Do we eat to hurt ourselves?

2»

Replies

  • Niki_Fitz
    Niki_Fitz Posts: 945 Member
    PamelaR64 wrote: »
    During a recent emotional binge, I wondered if I was eating to hurt myself. Women who hurt/self-injure themselves seem to have many of the same reasons/causes those of us who binge or emotionally eat do. I have an appointment with my therapist today and I plan to ask him his opinion...

    I ask myself his all the time. Because it is self harm, especially when there is no physical hunger and maybe discomfort happening and we know rationally that the discomfort will increase yet continue the behavior.

    I also ask “why do I do this?” but haven’t had any good answers, except that maybe my self esteem is low, I’m disappointed on myself and/or my situation and feeling physical discomfort is easier to process than emotional discomfort.
  • clsumrall1
    clsumrall1 Posts: 491 Member
    We are being just as abusive as the men or women who had abused us when we are young. We have made a judgement on our feelings about the inner fear we are experiencing. Instead we need to just recognize the emotion and not make that judgment. Just experienced the felling of sadness or fear or alarm or whatever the moment brings up.
  • Gracedtimes2
    Gracedtimes2 Posts: 38 Member
    Wow! Amazing insights all of you have. Thanks for your posts.
    I’ve been pondering and researching that some emotional and/or binge eating could be part emotional and also part of imbalances of feel-good brain chemicals, such as serotonin, dopamine, norepinephrine, etc.. Childhood and adult trauma can actually alter the flow of these chemicals, creating an imbalance that can make us feel a little more raw than others. Our brain chemicals play a large part in our eating cycles, and if unbalanced, like most addictions, we will attempt to balance (and feed) those chemicals to ease stress, tension, depression, etc...
    I don’t have a solution to this. I wish I did. However, our brains aren’t stone and our choices can help restore some balance—like exercise, eating Whole Foods, sleep, meditation, healing trauma—all which can help cease the connection of using food to ease emotions, and yet harm ourselves in the process. Also, some anti-depressants can help restore imbalances, helping some to feel more calm, less stressed and stop cravings like sugar and carbs (which increase serotonin).
    Thanks to all for your courage, efforts, and sharing along this path towards health.
  • clsumrall1
    clsumrall1 Posts: 491 Member
    Happy Fourth of July all. This is such a great day in the history of America and a great day of history for Those of us on this site. Instead of Alchol today can I recommend a fun drinking. Blender party. Fresh watermelon plus cucumber and a squeeze of lemon and stevia with mint. A splash of your favorite bubble water that has no sugar but a fruit flavor. Light and refreshing for sure. Good luck to everyone today let’s make good choices so we can make good memories of our new healthy history of community commitment
  • Gamliela
    Gamliela Posts: 2,469 Member
    @clsumrall1 Thank you for the insightful post three up. I was stunned when I read it. Happy 4 th of July.
    @Gracedtimes2 Your suggestions about excersize, good food etc. do work for me. I spiraled downward for a few months and just the last week found walking, meditation and dropping one significant unhealthy eating habit has made all the difference.
    I realize I am punishing myself as well as trying to nourish myself, I just can't to get it right for very long. All in all I find myself better more and more of the time.
    I'm very grateful for this group and the inspirations posted here.
    Best to all of you!
    and yes, let's make good choices for good memories and a healthy history, what a brilliant way of saying that !
  • hoer5641
    hoer5641 Posts: 1 Member
    Wow never thought of it that way . That is very insightful for me. Thank you
  • SpicyWater
    SpicyWater Posts: 99 Member
    mkellam wrote: »
    For me it's not quite self-harm but more an act of rebellion. I'm stressed out trying to fulfill many obligations, trying to be a "good person," a "responsible person," and letting my perfectionist streak call the shots? Yea, something breaks eventually and it's like I suddenly view healthy eating as another obligation and I buck it HARD out of some bizarre act of reclaiming my choices. It feels like I'm rebelling or liberating in the moment, but then later I just feel gross bc often I get a sugar crash or didn't even enjoy the actual food. I've been working on relaxing and saying no more often and it has helped with this urge but it still crops up. Does this make any sort of sense?

    This rings true for me. I know EXACTLY how you feel.
  • jules8203
    jules8203 Posts: 12 Member
    I think a big part of my problem with emotional eating hasn't really been thinking 'Am I hurting myself," so much as trying to comfort an emotion that is out control. Reading these comments kinda makes me think more, like realizing why I'm doing what I'm doing and trying to get to the root of the problem. The last year my weight has been yo-yo. Because of health problems, I gained an unhealthy amount of weight after I had my daughter. I'm 4'11". My average weight before my daughter was 135. I left the hospital weighing 145. A few months later had issues with my thyroid and kidney's. I shot up to over 200 pounds About a year ago, I decided to join a gym, lost 30 pounds, only to gain 30 pounds. Asked my doctor to see a nutritionist as well. She suggested this website and set a goal of 1400 calories a day, which I have been battling. I know depression has set in and trying to be more mindful. I currently stand at 180. I like reading others comments for suggestions and possibly pointers so I'm not ultimately hurting myself by emotional (and sometimes mindless eating).
  • ladyzherra
    ladyzherra Posts: 438 Member
    I am a food addict and the way that I use food disrespects my body and my spirit. I have always known this and there has been a part of me that feels a desire to be punished. But I always move toward the light and a journey of healing is important to me. Years and years of recovery and searching within myself for answers is a slow process, but worth it. I wish you all luck on your own journeys.
  • VeggiGirl75
    VeggiGirl75 Posts: 12 Member
    I just realized recently I’ve been doing this . It’s a pattern of self sabotaging my self . I get stressed, angry, etc . I eat crazy quit hobbies, games , even some friendships.
  • Grimmerdhore
    Grimmerdhore Posts: 63 Member
    I have also realized that failing to respect my body is a form of self-betrayal, usually done in response to something I have done wrong (like failing to make that call to my family), or something I am refusing to acknowledge (like the embarrassment of doing something incorrectly at work). By taking care of the small things while they are still small I've begun to minimize the self-betrayal and respect has returned. Hope you all the best on your adventures too. Feel free to add me.
  • RastaLousGirl
    RastaLousGirl Posts: 2,119 Member
    That's pretty deep, and I bet some people can relate to that. Personally, my binges come from afraid of going hungry. Long story very short. My birth mom had me and my sister living in a tent with only peanut butter and jelly, as a form of punishment. This was to teach us to appreciate things. My dad got us from her, so when I moved back with him we had food a plenty (my dad was a butcher and my stepmom his wrapper). I ate so much, because I was always afraid it was my last meal. I was so active and walked everywhere in high school, that I didn't really gain weight until I quit sports and dance after Graduation.

    So, I do emotionally eat. But, personally, my triggers are a little different. Which, I did have to get help with, even a very supportive group. But, I don't believe I want to hurt my self. It was more of the lines that I would rather have a full belly than an empty one.
  • joygrrrl
    joygrrrl Posts: 19 Member
    It sure feels like I binge eat to self sabotage. It's a vicious circle of over eating the wrong food, continuing to eat when completely full, quietly shaming myself after, and during actualy, knowing I have the ability to stop but purposefully don't.
    I hide my over eating from my peers and basically fall off the wagon and continue to do this for a period of time fueled by my dissapointment in myself.
    Almost hate eating at times. It actually blows my mind that I've continued to do iteven though I'm fully aware of it.
  • aletheia_vox
    aletheia_vox Posts: 12 Member
    When I’m binging it is definitely self-harm. I literally need to eat to the point where I feel TERRIBLE. That’s the point when I feel calm again.

    That said, I’ve only binged a few times in the past few years. It’s gone way down since being in therapy and on medication to deal with underlying issues.
  • ShredWeek1
    ShredWeek1 Posts: 188 Member
    I think addictions are tough to break because they do make us feel good...I loved smoking, absolutely loved it. Never thought about the consequences. I have friends who are destructively heavy drinkers...and they love alcohol. I think where it starts to hurt is when it becomes the only way that we rely upon to make ourselves feel better. Lately, I've become very structured in my eating...because I recognize that when I'm down, what I want to do is eat...it is a form of self-soothing.
  • ladyzherra
    ladyzherra Posts: 438 Member
    @ShredWeek1 I hear what you're saying about how structure can really help with food addiction. In the last two weeks I have weighed all of my food and I found that this made a huge difference. I suppose that this increased structure has helped me move toward my goals.

    I also understand what you mean about self-soothing. In fact, so many people can think of food addiction or binge eating as self-sabotage, which places a violent tone to it. And while sometimes my relationship with food IS violent, usually it really is an attempt to soothe myself. And I think there is a key difference in thinking of it one way over the other.
  • ShredWeek1
    ShredWeek1 Posts: 188 Member
    That's very insightful. I'm going to make a commitment to weighing and measuring my food as well!