Daily check in
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Have the day off one of the perks of working for a school system. I work for a contract kitchen as the executive chef manger in a school system. I get to be a chef with the hours of a teacher. So I had the kids home with me. Today was a good day was able to resist the urge to eat bad and not binge as of right now. When I am hole all day with nothing planned is when I feel the urge to binge very strongly.0
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irishjeepgirl1969 wrote: »I wonder if it's got something to do with the texture of it? I can't have peanut butter in the house. One of my favorite binge foods is peanut butter and chocolate frosting sandwiches. The feeling of it in my mouth seems to satisfy some.....need? Desire? I don't know. But peanut butter, once consumed, makes me feel sick.
Not that it stops me.
You nailed it! It's 100% about texture. Peanuts are fine and I'll eat them but it has nothing to do with flavor. I confirmed that this weekend when I got powdered peanut butter and ate a bunch of it and was not remotely satisfied until I got to the real thing. Totally a texture thing.
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I'm glad people are having good days today, it's always a great feeling to start the week off on the right foot!0
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Ugh I found the powered PB to be gross
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I hope you all are doing well! Today is a new day!0
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I am going to jump in here......I did not read the rest and dont have time now but I like the idea of a check in. Last night was an emotional rollercoaster but I didnt binge. Actually I dont think I have had a full on binge in two months! Today has been great except for my seniors getting on my nerves as we are starting the written portion of their research papers. Hope you all are well!!!0
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I agree about the powdered PB. It is gross. It tastes nothing like the real thing. I did okay so far today and hope that the rest of the night goes well.0
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I had a good day. Got up early and used the elliptical then went to the playground and ran around with my daughter for a couple hours. I think it will be s early bedtime for everyone tonight.0
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My day was pretty decent but nothing for the record books. I spent way too much time with people, which makes me nutty. I countered that with an hour at the gym with earbuds crammed in my ears, then an hour walking in the warm sun with my earbuds crammed in. I'll be deaf by the time I'm thin
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First "clean" week in months as of this AM. Pretty happy about that. Hoping to keep up some momentum.0
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I am going to jump in here......I did not read the rest and dont have time now but I like the idea of a check in. Last night was an emotional rollercoaster but I didnt binge. Actually I dont think I have had a full on binge in two months! Today has been great except for my seniors getting on my nerves as we are starting the written portion of their research papers. Hope you all are well!!!
I am sorry late teenage people from what I remember can be a challenge. especially getting close to graduation and the end of the year. I am glad to hear you have not had a binge in almost two months, that is great. Best of luck to you.0 -
Today was an alright day. Talked myself out of a potential binge so that is progress.0
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That sounds like a GREAT accomplishment to me! Talking yourself down from a binge takes a lot, the urges can be so overwhelming.0
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The more you talk yourself down from that ledge, the easier it becomes! I'll get there one day, too
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Awful day. One of my worst. 3 good days in a row then BAM! Seriously thinking of going to counseling and paying out of pocket until our insurance kicks in on the 1st. Just can't keep doing this.0
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Same for me! I haven't made it more than 3 days since January so I'm not surprised.0
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Yeah I won't be sleeping well tonight. My stomach is so tight and painful0
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Yesterday after my binge I had a major emotional breakdown. My husband knows that I have some struggles with food but I've been pretty secretive about my binges. Last night I broke down and confessed everything to him. It felt good to be honest about it and get it all out. He was very understanding and supportive. We talked about some of my triggers and it really helped.0
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Yesterday after my binge I had a major emotional breakdown. My husband knows that I have some struggles with food but I've been pretty secretive about my binges. Last night I broke down and confessed everything to him. It felt good to be honest about it and get it all out. He was very understanding and supportive. We talked about some of my triggers and it really helped.
That's a good thing I think (telling your husband). I let my wife in on some of my struggles recently as well and I think it really helped. The secrecy of it was getting to me so just telling her that I was struggling and that she wasn't seeing it because I was hiding it was important. A bit of a weight lifted off of my shoulders.
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I know the feeling of finally being able to open up and talk freely to your spouse about this. It took talking to my psychiatrist, then when I got home I was telling my wife about what the diagnosis was, and that led to a long conversation about the binge eating and coming clean about how much, and what I was eating, and how I was hiding it from her and everyone. That also led me to start this group, and start writing the blogs, so hopefully by sharing my story people will feel more comfortable at least starting to open up to those closest to them0
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That's awesome that you both opened up and that it's been helpful. For some reason, I feel being open about it with my husband has had the opposite effect. Now I don't feel like I need to be as secretive about it, and I binge in his presense. It used to be that binging was in some ways a crime of opportunity. Now, I no longer feel limited to the times in which he isn't home or is sleeping. I do feel ashamed, but not enough to be able to stop me. And when he tried to help me or stop me, I just become angry. It sucks.0
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That's awesome that you both opened up and that it's been helpful. For some reason, I feel being open about it with my husband has had the opposite effect. Now I don't feel like I need to be as secretive about it, and I binge in his presense. It used to be that binging was in some ways a crime of opportunity. Now, I no longer feel limited to the times in which he isn't home or is sleeping. I do feel ashamed, but not enough to be able to stop me. And when he tried to help me or stop me, I just become angry. It sucks.
That's me, too.
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Today is apparently a sugar day today! I had 2 pieces of cake at work, 2 small boxes of nerds, and 4 Andes mints! I haven't "binged" on a month and I am on my way today. I figured I'd post on here to help me avoid any more snacking!0
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Now I don't feel like I need to be as secretive about it, and I binge in his presence.
It's not really discussed around my house. I sometimes say no, when offered a cookie, and add, " I have a problem with those....' and of course, if I later dip into the cookies... I binge on them, pretty much right in front of my wife and son. But, often, I'll sneak up to the kitchen while they're watching TV, and go through the cupboards, and just eat there, in private.
I feel like currently... I'm more prone to 'mini-binges....' I consider them to be sort of semi-controlled, somewhat lower volume / calorie binges. But, still, binges all the same. Say in the under 1,000 calorie range. But, I think the guilt is somewhat less, if I stay below full-on hardcore binge range. Although, the rational side of my head says, that 1.000 calories over maintenance daily, would be a 2 lb gain per week. :huh:
Here's a question. I recently realized that I start pretty much every day thinking that I just won't binge that day. Today, I'm gonna be fine... no worries... this doesn't feel like a binge day. Maybe tomorrow, but not today. Today, I'm fine. Then, after dinner, when I'm face-down in a bag of Oreos.... I just think what a stupid *kitten* I am.... why did I ever feel so optimistic in the morning? Do others feel that way, too? That today is going to be different? Like with no concrete reason for it... nothing has changed since yesterday, but still wake up with that optimism that today, I won't binge? As if it's a given, it's just not going to happen today.
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Yes I used to feel that way, I would tell myself today is the day I eat healthy and goto the gym, then after the gym I buy doughnuts and take in more calories than I burned off. Then raid the pantry once everyone was asleep and eat whatever I could find. I would then hide the evidence so that when everyone woke up in the morning there was no trace of what I had done the night before.0
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2toes,I do that. And I feel like a maroon about it, too. My day begins like yours. Then I get to the preschool and the kids are in super berserker mode. Or I get home and spot last night's dinner dishes still unwashed and I'm confronted with the copious amount of seventh graders homework x twelve year old girl obstnence + angst. And I binge. And I tell myself that I am stupid, worthless, etc because millions of people cope with all this, so why can't I?
We are not maroons. We are humans. I eat because drinking makes me completely useless. Otherwise, I'd be hanging out at a binge drinking disorder community! I love rum
Sometimes, I think binges are just habit. I'm watching a movie so I must eat popcorn. And there is something comforting about sitting in my big chair swallowed up in a big soft blanket, maybe snuggled up with my kid, and mindlessly cramming gobs of popcorn into my piehole. It's like I can't relax and enjoy all of the other elements of the experience unless the popcorn is present. WTH?
You are not a maroon. You're just a human coping in the only way he knows how. An old sloth canlearn new tricks, though!
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I can totally relate to this. And I feel like every week I start out feeling especially strong. I usually have a good day, get really pumped about it, then everything goes downhill and I start to see "next week" as a new start. Or "tomorrow." It sucks. And I also agree that binge eating definitely can be very habitual. At least for me.0
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I've had 2 really good days in a row. A little nervous about this evening because I'm going to a friend's house for her birthday and she always makes tons of good food.0
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I've had 2 really good days in a row. A little nervous about this evening because I'm going to a friend's house for her birthday and she always makes tons of good food.
Congrats on the two good days! Are you concerned that you might binge at your friend's house, or that it may cause you to binge afterward? You got this!0
