Daily check in
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Well, done quite good for 1.5 days...No binge, trying to relax more. Still the evening to survive, feeling a bit like eating some trigger foods, but...Will try to avoid. Hope all goes well till bedtime!1
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Last night was a rough one. My neighbor was being loud for hours, while I was trying to listen to the baseball game. I got so anxious I became dizzy and started sweating. Then I couldn't sleep because of the anxiety. Of course, I turned to food to help calm me down. I kept waking up and going to eat, several times last night. I don't think it qualifies as a binge, since it was small snacks each time, but I definitely ate more than I originally planned to.
I talked to my landlord again about the noise. Not sure if anything can be done. I really need to stop getting so worked up over a little noise.0 -
Had a pretty rough day yesterday. I binged like crazy on a ton of carbs-granola, potato chips, pasta, and cheese. I had one binge in the afternoon and then another in the evening. Went to bed feeling pretty gross.
But today is a new day and I have not been having any binge urges. Usually the day after a big binge I don't have much of an appetite, but I still eat because I feel like I should. Tonight I am having some friends over to cook and make dessert. I hope that if anything I just overeat instead of binging. I am going to try to focus on the company instead of the food as well as eat my meal mindfully.
We'll see how it goes!1 -
Ok..I didnt make it...:( But I managed to stop...yes i started..yes i ate...but i stopped. Kind of feeling proud that I managed to regain control over food...and the binge. That gives hope.
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Yesterday was really bad for me. I managed to avoid bingeing until the late afternoon, but then I had six English muffins smothered in cheese, two pints of ice cream, 50 salt water taffies, three doughnuts, a box of Swedish fish, lots of bread, chocolate, a few bowls of almonds, tons of rice, and the list goes on and on and on. I'm definitely back in a bingeing cycle and really unhappy about it. My goal is to simply not binge again until Monday. Then after graduation, I can binge as much as I want that day. I just need to make it until then.0
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That's awesome. I honestly don't think I've managed to stop a binge once it's started until the next day. I usually start in the middle of the night, or an hour before bed. The most food is consumed between that night up until some time before noon, around 2,500-4,000cals at night alone. I'll "graze" smaller portions until 5, when I'm so sick I lie down and usually sleep. Afterwards, I try to remind myself of how sick I feel, but say screw it, and eat what I can until bed.Ok..I didnt make it...:( But I managed to stop...yes i started..yes i ate...but i stopped. Kind of feeling proud that I managed to regain control over food...and the binge. That gives hope.
Oddly, while I hadn't binged, I had that specific "after binge hunger" on Tuesday. A day or two after a binge, I'll be abnormally hungry, but it feels different from the norm. A little more... hollow?
Like I said in my previous post, I was very stress and had the strong urge to binge on Monday. Resisted, but I guess my body didn't expect me to.
That's rough. I really hope things start to improve soon.Yesterday was really bad for me. I managed to avoid bingeing until the late afternoon, but then I had six English muffins smothered in cheese, two pints of ice cream, 50 salt water taffies, three doughnuts, a box of Swedish fish, lots of bread, chocolate, a few bowls of almonds, tons of rice, and the list goes on and on and on. I'm definitely back in a bingeing cycle and really unhappy about it. My goal is to simply not binge again until Monday. Then after graduation, I can binge as much as I want that day. I just need to make it until then.
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A few of you have sent me messages checking up on me so I just wanted to check in really quick. I'm doing okay, therapy is really helping me. I've realized that MFP is not a safe place for me right now so I've decided to step away from it. Calorie counting and weighing/logging food are not good for my obsessive mentality. Coming on here and seeing other's losing weight, although I'm proud of everyone, is a major trigger for me because I am not losing at the moment. Also reading about everyone else's binges has also become a trigger for me. I'm learning through my therapy that I worry far too much about what other people are doing and what others might think about me. So right now I'm trying to rid myself of the background noise in my mind and focus on me. Maybe I will be back some day, who knows. I want to wish all of you good luck and that we all beat this disorder.1
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I'm really happy to hear from you, and really glad that you're making this decision. I suspected that was probably the case! I suspect once I start, I will find myself in a similar situation. Best wishes to you!0
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I binged a lot today. Got to work and nobody had touched the treats I binged on on Monday so I took it upon myself to eat them all. Then my supervisor bought me a milkshake. So naturally I came home and binged some more. Right now I'm gorging myself on Reese's pieces and milk duds. My goal is to not binge tomorrow through Sunday. That's all. Then I can go crazy on Monday.0
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I'm really anxious today. I have the final presentation of my grad school career and I'm really nervous. I spent all day bingeing yesterday and now I'm bloated and my face is swollen. I'm unprepared for the presentation and I'm terrible at public speaking. There's probably going to be food there and because I'll be nervous I may be able to avoid it, or otherwise I'll gorge myself the whole time to avoid talking about my project. I also won't eat until before then because I'm nervous which may set me up for a binge later. I need to just not binge until Monday afternoon. That's it!0
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I had really bad binges the past two days. Finals are over and I'm staying at school to work for the summer and I feel really anxious. I had lost about 6 pounds but no I gained back 8. Perfect. I'm thinking of dropping super low for calories since I'm barely even working out and once I'm over 2000 for the day, it usually ends up being near or above 3000. And I don't need even half of that with the amount I'm doing rn. I'm absolutely disgusted with myself. Also, it's super hot here and everyone is in shorts and tank tops, while I'm in pants and sweatshirts 1. to hide my fat body and 2. cuz none of my clothes fit me0
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I've been doing okay this week, but I have a graduation party to go to tomorrow and a brunch on Sunday.... I'm really bad about just saying "screw it" and binging when I can't realistically log what I'm eating/drinking, and I'm so nervous I'm going to ruin all my hard work from this week. I'm also going to the beach in a week, so that's an extra dose of anxiety.
I just have a really bad feeling about this weekend... self-fulfilling prophecy? Probably. I've been telling myself that if I can get my binges down to just once a week, I can live with it. But I can't do that this week!!! Ugh.
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I'm really anxious today. I have the final presentation of my grad school career and I'm really nervous. I spent all day bingeing yesterday and now I'm bloated and my face is swollen. I'm unprepared for the presentation and I'm terrible at public speaking. There's probably going to be food there and because I'll be nervous I may be able to avoid it, or otherwise I'll gorge myself the whole time to avoid talking about my project. I also won't eat until before then because I'm nervous which may set me up for a binge later. I need to just not binge until Monday afternoon. That's it!
What is your presentation on? Maybe if you tell us about it, it'll help
I'm thinking of going to grad school myself within the next year. 0 -
It went really well! And no binge so far. I didn't eat at all at the event, thankfully. Otherwise I'm sure I would have gotten carried away, although I wouldn't have binged in public. The presentation was about a mobile health navigator program that I'm designing for a clinic that caters specifically to survivors of sex trafficking and sexual violence. It's been a really great experience and I've learned a lot in the process!3
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Before February, I bought a lot of dresses in anticipation for the weather and was excited to wear them.
After all the real weight gain, I've been too ashamed to even really look at them. I've just worn my "mom" jeans to dinners, the mall, and anything else fun. I'm almost three weeks without a binge and dammit, I'm going to wear my little yellow dress today.2 -
I can't stop bingeing0
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2 days binge free and I hoped to keep counting binge free days but yesterday I binged badly. Woke up feeling like crap today. I know what triggered it. But how to avoid have no idea...
I hope today I go clean... 1 -
I spent all day bingeing yesterday. I woke up completely swollen, my eyes barely open haha. I am graduating tomorrow. My parents get in today, which means for the next week I'll be eating out a lot. I think that's why I've been bingeing so much, is the anticipation. At this point I'm gonna just try not to binge in between meals even if I overindulge at meals. Gonna try to squeeze in a short workout today and drink lots of water.0
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I spent all day bingeing yesterday. I woke up completely swollen, my eyes barely open haha. I am graduating tomorrow. My parents get in today, which means for the next week I'll be eating out a lot. I think that's why I've been bingeing so much, is the anticipation. At this point I'm gonna just try not to binge in between meals even if I overindulge at meals. Gonna try to squeeze in a short workout today and drink lots of water.
Just want you to know I'm thinking about you. You sure have been struggling and I really admire your honesty on here. You've just got so much going on all at once right now and that is so difficult. Hopefully when everything is over you can get back on a routine and that may help. Hang in there sweetie.3 -
@ab6046 that's really rough and I'm really sorry. Definitely try to stay hydrated. And don't forget, you're graduating! So congrats! Try not to let how much you're struggling take away from the event! You can get back on track. If you want to talk or vent or need support, feel free to message me.0
