December Challenge - Me vs. The Binge
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T, Dec 18
beatrix: 17
The Binge: 1 (12/14)
I'm doing so much better this month than last because I'm letting myself acknowledge/feel my emotions.
Also, I know that whenever I talk on the phone with a certain loved one who is going through a hard time, I _will_ have a binge urge...sometimes within about 6 hours, sometimes the next day. But it happens invariably. So, now I know to expect this _every time_ we talk on the phone, and I just tell myself, "I am feeling X because of X, and I am NOT going to binge. I'm not going to let this relationship control me THAT way."
Giving myself permission to feel "negative" emotions is very freeing. I acknowledge them without judgement, try to make sure I'm not catastrophizing, taking on someone else's responsibilities as my own, or taking on _their_ anxiety/stress as my own, and then I try to let it go. (When someone around me starts wigging out, I usually get super tense. I have been saying to myself, "That is his/her stress, Bea, not yours." This little thing, amazingly enough, helps me relax almost immediately.)
Also, I have been trying to distract myself when a binge urge happens. I'm trying to observe it ("Ah, this is a binge urge.") and then try to occupy my mind with something else. I sometimes say a prayer that has always helped me with binge urges, and then I try to turn my mind toward another activity, usually physical activity or reading. Eventually, my mind realizes that there's no reason to keep obsessing about bingefoodX because...well, my body is not gonna get it!
I did have a binge on Friday, but it was so wee compared to my previous binges. I had to really evaluate if it was a binge or not. I think the binge mindset was creeping in, so I'm marking it as a binge. But I truly see this as a success because I was able to stop it before I became out of control.
Thanks to you all for your support and encouragement over the past months...I'm so happy to see some changes in my thinking. I think I may print out my posts in the thread this month and put them in my binge journal as reminders of how to approach food & emotions the next time I'm in an emotional muddle.
Have a good rest-of-the week, everyone.
I have issues with negative emotions too. I feel guilty if I feel any anger towards anyone else and tend to always turn negative emotions inwards on myself. I also get very, very tense and wound up if anyone around me is negative or in a bad mood. It impacts me very badly. Also relate to certain relationships leading to my binge eating, allowed interraction with someone to do that to me a few months ago, never again. I am just trying to remain focussed on how little enjoyment I get from binges in reality...the food ceases to be pleasurable and the feelings after are always unpleasant.0 -
T, Dec 18
beatrix: 17
The Binge: 1 (12/14)
I'm doing so much better this month than last because I'm letting myself acknowledge/feel my emotions.
Also, I know that whenever I talk on the phone with a certain loved one who is going through a hard time, I _will_ have a binge urge...sometimes within about 6 hours, sometimes the next day. But it happens invariably. So, now I know to expect this _every time_ we talk on the phone, and I just tell myself, "I am feeling X because of X, and I am NOT going to binge. I'm not going to let this relationship control me THAT way."
Giving myself permission to feel "negative" emotions is very freeing. I acknowledge them without judgement, try to make sure I'm not catastrophizing, taking on someone else's responsibilities as my own, or taking on _their_ anxiety/stress as my own, and then I try to let it go. (When someone around me starts wigging out, I usually get super tense. I have been saying to myself, "That is his/her stress, Bea, not yours." This little thing, amazingly enough, helps me relax almost immediately.)
Also, I have been trying to distract myself when a binge urge happens. I'm trying to observe it ("Ah, this is a binge urge.") and then try to occupy my mind with something else. I sometimes say a prayer that has always helped me with binge urges, and then I try to turn my mind toward another activity, usually physical activity or reading. Eventually, my mind realizes that there's no reason to keep obsessing about bingefoodX because...well, my body is not gonna get it!
I did have a binge on Friday, but it was so wee compared to my previous binges. I had to really evaluate if it was a binge or not. I think the binge mindset was creeping in, so I'm marking it as a binge. But I truly see this as a success because I was able to stop it before I became out of control.
Thanks to you all for your support and encouragement over the past months...I'm so happy to see some changes in my thinking. I think I may print out my posts in the thread this month and put them in my binge journal as reminders of how to approach food & emotions the next time I'm in an emotional muddle.
Have a good rest-of-the week, everyone.
Very good!!!0 -
T, Dec 18
beatrix: 17
The Binge: 1 (12/14)
I'm doing so much better this month than last because I'm letting myself acknowledge/feel my emotions.
Also, I know that whenever I talk on the phone with a certain loved one who is going through a hard time, I _will_ have a binge urge...sometimes within about 6 hours, sometimes the next day. But it happens invariably. So, now I know to expect this _every time_ we talk on the phone, and I just tell myself, "I am feeling X because of X, and I am NOT going to binge. I'm not going to let this relationship control me THAT way."
Giving myself permission to feel "negative" emotions is very freeing. I acknowledge them without judgement, try to make sure I'm not catastrophizing, taking on someone else's responsibilities as my own, or taking on _their_ anxiety/stress as my own, and then I try to let it go. (When someone around me starts wigging out, I usually get super tense. I have been saying to myself, "That is his/her stress, Bea, not yours." This little thing, amazingly enough, helps me relax almost immediately.)
Also, I have been trying to distract myself when a binge urge happens. I'm trying to observe it ("Ah, this is a binge urge.") and then try to occupy my mind with something else. I sometimes say a prayer that has always helped me with binge urges, and then I try to turn my mind toward another activity, usually physical activity or reading. Eventually, my mind realizes that there's no reason to keep obsessing about bingefoodX because...well, my body is not gonna get it!
I did have a binge on Friday, but it was so wee compared to my previous binges. I had to really evaluate if it was a binge or not. I think the binge mindset was creeping in, so I'm marking it as a binge. But I truly see this as a success because I was able to stop it before I became out of control.
Thanks to you all for your support and encouragement over the past months...I'm so happy to see some changes in my thinking. I think I may print out my posts in the thread this month and put them in my binge journal as reminders of how to approach food & emotions the next time I'm in an emotional muddle.
Have a good rest-of-the week, everyone.
You are in such a good place, Bea! Thank you for sharing your insight because it really applies to so many of us. You are really good about putting these thoughts into words :-)0 -
T, Dec 18
beatrix: 17
The Binge: 1 (12/14)
I'm doing so much better this month than last because I'm letting myself acknowledge/feel my emotions.
Also, I know that whenever I talk on the phone with a certain loved one who is going through a hard time, I _will_ have a binge urge...sometimes within about 6 hours, sometimes the next day. But it happens invariably. So, now I know to expect this _every time_ we talk on the phone, and I just tell myself, "I am feeling X because of X, and I am NOT going to binge. I'm not going to let this relationship control me THAT way."
Giving myself permission to feel "negative" emotions is very freeing. I acknowledge them without judgement, try to make sure I'm not catastrophizing, taking on someone else's responsibilities as my own, or taking on _their_ anxiety/stress as my own, and then I try to let it go. (When someone around me starts wigging out, I usually get super tense. I have been saying to myself, "That is his/her stress, Bea, not yours." This little thing, amazingly enough, helps me relax almost immediately.)
Also, I have been trying to distract myself when a binge urge happens. I'm trying to observe it ("Ah, this is a binge urge.") and then try to occupy my mind with something else. I sometimes say a prayer that has always helped me with binge urges, and then I try to turn my mind toward another activity, usually physical activity or reading. Eventually, my mind realizes that there's no reason to keep obsessing about bingefoodX because...well, my body is not gonna get it!
I did have a binge on Friday, but it was so wee compared to my previous binges. I had to really evaluate if it was a binge or not. I think the binge mindset was creeping in, so I'm marking it as a binge. But I truly see this as a success because I was able to stop it before I became out of control.
Thanks to you all for your support and encouragement over the past months...I'm so happy to see some changes in my thinking. I think I may print out my posts in the thread this month and put them in my binge journal as reminders of how to approach food & emotions the next time I'm in an emotional muddle.
Have a good rest-of-the week, everyone.
You are in such a good place, Bea! Thank you for sharing your insight because it really applies to so many of us. You are really good about putting these thoughts into words :-)
I really love it when she shares her thoughts - anyone could learn from them.0 -
T, Dec 18
beatrix: 17
Giving myself permission to feel "negative" emotions is very freeing. I acknowledge them without judgement, try to make sure I'm not catastrophizing, taking on someone else's responsibilities as my own, or taking on _their_ anxiety/stress as my own, and then I try to let it go. (When someone around me starts wigging out, I usually get super tense. I have been saying to myself, "That is his/her stress, Bea, not yours." This little thing, amazingly enough, helps me relax almost immediately.)
This is something I need to work on! Negative thoughts aren't ideal, of course, but I freak out whenever I feel anything unpleasant because I always feel like I have to be happy 24/7. Thanks for sharing this, and great job!!!0 -
Restarted 12/17
12/18
Lisa: 1
Binge: 10 -
Bev: 9
Binge: 9
Tied!0 -
Me - 10
Binge - 8
UGH after two days of holiday parties (junk food binge-fests, for me) I am so ready for the holidays to be over. I'm very full again today and I can't stand it. I have another holiday lunch tomorrow, ugh. It's at a restaurant and the way I'm feeling now I really want to eat healthy, or at least healthier than today and yesterday. I start to crave healthy food after I eat crappy for a couple days. I want to log the entire day tomorrow. I didn't yesterday and today.
I know how it is to eat and the food doesn't even taste good...it got to that point this afternoon for me. I ate so much and got so full that the food started to lose its taste but still kept eating anyway. I'm so regretting that now. I think once we get to a point of fullness, food just doesn't taste as good.
It's amazing to me (STILL! I forget easily) what a difference a couple of binge days makes after a few good days...I felt so good yesterday morning and so bloated and full this morning and even more bloated and full tonight. UGH. The good thing is I will feel better after a couple days of being back on track.
I appreciate your responses about the open/closed diary thing too, thank you.0 -
T, Dec 18
beatrix: 17
The Binge: 1 (12/14)
I'm doing so much better this month than last because I'm letting myself acknowledge/feel my emotions.
Also, I know that whenever I talk on the phone with a certain loved one who is going through a hard time, I _will_ have a binge urge...sometimes within about 6 hours, sometimes the next day. But it happens invariably. So, now I know to expect this _every time_ we talk on the phone, and I just tell myself, "I am feeling X because of X, and I am NOT going to binge. I'm not going to let this relationship control me THAT way."
Giving myself permission to feel "negative" emotions is very freeing. I acknowledge them without judgement, try to make sure I'm not catastrophizing, taking on someone else's responsibilities as my own, or taking on _their_ anxiety/stress as my own, and then I try to let it go. (When someone around me starts wigging out, I usually get super tense. I have been saying to myself, "That is his/her stress, Bea, not yours." This little thing, amazingly enough, helps me relax almost immediately.)
Also, I have been trying to distract myself when a binge urge happens. I'm trying to observe it ("Ah, this is a binge urge.") and then try to occupy my mind with something else. I sometimes say a prayer that has always helped me with binge urges, and then I try to turn my mind toward another activity, usually physical activity or reading. Eventually, my mind realizes that there's no reason to keep obsessing about bingefoodX because...well, my body is not gonna get it!
I did have a binge on Friday, but it was so wee compared to my previous binges. I had to really evaluate if it was a binge or not. I think the binge mindset was creeping in, so I'm marking it as a binge. But I truly see this as a success because I was able to stop it before I became out of control.
Thanks to you all for your support and encouragement over the past months...I'm so happy to see some changes in my thinking. I think I may print out my posts in the thread this month and put them in my binge journal as reminders of how to approach food & emotions the next time I'm in an emotional muddle.
Have a good rest-of-the week, everyone.
This is freakin' awesome! What an amazing turnaround! You are such an inspiration to me! I think I may print out your posts too! Thank you for sharing!0 -
December 2012:
Mollie - 14
The Binge - 4 (1st, 2nd, 11th, 15th)
Days I did not log it all - 2 (Goal to be no more than 4 days)0 -
December 2012:
Terry - 12
The Binge - 6
Logging days - 18 / 310 -
12-18-12
Me: 12
Binge: 6 (12/7, 12/8, 12/13, 12/14, 12/15, 12/16)
Still not a healthy day, but not a binge. Ugh, I just don't feel great either!0 -
Me: 9
The Binge: 120 -
Me - 12.
Binge - 7.
Bad day before it even started, stayed up too late and binged on a load of sweet stuff.0 -
Elizabeth 12
Binge 6 (12/7, 12/8, 12/13, 12/15, 12/16, 12/17)
I can't get the sugar out of my system. Feeling yuck and just don't care---It is like I say screw it until Jan 1. Sick, sick, sick. The holidays are so hard for me. It is also my husband's 40th b-day and we have a few celebrations coming up. We are also going to New Orleans right after Christmas. Geez!!! Going to be very hard.0 -
December 2012
Diane - 11
The Binge - 70 -
Elizabeth 12
Binge 6 (12/7, 12/8, 12/13, 12/15, 12/16, 12/17)
I can't get the sugar out of my system. Feeling yuck and just don't care---It is like I say screw it until Jan 1. Sick, sick, sick. The holidays are so hard for me. It is also my husband's 40th b-day and we have a few celebrations coming up. We are also going to New Orleans right after Christmas. Geez!!! Going to be very hard.
I've been trying not to have too much sugar, but I have been. I want to try to cut out most added sugars...but for now , moderation is keeping me from a binge. Maybe Jan 1st will be a better start..
Drink a lot of water and hang in there!
Enjoy your holiday traveling. Remember that there is a lot to enjoy aside from food. Focus on why you are there, and try to eat all meals slowly.
I find it good to make sure I set my fork down a bunch of times, and take tips of water...while talking to others - instead of eating too quickly... it's more mindful eating.0 -
Happy Hump day all!! You all are doing soo good!! I love support!! Thanks!:flowerforyou: Keep up the good work and 2013 is right around the corner.0
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19/12
Natalie: 10
Binge: 9
Today my grandmother died after a long illness.
I hate myself that I used it as an excuse to binge.0 -
19/12
Natalie: 10
Binge: 9
Today my grandmother died after a long illness.
I hate myself that I used it as an excuse to binge.
I'm sorry to hear about the loss.
On a positive note - you're still winning . The binge is behind you. ~0