Uncommon deal breakers
Replies
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I was at a fitness class a couple of weeks ago, started a conversation with a woman and I was asking open ended questions and getting 1-4 word responses. That was adolescent, high school behavior to the extreme and she was probably 23-26. Too old to pull that sort of nonsense.
You either have such a massive ego you can't comprehend that she couldn't possibly be into you, or you have such terrible social awareness that you didn't comprehend she wanted you to go away and leave her alone.
It's not games to not be into a guy. I know you have all the answers in your worldview but DM, seriously? Seriously. Don't be that creeper.
I did go away after about 2-3 questions of that bull****. I got the point. My social awareness was there. My point was that the bull**** should not have happened to begin with.
WHAT bullsh*t exactly? I don't understand why not wanting to talk to someone and giving them short, clipped responses as an indicator gets you all up in arms about how juvenile she is. What exactly should she have done in your perfect world?
Just said right away I'm not interested and left. If a girl approaches me, and I'm not interested, I say right away that I am not interested.
Also Kits, your 'tude is abysmal and your responses are rather condescending.
DM, I don't get this either. I'm not saying this is fact, but IF she were creeped out by you for example, you'd rather hear her say those specific words to your face than just find a way to back out of the conversation with short responses? I don't think it's less rude (but that's debatable) and could possibly make things awkward and seem threatening to her...sometimes it's also important to put yourself in someone else's shoes is my biggest point here.0 -
I was at a fitness class a couple of weeks ago, started a conversation with a woman and I was asking open ended questions and getting 1-4 word responses. That was adolescent, high school behavior to the extreme and she was probably 23-26. Too old to pull that sort of nonsense.
You either have such a massive ego you can't comprehend that she couldn't possibly be into you, or you have such terrible social awareness that you didn't comprehend she wanted you to go away and leave her alone.
It's not games to not be into a guy. I know you have all the answers in your worldview but DM, seriously? Seriously. Don't be that creeper.
I did go away after about 2-3 questions of that bull****. I got the point. My social awareness was there. My point was that the bull**** should not have happened to begin with.
WHAT bullsh*t exactly? I don't understand why not wanting to talk to someone and giving them short, clipped responses as an indicator gets you all up in arms about how juvenile she is. What exactly should she have done in your perfect world?
Just said right away I'm not interested and left. If a girl approaches me, and I'm not interested, I say right away that I am not interested.
Also Kits, your 'tude is abysmal and your responses are rather condescending.
I'm sorry but that is ridiculous. The basic premise of most sales is that people are not confrontational. Most people will not be as direct as you expect. Do you really think it is a better attitude to say "Do you really think I'd be interested in you? How cute. Now go away little fella!" I am sure most people who avoid being direct perceive that that is exactly how they come across.
What he said. It is not her duty to police you and your preferred interactions. She wasn't being rude in the least, and even less true was your accusation that she was "playing games".
It's awful rich of you to accuse me of having an abysmal "'tude" when you're the one parading around here calling women 25+ old, then accusing younger women of being juvenile for acting like normal human beings functioning in a perfectly socially acceptable way. So yeah, I am being condescending because your *kitten* stinks, despite your beliefs otherwise, and you're spreading it all over where we have to smell it too. How's that for direct?0 -
Men who don't like watching sports on TV -- or a sport. Any sport. Yes, there are men out there who don't like watching sports. And in my experience, they are strange across the board. I avoid them now.
I also strongly prefer a man over 6'0". I've dated shorter guys...but...didn't like it that much.
My list of deal breakers has gotten much shorter as I've gotten older. I can't believe some of the stupid things that used to be on my list when I was in my 20s. Now I could really care less how a guy dresses as long as he is a good person and we have fun together.
I'll watch sports on TV if others are or when at a bar but for the most part I couldn't give a crap about sports. I will watch Devils hockey if they're in the playoffs though or go to a game or two during the season. Otherwise I don't go outta my way to watch a football game. Last girl I dated loved the Eagles, i only watched to make her happy.
Not sure why you consider a non sports watching guy strange across the board...what does that even mean? Strange how? CUz they don't like watching sports? lol.
Something about guys that do not watch or follow a sport is strange and to me is along the lines of guys that don't have guy friends. I can't put my finger on it exactly but they come across as too feminine to me.0 -
My deal breakers have definitely changed as I've aged (and after my divorce)
• must be at least open to discussing sexual options/toys/positions/etc... we can negotiate where we both are satisfied but no more
prudes for me… and must be willing to let me be in control at least occasionally
• must be able to support himself comfortably - I was a sugar mama to my ex and never going there again
• I don't care about level of education but must be intelligent enough to have a conversation at my level regularly
• If he's shorter than 5'10” then he has to be comfortable with the fact that I wear 5 inch heels often so we'll either be the same
height or I'll be taller (I'm 5'4")
• Must be fit/healthy… not looking for ripped but I’ve worked hard to get myself in shape so I want to date someone who feels the
same0 -
I was at a fitness class a couple of weeks ago, started a conversation with a woman and I was asking open ended questions and getting 1-4 word responses. That was adolescent, high school behavior to the extreme and she was probably 23-26. Too old to pull that sort of nonsense.
You either have such a massive ego you can't comprehend that she couldn't possibly be into you, or you have such terrible social awareness that you didn't comprehend she wanted you to go away and leave her alone.
It's not games to not be into a guy. I know you have all the answers in your worldview but DM, seriously? Seriously. Don't be that creeper.
I did go away after about 2-3 questions of that bull****. I got the point. My social awareness was there. My point was that the bull**** should not have happened to begin with.
WHAT bullsh*t exactly? I don't understand why not wanting to talk to someone and giving them short, clipped responses as an indicator gets you all up in arms about how juvenile she is. What exactly should she have done in your perfect world?
Just said right away I'm not interested and left. If a girl approaches me, and I'm not interested, I say right away that I am not interested.
Also Kits, your 'tude is abysmal and your responses are rather condescending.
DM, I don't get this either. I'm not saying this is fact, but IF she were creeped out by you for example, you'd rather hear her say those specific words to your face than just find a way to back out of the conversation with short responses? I don't think it's less rude (but that's debatable) and could possibly make things awkward and seem threatening to her...sometimes it's also important to put yourself in someone else's shoes is my biggest point here.
I don't think what she did was even close to rude. I think it's a lot more rude to simply assume someone is hitting on you just because they are making small talk, and then quickly shut them down. It was an awkward situation and she handled it just fine. Saying "I'm sorry, I'm not interested" opens up the situation to defensiveness and even confrontation. She probably has enough on her plate without worrying about some strangers feelings.0 -
Something about guys that do not watch or follow a sport is strange and to me is along the lines of guys that don't have guy friends. I can't put my finger on it exactly but they come across as too feminine to me.
Interesting...i'm more interested in movies, music and video games than sports so I'll do those things. Me and a bunch of buds like to play on Xbox Live.
When I was on a dating site back in the day and I saw that a woman was a huge sports nut i didn't even bother with her.0 -
My deal breakers have definitely changed as I've aged (and after my divorce)
• must be at least open to discussing sexual options/toys/positions/etc... we can negotiate where we both are satisfied but no more
prudes for me… and must be willing to let me be in control at least occasionally
• must be able to support himself comfortably - I was a sugar mama to my ex and never going there again
• I don't care about level of education but must be intelligent enough to have a conversation at my level regularly
• If he's shorter than 5'10” then he has to be comfortable with the fact that I wear 5 inch heels often so we'll either be the same
height or I'll be taller (I'm 5'4")
• Must be fit/healthy… not looking for ripped but I’ve worked hard to get myself in shape so I want to date someone who feels the
same
Lol, none of these are uncommon dealbreakers
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Lol, none of these are uncommon dealbreakers
You're not that far from me... men looking for a sugar mama in LA are very common... the whole cougar phenomenon is alive and kicking here!
The control aspect is one I also have issues with. I'm more dominant than submissive so that turns a lot of guys off.0 -
I was at a fitness class a couple of weeks ago, started a conversation with a woman and I was asking open ended questions and getting 1-4 word responses. That was adolescent, high school behavior to the extreme and she was probably 23-26. Too old to pull that sort of nonsense.
You either have such a massive ego you can't comprehend that she couldn't possibly be into you, or you have such terrible social awareness that you didn't comprehend she wanted you to go away and leave her alone.
It's not games to not be into a guy. I know you have all the answers in your worldview but DM, seriously? Seriously. Don't be that creeper.
I did go away after about 2-3 questions of that bull****. I got the point. My social awareness was there. My point was that the bull**** should not have happened to begin with.
WHAT bullsh*t exactly? I don't understand why not wanting to talk to someone and giving them short, clipped responses as an indicator gets you all up in arms about how juvenile she is. What exactly should she have done in your perfect world?
Just said right away I'm not interested and left. If a girl approaches me, and I'm not interested, I say right away that I am not interested.
Also Kits, your 'tude is abysmal and your responses are rather condescending.
DM, I don't get this either. I'm not saying this is fact, but IF she were creeped out by you for example, you'd rather hear her say those specific words to your face than just find a way to back out of the conversation with short responses? I don't think it's less rude (but that's debatable) and could possibly make things awkward and seem threatening to her...sometimes it's also important to put yourself in someone else's shoes is my biggest point here.
I don't think what she did was even close to rude. I think it's a lot more rude to simply assume someone is hitting on you just because they are making small talk, and then quickly shut them down. It was an awkward situation and she handled it just fine. Saying "I'm sorry, I'm not interested" opens up the situation to defensiveness and even confrontation. She probably has enough on her plate without worrying about some strangers feelings.
Kits, That was exactly my point, I don't think the less rude response is to say something. And depending on place and time, physical safety is also an issue if she perceived the guy being weird...*
*NOT saying DM was being weird or creepy, but you never know how you are being perceived is my point! She only had to worry about herself in that case, not a stranger.0 -
A weird deal-breaker for me is unnatural eyebrows. As in, so pencil thin you can barely see them. Or drawn on altogether. It never looks good to me.
Obviously I think plucking and shaping is fine, but there has to be a resemblance of a normal human there.
Example:
http://media-cache6.pinterest.com/upload/194780752603882400_2XDMmO0W_b.jpg
Gross.0 -
I agree with the boy shorts for swim trunks hate speedo's.
Also unless you are an actual cow boy no cow boy boots.
Girlie high pitched voice.
And a man who takes longer to get ready than I do..nope no way.0 -
oh, i thought of one....doesn't give oral.
wait there are honestly women who don't... I'm so sorry. Personally I think its fun :bigsmile:
And yeah, I want to add the no oral/not finishing oral to a dealbreaker as well. Been there, done that and it was not fun. Always had to finish myself b/c she didn't want to get anything on/in her.
...of course right before we broke up, I happened to forget to mention I was close. This was her dealbreaker.0 -
And yeah, I want to add the no oral/not finishing oral to a dealbreaker as well. Been there, done that and it was not fun. Always had to finish myself b/c she didn't want to get anything on/in her.
...of course right before we broke up, I happened to forget to mention I was close. This was her dealbreaker.
haha.."oops, my bad...cya"0 -
So .. do you care what she does with it after you finish?0
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Heavy perfume wearer. I like needing to be close to a woman to be able to smell it. Not 15 feet away.
Reality TV junkie. Her DVR is filled with nothing but. In my experience it just translates to being a couch potato. I don't want to date someone who is a couch potato.
Starbucks fanatic. I love the NBA and after the CEO sold the Seattle Sonics to Clay Bennett, I boycott them for life. I don't care if she likes Starbucks. Many women do. It's when that's all she likes and tries to "change me" to get me to like it with her. No.0 -
Something about guys that do not watch or follow a sport is strange and to me is along the lines of guys that don't have guy friends. I can't put my finger on it exactly but they come across as too feminine to me.
Interesting...i'm more interested in movies, music and video games than sports so I'll do those things. Me and a bunch of buds like to play on Xbox Live.
When I was on a dating site back in the day and I saw that a woman was a huge sports nut i didn't even bother with her.
A deal breaker for me would be a guy that plays xbox on a daily bases and is over 33.0 -
A weird deal-breaker for me is unnatural eyebrows. As in, so pencil thin you can barely see them. Or drawn on altogether. It never looks good to me.
Obviously I think plucking and shaping is fine, but there has to be a resemblance of a normal human there.
Example:
Gross.
fixed it and Hello there. Of course your from MN but too young.0 -
Heavy perfume wearer. I like needing to be close to a woman to be able to smell it. Not 15 feet away.
I have bacon perfume. I save it for promising first dates, and use it sparingly.0 -
A deal breaker for me would be a guy that plays xbox on a daily bases and is over 33.
40 and on a Friday or Saturday night with friends. If a woman can't handle that about me, they can GFT.0 -
Heavy perfume wearer. I like needing to be close to a woman to be able to smell it. Not 15 feet away.
Reality TV junkie. Her DVR is filled with nothing but. In my experience it just translates to being a couch potato. I don't want to date someone who is a couch potato.
Starbucks fanatic. I love the NBA and after the CEO sold the Seattle Sonics to Clay Bennett, I boycott them for life. I don't care if she likes Starbucks. Many women do. It's when that's all she likes and tries to "change me" to get me to like it with her. No.
I am sensitive to perfume so can't wear it usually. Have some reality but not that much and not a junkie. I don't like coffee, will get some of their other stuff but don't make out of the way trips there. I prefer local coffee shops.0 -
A deal breaker for me would be a guy that plays xbox on a daily bases and is over 33.
40 and on a Friday or Saturday night with friends. If a woman can't handle that about me, they can GFT.
BYE BYE see ya don't let the door hit you where the good lord split ya. This also goes along with guys that stay in too much. Friday and Saturday nights are supposed to be for going out not staying in.0 -
I agree with the boy shorts for swim trunks hate speedo's.
Also unless you are an actual cow boy no cow boy boots.
Girlie high pitched voice.
And a man who takes longer to get ready than I do..nope no way.
I agree with these, except the cowboy boots. The bf is the first man I've dated that wears them and they look good.0 -
A deal breaker for me would be a guy that plays xbox on a daily bases and is over 33.
40 and on a Friday or Saturday night with friends. If a woman can't handle that about me, they can GFT.
BYE BYE see ya don't let the door hit you where the good lord split ya. This also goes along with guys that stay in too much. Friday and Saturday nights are supposed to be for going out not staying in.
BYE BYE would gladly leave...to go home and play BlackOps with friends than deal with a woman that couldn't take a once a week thing between friends.
Being single, i don't feel the need to go out every single weekend and rather spend a Saturday night home, drinking and playing with friends on XBL. Age has nothing to do with playing games either.0 -
A deal breaker for me would be a guy that plays xbox on a daily bases and is over 33.
40 and on a Friday or Saturday night with friends. If a woman can't handle that about me, they can GFT.
BYE BYE see ya don't let the door hit you where the good lord split ya. This also goes along with guys that stay in too much. Friday and Saturday nights are supposed to be for going out not staying in.
BYE BYE would gladly leave...to go home and play BlackOps with friends than deal with a woman that couldn't take a once a week thing between friends.
Being single, i don't feel the need to go out every single weekend and rather spend a Saturday night home, drinking and playing with friends on XBL. Age has nothing to do with playing games either.
wow i sound like a huge nerd.0 -
Heavy perfume wearer. I like needing to be close to a woman to be able to smell it. Not 15 feet away.
Agree with this. Guess i didn't think of it as uncommon. But I get horrible headaches from most perfumes/colognes. Even scented candles burning all the time do it. One girlfriend took me into a bath and body works...I about threw up in the store. I needed fresh air.0 -
A deal breaker for me would be a guy that plays xbox on a daily bases and is over 33.
40 and on a Friday or Saturday night with friends. If a woman can't handle that about me, they can GFT.
BYE BYE see ya don't let the door hit you where the good lord split ya. This also goes along with guys that stay in too much. Friday and Saturday nights are supposed to be for going out not staying in.
BYE BYE would gladly leave...to go home and play BlackOps with friends than deal with a woman that couldn't take a once a week thing between friends.
Being single, i don't feel the need to go out every single weekend and rather spend a Saturday night home, drinking and playing with friends on XBL. Age has nothing to do with playing games either.
wow i sound like a huge nerd.
I don't think black ops is nerdy. It's downright trendy!
This is also coming from the girl who just got back from vacation after spending most of it watching Adventure Time, Digimon, MLP, planning cosplays, bought several action figures and was stoked to get GL Emerald Dawn comics for Christmas...0 -
A deal breaker for me would be a guy that plays xbox on a daily bases and is over 33.
40 and on a Friday or Saturday night with friends. If a woman can't handle that about me, they can GFT.
BYE BYE see ya don't let the door hit you where the good lord split ya. This also goes along with guys that stay in too much. Friday and Saturday nights are supposed to be for going out not staying in.
BYE BYE would gladly leave...to go home and play BlackOps with friends than deal with a woman that couldn't take a once a week thing between friends.
Being single, i don't feel the need to go out every single weekend and rather spend a Saturday night home, drinking and playing with friends on XBL. Age has nothing to do with playing games either.
I am sure there are plenty of women out there that wouldn't mind you playing it just not me. Just like you wouldn't have looked twice at me since I am a sport nut. I can talk about almost any sport and I play flag football, softball, and kick ball in leagues and other sports in pick up games.0 -
I am sure there are plenty of women out there that wouldn't mind you playing it just not me. Just like you wouldn't have looked twice at me since I am a sport nut. I can talk about almost any sport and I play flag football, softball, and kick ball in leagues and other sports in pick up games.
true true..to each their own.0 -
I suck @ Black Ops. :-( When I did gaming in the past, I was always like the fat kid, chosen last cuz since I suck.
A deal breaker for me would be a guy that plays xbox on a daily bases and is over 33.
40 and on a Friday or Saturday night with friends. If a woman can't handle that about me, they can GFT.
BYE BYE see ya don't let the door hit you where the good lord split ya. This also goes along with guys that stay in too much. Friday and Saturday nights are supposed to be for going out not staying in.
BYE BYE would gladly leave...to go home and play BlackOps with friends than deal with a woman that couldn't take a once a week thing between friends.
Being single, i don't feel the need to go out every single weekend and rather spend a Saturday night home, drinking and playing with friends on XBL. Age has nothing to do with playing games either.
wow i sound like a huge nerd.
I don't think black ops is nerdy. It's downright trendy!
This is also coming from the girl who just got back from vacation after spending most of it watching Adventure Time, Digimon, MLP, planning cosplays, bought several action figures and was stoked to get GL Emerald Dawn comics for Christmas...0 -
So .. do you care what she does with it after you finish?
Hello? Guys!? We are waiting...0
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