First Date Rules
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Also, I don't speak for all men, but if I invite someone back to my house, it isn't necessarily so I can get in their pants. It is usually to chill, watch a movie, maybe have a drink, dazzle them with my cooking skills, or just talk in a place I feel comfortable.0
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I dunno why you think we are all morally bankrupt *kitten* who put out on the first date and accuse everyone who doesnt of sabotaging themselves, missing out on life and being too restricting. It's not all about sex and morals ffs, sometimes we really are just talking about basketball, MMA and pedicures.
LOL ....
I was never saying that christine had to loosen up her morality or her lack of sex.. Thats her buisness. What I was saying is that because I broke basically every rule that some of the laides laid out here I went out last night and had fun.....I'm just saying if she concentrated a little less on the rules she might discover more things and have more fun .. It literally had nothing to do with sex lol
Oh and for a hoebag Im really running a dry streak lol
I didnt mean you babe
I totally agree with you about looking at each circumstance instead of only reacting positively to situations that fit inside your rigid rules from the very beginning.
lol I know you didn't.. I feel like she meant us though so I was adding to your responce0 -
Also, I don't speak for all men, but if I invite someone back to my house, it isn't necessarily so I can get in their pants. It is usually to chill, watch a movie, maybe have a drink, dazzle them with my cooking skills, or just talk in a place I feel comfortable.
this is 90% of the case I have experienced. Everyone's broke, we want to shine and how off our best for someone we really like. Let's be comfortable and talk all evening and play video games and go for a walk with your dog.0 -
I dunno why you think we are all morally bankrupt *kitten* who put out on the first date and accuse everyone who doesnt of sabotaging themselves, missing out on life and being too restricting. It's not all about sex and morals ffs, sometimes we really are just talking about basketball, MMA and pedicures.
LOL ....
I was never saying that christine had to loosen up her morality or her lack of sex.. Thats her buisness. What I was saying is that because I broke basically every rule that some of the laides laid out here I went out last night and had fun.....I'm just saying if she concentrated a little less on the rules she might discover more things and have more fun .. It literally had nothing to do with sex lol
Oh and for a hoebag Im really running a dry streak lol
I didnt mean you babe I totally agree with you about looking at each circumstance instead of only reacting positively to situations that fit inside your rigid rules from the very beginning.
lol I know you didn't.. I feel like she meant us though so I was adding to your responce
gotcha gotcha!
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As someone who is sexually conservative and inexperience, I don't think going to a man's house is off limits. I never had sex before, but the first guy I dated he invited me back to his place after we went to a coffee shop together. We talked for a few hours and learned a lot about each other. Hell, even the second time I went to his place and we talked for hours. If my intuition was wary of him, I would have never went to his house obviously. Heck, I thought we connected more during those times than we were actually out together.Obviously we are not together, but I don't think it had anything to do with the dating process at all.0
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Also, I don't speak for all men, but if I invite someone back to my house, it isn't necessarily so I can get in their pants. It is usually to chill, watch a movie, maybe have a drink, dazzle them with my cooking skills, or just talk in a place I feel comfortable.
this is 90% of the case I have experienced. Everyone's broke, we want to shine and how off our best for someone we really like. Let's be comfortable and talk all evening and play video games and go for a walk with your dog.
And that is what I would consider an awesome evening. Stripping away the pretentiousness of most first dates while comfortable, having fun and a little playful trash talking, some silliness, and a relaxing walk. I say that is an awesome way to get to know someone.0 -
Also, I don't speak for all men, but if I invite someone back to my house, it isn't necessarily so I can get in their pants. It is usually to chill, watch a movie, maybe have a drink, dazzle them with my cooking skills, or just talk in a place I feel comfortable.
this is 90% of the case I have experienced. Everyone's broke, we want to shine and how off our best for someone we really like. Let's be comfortable and talk all evening and play video games and go for a walk with your dog.
And that is what I would consider an awesome evening. Stripping away the pretentiousness of most first dates while comfortable, having fun and a little playful trash talking, some silliness, and a relaxing walk. I say that is an awesome way to get to know someone.
I've spent more time just going to someone house and hanging out ,playing videos games and marathoning T.V. shows then I can count.... You can learn alot about someone while they are in their house. People are much more themselves at home0 -
Agreed, I dont understand why 'hanging out at a guy's house' is so deplorable. Poor guys. Yall are not all sexually irresponsible violent predators out to damage our morals. Pretty sure yall are just really happy when a pretty girl that you really like wants to hang out with you just as much as you wanna hang out with her.
being able to get to know someone without stooping so low as to hang out with a man at his home, does not make anyone better or worse than anyone else.
BUT if you are the kind of person that doesnt want to get sexually involved with someone too soon and you know you cannot control your own impulses, or you dont have the self-control to say no if you are alone with him in his home, then by all means, scratch it off the list and dont put yourself in a situation where you'll drop panties faster than you would preder.0 -
prefer*0
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Also, I don't speak for all men, but if I invite someone back to my house, it isn't necessarily so I can get in their pants. It is usually to chill, watch a movie, maybe have a drink, dazzle them with my cooking skills, or just talk in a place I feel comfortable.
this is 90% of the case I have experienced. Everyone's broke, we want to shine and how off our best for someone we really like. Let's be comfortable and talk all evening and play video games and go for a walk with your dog.
And that is what I would consider an awesome evening. Stripping away the pretentiousness of most first dates while comfortable, having fun and a little playful trash talking, some silliness, and a relaxing walk. I say that is an awesome way to get to know someone.
I've spent more time just going to someone house and hanging out ,playing videos games and marathoning T.V. shows then I can count.... You can learn alot about someone while they are in their house. People are much more themselves at home
plus you can see his style! his housekeeping skills! his movie and game collection! His cooking skills! his roommates or his dogs! how he is when he is relaxed and not under pressure to put on an awesome date in a room full of overdressed people!0 -
I think the "go to a guys house on the first date" thing was more in reference to online dating when you haven't even met the guy yet. I too do not like the first MEETING to be at his house. But if we grab a coffee and don't want to end it then yeah, go from there IMO. This has more to do with having an escape route if there's no connection more than anything.0
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You guys are missing the point of what I wrote. You’re also contradicting stuff that you’ve written about elsewhere. I confess that while I don’t care about everyone reading this, I’m especially sad about those I consider friends.
I think sometimes people reading "they're judging me" into everything is more often reflective of them not being 100% comfortable with their lifestyle and decisions as they probably should be. Or jealous. Or whatever. When we're happy with our lives, we don't need to get all defensive and angry about someone with a different lifestyle. What works for them works for them, just like what works for us works for us.0 -
Also, I don't speak for all men, but if I invite someone back to my house, it isn't necessarily so I can get in their pants. It is usually to chill, watch a movie, maybe have a drink, dazzle them with my cooking skills, or just talk in a place I feel comfortable.
this is 90% of the case I have experienced. Everyone's broke, we want to shine and how off our best for someone we really like. Let's be comfortable and talk all evening and play video games and go for a walk with your dog.
And that is what I would consider an awesome evening. Stripping away the pretentiousness of most first dates while comfortable, having fun and a little playful trash talking, some silliness, and a relaxing walk. I say that is an awesome way to get to know someone.
I've spent more time just going to someone house and hanging out ,playing videos games and marathoning T.V. shows then I can count.... You can learn alot about someone while they are in their house. People are much more themselves at home
plus you can see his style! his housekeeping skills! his movie and game collection! His cooking skills! his roommates or his dogs! how he is when he is relaxed and not under pressure to put on an awesome date in a room full of overdressed people!
A girl ia going to be disappointed in my decor. I have no style, I am a bit spartonian in my decor, but my housekeeping and cooking skills are awesome! And I have two cats. :grumble:0 -
You guys are missing the point of what I wrote. You’re also contradicting stuff that you’ve written about elsewhere. I confess that while I don’t care about everyone reading this, I’m especially sad about those I consider friends.
I think sometimes people reading "they're judging me" into everything is more often reflective of them not being 100% comfortable with their lifestyle and decisions as they probably should be. Or jealous. Or whatever. When we're happy with our lives, we don't need to get all defensive and angry about someone with a different lifestyle. What works for them works for them, just like what works for us works for us.
In for jealousy!0 -
I think the "go to a guys house on the first date" thing was more in reference to online dating when you haven't even met the guy yet. I too do not like the first MEETING to be at his house. But if we grab a coffee and don't want to end it then yeah, go from there IMO. This has more to do with having an escape route if there's no connection more than anything.
one girl wrote she wouldnt ever go to a guys house for a date.. Thats what we were referring to.. Meeting someone for the first time would hopefully be done in public0 -
Also, I don't speak for all men, but if I invite someone back to my house, it isn't necessarily so I can get in their pants. It is usually to chill, watch a movie, maybe have a drink, dazzle them with my cooking skills, or just talk in a place I feel comfortable.
this is 90% of the case I have experienced. Everyone's broke, we want to shine and how off our best for someone we really like. Let's be comfortable and talk all evening and play video games and go for a walk with your dog.
And that is what I would consider an awesome evening. Stripping away the pretentiousness of most first dates while comfortable, having fun and a little playful trash talking, some silliness, and a relaxing walk. I say that is an awesome way to get to know someone.
I've spent more time just going to someone house and hanging out ,playing videos games and marathoning T.V. shows then I can count.... You can learn alot about someone while they are in their house. People are much more themselves at home
plus you can see his style! his housekeeping skills! his movie and game collection! His cooking skills! his roommates or his dogs! how he is when he is relaxed and not under pressure to put on an awesome date in a room full of overdressed people!
A girl ia going to be disappointed in my decor. I have no style, I am a bit spartonian in my decor, but my housekeeping and cooking skills are awesome! And I have two cats. :grumble:
Plus video games? I'm in.0 -
You guys are missing the point of what I wrote. You’re also contradicting stuff that you’ve written about elsewhere. I confess that while I don’t care about everyone reading this, I’m especially sad about those I consider friends.
I think sometimes people reading "they're judging me" into everything is more often reflective of them not being 100% comfortable with their lifestyle and decisions as they probably should be. Or jealous. Or whatever. When we're happy with our lives, we don't need to get all defensive and angry about someone with a different lifestyle. What works for them works for them, just like what works for us works for us.
In for jealousy!
I think your missing the point... We've heard from several girls about their rules and what they do and don't do.Some of us disagree. Those of us taht disagree are pointing out that there are alternatives. Christine especially wants more then she currently has. But she continues to do the same thing and expect different results.. That is the definition of insanity. We are just trying to open her horizons more... Jealousy would imply that I want something you have. That is not the case, you jumped into a conversation and turned it into those of us who make out outside of relationships and go on last minute dates display less value in ourselves. Can't we just be having fun?Honestly if you truely value yourself then the only opinion that should matter to you is your own. So going on a last minute date or kissing or even having sex on the first date is something thats ok...if your ok with it...0 -
You guys are missing the point of what I wrote. You’re also contradicting stuff that you’ve written about elsewhere. I confess that while I don’t care about everyone reading this, I’m especially sad about those I consider friends.
I think sometimes people reading "they're judging me" into everything is more often reflective of them not being 100% comfortable with their lifestyle and decisions as they probably should be. Or jealous. Or whatever. When we're happy with our lives, we don't need to get all defensive and angry about someone with a different lifestyle. What works for them works for them, just like what works for us works for us.
In for jealousy!
I think your missing the point... We've heard from several girls about their rules and what they do and don't do.Some of us disagree. Those of us taht disagree are pointing out that there are alternatives. Christine especially wants more then she currently has. But she continues to do the same thing and expect different results.. That is the definition of insanity. We are just trying to open her horizons more... Jealousy would imply that I want something you have. That is not the case, you jumped into a conversation and turned it into those of us who make out outside of relationships and go on last minute dates display less value in ourselves. Can't we just be having fun?Honestly if you truely value yourself then the only opinion that should matter to you is your own. So going on a last minute date or kissing or even having sex on the first date is something thats ok...if your ok with it...
I did no such thing.0 -
I think sometimes people reading "they're judging me" into everything is more often reflective of them not being 100% comfortable with their lifestyle and decisions as they probably should be. Or jealous. Or whatever. When we're happy with our lives, we don't need to get all defensive and angry about someone with a different lifestyle. What works for them works for them, just like what works for us works for us.Everyone thinks life for girls like Christine would get better if those girls would just toss their romantic notions of kissing/making out being special out the window. If they would just loosen their boundaries and "live a little."
So... if we disagree about the what is acceptable at the beginning of a relationship, we are defensive, jealous and faking the happiness in our lives. maybe it's not getting angry about someone with a different lifestyle, maybe it's getting angry about someone with a different lifestyle constantly implying that theirs is better than other's. That if we disagree, we arent as comfortable with our decisions as we should be? this comes off as very insulting and hurts my feelings that Im not allowed to have a different approach without being told it's a reflection of an unsatisfying lifestyle. That is a bit harsh and unfair and pretty much awful.
I never told christine she was wrong or shouldnt do things her way. Never not once. I was talking about how excluding sports and going to someone's house could limit dating options. Somehow this translated to us being the kind of women who dont care about romance and will make out with anyone because we dont believe in things being special.
yes, i did get hurt by that when I was 100% trying to explore the discussion of what limits dating possibilities.
if you bounce in and throw out an accusation like that - people will react. You cannot turn around afterwards and say, Im sorry but anyone who just reacted to that blanket insult must not be comfortable with their decisions and are jealous.
It's very instigating and unfair to do something like this.
I thought it was a pleasant, non-sexual conversation.0 -
I think the "go to a guys house on the first date" thing was more in reference to online dating when you haven't even met the guy yet. I too do not like the first MEETING to be at his house. But if we grab a coffee and don't want to end it then yeah, go from there IMO. This has more to do with having an escape route if there's no connection more than anything.
one girl wrote she wouldnt ever go to a guys house for a date.. Thats what we were referring to.. Meeting someone for the first time would hopefully be done in public
yes this 100% always first meetings in a public place.0
