a lot more varied than it does.
It is hard to say. If you have become accustomed to the way your current scale works you may not like one that shows smaller increments. You will definitely see more "action" but it is not really meaningful. I don't really consider my weight to have changed if it is within a .4 range of the previous day's weight.
The other possible downside is that your new scale may naturally weigh you higher and that can be a bit of a bummer to get accustomed to. Of course there is a chance you might get lucky and you may find yourself lower on the new scale.
I think if you get a new one just get one you can return. I am not going to give direct advice because I believe the whole act of weighing is a pretty personal experience and for some people that includes the scale.2 -
I am a big believer that a measuring tape is a better judge of progress than a scale. With water weight and just daily fluctuations the scale has a tendency to irritate me more than it helps me. The tape measure never lies in my experience.3
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In general, I agree with the measuring tape, but I'm so evenly distributed & it appears my fat comes off that way as well, so it takes a long time to see changes in the measuring tape. I haven't decided what I'll do about the scale yet. For now, I'm just going to keep on keeping on!2
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@jlucas210 please keep us updated on not only your progress but how you are managing. My weight, also, is fluctuating much as you describe and I am "keep on keeping on" - for weeks now. It sounds reasonable to me to heed @jjlewey idea of using a measuring tape, something I have yet to incorporate and this is the opportunity!
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@hansep0012 thanks! I have been using a measuring tape from the beginning, it's just hard to tell a whole lot since I lose so evenly. I know in the end that's a good thing, it just makes it harder to see the results along the way. One more exercise in patience!
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I use the measuring tape to know when I've lost inches, but also to remind me that I've not gained inches when the scale fluctuates.
(Ie, this weekend, I had a calorie dense weekend and so I'm up 3lbs, but I did a quick check of my measurements and they're all the same. It helps me keep my sanity. XD)3 -
I finally got around to ordering a decent measuring tape. I've put off taking measurements for too long.4
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A great non-scale victory for me today. I took my first bubble bath in two months (healing tattoo) and discovered that my belly is now below the edge of the tub! I almost started crying as I can’t remember the last time my belly didn’t stick up above the bathtub! 12
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Well the scale is certainly getting the better of me at the moment. 3 weeks at the same weight. Even if I was only weighing monthly like I used to, I can feel that I haven't lost anything. It's soul destroying.0
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maiomaio71 wrote: »Well the scale is certainly getting the better of me at the moment. 3 weeks at the same weight. Even if I was only weighing monthly like I used to, I can feel that I haven't lost anything. It's soul destroying.
Weight loss doesn't stop on a dime unless there is a radical shift in habit(s). Assuming your habits are relatively stable I would imagine you just need to give it a little more time.
Have you calculated your average deficit recently when you hit a new low weight? If not, do you need any help with it? I am always happy to lend a hand.1 -
I just go with what MND tells me my deficit should be. I did get a bit lax for a week or so with weighing food but I would still have been eating at a deficit. This last week I've been back to my previous pedantic best! (Sorry, I use MyNetDiary not mfp for logging and it automatically changes your deficit when you put in a new weight).0
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maiomaio71 wrote: »I just go with what MND tells me my deficit should be. I did get a bit lax for a week or so with weighing food but I would still have been eating at a deficit. This last week I've been back to my previous pedantic best! (Sorry, I use MyNetDiary not mfp for logging and it automatically changes your deficit when you put in a new weight).
You don' have to apologize for using another service to me. I don't care. MFP is just a tool. I use MFP for logging but I use my own numbers for calories and tracking.
If you were in a calorie deficit you are losing fat weight. I have gone almost 2 months before on faith alone that my weight loss would catch up. It always does if I am in a deficit. It is not uncommon for me to go 3 weeks between new low weight.
Assuming everything is fine and a new low weight is around the corner this may be good experience for you. It is hard but the more often you go through it the less I hope it impacts you. The bathroom scale is a horrible motivational tool.
I can still help you determine your average calorie deficit if you would like. I know you get one from MND but it doesn't hurt to check and make sure your actual results match.1 -
@NovusDies speaks the truth, it is amazing to see how your "true weight" shown on scale will catch up to what your "calculated weight" based on the deficit is. I made a spread sheet that tracks my true vs calculated weight and 90% of the time my calculated is lower. Then some miracle will happen and my true weight will bottom out to slightly lower than my calculated weight. If you are being honest with your calorie calculations the scale will catch up. I am not a scientist, so I cant explain why, but I have seen it happen everytime on my spreadsheet. The math works, the emotions are a whole another ballgame, hang in there.2
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@NovusDies Ok thank you. I'll message you? I think I can work out how to do that through this!0
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Thanks for the positive feedback. I just need to hang in there and keep going. I have slacked off a bit on the exercise so I can get that going again now the weather is better too. I experimented with distributing my calories more evenly during the day as I tend to eat about 50% in the evening but that hasn't helped...and it's made it a battle to not graze in the evenings--so I'll go back to what was working. I would probably have given up if I didn't have this group so thanks for keeping me sane!1
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maiomaio71 wrote: »@NovusDies Ok thank you. I'll message you? I think I can work out how to do that through this!
MFP doesn't allow for messaging between people who are not friends. It is a weird system.0 -
Oh. I thought I'd messaged you. So do I need to add you as a friend? Not sure how to do that! What info do you need from me?0
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maiomaio71 wrote: »Oh. I thought I'd messaged you. So do I need to add you as a friend? Not sure how to do that! What info do you need from me?
I just need a recent date and a weight while you were losing and a date and a weight about 4-6 weeks before it.
To add friends you click on the user name, it takes you to another screen, then click on the user name again, on the next screen there should be a button to add as a friend.
ETA: It allows you to think you have sent a message to another person but it never goes through. It is a stupid system. I sent one to @Jackie9003 awhile back because I can never remember who my friends are. If I go into the Sent folder I can see that she has never read it. I do not actively "Friend" people on MFP because I am a terrible at keeping up with the newsfeed.
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