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  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    Hi everyone. I'm Ziortza, I'm 36 years old and I want to start a change.
    I've been fat my entire life. I've tried all the unhealthy diets you can imagine. I even had bulimia.
    I had a stomach surgery in 2008 that was making me lose weight for some months.
    I have hypothyroidism and POS. I'm vegetarian. I love doing sport and I love mostly healthy food.

    But here is the thing! I love drinking cola light. Way too much. And I like sweet breakfasts. Also, I'm the kind of person that copies the cravings of the others. That means that if I'm living with someone that craves chips, I will end up craving chips too.

    I started with MFP years ago and it was nice to count calories, but nothing changed. Now I started again but I'm with a dietist that I hope she will help me in other ways.

    I need to lose lots of weight. I'm in 134 kg :(

    Hi @Marigorringo Ziortza,

    Welcome to LL.

    In reading your opening post I have the impression that you are in the center of your thoughts instead of above them. Meaning they are controlling you more than they should. Thoughts are not fact. You are not your thoughts. Thoughts are things that pass through that sometimes help or sometimes hinder.

    To cut through the noise you have a couple of options. The easiest to try first is "driving through" the thoughts towards your goal and beliefs. This means you have the thoughts. You are self-aware that the thoughts are not required action so you choose not to act on them.

    I am very much in favor of limiting the mental battles. Since all you need is a calorie deficit it doesn't actually matter what kind of food you eat as long as the calories are not much above your daily goal. However, some foods can chew up too much of a daily goal without being satiating or they crowd out proper nutrition too often so they have to be managed. As an example I could drink a high calorie milkshake for each meal and still lose weight but it would not fill me up which would leave me miserable and it would not be balanced enough nutrition to do it day after day.

    I am not 100 percent sure what you mean by cola light. If that is a sugar free cola though there is no reason I am aware of to limit yourself unless you are drinking it in high excess.

    If your "sweet breakfast" is a problem instead of being a person who wants one everyday become a person who wants one once a week. When you want to have one remind yourself that you only eat that on (presumably) a weekend morning. Teach yourself to postpone your gratification. It is not that you can't have one at all it is that you need to wait to whatever day you choose to make it acceptable.

    If your cravings are causing you to snack so much you don't stay in your goal try telling yourself that you do not have to eat what you crave. You can ignore them until they go away. If they seem hard to ignore you can busy yourself with other things. What you don't want to do is reinforce them. If you decide to have some chips wait until you are not craving them at all.

    However, keep in mind that if you can make chips and a sweet breakfast fit easily in your calorie goal there is no reason to eliminate them.

  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    AnnasMom89 wrote: »
    Hello ya'll. This is my second time here but I'm really trying to get back on board with things. I'm the heaviest I've ever been at about 303 and I'm so unhappy. I have so much to lose-- but so much more to GAIN. Like someone else said, the key is taking it day by day.

    On that note, feel free to send me a friend request. My diary is open to everyone! I believe in cutting calories/portion control. It's worked in the past :)

    Hi @AnnasMom89,

    Welcome.

    I do believe the key is living today, being as happy as possible doing it, make a little progress, and then let tomorrow be tomorrow you's problem. If today does not end well tomorrow is your next chance to make a little progress. There is not a lot of weight to lose there is only the fraction of a pound that you can chip off today.

    I also believe in changing a little at a time and eventually become the thinner person mentally as well as physically.

    I look forward to you sharing your ongoing story with us. There is much to gain. I can't even believe all that I had given up.
  • merph518
    merph518 Posts: 702 Member
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    merph518 wrote: »
    Hello! I've been looking for a group like this since I migrated to using MFP about a month ago. Every group I had found was completely dead.

    I've been working toward improving my health and losing weight since the first of the year. It wasn't a New Year's resolution or anything, just happened to be the day I buckled down and got serious after the holiday.

    I started off at 386.6 lbs, the highest weight I've ever been. I was miserable, it just took me a long time to realize why I was miserable. Walking around was tiring, I had heartburn all the time, and I was having trouble sleeping -- to the point where I was sleeping in a recliner for a good six months.

    I made some changes to my diet -- cutting out sweets, fast food, basically anything calorie dense. Logged everything I ate and tracked my calories burned using a WearOS watch.

    This morning I hit a new low of 318.4 lbs. I still have a long ways to go, but I'm headed in the right direction. I'm also happier than I have been in years. The heartburn's all but gone, I'm no longer winded just walking, and I've been back in bed where I belong at night since March or so.

    I hope that everyone else sees a similar success! Feel free to friend me if you'd like.

    Cheers,
    Merph



    Hi. I see this post is from awhile back. How much do you weigh now?

    Hovering around 270ish at the moment. 😁
  • aishmartin
    aishmartin Posts: 468 Member
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    Hi all! I'm starting MFP again and have about 80 lbs. to lose.

    I just started back about two weeks ago and have been eating about 1450 calories a day (I'm 5'1") even though MFP recommends 1200 calories (as always). I'm trying to do Keto mainly because I'm a type 2 diabetic and my doctor supports it. My biggest problem is portion control. I love going back for thirds, eating half the box of cereal, eating the whole cake/tub of ice cream, and drinking three shakes. I'm hopeful that this time will be the time I stick to it, but I'm worried that history will repeat itself.

    I'm going to try, though!
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    aishmartin wrote: »
    Hi all! I'm starting MFP again and have about 80 lbs. to lose.

    I just started back about two weeks ago and have been eating about 1450 calories a day (I'm 5'1") even though MFP recommends 1200 calories (as always). I'm trying to do Keto mainly because I'm a type 2 diabetic and my doctor supports it. My biggest problem is portion control. I love going back for thirds, eating half the box of cereal, eating the whole cake/tub of ice cream, and drinking three shakes. I'm hopeful that this time will be the time I stick to it, but I'm worried that history will repeat itself.

    I'm going to try, though!


    Hi @aishmartin,

    Welcome.

    One of the things that I failed to apply to my own life for a very long time is a saying that I have known for a very long time: Insanity is repeating the same actions over and over while expecting different results. As I said, it took me years to finally wake up and apply this to my weight loss. I would repeat the same basic types of weight loss plans and expect myself to stick with it. When I inevitably failed I always assumed it was a personal weakness. I assumed I didn't have enough willpower. I was insane.

    Once I figured out that those past weight loss failures were a fertile ground of knowledge instead of a benchmark of my lack of willpower things changed. I came up with a list of how I normally fail then I designed a plan around it.

    I encourage you not to just expect yourself to stick with a plan but make a plan that is really easy to stick with. I have no idea if that is keto for you. Only you can decide that. Losing weight, and your doctor should agree, is far more important than the method you choose to do it. You have the added complication of your diabetes but that should not normally require keto level carbs. Perhaps you could ask your doctor to refer you to a registered dietitian so you know the rules for you.

    The other thing to do is challenge or dispute your thoughts about loving thirds. Take a moment before eating them and ask yourself some questions. Here are some possibilities. Do you need to eat this food or do you want to eat it? Is it helping you or hurting you? How long will the pleasure of eating this food really actually last? How will you feel after you eat more than you need? How empowering will it feel to not give in this time? Do you love eating thirds or do you really hate it?
  • bmeadows380
    bmeadows380 Posts: 2,981 Member
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    NovusDies wrote: »
    aishmartin wrote: »
    Hi all! I'm starting MFP again and have about 80 lbs. to lose.

    I just started back about two weeks ago and have been eating about 1450 calories a day (I'm 5'1") even though MFP recommends 1200 calories (as always). I'm trying to do Keto mainly because I'm a type 2 diabetic and my doctor supports it. My biggest problem is portion control. I love going back for thirds, eating half the box of cereal, eating the whole cake/tub of ice cream, and drinking three shakes. I'm hopeful that this time will be the time I stick to it, but I'm worried that history will repeat itself.

    I'm going to try, though!


    Hi @aishmartin,

    Welcome.

    One of the things that I failed to apply to my own life for a very long time is a saying that I have known for a very long time: Insanity is repeating the same actions over and over while expecting different results. As I said, it took me years to finally wake up and apply this to my weight loss. I would repeat the same basic types of weight loss plans and expect myself to stick with it. When I inevitably failed I always assumed it was a personal weakness. I assumed I didn't have enough willpower. I was insane.

    Once I figured out that those past weight loss failures were a fertile ground of knowledge instead of a benchmark of my lack of willpower things changed. I came up with a list of how I normally fail then I designed a plan around it.

    I encourage you not to just expect yourself to stick with a plan but make a plan that is really easy to stick with. I have no idea if that is keto for you. Only you can decide that. Losing weight, and your doctor should agree, is far more important than the method you choose to do it. You have the added complication of your diabetes but that should not normally require keto level carbs. Perhaps you could ask your doctor to refer you to a registered dietitian so you know the rules for you.

    The other thing to do is challenge or dispute your thoughts about loving thirds. Take a moment before eating them and ask yourself some questions. Here are some possibilities. Do you need to eat this food or do you want to eat it? Is it helping you or hurting you? How long will the pleasure of eating this food really actually last? How will you feel after you eat more than you need? How empowering will it feel to not give in this time? Do you love eating thirds or do you really hate it?

    All great suggestions! ^^

    Is this your regular general practitioner or a specialist in diabetes? Nothing wrong in trying keto but its not for everyone and if you find yourself hating it, the likelihood of maintaining it is low. If you do like that method of eating, then great! I just ask about the doctor because I know from personal experience most gp's are not well trained in nutrition or other fields, and a diabetes specialist may be able to help you tailor a plan of care for you.

    Meanwhile if portion control is a problem have you considered buying individual serving packs of cookies, chips, etc? I know that doesn't always stop you from eating more than one bag but it has worked very well for me when it comes to chips, so I thought I'd throw it out there!
  • bmeadows380
    bmeadows380 Posts: 2,981 Member
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    NovusDies wrote: »
    AnnasMom89 wrote: »
    Hello ya'll. This is my second time here but I'm really trying to get back on board with things. I'm the heaviest I've ever been at about 303 and I'm so unhappy. I have so much to lose-- but so much more to GAIN. Like someone else said, the key is taking it day by day.

    On that note, feel free to send me a friend request. My diary is open to everyone! I believe in cutting calories/portion control. It's worked in the past :)

    Hi @AnnasMom89,

    Welcome.

    I do believe the key is living today, being as happy as possible doing it, make a little progress, and then let tomorrow be tomorrow you's problem. If today does not end well tomorrow is your next chance to make a little progress. There is not a lot of weight to lose there is only the fraction of a pound that you can chip off today.

    I also believe in changing a little at a time and eventually become the thinner person mentally as well as physically.

    I look forward to you sharing your ongoing story with us. There is much to gain. I can't even believe all that I had given up.

    I know from personal experience as well as testimony by many others that if you are unhappy being obese you'll find yourself unhappy when you lose the weight because criticism of self will merely change tones. "Your skin is saggy" or "you are still to big" or "you should have never gotten so obese in the first place."

    I'm the resident expert on self-criticism lol. It gives NovusDies fits :grin:

    I know rationally that imperfection is the human experience and that being accepting of myself, being forgiving of myself when I fail even though I still try to improve is needed for genuine happiness and well being and that setting myself up with impossible expectations is self defeating; getting it from rational understanding to ingrained response is much harder!
  • CM_73
    CM_73 Posts: 554 Member
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    Hi all, joined here after reading some very inspirational words on the forums from NovusDies.
    I've been at this a very long time, IRO 12 years I think. I wouldn't describe myself as a yo-yo dieter but I do follow a similar sort of pattern of committing to a calorie deficit then falling off the wagon and rocketing back up again.

    Anyway, back again, trying again but with a slightly different mindset. Very long story short but I have stats, diaries, graphs etc going back years and what is painfully clear is that when I fall off the wagon, if I just maintained then I'd be in a far better place when I get back into it again instead of starting from square one each time. So, that's the goal really!

    Currently I'm around 250lbs, higherst recoreded is over 270, goal weight I have absolutely no idea of.
    Short term goals are:

    1) 230 - ish lbs which is about where I get to on each attempt.
    2) >220 which is the lowest weight I've been since birth...
    3) Actual ideal weight, no idea what that is but I'm guessing around 180, something like that. I guess I'll know when I get there!
  • jennyagustin09
    jennyagustin09 Posts: 5 Member
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    Hello everyone! My name is jenny, I’m 21 and i am 5’4 weighing at 250 pounds. I’ve been struggling with my weight for basically my entire life and my heaviest was during high school when i was over 320 pounds. Two years ago, i said enough was enough and started focusing on my health and did the keto diet and lost over 90 pounds in a year. Was it the most healthy way? Absolutely not, i was weak all the time, my hair was falling out, and i was struggling with depression and body dysmorphia. So when i incorporated carbs back into my life i gained about 30 pounds in one year and i dread it every day! I found that keto was not the lifestyle i wanted to have and it was just a temporary fix because once you’re off keto, the weight will come back like wildfire. I want to focus on eating healthy, on a calorie deficit, and continue staying active since that is what i love to do. I’m working on my relationship with food and binge eating but it’s a work in progress. I hope to learn a lot from everyone and get some insight on counting calories and getting to my goal weight of 180. Ive never been under 200 since elementary school so that would be insane!!
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    Hello everyone! My name is jenny, I’m 21 and i am 5’4 weighing at 250 pounds. I’ve been struggling with my weight for basically my entire life and my heaviest was during high school when i was over 320 pounds. Two years ago, i said enough was enough and started focusing on my health and did the keto diet and lost over 90 pounds in a year. Was it the most healthy way? Absolutely not, i was weak all the time, my hair was falling out, and i was struggling with depression and body dysmorphia. So when i incorporated carbs back into my life i gained about 30 pounds in one year and i dread it every day! I found that keto was not the lifestyle i wanted to have and it was just a temporary fix because once you’re off keto, the weight will come back like wildfire. I want to focus on eating healthy, on a calorie deficit, and continue staying active since that is what i love to do. I’m working on my relationship with food and binge eating but it’s a work in progress. I hope to learn a lot from everyone and get some insight on counting calories and getting to my goal weight of 180. Ive never been under 200 since elementary school so that would be insane!!

    Hi @jennyagustin09 Jenny,

    Glad you are going to join us. I am hoping we can be a small part of transforming your life now instead of it happening much later as it has with me.

    Are you currently in treatment for any of your issues? No judgment one way or another but I want to be careful that we do not suggest anything that would get in the way of your recovery. Is it safe to assume that some of your depression issues were resolved with eating a normal diet again? I am aware that low carb diets can have a very negative impact on people with underlying depressions issues because a calorie deficit combined with low carb lowers your seratonin levels.

    Moving on... you mention keto as not the lifestyle you sustain but keto is not a lifestyle, it is a way of eating. I am bringing this up because your lifestyle is the sum of how you live your life not just food. To lose weight and keep it off you gradually change more than your food. I suspect you know this which is why you are working on your relationship with food.

    You also know this but it is important that from this point forward you take a whole body and mind approach to getting healthier. You want to get the weight off in a way that you can enjoy all the new NSVs you will discover and get to the end not only healthy bu ready to maintain what you have done for the rest of your life.
  • Andrea222
    Andrea222 Posts: 27 Member
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    Hi, I'm Andrea and I'm new to this forum. My weight history is that I'm down about 130 pounds from my heaviest of 380. And at 5'3", that was quite a lot. I think I was almost round! The lowest I ever got was 220, which is still high, but boy did I feel good at that weight. Now, I'm older, and I'm at 250, trying to finally get down to a healthy weight.

    I used to be an all or nothing eater. I was either on a diet or I was off it. If I had one fry, then I had to eat the entire portion, and better make it an extra large, because fries weren't on my diet. And by the way, my whole day was blown, so I made sure I ate as much as I could throughout the rest of the day.

    I've gotten over that kind of thinking, thank goodness. If I have fries for lunch, I get a small order and enjoy it. And it doesn't mean the day was blown. I've also learned I can't bring certain foods into the house. So I've improved in my eating in a lot of ways. But I still struggle at night. I'm hoping this forum might be of help. I've heard community is really important for people struggling with eating.
  • rockconner
    rockconner Posts: 75 Member
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    Well, hello! I'm glad to find this group.

    I'm Rock, Christian & married, right leg amputee, 60 years old, 6 feet even, 308# with 123# left to lose. I started at 372# with WW in January 2020, then switched in May to MFP because I was almost always below points & I wanted automated tracking of more than just points. I try to meet my daily goals for calories, protein, fiber, & sodium. And I started exercising this week!

    I appreciate sharing & getting tips, recipes, & encouragement. Hit me up! I'd like to have MFP friends with lots to lose like me.
  • bmeadows380
    bmeadows380 Posts: 2,981 Member
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    Hi, SAndrea, Rock, Jenny , and cm_73 !


    @cm-73,

    you like numbers and spreadsheets? You'll fit in fine around here lol I'm trying a spreadsheet though its behind now because of vacation, but I don't think I quite have the right hang of it.


    @jennyagustin09 That's the thing with fad diets - you hear so much about them, how they are the best, you can only lose weight on them, blah, blah, blah, but the real truth is completely muddled, on purpose of course, because the intent behind fad diets to sell products not actually help people lose weight. the truth, however, is timeless and simple - to lose weight, you eat less than what your body burns. So any healthy way of eating (obviously a mono diet is dangerous as well as some of these others) combined with a sensible goal and lots and lots of patience will work in the long run. The patience part is what gets to us all, especially when you have a LOT to lose. And I've done my fair share and then some of whining in the doom and gloom thread :grin:

    So you've gotten some really good data for yourself - you know keto won't work for you long term (me neither; my diet usually consists of 50% carbs because carbs are what hold me and fill me up and I need variety; I can't stand eating the same thing for a week, which is why I've learned to make recipes smaller so I don't get a freezer full of them!). And you've got a leg up on some of us - you've figured it out when you are very young, which is to your benefit!

    @Andrea222

    the good news is that you are learning where your problems lie; I know for me that was a huge win! One of my biggest problems is "head hunger" meaning my brain wants me to eat, drives me to eat, but my body isn't really hungry. I've only recently started figuring out how to differentiate between the two. It's still very hard to resist the impulse to snack or eat something else when I know its not my tummy that is hungry and its just my brain wanting something either out of boredom or just habit, and sometimes I still find myself standing in the kitchen in front of the open fridge or open pantry, but figuring out the difference was a big help. And realizing that evenings are when its worse so I need to save as many calories as I can for that time period because I know that's when the drive to eat hits and when my willpower is the lowest, making it much harder for me to win compromises with myself. I've also learned the hard way what snacks I can and cannot keep in the house. For instance: a bag of chocolate chips or a large bag of regular chips are a no-no. if its a large bag, I won't stop at one serving. But if its a single serving bag, I can, so even though they are more expensive, on the rare occasion I want chips or cookies, I get the single serving ones.


    @rockconner

    You've come a long way - congratulations! I've heard a lot of complaints on WW's newest plan; there's a whole thread out there somewhere on folks who have done as you did - quit and pick up MFP and calorie counting. For losing weight, the only thing that matters is calories, but for health, the macros come into play, and its nice that you can track the macros and nutrients here that are important to you and your own health make up.

    Even if I drive folks crazy here with all my long winded rambling posts, I very much appreciate having folks to talk to who are trying to lose weight sensibly and who understand the struggles that come with losing a LOT of weight - the patience needed the set backs, the boredom, fat brain, head hunger vs true hunger, and the fact that intuitive eating doesn't work for most of us and eating when we felt hunger is what likely got us in the shape we're in in the first place; at least, that's true for me - little activity and eating way too much without even realizing how much I was actually eating. I sincerely wish I could get my mother to understand this. She thinks that she and dad don't eat much of anything and can't figure out why dad's blood sugar is so high, but I see what she puts on a plate and know that she's routinely eating 2 or 3 servings at every meal and serving dad with it, too. For instance: we had spaghetti the last night of our vacation. I weighed out a 2 oz serving which has 54 carbs already. She cooked over half the box, which meant she and dad had at least 2 servings each - which would be 108 carbs in the pasta alone! And dad is showing signs that carbs elevate his blood sugar! But I can't get them to see the problem with this. *sigh*

    I'm a Christian too - in fact I need to get off here and figure out what my offertory is going to be this morning lol :tongue:
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    Andrea222 wrote: »
    Hi, I'm Andrea and I'm new to this forum. My weight history is that I'm down about 130 pounds from my heaviest of 380. And at 5'3", that was quite a lot. I think I was almost round! The lowest I ever got was 220, which is still high, but boy did I feel good at that weight. Now, I'm older, and I'm at 250, trying to finally get down to a healthy weight.

    I used to be an all or nothing eater. I was either on a diet or I was off it. If I had one fry, then I had to eat the entire portion, and better make it an extra large, because fries weren't on my diet. And by the way, my whole day was blown, so I made sure I ate as much as I could throughout the rest of the day.

    I've gotten over that kind of thinking, thank goodness. If I have fries for lunch, I get a small order and enjoy it. And it doesn't mean the day was blown. I've also learned I can't bring certain foods into the house. So I've improved in my eating in a lot of ways. But I still struggle at night. I'm hoping this forum might be of help. I've heard community is really important for people struggling with eating.

    Hi @Andrea222,

    Welcome to LL.

    You have done remarkable both in progress and adopting a better mindset.

    There are studies that show that surrounding yourself with people with habits you want to emulate is helpful and surrounding yourself with people who have habits you want to avoid a hindrance. I do not know if that applies to social media groups but I would like to think it does at least partially.
  • bobsburgersfan
    bobsburgersfan Posts: 6,327 Member
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    Welcome, everyone! It's so nice to see so many new members in the last couple of weeks! I encourage all of you to just dive in and start posting and participating, because that's how we get to know each other!
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    rockconner wrote: »
    Well, hello! I'm glad to find this group.

    I'm Rock, Christian & married, right leg amputee, 60 years old, 6 feet even, 308# with 123# left to lose. I started at 372# with WW in January 2020, then switched in May to MFP because I was almost always below points & I wanted automated tracking of more than just points. I try to meet my daily goals for calories, protein, fiber, & sodium. And I started exercising this week!

    I appreciate sharing & getting tips, recipes, & encouragement. Hit me up! I'd like to have MFP friends with lots to lose like me.

    Hi @rockconner,

    Welcome.

    You have made great progress so far. Just so you know that when you start exercising you may experience a bump on the scale for a week or two especially if you feel sore at all. This is your body retaining additional water weight to deal with muscle repair and inflammation.

    I think you will find many people in this group with a lot to lose and several that started that way but are at different points that can offer perspectives as well.
  • AlexandraFindsHerself1971
    AlexandraFindsHerself1971 Posts: 3,106 Member
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    @jennyagustin09 : I really do encourage you to start working with a therapist. I would have said I didn't have big issues, but as I have lost my first 35 pounds, a WHOLE LOT OF STUFF welled up and had to be dealt with. I fortunately live with people who helped me, but it would have been better to unpack it in therapy instead of dumping it on my partners. I was fortunate that my boyfriend lost over a hundred pounds and has been through some of it, but still, it's better to have a therapist.
  • NovusDies
    NovusDies Posts: 8,940 Member
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    @jennyagustin09 : I really do encourage you to start working with a therapist. I would have said I didn't have big issues, but as I have lost my first 35 pounds, a WHOLE LOT OF STUFF welled up and had to be dealt with. I fortunately live with people who helped me, but it would have been better to unpack it in therapy instead of dumping it on my partners. I was fortunate that my boyfriend lost over a hundred pounds and has been through some of it, but still, it's better to have a therapist.

    Anything that lessens the struggle is a good thing and this process can really mess with your head. I see it in myself and I see it in other group members. I think this is why many of the insurance sponsored weight loss program are taking a medical, nutritional, and counseling approach.
  • heatheralamode
    heatheralamode Posts: 15 Member
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    Hi! I’m Heather. Just joined.
    I had a rough 2019 and found myself at my heaviest around 340 and definitely wasn’t okay with that so I started tweaking things and now I’m at 309 as of this morning 😀
    I have PCOS which makes it difficult but not impossible.
    Always looking for motivation buddies!