Me Vs. the Binge -- August 2017 Challenge
Replies
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PetitClapotis wrote: »dianna1286 wrote: »I binged yesterday before finding this post. Maybe this is what i needed...
Today is a new day!
Welcome! You got this! Check in when you feel the urge to binge. We're all here for you!
thank you so much!!0 -
Me: 4
The B: 3
@KnitOrMiss thanks so much for the book rec. I read something similar in another book about making changes, but the title escapes me. I may pull it back out for a reread.
@PetitClapotis you're definitely right. I am stressed because there has been a lot of transition in the past couple of weeks with a move, leaving my job, starting grad school, etc. I hope things calm down soon. I was able to make it yesterday, so I am very happy about that.
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dianna1286 wrote: »I binged yesterday before finding this post. Maybe this is what i needed...
Today is a new day!
Welcome!
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1
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brittdee88 wrote: »Me: 4
The B: 3
@PetitClapotis you're definitely right. I am stressed because there has been a lot of transition in the past couple of weeks with a move, leaving my job, starting grad school, etc. I hope things calm down soon. I was able to make it yesterday, so I am very happy about that.
Congrats! I'm so happy for you! You're gonna have lots of fun getting back to school!1 -
Me: 8
B: 0
DBF: 232 -
I just started logging in again about a week ago after yet another lapse into bad eating habits. I was thinking that a good goal for me this time around would be to try to stay on track with my calorie goals on more days per week than I binged. This might be just the way to hold me accountable. Mind if I try this with you?
Me:6
B:2
DBF:62 -
I just started logging in again about a week ago after yet another lapse into bad eating habits. I was thinking that a good goal for me this time around would be to try to stay on track with my calorie goals on more days per week than I binged. This might be just the way to hold me accountable. Mind if I try this with you?
Me:6
B:2
DBF:6
@kowlady - my most recent dietitian told me as someone who binges to NOT focus on calories, as for most of us that triggers binges. Focus on whole foods, nutrition, and get as much protein as I can, keep the carbs and fats lower, other than as accents - veggies (non-starchy) are pretty much unlimited, etc... So NO calorie counting, in fact, no macro counting - just "loose tracking." That was her suggestion. So far, struggling to make protein my focus, but just a thought...1 -
Thanks, @PetitClapotis!
I echo @KnitOrMiss. I was also advised not to count, and I generally avoid it. I really have no idea why, but putting in everything I plan to eat ahead of time makes me feel like I'm missing out on something, and I almost always end up eating more or binging at the end of the day. It's almost like I feel sad that that signifies the end of what I get to eat that day or something. It's very bizarre.
I will input my meals every now and then to make sure I'm not undereating since I still struggle with past ED-thinking and will occasionally feel guilty about eating altogether. As a mostly whole-foods vegan, this is particularly problematic because I can get full very quickly on very low calories, so if I feel like I am not eating enough or if I can't seem to stop binging no matter how hard I try, I will put in a few past meals for the nutrition report so that I can adjust in the future to ensure I'm getting all I need on a daily basis. Sustained under eating always ends in a multi-day binge session for me. The only things that have worked for me in terms of losing weight while vegan without counting anything is to eat 2-3 square meals a day with no snacks and to limit sweets to weekends and/or special occasions. Eating this way helps to naturally reduce my desire to binge (eating heartily but less often reduces my hunger) and it doesn't feel restrictive because I get to eat a lot at mealtimes, so I also don't feel triggered to binge due to feeling denied either.
Me: 5
The B: 31 -
Me: 8
B: 0
DBF: 8
Not binging but still completely off-track...or so I assume because I haven't been tracking. Interesting hearing that NOT tracking might actually be a good thing- maybe I should avoid tracking for a month and see how I do on my own. Just makes me nervous because I have a tendency to be "out of sight, our of mind" when I'm not tracking, and I go overboard. I'm with you though, @brittdee88 - I never had an ED, per se, but I had "disordered eating"- I thought I was ginormous at 115 lbs in high school (20 years ago), and maintained my weight through very unhealthy ways. It's probably a reason I have some of the issues I have now.0 -
brittdee88 wrote: »Thanks, @PetitClapotis!
I echo @KnitOrMiss. I was also advised not to count, and I generally avoid it. I really have no idea why, but putting in everything I plan to eat ahead of time makes me feel like I'm missing out on something, and I almost always end up eating more or binging at the end of the day. It's almost like I feel sad that that signifies the end of what I get to eat that day or something. It's very bizarre.
I will input my meals every now and then to make sure I'm not undereating since I still struggle with past ED-thinking and will occasionally feel guilty about eating altogether. As a mostly whole-foods vegan, this is particularly problematic because I can get full very quickly on very low calories, so if I feel like I am not eating enough or if I can't seem to stop binging no matter how hard I try, I will put in a few past meals for the nutrition report so that I can adjust in the future to ensure I'm getting all I need on a daily basis. Sustained under eating always ends in a multi-day binge session for me. The only things that have worked for me in terms of losing weight while vegan without counting anything is to eat 2-3 square meals a day with no snacks and to limit sweets to weekends and/or special occasions. Eating this way helps to naturally reduce my desire to binge (eating heartily but less often reduces my hunger) and it doesn't feel restrictive because I get to eat a lot at mealtimes, so I also don't feel triggered to binge due to feeling denied either.
Me: 5
The B: 3
There is a script you can use on the PC browser that hides calories from you, @brittdee88 . It shows your macros and such, but hides the calories column. I don't know if that would help you, but I can look it up if you think it might...
That being said, I'm on the opposite side. The act of tracking (I'm a detail-oriented perfectionist) leaves me extremely stressed out. That stress triggers a chemical reaction, and before long, I'm down the rabbit hole. I can honestly say, I don't think I've ever "under-eaten" in my life. I'm still trying to find my way back to my best eating plan...it's hard, as my thyroid doesn't like playing well with others. LOL1 -
Thanks @KnitOrMiss and @brittdee88 for the advice. I will take that into consideration. However, like @Moxie42 the thought makes me nervous because I tend to have my worst binges when I'm NOT counting. It's like if I don't count it, it doesn't count. So I end up eating whatever I want, whenever I want and binging almost every day.2
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overate big time yesterday not to the point of binge though
disturbed sleep, heavy flow and stress made me hungrier than usual but didn't have the uncontrollable urge to binge 
I'm currently tracking what I'm eating to pin down food reactions and also binge triggers. Not counting calories or macros diligently since I'm trying to quit the habit and practice intuitive eating. And I don't seriously weigh myself either as losing pounds is not my main goal. I'd step on the balance board to check my weight occasionally when my husband plays Wii, just being curious 
I'm with you @brittdee88, counting put me in a bad place it made me anxious and obsessed with food. 2 -
Me: 9
B: 0
Days binge-free: 223 -
Thanks @KnitOrMiss and @brittdee88 for the advice. I will take that into consideration. However, like @Moxie42 the thought makes me nervous because I tend to have my worst binges when I'm NOT counting. It's like if I don't count it, it doesn't count. So I end up eating whatever I want, whenever I want and binging almost every day.
Same here!!! I'm not sure I want to risk trying it because of that but it's kind of a chicken-and-the-egg situation. Am I binging because I'm not counting? Or am I not counting because I'm binging? Idk, when I feel like I'm in a more stable/strong place emotionally I might give it a shot. If it ends up badly, I'll know that doesn't work for me, lol!
@mae918 - you've got an awesome streak going! Hope all is well 1 -
KnitOrMiss wrote: »I just started logging in again about a week ago after yet another lapse into bad eating habits. I was thinking that a good goal for me this time around would be to try to stay on track with my calorie goals on more days per week than I binged. This might be just the way to hold me accountable. Mind if I try this with you?
Me:6
B:2
DBF:6
@kowlady - my most recent dietitian told me as someone who binges to NOT focus on calories, as for most of us that triggers binges. Focus on whole foods, nutrition, and get as much protein as I can, keep the carbs and fats lower, other than as accents - veggies (non-starchy) are pretty much unlimited, etc... So NO calorie counting, in fact, no macro counting - just "loose tracking." That was her suggestion. So far, struggling to make protein my focus, but just a thought...
This worked well for me!
When coming off a binge, if I went right back on my diet (which was generally too restrictive) I'd kick right back into another binge within 3 days. I did best to do as @KnitOrMiss has mentioned and ignore calories for a bit (not forever) just to get myself past that re-binge stage when the only food I think about (pizza, cupcakes, etc) is stuff I shouldn't have. After about 2 weeks that urge to binge on pizza/cupcakes kind of fades away & fruit starts tasting good (sweet) again.
My past binges tended to be very high calorie (at least 8000 calories) & I never wanted to log that as I really didn't want to know just how "bad" they really were. I only recently figured this out by temporarily logging some of my past binges into MFP just to see how bad they got & was shocked that the calories for my typical binge meal was about triple what I thought it would be.
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My update for August 9, 2017...sorry if this is a bit long but it's a "milestone" for me!
Me: 9
Binge: 0
Days Binge Free: 94
My BED (Binge Eating Disorder) NSV (Non Scale Victory) has finally arrived!--since my last binge episode was more than 90 days ago (on 5/7/2017), I'm now clinically cleared of my BED & no longer meet the clinical criteria for having BED. My follow-up appointment with my Eating Disorder Dr isn't until mid-September so nothing "official" can go back to my PCP (Primary Care Physician) until then but I don't feel like I'll be likely to have any binge episodes before then anyway, but until then, I'm being extra careful.
What has help me get my Binge Eating Disorder (BED) under control...
1. Keeping my blood sugars under good control (I'm an insulin-dependent diabetic) helped immensely with getting my BED better controlled as I discovered that if my blood sugars got above 140 mg/dl after a meal, I'd get hungry instead of satiated and if my blood sugars got over 200 mg/dl, it would always trigger a binge & those binges would leave me still hungry even after "stuffing" myself--I had to use my meal-time insulin to first bring those blood sugar #'s back down under 140 mg/dl before I'd have any hope of feeling satiated after a meal.
2. Changing to a meal schedule of 4 smaller meals/day with meals separated by 3 hours rather than "a small meal in the morning and a large one between 2pm & 4pm", also helped to stabilize my blood sugars & keep my insulin doses consistent across those 4 meals whereas before I kept getting large swings in blood sugars requiring varying amounts of meal-time insulin at each meal to get the blood sugar back under control. This new meal schedule also kept my hunger in check as it takes me 30-60 minutes to eat and that means I only have to wait another 2-2.5 hours until the next meal vs another 4-4.5 hours on my prior meal schedule which was sometimes just too long for this diabetic to go without eating.
3. The Topamax medication (prescribed by my eating disorder Dr for binge eating) also helped to curb the urges to binge. I especially noticed this when walking past cupcakes at the grocery store & just looking at them but not buying them (I always did before, especially if I hadn't eaten yet) or when their hot-foods deli had old-bay seasoned tater tots & I could smell them, look at them, think about them BUT not buy them (& all the carbs that go with them and the resulting high blood sugar #'s that would result if I did eat them)--I always bought them in the past because I just could NOT resist. I'm on a fairly low dose (75 mg) of Topamax (generic Topiramate) but it seems to be working well. Someday, I'll see if I can do without it but I'm not there yet.
My SV (scale victory) for today (8/9/2017), since it's my weigh-in day (Wednesdays): I've lost 2 lbs since last Wednesday and a total of 77.6 lbs since New Years!
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Me: 9
B: 0
DBF: 24
I don't know how to control my weight or the BINGE without this modern day tool from MFP and counting. I applaud you guys that are going that route and finding success. I also have made a major victory with my wife by not bringing my phone out at a restaurant and asking "how many calories you think this Pad Thai Tofu is"? This is a interesting conversation you guys are having I just hope my BINGE doesn't try to use it against me.3 -
BarneyRubbleMD wrote: »My update for August 9, 2017...sorry if this is a bit long but it's a "milestone" for me!
Me: 9
Binge: 0
Days Binge Free: 94
My BED (Binge Eating Disorder) NSV (Non Scale Victory) has finally arrived!--since my last binge episode was more than 90 days ago (on 5/7/2017), I'm now clinically cleared of my BED & no longer meet the clinical criteria for having BED. My follow-up appointment with my Eating Disorder Dr isn't until mid-September so nothing "official" can go back to my PCP (Primary Care Physician) until then but I don't feel like I'll be likely to have any binge episodes before then anyway, but until then, I'm being extra careful.
What has help me get my Binge Eating Disorder (BED) under control...
1. Keeping my blood sugars under good control (I'm an insulin-dependent diabetic) helped immensely with getting my BED better controlled as I discovered that if my blood sugars got above 140 mg/dl after a meal, I'd get hungry instead of satiated and if my blood sugars got over 200 mg/dl, it would always trigger a binge & those binges would leave me still hungry even after "stuffing" myself--I had to use my meal-time insulin to first bring those blood sugar #'s back down under 140 mg/dl before I'd have any hope of feeling satiated after a meal.
2. Changing to a meal schedule of 4 smaller meals/day with meals separated by 3 hours rather than "a small meal in the morning and a large one between 2pm & 4pm", also helped to stabilize my blood sugars & keep my insulin doses consistent across those 4 meals whereas before I kept getting large swings in blood sugars requiring varying amounts of meal-time insulin at each meal to get the blood sugar back under control. This new meal schedule also kept my hunger in check as it takes me 30-60 minutes to eat and that means I only have to wait another 2-2.5 hours until the next meal vs another 4-4.5 hours on my prior meal schedule which was sometimes just too long for this diabetic to go without eating.
3. The Topamax medication (prescribed by my eating disorder Dr for binge eating) also helped to curb the urges to binge. I especially noticed this when walking past cupcakes at the grocery store & just looking at them but not buying them (I always did before, especially if I hadn't eaten yet) or when their hot-foods deli had old-bay seasoned tater tots & I could smell them, look at them, think about them BUT not buy them (& all the carbs that go with them and the resulting high blood sugar #'s that would result if I did eat them)--I always bought them in the past because I just could NOT resist. I'm on a fairly low dose (75 mg) of Topamax (generic Topiramate) but it seems to be working well. Someday, I'll see if I can do without it but I'm not there yet.
My SV (scale victory) for today (8/9/2017), since it's my weigh-in day (Wednesdays): I've lost 2 lbs since last Wednesday and a total of 77.6 lbs since New Years!
That's amazing! Thank you for sharing! Congrats!!!1 -
I have zero control with peanut butter and it was ugly yesterday
I cannot be trusted around peanut butter 
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0
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dianna1286 wrote: »I binged yesterday before finding this post. Maybe this is what i needed...
Today is a new day!
Welcome!
0 -
Aug 9
Me: 9*
Binge: 0
DBF: 91 -
hillmike56 wrote: »Me: 9
B: 0
DBF: 24
I don't know how to control my weight or the BINGE without this modern day tool from MFP and counting. I applaud you guys that are going that route and finding success. I also have made a major victory with my wife by not bringing my phone out at a restaurant and asking "how many calories you think this Pad Thai Tofu is"? This is a interesting conversation you guys are having I just hope my BINGE doesn't try to use it against me.
@hillmike56 - Don't get me wrong, I'm not making any forward progress with weight currently either, but I'm not gaining... I'm trying to get into a new pattern of thinking, and it's so different from anything I've attempted before, so it's kind of a painful learning process... I either have to use a more restrictive plan (lower carb or lower fat) and/or more extreme options(crazy low cal) to lose...but, I think if I can get settled into this mindset on food, I can start to wrap my mind around getting more active again... My body is suffering from injuries and neglect and condition related muscle weakness and exercise limitations... It's all a struggle, but I've learned that focusing on only one thing at a time gives me better chances at long term success...
Kudos for driving your wife a little less crazy along the way, too...0 -
BarneyRubbleMD wrote: »My update for August 9, 2017...sorry if this is a bit long but it's a "milestone" for me!
Me: 9
Binge: 0
Days Binge Free: 94
My BED (Binge Eating Disorder) NSV (Non Scale Victory) has finally arrived!--since my last binge episode was more than 90 days ago (on 5/7/2017), I'm now clinically cleared of my BED & no longer meet the clinical criteria for having BED. My follow-up appointment with my Eating Disorder Dr isn't until mid-September so nothing "official" can go back to my PCP (Primary Care Physician) until then but I don't feel like I'll be likely to have any binge episodes before then anyway, but until then, I'm being extra careful.
What has help me get my Binge Eating Disorder (BED) under control...
1. Keeping my blood sugars under good control (I'm an insulin-dependent diabetic) helped immensely with getting my BED better controlled as I discovered that if my blood sugars got above 140 mg/dl after a meal, I'd get hungry instead of satiated and if my blood sugars got over 200 mg/dl, it would always trigger a binge & those binges would leave me still hungry even after "stuffing" myself--I had to use my meal-time insulin to first bring those blood sugar #'s back down under 140 mg/dl before I'd have any hope of feeling satiated after a meal.
2. Changing to a meal schedule of 4 smaller meals/day with meals separated by 3 hours rather than "a small meal in the morning and a large one between 2pm & 4pm", also helped to stabilize my blood sugars & keep my insulin doses consistent across those 4 meals whereas before I kept getting large swings in blood sugars requiring varying amounts of meal-time insulin at each meal to get the blood sugar back under control. This new meal schedule also kept my hunger in check as it takes me 30-60 minutes to eat and that means I only have to wait another 2-2.5 hours until the next meal vs another 4-4.5 hours on my prior meal schedule which was sometimes just too long for this diabetic to go without eating.
3. The Topamax medication (prescribed by my eating disorder Dr for binge eating) also helped to curb the urges to binge. I especially noticed this when walking past cupcakes at the grocery store & just looking at them but not buying them (I always did before, especially if I hadn't eaten yet) or when their hot-foods deli had old-bay seasoned tater tots & I could smell them, look at them, think about them BUT not buy them (& all the carbs that go with them and the resulting high blood sugar #'s that would result if I did eat them)--I always bought them in the past because I just could NOT resist. I'm on a fairly low dose (75 mg) of Topamax (generic Topiramate) but it seems to be working well. Someday, I'll see if I can do without it but I'm not there yet.
My SV (scale victory) for today (8/9/2017), since it's my weigh-in day (Wednesdays): I've lost 2 lbs since last Wednesday and a total of 77.6 lbs since New Years!
@BarneyRubbleMD - CONGRATULATIONS!!! This is absolutely fabulous!!! Topamax is one of the meds (in combo with another) that was mentioned to me by a new doc who just wanted to give me weight loss drugs, and I declined, as that wasn't the one she ended up prescribing, and the one she did write out was one that had interactions with another medication I take...so I just passed on it all... I've been doing okay with l-glutamine for this...but I'll definitely consider Topamax as another option. Thanks for that perspective!1 -
PetitClapotis wrote: »I have zero control with peanut butter and it was ugly yesterday I cannot be trusted around peanut butter
@PetitClapotis - Most peanut butter is what they call the perfect storm - the perfect balance of sweet, salty, and fatty... It sets off dopamine reactions in your brain. So don't feel too badly, sincerely. The industry has geared that product against you. I find that almond butter does okay for me, but if sweetened, I have that same reaction to it... You can actually try the natural butter (just salt, nuts) to see if it's that trifecta for you... Some folks taste the natural sweetness of the nuts, still, but fewer folks find this a trigger.2 -
KnitOrMiss wrote: »BarneyRubbleMD wrote: »My update for August 9, 2017...sorry if this is a bit long but it's a "milestone" for me!
Me: 9
Binge: 0
Days Binge Free: 94
My BED (Binge Eating Disorder) NSV (Non Scale Victory) has finally arrived!--since my last binge episode was more than 90 days ago (on 5/7/2017), I'm now clinically cleared of my BED & no longer meet the clinical criteria for having BED. My follow-up appointment with my Eating Disorder Dr isn't until mid-September so nothing "official" can go back to my PCP (Primary Care Physician) until then but I don't feel like I'll be likely to have any binge episodes before then anyway, but until then, I'm being extra careful.
What has help me get my Binge Eating Disorder (BED) under control...
1. Keeping my blood sugars under good control (I'm an insulin-dependent diabetic) helped immensely with getting my BED better controlled as I discovered that if my blood sugars got above 140 mg/dl after a meal, I'd get hungry instead of satiated and if my blood sugars got over 200 mg/dl, it would always trigger a binge & those binges would leave me still hungry even after "stuffing" myself--I had to use my meal-time insulin to first bring those blood sugar #'s back down under 140 mg/dl before I'd have any hope of feeling satiated after a meal.
2. Changing to a meal schedule of 4 smaller meals/day with meals separated by 3 hours rather than "a small meal in the morning and a large one between 2pm & 4pm", also helped to stabilize my blood sugars & keep my insulin doses consistent across those 4 meals whereas before I kept getting large swings in blood sugars requiring varying amounts of meal-time insulin at each meal to get the blood sugar back under control. This new meal schedule also kept my hunger in check as it takes me 30-60 minutes to eat and that means I only have to wait another 2-2.5 hours until the next meal vs another 4-4.5 hours on my prior meal schedule which was sometimes just too long for this diabetic to go without eating.
3. The Topamax medication (prescribed by my eating disorder Dr for binge eating) also helped to curb the urges to binge. I especially noticed this when walking past cupcakes at the grocery store & just looking at them but not buying them (I always did before, especially if I hadn't eaten yet) or when their hot-foods deli had old-bay seasoned tater tots & I could smell them, look at them, think about them BUT not buy them (& all the carbs that go with them and the resulting high blood sugar #'s that would result if I did eat them)--I always bought them in the past because I just could NOT resist. I'm on a fairly low dose (75 mg) of Topamax (generic Topiramate) but it seems to be working well. Someday, I'll see if I can do without it but I'm not there yet.
My SV (scale victory) for today (8/9/2017), since it's my weigh-in day (Wednesdays): I've lost 2 lbs since last Wednesday and a total of 77.6 lbs since New Years!
@BarneyRubbleMD - CONGRATULATIONS!!! This is absolutely fabulous!!! Topamax is one of the meds (in combo with another) that was mentioned to me by a new doc who just wanted to give me weight loss drugs, and I declined, as that wasn't the one she ended up prescribing, and the one she did write out was one that had interactions with another medication I take...so I just passed on it all... I've been doing okay with l-glutamine for this...but I'll definitely consider Topamax as another option. Thanks for that perspective!
@KnitOrMiss ,
At the time of my Dr visit, I had never heard of Topamax. I had asked about Vyvanse being used to treat binge eating disorder but that can raise blood pressure & the Dr didn't want to also have to increase my BP meds & recommended Topamax instead. She said that some binge eaters are helped by Vyvanse while others are not and the same with Topamax and I wouldn't really know until I tried it, starting out with a low dose (50mg) and moving up from there. I noticed a difference at 50mg but we settled on 75mg & I've been there since.
I didn't know about Topamax being a weight loss medication, although, if it helps me binge less, that's got to help with weight loss too (& it certainly has). Topamax was originally used (when taken in high doses) to control seizures & for treating migraines but people who took it reported that it reduced the "hyper-palatable" effect of foods like pizza or Doritos or cupcakes (i.e. my trigger foods). Now that I'm taking it and occasionally will have a slice of pizza for a meal, I do notice that pizza no longer has that same "wow" factor when I eat it like it had in the past that drove me back to eat more slices of pizza. I think that's why I can get by now with just 1 slice of pizza at a meal along with my other veggies & a fruit to help fill me up instead of eating 4-6 slices of pizza and then trying to deal with the high blood sugars that result.
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@BarneyRubbleMD - Qysmia was what my doc Rx'd, and nope.... Wasn't into that...due to the pentermine, which is probably what put you and your doc off of it too... I had forgotten that it was the one with Topamax. Since I did develop ocular migraines over a year ago, I might consider this, even though they are currently well managed by avoiding fermented foods and taking a second dose of my BP pills... Definitely will keep it as a back up option! Thanks for the info.1
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@BarneyRubbleMD CONGRATS!!!!!
It's so interesting reading about all the different triggers. I cannot tell you all how much it means that I can actually talk about triggers with people and not be met with a willpower argument or rolled eyes. Eating and food is so inconsequential to many people around me, and I always feel completely neurotic about it. It feels good to be in company with you all.
@PetitClapotis I am like that with homemade Nutella. I have to make it verrrry rarely (which isn't too hard considering how expensive hazelnuts can be), and when I do, I usually eat half a jar in one setting.
Me: 6
The B: 32 -
brittdee88 wrote: »@PetitClapotis I am like that with homemade Nutella. I have to make it verrrry rarely (which isn't too hard considering how expensive hazelnuts can be), and when I do, I usually eat half a jar in one setting.
Me: 6
The B: 3
That's exactly what I did yesterday. I opened a jar and said I was just gonna have one tbsp and then bam! Ended with the whole jar gone in one sitting... Today I woke up so bloated, puffy eyes and have horrible toothache. I loathe myself!!!0
