I confess- Single Peeps version
Replies
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Following Carnegie's book, How to Lose Friends and Alienate People, I'd say that if you feel that strongly about it, you'd probably be doing BB a favor by ending things. It is unreasonable to hold him accountable for your feelings or the actions of other people. You seem to be doing both. If those really are the standards of your expectations, he can never live up to them no matter how hard he tries and is bound to be miserable attempting to do so.
Where did this come from? Are you having girl trouble or something?
All I'm asking him to do is acknowledge my feelings, which is entirely reasonable. An interesting series of events has begun opening their eyes though: things like the waitress taking everyone else's orders and walking away without taking mine. Also, step-mom is irritated I went to the Davis house because apparently the tour guide let slip that he tempered his presentation for my sake. Step-moms cousin won't even get in the car with me, made comment that the best day of the trip was when i got sick and they didnt have to drag me along. Thankfully, the kids don't like step-mom (dont consider her or cousin part of the family) so I'm not losing any sleep over her or cousins reactions.0 -
This is one of those times I wish I could just pretend I was Latina like other girls do. Life is so much easier that way. And, honestly, its been rumored that my dad was half PR but no one knows. Or just said "I'm Italian," which is my moms heritage.
I just feel that would be dishonest.0 -
Happy National Slurpie day its 7/11's 40th annivesry of the slurpie adn they are celebrating by giving out free slurpies -12 ouncees
Awesome!!0 -
thanks! yeah there were 19 of us i think
yoovie
brettpgh
dontstop_beleakin
capt apollo
scs143
desterknee
krys140
elemenopee
skittybang
whothehellisben
skullshank
escloflowne
gorillanj
carl01
windy
nerdyrose
zombiechaser
and like 4-8 more people.
Like a fahkin Boss!!0 -
I confess I awkwardly asked a guy to check my squat form (just learned on Tuesday) and was then told by a pretty hot guy that I'm a natural tee hee0
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Following Carnegie's book, How to Lose Friends and Alienate People, I'd say that if you feel that strongly about it, you'd probably be doing BB a favor by ending things. It is unreasonable to hold him accountable for your feelings or the actions of other people. You seem to be doing both. If those really are the standards of your expectations, he can never live up to them no matter how hard he tries and is bound to be miserable attempting to do so.
Where did this come from? Are you having girl trouble or something?
All I'm asking him to do is acknowledge my feelings, which is entirely reasonable. An interesting series of events has begun opening their eyes though: things like the waitress taking everyone else's orders and walking away without taking mine. Also, step-mom is irritated I went to the Davis house because apparently the tour guide let slip that he tempered his presentation for my sake. Step-moms cousin won't even get in the car with me, made comment that the best day of the trip was when i got sick and they didnt have to drag me along. Thankfully, the kids don't like step-mom (dont consider her or cousin part of the family) so I'm not losing any sleep over her or cousins reactions.
JJ, you know I love you right? Step back and look at things from outside of your box. Put those psych skills to work for a minute.
DB has a point that you're not seeing. All we hear about BB is when you have reservations, when things aren't looking so good for one reason or another, when something goes wrong. You don't come in excited about when things go right near as often as you come in to vent about something minor, something that is just a little off key. From what this forum sees of your relationship seems as if you're looking for reasons to leave, but you haven't accepted that yet.
We don't see the whole picture, we don't know the full reality of the situation. However... you can't blame the man for judging the situation by what you present to us.
ETA: You're right, your feelings do deserve consideration. However, yours aren't the ONLY feelings that matter. How many people went on this 'vacation'? That's how many individual sets of feelings need to be considered. Welcome to being part of a big family...0 -
You're right...I rarely come in here talking about the good. I'm usually off the forums when e erything is going well.
I generally comebjn here when things bother me to see if its just me or if those things bother others or if im being unreasonable. I do t want to them around in 10 years regretting being single over something I later realize doesn't matter. He is a great guy with a good heart who isnt bothered by my peculiarities and that's tough to find.
That said, I find people are quick to criticise me over stuff (like bad teeth) when they would move on for lesser infractions.
I'm not "looking for reasons to end it" per se...I have lots of reasons. What I'm more looking for is that, in light of these many little things, reassurance that I'm not stupid to stay.
So many people write if s/he weren't xyz perfectness they'd leave but they're single, bitter, or pining away for someone who doesn't want them (or really doesn't exist). I'm trying to make sure I won't end up in that category.
And I'm also trying to make sure I don't end up in the category of folks who are miserable later and wish they had heeded the earlier warning signs.
Thanks for your opinions everyone. I'll think about what uoi all wrote.0 -
You're right...I rarely come in here talking about the good. I'm usually off the forums when e erything is going well.
I generally comebjn here when things bother me to see if its just me or if those things bother others or if im being unreasonable. I do t want to them around in 10 years regretting being single over something I later realize doesn't matter. He is a great guy with a good heart who isnt bothered by my peculiarities and that's tough to find.
That said, I find people are quick to criticise me over stuff (like bad teeth) when they would move on for lesser infractions.
I'm not "looking for reasons to end it" per se...I have lots of reasons. What I'm more looking for is that, in light of these many little things, reassurance that I'm not stupid to stay.
So many people write if s/he weren't xyz perfectness they'd leave but they're single, bitter, or pining away for someone who doesn't want them (or really doesn't exist). I'm trying to make sure I won't end up in that category.
And I'm also trying to make sure I don't end up in the category of folks who are miserable later and wish they had heeded the earlier warning signs.
Thanks for your opinions everyone. I'll think about what uoi all wrote.
What I'm seeing in your message, and what I know I'm worried about for you (and maybe others are too), is that you're with BB because you're afraid of being alone again. I know a lot of good-hearted sweet men, but I know none that would work out for me relationship wise, for a variety of reasons. I'm of the type where, if it doesn't 'feel right' I'll move on to find something that does. "He's a good guy" is not a good enough reason to stay, in my book. However, your reasons are your own.
It doesn't matter what's important to us... what is important to YOU? Good teeth is important to you, but it's not to me. The guy I end up with has to be a dog-friendly person; you may prefer cats. We all have different priorities and preferences in relationships. If we didn't life would be incredibly boring, and everyone would be assembly line cookie cutter replicas of each other.
I'll admit I'm one of the bitter ones right now... but that's a stage of my personal healing process. We're all different, we process things differently, and your mileage WILL vary from mine. It's not better or worse, just different... and that's okay. Sometimes I think this place is the blind leading the blind, but I think we are all trying to look out for each other's best interests.0 -
I guess to me its the opposite problem...so many of the BIG things are right with him I'm scares I should be paying more attention to the little things.
For example, I came back from deployment 2 months before my move to DC (next week). I needed a place to stay and with all the military summer moves rentals were hard to find and rents were high so he worked out with his landlord for me to stay in the unit next door that never stays rented. I suppose its the closest I would ever get to living with someone lol.
It was really nice him knocking on my door for an "off to work kiss" cooking together, running together etc, and I could totally see us happy together. But I'm so scared to death that I am missing something like I did with my ex. He's met a lot of my friends and mentors. The ones back east think I can "do better" but the ones that are more home-folk seem to really like him, think he's perfect for me, and think I'm letting fear turn molehills into mountains.
It's a long drive home from vacation, so we'll see what conversation ensues.0 -
I confess I love Cesar's new profile pic0
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I confess I love Cesar's new profile pic
I like it too. Mainly because of who was with me in said pic.0 -
I confess I love Cesar's new profile pic
I like it too. Mainly because of who was with me in said pic.
OMG! YOu two look GREAT together :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: Gorgeous smiles!!! :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile:0 -
I confess I am probably going to get a membership to the Y just because it is located in the office building I work for and I need a place to take a shower on the weekends when I am playing sports so I don't have to drive the 40 mins home. I hate that they are so expensive for single people.0
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I confess I love Cesar's new profile pic
I like it too. Mainly because of who was with me in said pic.
OMG! YOu two look GREAT together :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile: Gorgeous smiles!!! :bigsmile: :bigsmile: :bigsmile:
So cute together!!!!!0 -
I confess I been worn out from the past 2 days. Yesterday, when Kits and I hung out, it was a very hot and sticky time. It's been a while for me, so it took some time getting used to it again. Kits was a trooper as she was patient with me, taking breaks as needed. We continued the following morning where we both expended so much energy, we could barely move after we finished, but it was worth every second.0
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I confess I been worn out from the past 2 days. Yesterday, when Kits and I hung out, it was a very hot and sticky time. It's been a while for me, so it took some time getting used to it again. Kits was a trooper as she was patient with me, taking breaks as needed. We continued the following morning where we both expended so much energy, we could barely move after we finished, but it was worth every second.
:drinker: :blushing:0 -
I confess I been worn out from the past 2 days. Yesterday, when Kits and I hung out, it was a very hot and sticky time. It's been a while for me, so it took some time getting used to it again. Kits was a trooper as she was patient with me, taking breaks as needed. We continued the following morning where we both expended so much energy, we could barely move after we finished, but it was worth every second.
:laugh: :laugh: of course everyone's brain is working overtime now!!
Keep at it you two, I'm sure you'll get used to 'it'!! :laugh:0 -
I confess I been worn out from the past 2 days. Yesterday, when Kits and I hung out, it was a very hot and sticky time. It's been a while for me, so it took some time getting used to it again. Kits was a trooper as she was patient with me, taking breaks as needed. We continued the following morning where we both expended so much energy, we could barely move after we finished, but it was worth every second.
:laugh: :laugh: of course everyone's brain is working overtime now!!
Keep at it you two, I'm sure you'll get used to 'it'!! :laugh:
Ooooooh now that sounds fun!!! :bigsmile:0 -
I confess that I met someone from here last week and it was fun.0
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I confess that I met someone from here last week and it was fun.
who? who? who? Names and Pictures or it didnt happen!! :bigsmile:0