February Challenge - Me vs. The Binge
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Me: 8
The Binge: 3
I binged today. I went a day binge free and then binged again the next day. My mood hasn't been great - my pants feel tighter and I'm sure the scales gone up 5 lbs. It takes awhile to get myself back to normal eating once one binge hits.
It also takes time to get the scale back down again which is so depressing.
What have I become? I often catch myself wondering. It's only late morning and my calorie count is above 3,000. I have no chance to make this day better - but I can spend the rest of the day fighting the urge to binge more?
There's this guy I like, and I want to be honest with him at all times, but this is a very sensitive struggle, and I feel like if I tell anyone around me they will 1) not understand and 2) think of how much of a pig I am. I'm sorry if I'm offending anyone, I just feel so horrible about my secret habit right now, and my mind isn't in a very good place.
Here's hope for tomorrow :flowerforyou:
I know how rough it can be when the bingeing starts. i know for me, I can be fine for a while, sometimes weeks, sometimes when I'm lucky enough months, and then one bad choice leads to a binge, which leads to another, which leads to a binge weekend, then a binge week... It's awful, it really is. I've nearly been with my boyfriend for 2 years now, and I've always wanted to tell him. I just never know how to even start the conversation, or how he will react. Needless to say, I've never found the courage to be honest with him, which really says a lot because he knows just about everything about me. I really want to tell him, just not sure how. I commend you for wanting to be so upfront with this boy, you must like him a lot! You''ll just have to gauge your trust with him, if he cares for you enough he will understand. My boyfriend would understand also, I guess I'm just not great with confrontation. Anyway, stay strong, remind yourself you are worth it, and that you have power over the binge, it doesn't have to control you! Keep your head up!0 -
Me: 8
The Binge: 3
I binged today. I went a day binge free and then binged again the next day. My mood hasn't been great - my pants feel tighter and I'm sure the scales gone up 5 lbs. It takes awhile to get myself back to normal eating once one binge hits.
It also takes time to get the scale back down again which is so depressing.
What have I become? I often catch myself wondering. It's only late morning and my calorie count is above 3,000. I have no chance to make this day better - but I can spend the rest of the day fighting the urge to binge more?
There's this guy I like, and I want to be honest with him at all times, but this is a very sensitive struggle, and I feel like if I tell anyone around me they will 1) not understand and 2) think of how much of a pig I am. I'm sorry if I'm offending anyone, I just feel so horrible about my secret habit right now, and my mind isn't in a very good place.
Here's hope for tomorrow :flowerforyou:
Sophrosyne, I feel everything you're saying here. It's incredibly difficult to pull back once the binge has "ruined" your day. It's hard to remember but just think: Will it make me feel better to keep binging? NO. It will only feel worse. You know it. I know it. The devil is in resisting. You can do it though
As for your s/o, that's also a very sensitive issue. I have been married to my husband for 1 yr 7 mo, and we've been together for 6 years total. I am not kidding when I say, that I just now, literally last week, told my husband about my problem. Not only is it very personal, but to me, embarrassing and shameful to discuss. But I wanted to be open and finally found a moment when it wasn't weird to talk about it. I still feel like he doesn't completely understand the depth of the struggle, but I didn't want to make it a whole "woe is me" sort of thing. I'm glad I finally admitted it, but at the same time, I'm not sure it's helped anything yet.
Also, there's NO way he could think of you any differently. It's a struggle, sure, but it does NOT say anything bad about you in any way. PLEASE remember that!
This is going to be a very personal decision for you. I don't think anyone can advise when it's the right time, or how to go about discussing it. I do think, however, that finally being open helps lift a bit off your shoulders. Not a whole lot, and maybe it's just my psych background, but there's power in sharing struggles. That's why we're all on this forum right?
Best of luck girl 0 -
Sophrosyne, I feel everything you're saying here. It's incredibly difficult to pull back once the binge has "ruined" your day. It's hard to remember but just think: Will it make me feel better to keep binging? NO. It will only feel worse. You know it. I know it. The devil is in resisting. You can do it though
As for your s/o, that's also a very sensitive issue. I have been married to my husband for 1 yr 7 mo, and we've been together for 6 years total. I am not kidding when I say, that I just now, literally last week, told my husband about my problem. Not only is it very personal, but to me, embarrassing and shameful to discuss. But I wanted to be open and finally found a moment when it wasn't weird to talk about it. I still feel like he doesn't completely understand the depth of the struggle, but I didn't want to make it a whole "woe is me" sort of thing. I'm glad I finally admitted it, but at the same time, I'm not sure it's helped anything yet.
Also, there's NO way he could think of you any differently. It's a struggle, sure, but it does NOT say anything bad about you in any way. PLEASE remember that!
This is going to be a very personal decision for you. I don't think anyone can advise when it's the right time, or how to go about discussing it. I do think, however, that finally being open helps lift a bit off your shoulders. Not a whole lot, and maybe it's just my psych background, but there's power in sharing struggles. That's why we're all on this forum right?
Best of luck girl
That's true... I have ate more since the time I wrote the post, it's hard to control, these negative feelings are bringing me down today.
I know - in my head - that give it a couple days I'll be feeling better. After a few days of eating right, exercising, treating my self with care... but then whenever I have another binge - it's like I've destroyed all progress ... even though I know that isn't true. and that I'm making progress every time I have a good day.
Thank you so much. You're right, it's a struggle, but it shouldn't change his view of me.... that's really the truth, regardless of what my thoughts tell me.
I just feel so sad right now and I can't bring myself to tell him yet, plus it's not like we're married. It's a terrible feelings to want to share and be close to someone, but having something you just can't tell them yet. And you don't know if you'll ever be able to explain.
I'm very thankful for this group, this is a safe place to talk it out, even if it's only online. You all understand me better than anyone I know outside of the computer.
I appreciate you all.0 -
Realised I skipped a few days on the binge free days so this is corrected... (I actually made it over a week, I haven't not binged or a week in so so long... )
Me: 8
Binge: 0
Binge free days: 80 -
Me - 9
binge - 20 -
I know how rough it can be when the bingeing starts. i know for me, I can be fine for a while, sometimes weeks, sometimes when I'm lucky enough months, and then one bad choice leads to a binge, which leads to another, which leads to a binge weekend, then a binge week... It's awful, it really is. I've nearly been with my boyfriend for 2 years now, and I've always wanted to tell him. I just never know how to even start the conversation, or how he will react. Needless to say, I've never found the courage to be honest with him, which really says a lot because he knows just about everything about me. I really want to tell him, just not sure how. I commend you for wanting to be so upfront with this boy, you must like him a lot! You''ll just have to gauge your trust with him, if he cares for you enough he will understand. My boyfriend would understand also, I guess I'm just not great with confrontation. Anyway, stay strong, remind yourself you are worth it, and that you have power over the binge, it doesn't have to control you! Keep your head up!
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Dang, I totally missed your reply here earlier! Thanks for the support girl. Yeah, I'm not good on confrontation either.
Thanks again! :flowerforyou:0 -
Me: 3
The Binge: 8
Days back to Ⓥ{Veganism}: 30 -
February 2014: - February Goal is to log it all!! With private diary I should be able to manage this one.
Mollie - 4
The Binge - 7
Days I did NOT log it all - 3
0 -
EOD 2/11/14
me: 8
b: 30 -
2/12/14:
Me: 1
Binge: 00 -
February 2014
Me: 6
Binge: 4
Days Binge Free: 2
Days I didn't log it all: 3
It's a new day, and I can always choose to be healthy.0 -
Me--11
The B. - 0
:happy:0 -
February 2014
Diane - 5
The Binge - 60 -
Me - 7
The Binge - 40 -
Me: 9
Binge: 0
Binge free days: 90 -
Me: 4
The Binge: 8
Days back to Ⓥ{Veganism}: 4
Starting to feel back in control... hoping it lasts this time!0 -
Me - 9
binge - 3
Logged it all today. Owning it, but that doesn't make me any happier. Why did I binge? Maybe i got overhungry, or stressed about something. Why do I want to stuff myself with food instead of deal with life?0 -
2/12/14
me: 9
b: 30 -
2/13/14
Me: 10
The Binge:30 -
February 2014
Me: 7
Binge: 4
Days Binge Free: 3
Days I didn't log it all: 3
It's a new day, and I can always choose to be healthy.
"I've got the eye of the tiger, a fighter, dancing through the fire,
'Cuz I am a champion, and you're gonna hear me roar
Louder, louder than the lion!
'Cuz I am a champion! And you're gonna hear me ROAR!"
Okay, this may sound silly. But I was staring down a bowl of something I could very well binge on (no specific foods, I know), and I just thought: no, I can fight this. And this song started playing through my head, then I started humming it, and before I knew it, I was straight up belting it out! :laugh: In a really unexpected way, this helped me fight the urge.0
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