About 5 years ago I had a perfect storm of losses and hurts that I handled by eating. And eating and eating and eating until I gained 90 lbs in one year. Since then I've yo-yo-ed around over 200 lbs. With some major life changes - taking some time off work for my mental health, moving cross country to be near family, a lot of writing and self-reflection, and some serious attention to therapy, I've been healing and thinking and feeling again. Well. This morning I stepped on the scale, and I weighed 199.7 lbs. I feel like the 200 lb wall (my own glass ceiling) was just shattered. I feel empowered and liberated and strong. I'm never going to forget the grief of that year, but it doesn't define me, rather it teaches me. I'm sad for the self-destruction, but I'm proud of my self-forgiveness. My weight has been so tied into my self-image that I could spin out of control if I pop back up over 200. Well, you know what. I will go back over 200 lbs because our weight naturally fluctuates a few pounds because of salt or water or whatever, but the trajectory is downward to my 145 goal. My wins are that I'm making healthy food choices, I move most every day, and I am in this group with all of you inspiring people who remind me that health is the journey, not the destination. So, thank you for the support and the motivation and the incredible stories and honesty you all share here each day.

angmarie28
wednesdays
PW-150
CW-150.4

well with the happenings of this week, and my least favorite time of month on top of that, im surprised its that good.