Thoughts, Epiphanies, Insights, & Quotables
Options
Replies
-
3 -
What we trying kind lady? I need one on banging head!!!!1
-
Two separate issues the good enough and creep back. You were doing some pull down before Christmas were you not? What was the secret sauce on that?
I don't trust my weight numbers because they are not as clean as they were with daily weight in no matter what
So definitely a tendency to ignore high and over stress lows
In any case at least I'm slowly returning to before dad move unless I derail like last year with his new shenanigans!2 -
Duh! 🙄. I’m TRYING not to just throw up my hands and say this is good enough. And the weight will creep back. So I need to stick with what got me some measure of success.
@Yoolypr have you considered taking a break?
I don't mean a break of the type that many people on the MFP forums take - which is just another term for completely throwing in the towel forever and returning to all the old bad habits in lightning time.
I mean a deliberately-considered, planned, timetabled break for a strictly pre-determined period.
I did this once, and it was a life-saver. Like you I'd been yo-yoing 5lbs for about 6 months and I felt completely demoralised. Every day, the temptation to just pack it all in became just that little bit stronger, because it was mentally enhausting to have to battle constantly. I felt weary to the bone of the whole process of weight loss and maintenance.
Even so, the thought of taking a break was scary. VERY scary, What if it was akin to an alcoholic taking one drink and then never being able to stop again? What if I gained 20lb and couldn't lose them again? What if I opened a Pandora's box that I couldn't close again?
I did it anyway, but I PLANNED it, so that I still felt like I was in CONTROL of the process. It was something I was CHOOSING to do to recharge my mental batteries, it was a POSITIVE decision, not a NEGATIVE lapse in willpower.
These words in capitals were the things I kept reminding myself, because it's important to still retain that feeling of being in control, because once you mentally feel like you've lost control everything gets much, much harder.
My approach was to set a strict timetable. My break started when I got up on XX day, and finished when I went to bed on YY day. I allowed myself 2 whole weeks, which felt like sufficient time to have a mental re-set and give my body a little energy boost, but not so long that I lost touch with the mindset of running a deficit.
I didn't give myself licence to go mad....I still made sensible choices, but I ate around 500 calories a day more than I had been eating up to that point. That way I knew that at worse I'd gain a couple of pounds in the two weeks over what I maybe would've gained anyway through being only half-heartedly on plan.
I also checked in here for support...
For me it worked. The extra calories were lovely - they allowed me to a have a few treats that I'd been denying myself, but in reality I didn't use the 500 additional calories on cakes and sweets, I used them to eat proper food - just a little more than usual.
And by the end of the 14 days I felt re-energised and ready to recommit with renewed vigour and enthusiasm.
Sometimes compromise and pragmatism are the most sensible options. When forcing yourself to stay on plan isn't working well for you at the moment, sometimes you need to be willing to risk a different approach. As long as you do it under controlled conditions, and for a strictly limited period of time, it can be a diet-saver...
Anyway Yooly, whatever you decide to do, good luck with it! It's horrible to struggle - we've all been there! - so I hope something works for you soon and you regain your mojo! Big hugs!3 -
Thank you Bella for your words of wisdom and encouragement. I’m not sure how I’ll get past this funk. But am willing to try….3
-
Share more about funk when you feel up to. You did have an eventful year with far too many extra unanticipated stressful and sad trips plus all the happier pre-planned ones. You weren't doing badly through most of that time. Hand issue came about and hit you hard? What's been going on with Yooly?
re: your above statement. I understand the struggle with "this is good enough" vs "not good enough". But where do the "give up" talk and "weight creep back" talk bits come from--other than understandably natural fears of course?
1 -
So many good words here, Yooly. We all support you and care very much about how you are faring. Sometimes you use all your strength being strong through repeated crises ... then when the freaking circus has passed there is little left.2
-
I appreciate all the support and kind words. So thoughtful and appreciated 🙏
My funk is - I don’t know? A combination of frustration, loss and anxiety. Some exhaustion too maybe. It’s been a hard year. Lots of sadness but celebration too.
And then there’s the broken wrist and a couple of bruising stumbles and falls. I’m not the most physically graceful person at best. The result has been lots of sedentary time - which calls for soothing snacks, no?
I just got to the point where I asked myself whether at age 76 it’s worth agonizing over a ten pound regain. Can I live with that? Is it a precursor of regaining the other 💯 pounds? How much time in my limited life expectancy do I want to fight this? Then again, my mother and most women in my family lived well into their 90s. What if I have 20 more freaking years ahead of me!!! I want those years to be as good as possible.
I need to get my head back into the game before I can make any progress. But right now my head - and body- are tired.
2 -
Yooly, imo (as a fat person still in need of losing the 100 lbs, mind you) it is NOT worth agonizing over the 10 lbs, unless it means you are uncomfortable in your clothes, etc. Otherwise it is just a number in the scale that is still within range, but on the higher side granted.
You've had a tough year. You are exhausted. Perhaps a break as Bella outlined, but with a longer timeframe (like 3 months, or to June 1st, or something), is a warranted right now? With a firm promise to not creep any higher meantime, but to truly rest, with focus on health mentally and time to regain your strength physically. And thereby stave off a potential full fall from grace. Just my 2 cents!2 -
Thanks BC! Your two cents is worth a lot! I’m worrying over 10 pounds because at my preferred maintenance weight I’m still considered an overweight bmi. I'm treading a fine line here. And I’m genetically built like all my peasant Slavic ancestors. Not a skinny woman in the bunch - built to work behind a plow!
My doctor is happy with my being slightly overweight at my age. Kind of a reserve against possible future catastrophic illness. I guess chubby old ladies do better than frail thin ladies.
The quandary is holding the line and not sliding into obesity again. Thus my agonizing!2 -
Objective: 76yo BMI 24 to 26 = zero (apriori and based on BMI and not a particular individual) difference in terms of health outcomes
Subjective: I most certainly used the "I am still trying to lose weight" technique to MAINTAIN my weight the first COUPLE of years of maintenance. I can most certainly understand the fear.
Feeling tired? Obviously not good. Obviously check for the "normal stuff": bloods and this that and the other.
Major point. Temporarily (or even longer term) not pursuing weight loss is NOT license to allow weight regain or to start adding cookies to meals that didn't use to have them. If you do and if you don't increase activity to compensate yeah, it ain't going to work.
But adding a baked or boiled potato to the previous meal instead of trying to create a deficit? That I would most certainly entertain!
That said if you've been more or less maintaining (including a careful look at your trend), I wouldn't go around adding a whole WHACK of calories. I would keep things more to 2-250 extra and maybe even time before/after exercise to ensure that the exercise itself if fueled and energetic
Those are my thought now... but it depends a lot on you and how you feel and whether there are other issues potentially going on! And yes. Wholesome old ladies with strength training do better than the rest!!!
2 -
Yooly - I'm sending you hugs and energy. I personally don't know how to maintain. When I was maintaining - I was actually still trying to lose. And when I was trying to maintain - I was gaining. I understand your fear.
Maybe the answer lies in not thinking about food as a way to refuel our energy? Just occurred to me now
People who do not battle with their weight don't turn to food - so what do they turn to instead? 2 -
For me it’s really not physical fatigue but overwhelming mental fatigue. Tired of constantly thinking about food control. I thought I’d accepted that as part of maintenance- but apparently not.
. Sex? Shopping channel? Hobbies? Religion? Obviously I don’t know because I have ALWAYS turned to food.lauriekallis wrote: »People who do not battle with their weight don't turn to food - so what do they turn to instead?
1 -
Nor do I, Yooly, nor do I.
I understood you meant mental fatigue.
I do enjoy movies they seem like a wonderful break from "reality." I used to read quite a bit, but that is still a bit challenging. But movies I'm liking a lot lately. Off to see a matinee today. PERFECT DAYS. Seeeing for the second time. An absolutely brilliant film - very peaceful overall. 2 -
Was thinking further...
Discipline does take a lot of energy. If we are feeling good and life is relatively balance we don't need a lot of discipline to eat well. But when food has been a big source of comfort - and life is out of balance - suddenly a lot more discipline is required.3 -
You’re right Laurie. I need to find my balance again.1
-
lauriekallis wrote: »Maybe the answer lies in not thinking about food as a way to refuel our energy? Just occurred to me now People who do not battle with their weight don't turn to food - so what do they turn to instead?
So I may be misunderstanding this one.
Food IS energy especially in the short term. Of course, using food as energy instead of sleeping when over-tired is counterproductive for weight management for sure!
Using food as soothing or something to do or under various circumstances that do NOT have anything to do with energy needs is also quite counterproductive for our weight management!
That one I don't have as clear cut an answer for myself as compared to the "tired" bit.
I mean I sometimes manage to convert it to pacing. But I've definitely caught myself munching WHILE pacing!
-- Laurie Books vs Eyes... potential answer = AUDIOBOOK. Also way more compatible with canines!1 -
Though I spent years YEARS recording and presenting podcasts of writers reading their work (or maybe because of?) I really don't like audio books
The energy I was referring to was that sort of psychic energy - when you are just so drained emotionally + and exhausted that you are left scrambling for ways to recover your mojo.
Yooly - it will be much easier to find your balance when life stops rolling you around on the tilt-a-whirl. I was just thinking it won't always feel as tough as it does now. Monitoring your intake I mean?2 -
Ah. That energy! 🤯
There is a Laurie podcast????🤣
2
