Self Sabotage
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thank you @moonlights. Inspiring for sure!0
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I totally understand how you are feeling, have had an awful few months where I have fallen off track big time have struggled to get back on track again but think I am finally getting there, definitely see this woe as a journey where I will have detours occasionally- I know I am able to do it properly and feel great doing it, but I think my brain doesn't see me as worthy - I definitely think it is all about creating a positive mindset for yourself. I totally agree that it is about learning to love yourself1
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@kathrout1973 Thank you!
Ok, so in the vein of taking your wonderful advice everyone - Today I am going to do something for me. Just for me. I'm going to get a haircut and a professional color. I always do my own color and as you can see from my photo my red is being overgrown by my natural (now gray) brown hair. It's time to let the natural colors speak for themselves and dump the reds but I want to do it right and let the colors blend nicely so as my hair grows I don't have these awful "lines"11 -
http://alldayidreamaboutfood.com/2015/05/top-10-tips-for-getting-back-on-track-with-your-low-carb-diet.html
Got lost for an hour in the above link!! Thanks...great info!2 -
I'm back here on the forum after a week of a not-good experiment. I was looking through a cookbook "Hungry Girl's Clean and Hungry" cookbook, and all of a sudden, I decided that if I controlled my calories, I could eat anything, justifying it to myself that if I lost scale weight, it would be fine no matter how I did it with diet.
Now this cookbook is very much a Weight Watchers type cookbook, low fat, high fiber, etc. I did fine for the first few days, but then POW my sugar monster reared its head and I was off to the races. Yesterday, I remembered that I opened the LCHF door because I wanted to reverse my insulin resistance and prediabetes, and that means controlling carbs and not overeating, PERIOD. So I'm back. I feel a little foolish, but I learned from this foray that too many carbs make me hungrier, AND my blood sugars are not as good as they were on LCHF! Sheesh!
I think just as we all have a trigger that starts us down the slippery slope, we also have a trigger that starts us down the healthier groove. My unproductive major trigger is sweets, low carb, low fat, artificially sweetened or otherwise. The most powerful good habit is activity, because I can see the impact on my blood sugar immediately, and it's very reinforcing.
It's much easier to focus on what we can DO rather than what we should NOT DO. (Don't think about a blue elephant! Don't! Don't!) I really am aging very quickly, and I want to enjoy this autumn of my life as best I can.
I'm sorry I just wrote all about myself here, hopefully something in my meandering might be helpful. I am not new to the diet game at all, so I am very familiar with the imp on my shoulder whispering seductions into my ear. All I can offer is to be company on the journey....:)
Rosey8 -
You're really Rosey!
You're Rosey Real!
You're a great big deal!
That's referencing Rose Madder-Stephen King
Just for the record, I may have butchered it some.
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I'm in!! this game is so much mental!!! I ate something can't remember what a couple weeks ago cause no one was home to see me!! I haven't done that since starting and I told myself how silly it was because this battle is between me myself and I and I saw it lol!!4
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Good for you Nosey - we all want to do that wade thru the old SAD diet & find something good about it (me it is TONS of fruit) but it is like wading thru horse *kitten* and saying "There is a pony in here somewhere!!" But alas there isn't - he has left the barn.2
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"Nosey" SIGH gee I meant ROSEY - I should be banned from typing until after morning coffee2
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I can relate to this. Haven't been on target consistantly for awhile now...although my daily efforts have slowed down the regain damage of out of control relapses.
Still I long for that "all systems go, no excuses" mindset that was in charge last year...vacation, bad moods, sadness, work parties...no matter what...I was able to say no to carbs. Now, not so much.
Still in the game, though...and some good days do occur. Now I just have to keep at it til it clicks.
This journey is about so much more than the poundage. I'm trying to change a lifetime of self effacing thoughts and actions, trying to love a body that has been my mortal enemy for 50 years, trying to be my authentic self- when I wouldn't recognise her if she was standing in front of me- and all that stuff gets in my way sometimes. BUT; for now, I am facing these issues head on, as much as I know how.
For so many years food seemed to be my only true friend....I'm trying relentlessly, but haven't quite been able to cut the cord on that. I have to believe that I can, and seeing so much progress mixed in with the relapses gives me hope that I can keep shifting the balance til I get where I want to be.
Really, truly...one day at a time for me.5 -
My best advice would be, if you are craving carbs, to go for something that will feed your body...like an apple. Avoid the empty calories and carbs. Have tomatoes, or even a banana if you're nuts for something sweet. Sugars, grains...poison. My experience has been that the occasional fruit won't knock you out of fat=burning. I think sometimes your body needs one. This probably isn't super-helpful, just my experience is that making a strawberry/banana smoothie with half and half and drinking it while munching on a few nuts can stop that sweet craving cold and makes me feel better. But cookies, etc? Makes me feel bad.1
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@authorwriter, that was my day today... I have been feeling sluggish for the past several days and today was SUPERhungry and not for yukky old cheese, or fat of any sort (although I tried that too). I ended up finally getting to the bottom of my second big apple box full of organic apples - cooking them up as unsweetened applesauce - & thought, YEP that would be wonderful. Had me a cupful and then carried on to TWO Kind bars which threw me over in protein and doubled my carbs to 45 or so. But at the risk of TMI - I finally went to the bathroom properly. I didn't know I had so much waiting in me, since I had been going a bit every day. Probably will have dropped a couple pounds by tomorrow morning, lol. At least I hope!3
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I too have fallen off the bandwagon and wanted to get back on track and I wanted to try counting points/calories again like I have done in the past. But I too find that I thought I could justify my food choices as long as it fit into my calorie/point allotment. But I found out I felt worse and bloated and my ankles and feet swelled like balloons. It definitely triggers me to eat more and not being able to stop. Eating on this WOE I feel better and healthier. So I will stick to it...2
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@elize7 "All systems go, no excuses" That's exactly what I want back....You said it Sister!
@authrowriter problem is I'm not craving them. I'm just eating them because they are there. Literally they don't even taste good. How much do I suck, right? Plus I've let other stuff go too, like the logging and moving.
@kennygang I want to be you when I grow up "So I will stick to it..."
So, it dawned on me today actually that my cycle has been in full force nearly a month now. That's a new twist for me. I've been Keto (cept for the last month) since April. Could Shark Month be to blame? Probably not, but I'd like to think so... I could be hitting menopause too. I'm 42 so that could be sneaking its way in. I don't know. I've been better - WAY better since I started this thread and you guys have been so crazy helpful. But I know I'm not back 100% yet. "All systems go, no excuses". That's what I want again.
I've also been longing for someone near by to do this with. Of course Anna is still trying but she's 100 carbs and I'm 20. She is super busy with school and band stuff so she won't/can't keep me accountable for eating or walking and I can't expect her to. My job as Mom is to help her succeed. I want someone to get me out of bed at 0600 to work out and to keep me motivated. I want a local keto friend. My nearest is about 70 miles away...and I love her dearly but well 70 miles. Wow...could I be more full blown into my own self pity? Crimeny!3 -
RowdysLady wrote: »I think your issue is mental. May I ask you about your frame of mind? Do you believe you deserve the weight loss and your new and incredible looking body? Are you sure you are not self sabotaging because deep down you believe you are not worthy of it?
I ask this as I have been there and done it myself. Self sabotage because my inner voice told me I would not succeed, why bother and you'll always be fat, so who are you kidding?
I had to learn to shut that *kitten* up before I could loose the weight. Before that I was a complete jo jo. Up and down, then further up... vicious circle.
I immediately started to cry when I read this...and now I can't stop. Gee thanks @Bonny132...sheesh
. Methinks you hit the nail on the head since it caused such a strong reaction in me. It doesn't seem like it should be it as I'm in the best, healthiest place I've been in years. I'm happier than I can ever remember being. I've got a great sig other in Rowdy - better than any relationship I've ever been in. Work and kids are pretty darn good overall. There just aren't a million things going wrong in my life these days the way they were a year ago and I should be all set to do this new thing right too. In all these adult years this past has been the very best of my life ever.
It was hard for me to stop myself self sabotaging. It actually took my new partner to turn around and tell me he did not care about my size BUT that I needed to start loving myself.
The loving part is hard, I still struggle with it. I have a wonderful partner who loves me for who I am, but my struggle is to learn to love myself. I am so used to looking into the mirror and hate what I see, so it is easy to give in and over eat. But I am slowly learning that I need to stay strong and to learn to love myself, love my body, appreciate compliments and more importantly to take a step back and to realise, I want to look good and comfortable in my body. I will never be a skinny minny but I will feel sexy, I will feel confident and I will be looking great.
It took me years to realise this, I wish I had years ago, but then I might not have met my partner so who am I to argue?
This is so me too. The part about my husband too. I cannot take a compliment. I don't see what he sees and he just doesn't know why. I love this post and that I am not the only one.1 -
Referencing my 1st post about being all out of bubblegum. Regarding your last post or 2 with your comments in plain text and mine in italic:
I'm just eating them because they are there. You've analyzed now stop it.
"All systems go, no excuses". That's what I want again. If you want it, do it.
" Could Shark Month be to blame?" The "why" doesn't matter. Action is what is needed.
I want to be you when I grow up. Learn from others positive actions and make those actions your action.
I could be hitting menopause too. Maybe. Don't let it get in your way.
WAY better since I started this thread. Excellent. And your positive actions will yield positive results.
But I know I'm not back 100% yet. Successive approximation towards the goal is a step in the right direction. I doubt anyone is ever 100% all the time.
I've also been longing for someone near by to do this with. You're longing for YOU to do this.
She is super busy with school and band stuff so she won't/can't keep me accountable for eating or walking and I can't expect her to. You need to do it. You are not Anna's responsibility (you, of course, know that). Change yourself.
I want someone to get me out of bed at 0600 to work out and to keep me motivated. And what will you do if/when that someone isn't there? Actions. Determination. Behave your way to success.
I want a local keto friend. Be a friend to yourself. You're the only person that is with you 24/7.
Wow...could I be more full blown into my own self pity? Crimeny! No. You're pretty full blown in your post.
It's ok. You're talking yourself through it. You're acknowledging it. Now take action. Egad. I sound like Dr. Phil. "You can't change what you don't acknowledge".
I
you @RowdysLady . You came here (back in April or whenever) to kick *kitten* or chew bubblegum. Run out of bubblegum.
Kathy sheepishly hits "post reply".
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@kpk54. Thanks Dr. Phil. I am trying and will get there.
methinks I was just squarely kicked in the *kitten*...but in the best possible way. I you too! 3 -
RowdysLady wrote: »@kpk54. Thanks Dr. Phil. I am trying and will get there.
methinks I was just squarely kicked in the *kitten*...but in the best possible way. I you too!
Kathy sighs with relief. Whew!4 -
RowdysLady wrote: »@elize7 "All systems go, no excuses" That's exactly what I want back....You said it Sister!
@authrowriter problem is I'm not craving them. I'm just eating them because they are there. Literally they don't even taste good. How much do I suck, right? Plus I've let other stuff go too, like the logging and moving.
@kennygang I want to be you when I grow up "So I will stick to it..."
So, it dawned on me today actually that my cycle has been in full force nearly a month now. That's a new twist for me. I've been Keto (cept for the last month) since April. Could Shark Month be to blame? Probably not, but I'd like to think so... I could be hitting menopause too. I'm 42 so that could be sneaking its way in. I don't know. I've been better - WAY better since I started this thread and you guys have been so crazy helpful. But I know I'm not back 100% yet. "All systems go, no excuses". That's what I want again.
I've also been longing for someone near by to do this with. Of course Anna is still trying but she's 100 carbs and I'm 20. She is super busy with school and band stuff so she won't/can't keep me accountable for eating or walking and I can't expect her to. My job as Mom is to help her succeed. I want someone to get me out of bed at 0600 to work out and to keep me motivated. I want a local keto friend. My nearest is about 70 miles away...and I love her dearly but well 70 miles. Wow...could I be more full blown into my own self pity? Crimeny!
@RowdysLady - I need to get up at 4 to work out. I think I'm 2 hours ahead of you. We could be accountable to each other. 2 -
Let's see....if I respond to this then I actually have to do it because Cadori will know if I don't and tell on me. If I don't respond then I'm clearly not helping myself and I am now a whiny person who won't even help herself when help is offered....Jimeny cricket...@Cadori really? You just put it out there to the world that I'll get up and work out now because you'll hold me accountable. Geez, woman! There's no getting out of this now. If you can do 4 a.m. then surely I can do 6 a.m.
Being silly, of course....I will message you.... I'd love the accountability.5 -
RowdysLady wrote: »Let's see....if I respond to this then I actually have to do it because Cadori will know if I don't and tell on me. If I don't respond then I'm clearly not helping myself and I am now a whiny person who won't even help herself when help is offered....Jimeny cricket...@Cadori really? You just put it out there to the world that I'll get up and work out now because you'll hold me accountable. Geez, woman! There's no getting out of this now. If you can do 4 a.m. then surely I can do 6 a.m.
Being silly, of course....I will message you.... I'd love the accountability. 1 -
Self-Sabotage...Story of my life, especially when real life gets rough!
Threads like these are extremely helpful.2 -
RowdysLady wrote: »@kpk54. Thanks Dr. Phil. I am trying and will get there.
methinks I was just squarely kicked in the *kitten*...but in the best possible way. I you too!
Isn't she just the best ever? I love getting a swift kick in the dupka.1 -
I'm trying to figure this out myself as well. I did really well for a month...about 8 months ago. And then I start and fail, start and fail, start and fail.... Now I'm back up to my old weight and starting again.
One thing I'm changing is that IF/when I screw up and give into temptation, I'm not going to just write off the rest of the day like I have been doing. Up until now, if I have a couple of chips, I then just eat whatever for the rest of the day saying to myself, 'Well, I've already gone off plan so I may as well just give in to all the rest of the junk'.
It has been an 'all or nothing' approach until now. Hopefully this change will help me.
There is some type of mental/emotional thing that is unresolved for me, and I'm not really sure how to get to it.1 -
hang in there @food_lover16. It's tough but together we can all do this!0
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SuperCarLori wrote: »You're really Rosey!
You're Rosey Real!
You're a great big deal!
That's referencing Rose Madder-Stephen King
Just for the record, I may have butchered it some.
Carole King - the nutshell library - I remember that!
I'm really rosie
I'm rosie real
you better believe me
I'm a great big deal
I'm a star from a far off the golden coast
beat that drum
make that toast
to rosie the most
belieeeeeeve me
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Remember how moms used to expose their kids to chicken pox by having a play date with the sick kid?
May I recommend common cold parties for stopping binge behaviors!! Lol. I can hardly even look at much less taste food since I got this cold. Stopped the binge in it's tracks. Just like that!!!
I feel so sick, but so thrilled. Hopefully when it passes I'll be decarbed enough to not have cravings!
Have a great weekend, pals!3
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