First Date Rules
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I don't believe in this rules on first dates business, I just act as I normally would as there's no point pretending to be something else.
isn't there anything that you intentionally try to do or not do on a first date?
eg. i try not to curse but that doesnt mean i dont or i'm trying not to be myself, i just think its rude to be swearing in front of someone i've just met. first impressions are important i think.0 -
Saw this question posted somewhere and it got me thinking...no matter how you've met someone (in person or online), or how long you've known them, etc, what are your "First Date Rules"
Some of mine are:
No kissing on the first date. No cursing on the first date. (this is more for me, but i also don't like men to do that early on) Let the guy be a gentleman. (Sometimes women get caught up in being independent and self sufficient but on a date you should just sit back and be a lady) No talking about the ex
I've never thought of any rules but I like yours. I wouldn't kiss a guy on a first date and I try not to curse because I think it's unladylike. I do curse but its infrequent and more when I accidentally slam my head into a cabinet.
Another thing is about paying...I think he should pay, it's the gentlemanly thing to do and if you let me pay for my own meal or food, I'm gonna think you don't care that much. It makes a better impression.
the paying thing goes with the "let him be a gentleman". i don't think the girl should pay, or offer to pay not because i feel entitled or anything, but some men don't like that, and I certainly wouldn't expect them to let me pay.0 -
for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.0
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for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
I always find ways to make it up... my last date he got tickets to a lacross game, so I went and got us some beers.
BUT a round is only $5??? Where do you live?? A beer here is like $8.50 each0 -
for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
It's not about being cheap, I probably make more money than most men my age lol0 -
I met my current bf in a gay sauna. I think the dating rules might be different...0
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I know its 2013, but I would probably reject a man afterwards if he suggested within the first 5-10 dates that I pay. Why? I am very traditional, so I expect a man will provide for a woman regardless of how much he or she makes. Therefore, paying for dates shows me you are a good provider without expectations of something in return.
Don't blast me guys
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for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
It's not about being cheap, I probably make more money than most men my age lol
You can be rich and still be a cheapskate.0 -
for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
It's not about being cheap, I probably make more money than most men my age lol
You can be rich and still be a cheapskate.
True, but to me, it's more about showing that he cares enough about you to treat you.0 -
for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
I always find ways to make it up... my last date he got tickets to a lacross game, so I went and got us some beers.
BUT a round is only $5??? Where do you live?? A beer here is like $8.50 each
Dallas, TX. Lol, everything is cheap. And you just gave a perfect example of little gestures that go along way.0 -
for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
It's not about being cheap, I probably make more money than most men my age lol
You can be rich and still be a cheapskate.
True, but to me, it's more about showing that he cares enough about you to treat you.
same goes the other way, if I take a woman out on a few dates and she doesn't offer to at least buy something then where's the interest on her part?0 -
I know its 2013, but I would probably reject a man afterwards if he suggested within the first 5-10 dates that I pay. Why? I am very traditional, so I expect a man will provide for a woman regardless of how much he or she makes. Therefore, paying for dates shows me you are a good provider without expectations of something in return.
Don't blast me guys
not if you liked him. and i hope you're good at laundry, staying home, cleaning, cooking, buying groceries etc. because that's the other half of the equation with the traditional mindset that most women these days choose to ignore.
if women are good at none of those things yet feel the need to be catered then they are what I like to call a really bad investment.0 -
I don't think I actually have any first date rules, other than as Kits said, go with the flow and enjoy myself. Generally I think a first date is about seeing if you even like the other person's company, and it's hard to do that if you're following a scripted set of rules...
As far as being cheap, well, I am a bit of a cheapskate, but I don't think it's in a bad way. I have a free ticket to an opera on a Sunday afternoon, basically meaning all I will have to pay for is the gas and parking, but I am definitely turning it into a date (well, as long as I can find that 20 seconds of courage and actually follow through with asking him out AND assuming he doesn't say no :ohwell: )
I've found that you don't have to spend a lot to impress somebody, and I actually tend to be more impressed by guys who put a lot of thought into the date even if he hardly spends anything rather than the guys who blow a ton of money on the date but have no imagination.0 -
There are plenty of ways to show you care about someone - me, I think if we'd be talking 5-10 dates before she offered to cough up, I'd be worried she ONLY wanted my affection for the financial side.True, but to me, it's more about showing that he cares enough about you to treat you.
(But then, far from 'successful' at the game; especially at the moment, so what do I know!)0 -
for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
It's not about being cheap, I probably make more money than most men my age lol
You can be rich and still be a cheapskate.
True, but to me, it's more about showing that he cares enough about you to treat you.
same goes the other way, if I take a woman out on a few dates and she doesn't offer to at least buy something then where's the interest on her part?
It's hard to describe and I don't intend for this to get into a big discussion about paying for dates, but I think that a woman can indicate her interest to you without paying...a woman can certainly offer to pay on subsequent dates and I think that the man could be gracious and let her pick up a round as you suggested, but if a guy let me pay on date one, it would probably be a deal breaker.0 -
I know its 2013, but I would probably reject a man afterwards if he suggested within the first 5-10 dates that I pay. Why? I am very traditional, so I expect a man will provide for a woman regardless of how much he or she makes. Therefore, paying for dates shows me you are a good provider without expectations of something in return.
Don't blast me guys
not if you liked him. and i hope you're good at laundry, staying home, cleaning, cooking, buying groceries etc. because that's the other half of the equation with the traditional mindset that most women these days choose to ignore.
if women are good at none of those things yet feel the need to be catered then they are what I like to call a really bad investment.
BINGO!!!0 -
I know its 2013, but I would probably reject a man afterwards if he suggested within the first 5-10 dates that I pay. Why? I am very traditional, so I expect a man will provide for a woman regardless of how much he or she makes. Therefore, paying for dates shows me you are a good provider without expectations of something in return.
Don't blast me guys
not if you liked him. and i hope you're good at laundry, staying home, cleaning, cooking, buying groceries etc. because that's the other half of the equation with the traditional mindset that most women these days choose to ignore.
if women are good at none of those things yet feel the need to be catered then they are what I like to call a really bad investment.
I have yet to be in a relationship with a man who did any of those things while I was around... and yet I still paid for all of the groceries and/or my half of the bills, etc.
Yep.
<< naive pushover.0 -
for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
I always find ways to make it up... my last date he got tickets to a lacross game, so I went and got us some beers.
BUT a round is only $5??? Where do you live?? A beer here is like $8.50 each
Dallas, TX. Lol, everything is cheap. And you just gave a perfect example of little gestures that go along way.
I need to move there. Canada is expensive haha
This was date 3 though, I would still like a man to offer to pay date one. I had a man let me pay it all when I offered only to pay mine - wrong on so many levels. He was the main reason I have all my first date rules. He was creepy.0 -
for all the cheap women in the thread, at least buy a round of drinks, it's 5 dollars, and trust me, the guys will appreciate it.
I always find ways to make it up... my last date he got tickets to a lacross game, so I went and got us some beers.
BUT a round is only $5??? Where do you live?? A beer here is like $8.50 each
Dallas, TX. Lol, everything is cheap. And you just gave a perfect example of little gestures that go along way.
I need to move there. Canada is expensive haha
This was date 3 though, I would still like a man to offer to pay date one. I had a man let me pay it all when I offered only to pay mine - wrong on so many levels. He was the main reason I have all my first date rules. He was creepy.
i'm with ya on date one, i'll pay if i'm interested, even if i'm not i'll cover it, that said i'll usually meet for coffee or something first if it's a first time meet (online). i've been in dating situations where it's the 4th or 5th date and she hasn't paid a dime. that's about the time i start looking elsewhere.0 -
Generally I think a first date is about seeing if you even like the other person's company, and it's hard to do that if you're following a scripted set of rules...
This is kind of my point. You are there to see if you enjoy each other and want to go out again. You don't know me, so why would you want to hold my hand, kiss me, try to have sex with me.... When you don't know me!!! That's just how I see it. By date 2 you've established there's some interest and attraction so I open up to it a bit more. If I'm not wanting a kiss by date 2 I question why0
