kellie_erin wrote: »

CW: 189.8

I really didn't want to post this. I know some of it's from birthday dinner and subsequent nights of cake (my husband made me carrot cake!) and some of it's from my stupid cycle.

But this past week has been pretty *kitten* despite the birthday and getting back to the gym. I've been once again ghosted by my master's supervisor. My company made a job for another engineer-in-training even though they told me they couldn't do that for me. It's hard not take that personally. And I've been experiencing a lot of pain. So my mental health baseline is just shot. But it's been shot for such a long time that I'm starting to wonder if that's just the new normal for me.

Here's hoping next week is better. I appreciate reading about everyone's successes and struggles. All your perseverance is inspiring!

I'm glad you posted, even if the birthday and other factors made it a number you aren't too fond of. At least you know exactly why it is that way, and it far from the worst splurge week gain I have ever seen!

I'm very sorry, though, to hear about your supervisor. I think it is time to go talk with the dean's office. There should be an associate dean (or vice-dean) who is responsible for graduate studies. This is terrible behaviour on the part of your supervisor, and I think you need to go ask for help. Take it personally, for sure - and make sure that your voice is heard. This is exactly what an associate dean is there for. As to work, that is another issue that needs to be brought to light. Get an advocate to go with you for both conversations if that helps. Plan your points in advance, and be strong - you certainly deserve better treatment or a clear explanation of why you are being treated this way. If it is unsatisfactory, I hope you are looking for another job. It is so hard, but having been an associate dean grad studies, I know that it is the way to go. For work, there must also be someone you can talk to who is above the people undercutting you. Those kinds of meetings can feel daunting, but it is always easier than it seems once you get into it. You're there to get help, and helping you is a big part of their jobs. Message me if you want some prep support

PS. Husband-made carrot cake is manna from heaven! Mine makes the best - but maybe they could have a recipe challenge!