Leashes for Kids
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Adiran, maybe it would be more clear if you stated what you think the harm or problem is? There aren't any adverse effects by using a leash on a child (to either the parent or the child)-at least not by default. I'm sure it could be used incorrectly and abused, but we can make the same statement about play pens or cribs.
You seem to dislike it on principle, which is fine. You're allowed. But I guess I would have expected such an emphatic preference to be based on something more concrete than a visceral and general "don't treat kids like dogs" response. Perhaps I'm not interpreting your true objections correctly?
It doesn't teach them anything, it's just a short term tool. And it is embarrassing for the child. And it does remind me of a dog.0 -
Actually Adrian very few people posted examples of severely autistic kids. I think mine was the only one and that was long after multiple examples of amusement parks and crowded stores. I even stated that my oldest would ask for the leash because it was easier on him than holding my hand in a crowded place.
I still haven't heard any answer as to how putting a kid on a leash is lazy but putting them in a stroller or shopping buggy isn't.0 -
Actually Adrian very few people posted examples of severely autistic kids. I think mine was the only one and that was long after multiple examples of amusement parks and crowded stores. I even stated that my oldest would ask for the leash because it was easier on him than holding my hand in a crowded place.
I still haven't heard any answer as to how putting a kid on a leash is lazy but putting them in a stroller or shopping buggy isn't.
You haven't heard me call it lazy either.0 -
Adiran, maybe it would be more clear if you stated what you think the harm or problem is? There aren't any adverse effects by using a leash on a child (to either the parent or the child)-at least not by default. I'm sure it could be used incorrectly and abused, but we can make the same statement about play pens or cribs.
You seem to dislike it on principle, which is fine. You're allowed. But I guess I would have expected such an emphatic preference to be based on something more concrete than a visceral and general "don't treat kids like dogs" response. Perhaps I'm not interpreting your true objections correctly?
It doesn't teach them anything, it's just a short term tool. And it is embarrassing for the child. And it does remind me of a dog.
Well, I guess I would say that it doesn't have to teach them anything, though I would probably disagree with you. I've seen more than one child spend minutes testing the limits of their leash and attempting to figure how to "trick" or get out of it, and they weren't upset either. No more upset than a child is when attempting to figure out a safety lock on a baby gate anyway. I think it teaches critical thinking skills.Personal opinion but the fact that it doesn't modify their behavior is sort of irrelevant. And I don't see anything particularly wrong with short term tools.
And while I can't speak for anyone else, I promise you, being on a leash wasn't in the least bit embarrassing for me. So I don't really think we can make those generalized statements. But I can definitely accept that your view is simply different than mine.1 -
Adiran, maybe it would be more clear if you stated what you think the harm or problem is? There aren't any adverse effects by using a leash on a child (to either the parent or the child)-at least not by default. I'm sure it could be used incorrectly and abused, but we can make the same statement about play pens or cribs.
You seem to dislike it on principle, which is fine. You're allowed. But I guess I would have expected such an emphatic preference to be based on something more concrete than a visceral and general "don't treat kids like dogs" response. Perhaps I'm not interpreting your true objections correctly?
It doesn't teach them anything, it's just a short term tool. And it is embarrassing for the child. And it does remind me of a dog.
Well, I guess I would say that it doesn't have to teach them anything, though I would probably disagree with you. I've seen more than one child spend minutes testing the limits of their leash and attempting to figure how to "trick" or get out of it, and they weren't upset either. No more upset than a child is when attempting to figure out a safety lock on a baby gate anyway. I think it teaches critical thinking skills.Personal opinion but the fact that it doesn't modify their behavior is sort of irrelevant. And I don't see anything particularly wrong with short term tools.
And while I can't speak for anyone else, I promise you, being on a leash wasn't in the least bit embarrassing for me. So I don't really think we can make those generalized statements. But I can definitely accept that your view is simply different than mine.
Well I can say this, on this one issue, I did have a gut reaction and went with it where I usually stop and reflect on an issue. Truth be told, I am not often in an airport, in the big city, or any other scenario where people have said they used a leash. But I just can't see myself ever running out of options where leash becomes the only viable way to go.0 -
Actually Adrian very few people posted examples of severely autistic kids. I think mine was the only one and that was long after multiple examples of amusement parks and crowded stores. I even stated that my oldest would ask for the leash because it was easier on him than holding my hand in a crowded place.
I still haven't heard any answer as to how putting a kid on a leash is lazy but putting them in a stroller or shopping buggy isn't.
You haven't heard me call it lazy either.
I never said you did. Although you did agree wth someone who did say it . My point wasn't that YOU haven't said how one is okay and the other isn't. It's that NO ONE from the "Leashes are bad m'kay" side will answer.0 -
I don't see them often, but when I do they are on small children. my little brother had one for a while, as I recall. (probably my fault, actually, as I wandered off as a kid. playing with a group of kids in a back yard, I decided to take a walk out the back gate. somehow made it across several big streets and 'the big ditch,' which was really more like a small creek used for drainage. some farmer and his wife found me in their field playing in the mud. I even got to ride home in a police car, I'm told.)
so, yeah, probably a little overboard by mom, who was still probably petrified she'd lose my brother -- I was curious, but he was just a running nut. he'd take off at any point just because he liked the chase. that happens, as said, in a busy place, and who knows what happens. so if a kid constantly shows that they can't be trusted to stick with you, it's a solution. and likely a temporary one, as the kid will either grow out of the running or just quit because he is tired of being leashed up.
I agree with bahet. there isn't an inherent need to teach kids anything in that situation. the need at that point in to keep your kid safe. and safety trumps looking stupid, frankly.1 -
I only take people who don't like children seriously if they are currently attempting to build a time machine so they can go back in time and abort themselves.
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I've always had mixed and lightly ambivalent feelings towards them. However, I saw one used while going through customs at the import tonight. Oh I would sayi understand why for his safety and peace of mind for everyone else. Even with the harness, he was running around, rolling around on the floor, accidentally hitting people, etc. They had another child the dad was carrying, but Too young to walk. The mom had her hands I'll trying to mange him. Some behavior motication might be helpful, but that situation and environment wasn't the place.0
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Next, I am hardly being self-righteous, I admitted in the very first post that my young sons can be more than a handful. I just said there is noway I am putting a frickin leash on my child and suggested an alternative like chasing children. Never once told anyone not to do it. And I'm not the type of person who would shoot people dirty looks if they did.
For people with multiple kids, if one kids runs what do you do with the others? Do you make them chase the other kid with you? Or make them stay put in one place and hope they are there when you come back from chasing down the other? It's easier if you have another adult with you but unfortunately that's not always possible. Yes, I agree that kids should be taught to stay with you and all of that but there are times where chasing down the runner is much easier said than done.
From my own experience, I had a leash as a kid. I don't even remember it. The only reason I know about it is because of the pictures from Disney World when I was 4 and I've got the harness part of it on (my mom detached the leash part so she could take a picture). There was no mental damage done because of the leash. Please someone show me 1 study that has been done that shows that kids suffer mental/emotional damage from being on a leash. I'd be willing to bet that most are like me and don't even remember it (unless it was one of the stuffed animal ones, that they may remember more as a toy).
As for strollers being lazy for the parents. I agree only if you think that parents should have to carry around their kid who is too tired to walk or force the kid to walk anyway. I've always seen the stroller as being more for the kid than the parent. Take them to the zoo or the mall and half way through (if that long) the kid is just plain too tired to walk anymore.1 -
Kids should be leashed. And whipped. Then again, so should adults.0
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I my days, if we ran off...we were 'corrected'. We did not need a leash. We also werent' diagnosed with ADHD/ADD/Autism ect just because we were rambunctious. If we got out of control, we were set straight. None of the "he/she can't help it because they've got some "disabilty" bs. BTW I have ADD/ADHD, and did just fine without meds growing up. It's called parents disciplining their child.0
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Oh yeah...i forgot about "autism". Another excuse for lack of parenting...0
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Oh yeah...i forgot about "autism". Another excuse for lack of parenting...
I would love it so very much if a group of autistic kids kicked your *kitten*.
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Honestly, I'm about to buy one for my two year old... why? Because she loves to run around the store. She is becoming more and more independant... and I don't care what people think of my parenting skills.
When my dad was stationed in Europe, we put my youngest brother on a leash... He doesn't even remember it, unless we tell him... Why was it done? Because most of the shopping malls were also major mass transportation hubs. Americans overseas, even in ally countries, aren't always safe... It would have been so flipping easy for someone to think "ooh! American kid, easy ransom money" and wisk him off to some other European Country as quick as lightning. Even here in the States, it can be super easy to kidnap kids (though statistically it's less likely as family members are more likely to kidnap children)...
Either way, a leash is a compromise for a fiercly independant kid and a parent that wants their kid to stay safe... at least in my opinion anyway. I want my toddler to learn to be independant... I just want a safety net around while she does so as well.1 -
Oh yeah...i forgot about "autism". Another excuse for lack of parenting...
Did you really make that comment?0 -
I HAD ONE FOR BOTH OF MINE.0
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Apparently, my parents had one for my older sister when she was little. It was used only in the barn, when my Mom was milking cows (by hand in those days) and my sister would not stay put. They were afraid she'd get hurt, and there were lots of places where that could happen in a barn, including large animals kicking, etc. My 86 year old mother still remembers some of her sister in laws being critical, but they did it anyway. Better safe than sorry.
On the other hand, I never needed one.:bigsmile: I think I learned a lot of what not to do from watching my older sis!1 -
I only take people who don't like children seriously if they are currently attempting to build a time machine so they can go back in time and abort themselves.
LMAO!!!! This is why I love coming here. My opinion, I don't use them. I have two boys who know to always stay by my side. If they want to see something, they will ask and 9 times out of ten, we go see. Are you lazy if you use one? No, I don't think so. Takes too much strength to deal with that. I will laugh at you though. Sorry. I also laugh at parents who keep their 4 year old in strollers that they don't fit in anymore. I understand there are those with medical needs as well as mental disabilities. So that doesn't pertain to them. Have a great weekend everyone.0 -
When I had a dog, I loved my dog. He loved running free, but when we were walking in town, I put him on a lead. I knew that, no matter how perfect I would like to think I was, if I made a mistake and he ran into the road or saw something really interesting, I would never forgive myself if he ended up squashed into the Tarmac.
I love my children more than I ever loved that dog.
So, the child who loved to run free and tended to throw herself down on the ground if she didn't want to do something had a harness. If she decided to drop in the middle of the road, I could catch her by the back of the harness and carry her like a rather grumpy handbag and get her to safety without having to abandon the dog or the other children I was also responsible for in the middle of the road. I'm not an Olympic sprinter, I'm not Schrondingers cat, so can't be in two places at once, so I make no apologies for keeping the most precious things in my life safe.
Kids in harnesses or kids in coffins - I know which one I prefer.1
