Me - 3
Binge - 2

This flu/cold whatever it is, is really not helping my eating, I am craving carbs like no-one's business the last 2 days.

Dec 5

Suzanne--4
Binge--1

Thoughts/Emotions: I had felt tired today and felt some boredom too. Usually when taking a rest day the intensity of these urges grows larger. I know I need a rest day, but gotta work on having them without the binges. I think whats helping me get better is accepting the binge, and forgiving myself from there. I believe I will grow stronger because of that.

Rest days make my binge urges larger.

Good job self evaluating! Knowledge is power. You will grow stronger, forgiveness is way better than guilt.

Me: 2
Binge : 3

ugh.

December 5, 2012

Rachael - 5
The Binge - 0
Overcalories - 0

Almost blew it today and felt the urge to go food crazy, due to tiredness and stress from final's week at school and long days at work. Luckily I was able to yank the food away from me before I went over for the day. Close call.

When Greeky posted a list of her December goals, she inspired me to make my own list of goals for the month. I have five goals; the first one is about binging.

Having the goal written down so that I can read it is helping me this month.

This month my goal is to...

Have a binge-free month by making each day binge-free, one day at a time.

I am Beatrixia the Binge Slayer.

Why?: To stop unhealthy coping strategies in order to learn healthy ones. To stop eating too much added sugar, which will help improve my physical health & mental health and will help decrease my obesity. To start feeling at peace and in control around food.

When Greeky posted a list of her December goals, she inspired me to make my own list of goals for the month. I have five goals; the first one is about binging.

Having the goal written down so that I can read it is helping me this month.

This month my goal is to...

Have a binge-free month by making each day binge-free, one day at a time.

I am Beatrixia the Binge Slayer.

Why?: To stop unhealthy coping strategies in order to learn healthy ones. To stop eating too much added sugar, which will help improve my physical health & mental health and will help decrease my obesity. To start feeling at peace and in control around food.

Love it!!!

Aww, I'm so glad I inspired you! Great goal and GREAT job being binge-free too!!

Ok so I didn't make it through the afternoon without eating chocolate. And you know how that went....

I really felt like I tried hard to not cave today. In the past I have felt like I gave in too easily so I've really been making an attempt to do everything I can to stop it. I reached out for help, read my goals, stayed on mfp more than usual, read a lot of good stuff and still couldn't beat it. (I guess I could've journaled but I don't journal, although I probably should.) So for a minute I thought, gosh I gave it my all and still failed! I'm a failure! BUT...another one of my goals this month is no negative self talk and punishment if I slip. So now I'm trying to forgive myself and put it in the past but more importantly, learn from it. I'm not sure where I went wrong actually but I guess I learned a few things. Or at least observed a few things. This morning I felt awesome - confident and light. This evening I feel heavy, huge and depressed. And regretful, disappointed, all these things...so not worth it now but at the time I either don't think about it or convince myself that I don't care. I can tell again too since I haven't been eating much sugar lately, after ingesting it I felt totally high and numb. It's not all about the taste - it really does numb me out and change me. At first I feel better but afterward when the reality and regret sets in, I am a different person - one that I don't like or want to be. Cranky, mean, short with others...not good. It was very noticeable to me today. UGH. So, what will it take for me to remember this??? I seem to forget after I feel better and then the cycle continues....

So as of today:
Me - 4
Binge - 1

Didn't finish logging today. I know I should log everything before I eat it...but when I'm in "binge mode" I can't log, my thoughts are consumed, obsessing about what I'm going to eat even though I know I shouldn't and all this crazy stuff. It's like I can't think of anything else. Yuck.

Thank you all for your support today, I really appreciate it. Tomorrow will be a good day. I don't want this to continue into tomorrow. I realize AGAIN that I don't want live like this. It sucks!

Ok so I didn't make it through the afternoon without eating chocolate. And you know how that went....

I really felt like I tried hard to not cave today. In the past I have felt like I gave in too easily so I've really been making an attempt to do everything I can to stop it. I reached out for help, read my goals, stayed on mfp more than usual, read a lot of good stuff and still couldn't beat it. (I guess I could've journaled but I don't journal, although I probably should.) So for a minute I thought, gosh I gave it my all and still failed! I'm a failure! BUT...another one of my goals this month is no negative self talk and punishment if I slip. So now I'm trying to forgive myself and put it in the past but more importantly, learn from it. I'm not sure where I went wrong actually but I guess I learned a few things. Or at least observed a few things. This morning I felt awesome - confident and light. This evening I feel heavy, huge and depressed. And regretful, disappointed, all these things...so not worth it now but at the time I either don't think about it or convince myself that I don't care. I can tell again too since I haven't been eating much sugar lately, after ingesting it I felt totally high and numb. It's not all about the taste - it really does numb me out and change me. At first I feel better but afterward when the reality and regret sets in, I am a different person - one that I don't like or want to be. Cranky, mean, short with others...not good. It was very noticeable to me today. UGH. So, what will it take for me to remember this??? I seem to forget after I feel better and then the cycle continues....

So as of today:
Me - 4
Binge - 1

Didn't finish logging today. I know I should log everything before I eat it...but when I'm in "binge mode" I can't log, my thoughts are consumed, obsessing about what I'm going to eat even though I know I shouldn't and all this crazy stuff. It's like I can't think of anything else. Yuck.

Thank you all for your support today, I really appreciate it. Tomorrow will be a good day. I don't want this to continue into tomorrow. I realize AGAIN that I don't want live like this. It sucks!

Don't be so hard on yourself. The reason we are doing these challenges is to figure out what are causing our binges and how we can try to stop them. We are not always gonna succeed, unfortunately, but we can take these failures and learn from them. Today is a new day.....

Ok so I didn't make it through the afternoon without eating chocolate. And you know how that went....

I really felt like I tried hard to not cave today. In the past I have felt like I gave in too easily so I've really been making an attempt to do everything I can to stop it. I reached out for help, read my goals, stayed on mfp more than usual, read a lot of good stuff and still couldn't beat it. (I guess I could've journaled but I don't journal, although I probably should.) So for a minute I thought, gosh I gave it my all and still failed! I'm a failure! BUT...another one of my goals this month is no negative self talk and punishment if I slip. So now I'm trying to forgive myself and put it in the past but more importantly, learn from it. I'm not sure where I went wrong actually but I guess I learned a few things. Or at least observed a few things. This morning I felt awesome - confident and light. This evening I feel heavy, huge and depressed. And regretful, disappointed, all these things...so not worth it now but at the time I either don't think about it or convince myself that I don't care. I can tell again too since I haven't been eating much sugar lately, after ingesting it I felt totally high and numb. It's not all about the taste - it really does numb me out and change me. At first I feel better but afterward when the reality and regret sets in, I am a different person - one that I don't like or want to be. Cranky, mean, short with others...not good. It was very noticeable to me today. UGH. So, what will it take for me to remember this??? I seem to forget after I feel better and then the cycle continues....

So as of today:
Me - 4
Binge - 1

Didn't finish logging today. I know I should log everything before I eat it...but when I'm in "binge mode" I can't log, my thoughts are consumed, obsessing about what I'm going to eat even though I know I shouldn't and all this crazy stuff. It's like I can't think of anything else. Yuck.

Thank you all for your support today, I really appreciate it. Tomorrow will be a good day. I don't want this to continue into tomorrow. I realize AGAIN that I don't want live like this. It sucks!

You are NOT a failure!!! Day by day. You can do this!

W, Dec 5

beatrixia: 5
The Binge: 0

You are rocking this!! Awesome job!

Ok so I didn't make it through the afternoon without eating chocolate. And you know how that went....

I really felt like I tried hard to not cave today. In the past I have felt like I gave in too easily so I've really been making an attempt to do everything I can to stop it. I reached out for help, read my goals, stayed on mfp more than usual, read a lot of good stuff and still couldn't beat it. (I guess I could've journaled but I don't journal, although I probably should.) So for a minute I thought, gosh I gave it my all and still failed! I'm a failure! BUT...another one of my goals this month is no negative self talk and punishment if I slip. So now I'm trying to forgive myself and put it in the past but more importantly, learn from it. I'm not sure where I went wrong actually but I guess I learned a few things. Or at least observed a few things. This morning I felt awesome - confident and light. This evening I feel heavy, huge and depressed. And regretful, disappointed, all these things...so not worth it now but at the time I either don't think about it or convince myself that I don't care. I can tell again too since I haven't been eating much sugar lately, after ingesting it I felt totally high and numb. It's not all about the taste - it really does numb me out and change me. At first I feel better but afterward when the reality and regret sets in, I am a different person - one that I don't like or want to be. Cranky, mean, short with others...not good. It was very noticeable to me today. UGH. So, what will it take for me to remember this??? I seem to forget after I feel better and then the cycle continues....

So as of today:
Me - 4
Binge - 1

Didn't finish logging today. I know I should log everything before I eat it...but when I'm in "binge mode" I can't log, my thoughts are consumed, obsessing about what I'm going to eat even though I know I shouldn't and all this crazy stuff. It's like I can't think of anything else. Yuck.

Thank you all for your support today, I really appreciate it. Tomorrow will be a good day. I don't want this to continue into tomorrow. I realize AGAIN that I don't want live like this. It sucks!

You are NOT a failure!!! Day by day. You can do this!

Agreed! You're doing so well. Learning from the binges, finding triggers. I love how you were talking that way and then remembered your goals. Self awareness .

Me: 3

The Binge: 3

December 6th, 2012

I made a "healthy " version of a certain food (not going to mention food names to avoid triggering others) and ate like 6 pieces of it. That was almost all of the pan (with 3 servings left)
The binge started ridiculing me and telling me I should just eat the rest and then mark today as a "binge day", and my thoughts started going to how I could just binge on 3,000 calories today and that wouldn't make much difference to this month... etc....
I said NO. Put the pan away and stopped. I can have the food any day, any meal I'm hungry. I don't need to eat everything in site all at once. Also, I did kind of eat too much of what I made... but it was 600 ish calories total and I'm just going to count that as lunch. It isn't ruining my day, and I was hungry.

Tomorrow I shall win again and then be ahead of the binge!

That is the BEST attitude. I am phenomenal and throwing a whole day away from a single slip up..I can never turn it around the same day! AWesome job recognizing how you feel and how much better you will feel with your decisions : ) Proud!!

I wanna play!

December 2012

Colleen- 3
The Binge- 2

I have planned my dinner and pre-logged for today, so I am optimistic about giving myself another point tonight! *fingers crossed*

Here is my results so far as of 12/6:

Suzanne--5
Binge-1

I feel better from last nights binge. I had one treat today and kept it at that, and STILL have 800 calories after dinner to spend. So I'm proud of winning myself another point and staying in control. All we can do is take it day by day. I liked how I saw somewhere a person would say.."I will not binge today." As in taking it by the day and I like that. :happy:

Elizabeth 6
Binge 0

I am calling today over--dishes washed and kitchen closed. I have felt binge-like all afternoon. Just going outside for a couple minutes seemed to really help. I almost gave in a couple of times and made a very conscious decision that I really did not want to binge. I am proud of myself for getting through today. Another ME day.