joha5603 Member

@lorrainequiche59 ... my heart goes out to you and your daughter. May you all find peace in this difficult time.

If you're comfortable, please explain? I am in an IBR repayment plan.

I'm wishing the best for you all and success on your journeys, wherever they may lead you! I'm going to scurry on out of here now. Thanks for the support. :)

@lorrainequiche59 ...! "A soft space to land"... I've never heard anyone but myself use this phrase. How interesting! Beyond that, how wonderful that you can be that for him. :)

Update: I found a meeting that I really like. It's sweet. It's at a "spiritual enrichment center" and held discussion style. They turn off all the lights and light candles around the room and hold the meeting like that. The resulting darkness and candle-glow provide both a feeling of not being seen, but also of intimacy…

Hugs back to you. And thank you for sharing your experience!

The frequency (3 in 30) is a pretty new thing for me and likely a result of something like PTSD from my father's illness and death, ending my marriage and separating my family, buying a home, all within a year... or it could be because I'm an alcoholic! I don't know and I'm not one to make rash decisions, nor hold myself…

It is just in these last couple years that I've been able to see what a ridiculous people pleaser I was. I say "no thanks" with ease now, and feel no need to explain why/why not. But, if questioned, I have a go-to answer: I don't have a lot of down-time and I require it for my mental health and recovery. BAM. That usually…

Status check: Day 3 AF free for me. After nearly 3 months AF (what I thought of as a "reset"), my experiment with my sister to moderate at a concert in mid-December led to others... and I had a head-check recently and realized that I'd drank 4 times in 30 days, and 3 of them were doozies (memory lapses, hangovers, etc).…

I stopped swimming in October and at Thanksgiving my sister turned me on to Tabata. I've been doing a 15-minute popsugar routine, plus 12 minutes of tabata (a 4-minute circuit, 3 times) about 4-5 times a week, and running when time allows (only 2 miles, and only about twice a week). My back feels just as strong as when I…

Welcome, TheBigYin1984 ! Are you getting any exercise? LMK if you need a friend. :)

I had a nutritionist suggest to me once -- in the middle of my pregnancy, no less -- that I should aim to get back to whatever I weighed when I was 18. Good lord, woman. No. JUST NO times infinity.

No, while I was in my marriage we both drank very little (him, VERY little, me, a beer almost daily and then a doozy maybe a couple times a year).... It was after I began living alone and had too much time on my hands (and admittedly was a bit giddy about potentially new adult relationships) that I went downhill. Three big…

That's quite an accomplishment! Good on ya! Now try for another 18, or really... JUST TODAY. :wink:

Side note... how does one change this? I don't think there's any way I'm ever going to get (or need) 218 g of protein a day.

Give a holler if you're struggling today. Admittedly, I am. Also, finding it mildly ironic and humorous that I've chosen to be single and sober and nearly the same time. Greeeeeaaaaaat.

Love this!

[/quote] Eek, you misunderstood! I was agreeing with you! Your 3am experience description sounded awful and that you regretted drinking, plus your dilemma over wanting more. I agree it was a success. I love your posts and your progress. [/quote] We're good. :) I'm too happy to be snarky. Wishing us all the best today!

Oh, RubyRed427 ...! I wish I could hug you in real life! It's just a hangover, and you know it'll pass, and tomorrow you'll feel better and you will be better informed for the next time. Isn't the idea of a glass of wine lovely? Sounds so classy, so reasonable! ...but apparently it's not us. It's not for us, and it's a…

The amount of alcohol, plus the mixing, was truly so much less than what used to be my standard. I used to love a good stiff drink, and followed by a lone beer? All before 10 PM and over a span of 5 hours and a healthy meal? Pffffttt.... back in my old drinking days, this would have been considered "just getting started."…

I have a quick story. I went to a concert this weekend with my sister. I knew I was approaching 3 months AF but as I've said all along, I don't know how committed to it I am, and I'm much more comfortable with the term AF or "not drinking right now" as opposed to sobriety. My sister is about 95% AF and we've had similar…

@Drummer913 ... so cool! I'm trying my first AF concert next week. Normally this would be SUPER TOUGH for me but I'm going with my sister who is about 90% AF, and it's Willie Nelson... lol. My drinking concerts are usually rowdier bands/musicians. :smiley: So, hey, if you can do it, so can I. Cyber high-five to a sober…

But @ElC_76 ... I thought that many kombucha brands have alcohol in them, at least they did about a year ago when I was drinking them. It may not be enough, but it was enough for me to have one at work and ... feel funny. It may be like a slightly different kind of alcohol than what I was used to, and maybe I'm very…

I know when I was first considering going AF (for what looked like addiction issues to me, not for caloric reasons), I was shocked how many ppl suggested "Have you just tried maybe sipping on an O'douls?" Jiminy crickets... I found that so insulting. I'm waving my hands and saying I THINK I HAVE A PROBLEM and people are…

I'm in! I can commit to a dry month, for sure. Let's do this! :)

You've got a cyber community here for you. :)

Today wraps up 10 weeks of sobriety for me and I'm stoked about it! I am especially stoked given that I have had an incredibly difficult last 4 weeks and I am still going strong. I appreciate the support and insight I've received here, and feel like I've turned a corner. ...like, maybe I'm almost ready to go out in a…

@salleewins ... thank you for sharing that. I can't imagine, and I don't want to imagine... and yet, your darkness sheds a light. I hope it's okay to say that. I bet he was a great kid. I believe we are together in spirit with those we love, and I hope you feel him with you sometimes. My best to you. <3

Why I am going AF (or considering going AF... I'm still not sure how committed I am to it): My daughter drew me this picture once when I had a bad hangover. Check out the matching dresses and necklaces. It's cute, right?!? And sad, too, and an excellent reminder.

I've recently become unable to run due to increased time with my kids. It's an odd thing to admit to: I of course adore them and they are my EVERYTHING! -- but I used the 50-50 custody schedule for self-care (exercise, solitude, getting the house back in order, etc) and I don't have that now. Anyhow.... long story short:…