clcommander14 wrote: »

HELLO! I am new to the board/group and just trying to find a better community to help especially with accountability. I notice that most of those that comment the most are women. I would live to find other Dad's in their 40's looking to get better on track.

The idea of small habits intrigues me. Mainly, it is how my mind works. I am an engineer who can often get overwhelmed and lose sight of the entire picture if there are too much data and action items. I use a lot of productivity tools in my life and I spent a good amount of the holidays this year working on my 2021 goals and bettering me. My god as I read that I just imagine what 20-year-old Chris would say! What a dork.

I use tools to breakdown all my goals into small bites of achievable actions so I can actually see myself ticking away at items and not get lost. It also makes it easier to fit into my other life, you know the one that works and has a family! With my goals and resolutions, I also have a weekly task or goal or whatever to do that would fit into what you guys are talking about.

So this week is making sure I achieve AT LEAST 20 minutes of activity each day. Can be a gym day or a dog walk, but just making sure, especially working from home, I do not get stagnate.

My goal for the year however is related to weight like so many. It is a long story but I am a former athlete who weighs now around 275. We have an annual trip in August and there was something I normally would do with my daughter that I could not last August because the weight limit was 275. I was so embarrassed but mad more than anything. I use my weekly/monthly/and resolution goals to get there. My goal is to get down to between 255 and 260 by August 1st.

I am curious if any of you have used reward systems for goals. I have issues with eating too much or sneaking dessert for no reason. Anyone used a point system or reward/punishment for something like that?
Enough from me for now, but thanks to all

Hi @clcommander14 ! And welcome to the group. Some of us are tech/engineers too with a similar style to your’s! I have a BE & MS in Engineering. Hopefully your being here will draw in more men as all perspectives are helpful!

I have used a reward now & again when I Really am stuck in a bad eating place. I, in effect, give myself a reward that is greater than the pain of not being able to eat my current craving.

Rewards can be helpful, research says, in the beginning of a change for the reason above.

The key is having a motivational goal that is more important than the short term reward of eating the dessert or whatever.

Why sneak dessert? That just makes it more alluring usually. Why not just have dessert that you relish every bite? It was a big ah-ha for me when I realize the moment you make a food off limits or bad, our brains make it more valuable.

But how come we never say I’m going to sneak another helping of broccoli?

So, you say you sneak dessert for no reason... there IS a reason. You get to be a detective & figure that out for you...

Things I’ve read/heard:
We’ve been so careful with our eating all day that are discipline muscle weakens

We feel deprived...how come others can have it & I can’t. Fact 78% of Americans are overweight or obese. Remembering that always helps me with my “But why can’t I...”

Some feel refined carbs stimulate their appetite
Others it’s sugar
Others it’s salt
Others it’s fats
Others it’s texture: crunch, creamy, etc.

So I stated paying attention.
I get real hunger & I get “mouth hunger”
The latter is triggered by sugars & salt (a huge surprise)...

Americans rated foods more tasty the more fat sugar & salt they had.
A piece of plain French Bread I can pass
French bread with butter harder to pass
French toast I can pass
French toast with butter pretty hard to pass
French toast with butter & maple syrup ie Triple Threat very hard to pass.

An Apple - easy to pass
Apple Fritter (salt sugar & fat) difficult

Cream easy to pass
Cream pie difficult
Ice cream horribly difficult salt sugar fat

So think about your desserts that call to you
What are they telling you
Sugar?
Salt?
Fat?

Also from a podcast- she recommends allotting say 200 calories a day to eat at a specific time as your “treat”

Then you Really think about what you Really want. Chocolate chip cookie, raspberry pie, lemon tart etc.

No food is bad only quantities.

Do you have a food scale?
That will help you SO MUCH in getting to better portion sizes.

I no longer let myself “eat with abandon” it had become my form of destresser my relaxation with dire health consequences.

It’s just food.
It’s bit comfort
It’s not fun
It’s not a friend
It’s not relaxation

It’s food that is broken down by your body to give you energy, rebuild cells, and live life fully.

My big reason for losing 75 lbs (85 from my all time high) was to be with my husband and son as long as humanly possible & as ACTIVELY as possible. This has stopped me from eating many times. And it’s gotten me to walk 10K steps every day for coming on 3 years. And it’s gotten me to maintain for 2.5 years.

Sorry for writing so much but hopefully something in here will help you!

Welcome to the group
Maddie

PKM0515 wrote: »

Maddie, I love the idea of allotting 200 calories for a treat! As a diabetic and someone that is "told" by MFP that I'll GAIN on 1200 calories, I probably shouldn't do this. However, I may try it three tines a week. (I'm currently in maintenance, not actively trying to lose.)

Hi @PKM0515
Do you find you gain on 1200 carefully weighed, measured, tracked calories?

I was told 1200-1400 by many sources,but lost 4lbs a week on about 1600-1900

Perhaps try this with 100 calories every day if you do actually gain on 1200 per day
Daily habits are better/more successful...

Or if you exercise you could add 100 cals worth + the 100 etc get an added health benefit.

In partnership
Maddie ❤️